Chapter I: Front Matter

BENTLEY'S
MISCELLANY.

VOL. II.

LONDON:
RICHARD BENTLEY,
NEW BURLINGTON STREET.

1837.

LONDON:
PRINTED BY SAMUEL BENTLEY,
Dorset Street, Fleet Street.

ADDRESS.

Twelve months have elapsed since we first took the field, and every successive number of our Miscellany has experienced a warmer reception, and a more extensive circulation, than its predecessor.

In the opening of the new year, and the commencement of our new volume, we hope to make many changes for the better, and none for the worse; and, to show that, while we have one grateful eye to past patronage, we have another wary one to future favours; in short, that, like the heroine of the sweet poem descriptive of the faithlessness and perjury of Mr. John Oakhum, of the Royal Navy, we look two ways at once.

It is our intention to usher in the new year with a very merry greeting, towards the accomplishment of which end we have prevailed upon a long procession of distinguished friends to mount their hobbies on the occasion, in humble imitation of those adventurous and aldermanic spirits who gallantly bestrode their foaming chargers on the memorable ninth of this present month, while

"The stones did rattle underneath,
As if Cheapside were mad."

These, and a hundred other great designs, preparations, and surprises, are in contemplation, for the fulfilment of all of which we are already bound in two volumes cloth, and have no objection, if it be any additional security to the public, to stand bound in twenty more.

BOZ.

30th November, 1837.

CONTENTS
OF THE
SECOND VOLUME.

SONGS of the Month--July, by "Father Prout;" August; September, by
"Father Prout;" October, by J.M.; November, by C.D.; December, by
Punch Pages 1, 109, 213, 321, 429, 533

Papers by Boz:
Oliver Twist, or the Parish Boy's Progress, 2, 110, 215, 430, 534
The Mudfog Association for the Advancement of Everything 397

Poetry by Mrs. Cornwell Baron Wilson:
Elegiac Stanzas 16
Lady Blue's Ball 380
My Father's Old Hall 453

Fictions of the Middle Ages: The Butterfly Bishop, by Delta 17

A New Song to the Old Tune of Kate Kearney 25

What Tom Binks did when he didn't know what to do with himself 26

A Gentleman Quite 36

The Foster-Child 37

The White Man's Devil-house, by F.H. Rankin 46

A Lyric for Lovers 50

The Remains of Hajji Baba, by the Author of "Zohrab" 51,166

Shakspeare Papers, by Dr. Maginn:
No. III. Romeo 57
IV. Midsummer Night's Dream--Bottom the Weaver 370
V. His Ladies--Lady Macbeth 550

The Piper's Progress, by Father Prout 67

Papers by J.A. Wade:
No. II. Darby the Swift 68
III. The Darbiad 464
Song of the Old Bell 196
Serenade to Francesca 239
Phelim O'Toole's Nine Muse-ings on his Native County 319

Papers by Captain Medwin:
The Duel 76
Mascalbruni 254
The Last of the Bandits 585

The Monk of Ravenne 81

A Marine's Courtship, by M. Burke Honan 82

Family Stories, by Thomas Ingoldsby:
No. VI. Mrs. Botherby's Story--The Leech of Folkestone 91
VII. Patty Morgan the Milkmaid's Story--Look at the Clock 207

What though we were Rivals of yore, by T. Haynes Bayly 124

Papers by the Author of "Stories of Waterloo:"
Love in the City 125
The Regatta, No. I.: Run Across Channel 299
Legends--of Ballar; the Church of the Seven; and the Tory
Islanders 527

Three Notches from the Devil's Tail, or the Man in the Spanish
Cloak, by the Author of "Reminiscences of a Monthly Nurse" 135

The Serenade 149

The Portrait Gallery, by the Author of "The Bee Hive"
No. III. The Cannon Family 150
IV. Journey to Boulogne 454

A Chapter on Laughing 163

A Muster-chaunt for the Members of the Temperance Societies 165

My Uncle: a Fragment 175

Why the Wind blows round St. Paul's, by Joyce Jocund 176

Papers by C. Whitehead:
Rather Hard to Take 181
The Narrative of John Ward Gibson 240

Nights at Sea, by the Old Sailor:
No. IV. The French Captain's Story 183
V. The French Captain's Story 471
VI. Jack among the Mummies 610

Midnight Mishaps, by Edward Mayhew 197

The Dream 206

Genius, or the Dog's-meat Dog, by Egerton Webbe 214

The Poisoners of the Seventeenth Century, by George Hogarth:
No. I. The Marchioness de Brinvilliers 229
II. Sir Thomas Overbury 322

