Chapter VI: Part II (6)

Perhaps, however, the one capital force, operating for good upon the British aristocracy, is--the paramount reference of all accomplishments, of ambition through all its modes, and of party connexions, to the public service. This, again, which constitutes a fourth head amongst the characteristics of English society, may be viewed as both cause and effect with reference to our civil institutions. Here we regard it as a cause. It is a startling assertion to make, but we have good reason to think it true, that, in the last great war with Jacobinism, stretching through very nearly one whole quarter of a century, beyond all doubt the nobility was that order amongst us who shed their blood in the largest proportion for the commonwealth. Let not the reader believe that for a moment we are capable of undervaluing the pretensions of any class, whether high or low. All furnished martyrs to that noblest of causes. And it is not possible that this should be otherwise; because amongst us society is so exquisitely fused, so delicate are the _nuances_ by which our ranks play out and in to each other, that no man can imagine the possibility of an arrest being communicated at any point to the free circulation of any one _national_ feeling whatsoever. Great chasms must _exist_ between social ranks, where it is possible for a sentiment of nationality to be suddenly frozen up as it approaches one particular class; as a corollary from which doctrine, we have always treated with derision the scurrilous notion that our rural body of landowners, our country squires, could, by possibility, differ essentially from the rest of us. Bred amongst us, educated amongst us, intermarrying with us indiscriminately, how by any means apparent to common sense should it be possible for them to maintain an inheritance of separate ignorance, separate prejudices, or separate purposes, such as interested manufacturers and trivial satirists assume? On the same principle, it is not possible that, in questions of elementary patriotism, any palsy should check the electric movement of the national feelings through _every_ organ of its social life--except only in the one case where its organization is imperfect. Let there be a haughty nobility, void of popular sympathies, such as the _haute noblesse_ of Russia or Hungary is sometimes _said_ to be, and it will be possible that jealousy on behalf of privileges should operate so noxiously as to place such a body in opposition to the people for the sake of what it holds separately, rather than in sympathy with the people for the sake of what both hold in common. With us, this is otherwise; the very highest and most feudal amongst our nobles are associated by common rights, interests, and subjection to the laws, with the general body of the people. Make an exception for the right of demanding an audience from the sovereign, for the right of _entrée_ at St James's, for the right of driving through the Horse Guards, or for Lord Kinsale's right of wearing his hat in the royal presence--reckon off the petty discount for privileges so purely ceremonial, and absolute nothing remains to distinguish the nobility. For as to the practice of entails, the legal benefit of primogeniture, &c., these have no more essential connexion with the nobility, than the possession of land or manorial rights. They are privileges attached to a known situation, which is open equally to every man not disqualified as an alien. Consequently, we infer that, the fusion and continuity of our ranks being perfect, it is not possible to suppose, with respect to a great patriotic interest, any abrupt pause in the fluent circulation of our national sympathies. We, therefore, cannot be supposed to arrogate for the nobility any separate privilege of patriotism. But still we venture to affirm, that, if the total numbers of our nobility and their nearest connexions were summed; and if from that sum were subtracted all officers, being brothers, sons, nephews, of British peers, who laid down their lives, or suffered incurable wounds in the naval or military service of their country, the proportion will be found greater than that upon the aggregate remainder belonging to the rest of the nation. Life is the same blessing for all ranks alike. But certainly, though for all it is intrinsically the same priceless jewel, there is in the setting of this jewel something more radiantly brilliant to him who inherits a place amongst the British nobility, than to him whose prospects have been clouded originally by the doubts and fears of poverty. And, at all events, the libation of blood in the course of the last war was, we must repeat, on the part of the high aristocracy, disproportionately large.

