Chapter I: HAD once lost my portmanteau from behind my chaise, and twice got out

in the rain, and one of the times up to the knees in dirt, to help the postilion to tie it on, without being able to find out what was wanting.—Nor was it till I got to Montreuil, upon the landlord’s asking me if I wanted not a servant, that it occurred to me, that that was the very thing.

A servant! That I do most sadly, quoth I.—Because, Monsieur, said the landlord, there is a clever young fellow, who would be very proud of the honour to serve an Englishman.—But why an English one, more than any other?—They are so generous, said the landlord.—I’ll be shot if this is not a livre out of my pocket, quoth I to myself, this very night.—But they have wherewithal to be so, Monsieur, added he.—Set down one livre more for that, quoth I.—It was but last night, said the landlord, _qu’un milord Anglois présentoit un écu à la fille de chambre_.—_Tant pis pour Mademoiselle Janatone_, said I.

Now Janatone, being the landlord’s daughter, and the landlord supposing I was young in French, took the liberty to inform me, I should not have said _tant pis_—but, _tant mieux_. _Tant mieux_, _toujours_, _Monsieur_, said he, when there is any thing to be got—_tant pis_, when there is nothing. It comes to the same thing, said I. _Pardonnez-moi_, said the landlord.

I cannot take a fitter opportunity to observe, once for all, that _tant pis_ and _tant mieux_, being two of the great hinges in French conversation, a stranger would do well to set himself right in the use of them, before he gets to Paris.

A prompt French marquis at our ambassador’s table demanded of Mr. H—, if he was H— the poet? No, said Mr. H—, mildly.—_Tant pis_, replied the marquis.

It is H— the historian, said another,—_Tant mieux_, said the marquis. And Mr. H—, who is a man of an excellent heart, return’d thanks for both.

When the landlord had set me right in this matter, he called in La Fleur, which was the name of the young man he had spoke of,—saying only first, That as for his talents he would presume to say nothing,—Monsieur was the best judge what would suit him; but for the fidelity of La Fleur he would stand responsible in all he was worth.

The landlord deliver’d this in a manner which instantly set my mind to the business I was upon;—and La Fleur, who stood waiting without, in that breathless expectation which every son of nature of us have felt in our turns, came in.

MONTREUIL.