Smoke 268

Some Passages in the Life of a Disappointed Man 270

The Professor, by Goliah Gahagan 277

Biddy Tibbs, who cared for Nobody, by H. Holl 288

The Key of Granada 303

Glorvina, the Maid of Meath, by J. Sheridan Knowles 304

An Excellent Offer, by Marmaduke Blake 340

The Autobiography of a Good Joke 354

The Secret, by M. Paul de Kock 360

The Man with the Club-foot 381

A Remonstratory Ode to Mr. Cross on the Eruption of Mount Vesuvius,
by Joyce Jocund 413

Memoirs of Beau Nash 414

Grub-street News 425

The Confessions of an Elderly Gentleman 445

The Relics of St. Pius 462

A few Inquiries 470

Lines occasioned by the Death of Count Borowlaski 484

A Chapter on Widows 485

Petrarch in London 494

Adventures in Paris, by Toby Allspy:
The Five Floors No. I. 495; No. II. 575

Martial in Town 507

Astronomical Agitation--Reform of the Solar System 508

The Adventures of a Tale, by Mrs. Erskine Norton 511

When and Why the Devil Invented Brandy 518

The Wit in spite of Himself, by Richard Johns 521

The Apportionment of the World, from Schiller 549

Ode to the Queen 568

Suicide 569

The Glories of Good Humour 591

Song of the Modern Time 594

Capital Punishments in London Eighty Years ago--Earl Ferrers 595

A Peter Pindaric to and of a Fog, by Punch 606

The Castle by the Sea 623

Legislative Nomenclature 624

Nobility in Disguise, by Dudley Costello 626

Another Original of "Not a Drum was heard," 632

Index 633

ILLUSTRATIONS.

BY GEORGE CRUIKSHANK.

Page

Oliver Twist--The Dodger's way of going to work 2

A Marine's Courtship 82

Oliver Twist recovering from the fever 110

Midnight Mishaps 197

Oliver Twist and his affectionate Friends 215

A Disappointed Man 270

The Autobiography of a Good Joke 354

The Secret 360

Oliver Twist returns to the Jew's den 430

The Confessions of an Elderly Gentleman 445

Oliver Twist instructed by the Dodger 533

Jack among the Mummies 610

Portrait of Beau Nash, by W. Greatbach 414

BENTLEY'S MISCELLANY.

SONG OF THE MONTH. No. VII.

July, 1837.

BEING A BAPTISMAL CHAUNT FOR THE BIRTH OF OUR SECOND VOLUME, AS SUNG (IN CHARACTER) BY FATHER PROUT.

(Tune "_The groves of Blarney_.")

"Ille ego qui quondam," &c. &c.--_Æneid._

I.

In the month of Janus,
When Boz to gain us,
Quite "miscellaneous,"
Flashed his wit so keen,
One, (Prout they call him,)
In style most solemn,
Led off the volume
Of his magazine.

II.

Though MAGA, 'mongst her
Bright set of youngsters,
Had many songsters
For her opening tome;
Yet she would rather
Invite "the Father,"
And an indulgence gather
From the Pope of Rome.

III.

And, such a beauty
From head to shoe-tie,
Without dispute we
Found her first boy,
That she det_a_rmined,
There's such a charm in 't,
The Father's _sarmint_
She'd again employ.

IV.

While other children
Are quite bewilderin',
'Tis joy that fill'd her in
This bantling; 'cause
What eye but glistens,
And what ear but listens,
When the clargy christens
A babe of Boz?

V.

I've got a scruple
That this young pupil
Surprised its parent
Ere her time was sped;
Else I'm unwary,
Or, 'tis she's a fairy,
For in January
She was brought to bed.

VI.

This infant may be
A six months' baby,
But may his cradle
Be blest! say I;
And luck defend him!
And joy attend him!
Since we can't mend him,
Born in July.

VII.

He's no abortion,
But born to fortune,
And most opportune,
Though before his time;
Him, Muse, O! nourish,
And make him flourish
Quite Tommy-Moorish
Both in prose and rhyme!

VIII.

I remember, also,
That this month they call so,
From Roman JULIUS
The "_Cæsarian_" styled;
Who was no gosling,
But, like this Boz-ling,
From birth a dazzling
And precocious child!

GOD SAVE THE QUEEN!

OLIVER TWIST;

OR, THE PARISH BOY'S PROGRESS.

BY BOZ.

ILLUSTRATED BY GEORGE CRUIKSHANK.