Chapter I: Preface

It is a difficult thing to tell the story of a life, and yet more difficult when that life is one's own. At the best, the telling has a savour of vanity, and the only excuse for the proceeding is that the life, being an average one, reflects many others, and in troublous times like ours may give the experience of many rather than of one. And so the autobiographer does his work because he thinks that, at the cost of some unpleasantness to himself, he may throw light on some of the typical problems that are vexing the souls of his contemporaries, and perchance may stretch out a helping hand to some brother who is struggling in the darkness, and so bring him cheer when despair has him in its grip. Since all of us, men and women of this restless and eager generation--surrounded by forces we dimly see but cannot as yet understand, discontented with old ideas and half afraid of new, greedy for the material results of the knowledge brought us by Science but looking askance at her agnosticism as regards the soul, fearful of superstition but still more fearful of atheism, turning from the husks of outgrown creeds but filled with desperate hunger for spiritual ideals--since all of us have the same anxieties, the same griefs, the same yearning hopes, the same passionate desire for knowledge, it may well be that the story of one may help all, and that the tale of one should that went out alone into the darkness and on the other side found light, that struggled through the Storm and on the other side found Peace, may bring some ray of light and of peace into the darkness and the storm of other lives.

ANNIE BESANT.

THE THEOSOPHICAL SOCIETY,

17 & 19, AVENUE ROAD, REGENT'S PARK, LONDON.

_August_, 1893.

CONTENTS.

CHAP.

I. "OUT OF THE EVERYWHERE INTO THE HERE"

II. EARLY CHILDHOOD

III. GIRLHOOD

IV. MARRIAGE

V. THE STORM OF DOUBT

VI. CHARLES BRADLAUGH

VII. ATHEISM AS I KNEW AND TAUGHT IT

VIII. AT WORK

IX. THE KNOWLTON PAMPHLET

X. AT WAR ALL ROUND

XI. MR. BRADLAUGH'S STRUGGLE

XII. STILL FIGHTING

XIII. SOCIALISM

XIV. THROUGH STORM TO PEACE

LIST OF BOOKS QUOTED

INDEX

LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS.

ANNIE BESANT, 1885 _Frontispiece_

HOROSCOPE OF ANNIE BESANT _Page_ 12

ANNIE BESANT, 1869 _Facing page_ 86

THOMAS SCOTT _Facing page_ 112

CHARLES BRADLAUGH, M.P. _Facing page_ 212

CHARLES BRADLAUGH AND HENRY LABOUCHERE _Facing page_ 254

NORWICH BRANCH OF THE SOCIALIST LEAGUE _Facing page_ 314

STRIKE COMMITTEE OF THE MATCHMAKERS' UNION _Facing page_ 336

MEMBERS OF THE MATCHMAKERS' UNION _Facing page_ 338