In that proportion are those men unprincipled who speak of the English nobility as an indolent class--detached from public employments, and taking neither share nor interest in the public service. Such representations, where they are not deliberate falsehoods, point to a fact which is not uncommon; from the limited number of our nobility, and consequently the rare opportunities for really studying their habits, it is easy to see that in sketches of this order, (whether libellous amongst mob-orators, or serious in novels,) the pretended portrait has been founded on a vague romantic abstraction of what may be supposed peculiar to the condition of a patrician order under all political circumstances. Haughtiness, exclusiveness, indolence, and luxury, compose the romantic type which the delineator figures to his mind; and at length it becomes evident to any man, who has an experimental knowledge of this order, that probably the ancient Persian satraps, or the omrahs of Hindostan, have much more truly been operatively present to the describers than any thing ancient or modern amongst the realities of England. A candid person, who wishes to estimate the true, and not the imaginary nobles of England, will perceive one fact through the public journals, viz. that no class takes a more active share in that sort of the public business which naturally commends itself to their support. At least one-half of the deliberative meetings connected with the innumerable charities of London, very many of the public dinners by which such charities are promoted or commemorated, obtain the benevolent aid of noblemen as chairmen and presidents. Provincial assemblies for the same purposes, and, still more frequently, assemblies growing out of the endless political questions incident to a nation in our circumstances, receive the same influential countenance. These labours, by no means slight, added to the evening Parliamentary attendance through half the year, and the morning attendance on Parliamentary committees, together with the magisterial duties of many lords-lieutenant, sufficiently attest that in this point of public duties, (exercised without fee or compensation,) our own nobility is the only one in Europe having almost any connexion at all with the national service, except through the army. Some of this small body are pretty constantly attached to the cabinet; others act as ambassadors, as under-secretaries, or as colonial governors. And so far are they from wishing, apparently, to limit the field for their own exertions, that the late Dukes of Manchester and Richmond spontaneously extended it, by giving the countenances of their high stations to the governments of Canada, and even of Jamaica. A marquis of ancient family has lately accepted the government of Madras; and gradually, as our splendid colonies expand their proportions, it is probable that many more of them will benefit at intervals, (in their charities and public works,) from the vast revenues of our leading nobles acting as their governors. Add to these the many cases of junior nobles who sit in the House of Commons; of those who keep alive the public spirit of great provinces by standing costly contested elections; of those professionally pursuing the career of arms in the naval or land service; and then, collating all this activity with the very limited extent of our peerage taken even with their families, not the very bigotry of democracy will deny that the characteristic energy of our nation is faithfully reflected from its highest order.

Is there a feature in foreign circles odious beyond all others? It is the air of pretence, the craving after effect, the swell, the system of coquetting with accomplishments, the tumid character of _bravura_, which characterises the principle, and (to borrow an affected word from connoisseurs of art) the _motivo_ of their social intercourse. Is there a feature of manners in the English nobility, absolutely inimitable by art, and renewing for ever the impressions of simplicity and truth? It lies in that winning retirement from the artificial, the studied, the theatrical, from all jealousy of design or collusive deplay, which good sense and chastity of taste have suggested to them, as the sole style of demeanour on a level with their dignified station. Continental society is bad by its ideals. In the execution, there may be frequent differences, moderating what is offensive in the conception. But the essential and informing principle of foreign society is the scenical, and the _nisus_ after display. It is a state of perpetual tension; while, on the other hand, the usual state of English society, in the highest classes, is one of dignified repose. There is the same difference in this point between the two systems of manners, as between the English and French tone of national intercourse, in the matter of foreign relations. In France, when the popular blood is up, nothing is to be heard but bounce, menace, and defiance; for England, all the hurricanes of foreign wrath that ever blew, could not disturb her lion port of majestic tranquillity. But when we distinguish between what is English and what is foreign, it becomes proper that we should say more specifically what it is that we mean by the term "foreign;" what compass we allow to that idea. It is too palpable, and for many reasons, that the French standard of taste has vitiated the general taste of the Continent. How has this arisen? In part from the central position of France; in part from the arrogance of France in every age, as pretending to the precedency amongst the kingdoms of Christendom; in part from the magnificence of the French kings since the time of Louis XII.--that is, beginning with Francis I.; and in part, since the period 1660-80, from the noisy pretensions of the French literature, at the time creating itself, followed by that natural consequence of corresponding pretensions for the French language. Literature it was that first opened to the language a European career; but inversely the language it was that subsequently clenched and riveted the diffusion of the literature. Two accidents of European society favoured the change. Up to the restoration of our Charles II., diplomacy had been generally conducted in Latin. Efforts had been made, indeed, as early as Cardinal Richelieu's time, to substitute French. His pupil, Mazarine, had repeated the attempt; and Cromwell had resolutely resisted it. But how? Because, at that period, the resistance was easy. Historians are apt to forget that, in 1653, there was no French literature. Corneille, it is true, was already known; but the impression which he had as yet made, even upon Paris, did not merit the name of a _popular_ impression--and for this decisive reason, that, as yet, Louis XIV. was a boy. Not until seven years later, did he virtually begin to reign; whilst, as France was then constituted, nothing could be popular which did not bear the countersign and _imprimatur_ of a king and his court. The notion, therefore, adopted by all historians of English literature, (_not_ excluding the arrogant Schlegel,) that Charles II., on his restoration, laid the foundation of a "French school," being already nonsense by the very tenor of the doctrine, happens also to be chronologically impossible. English writers could not take for a model what as yet had no collective existence. Now, until the death of Charles II., no French literature could be said to have gathered or established itself; and as yet no ostentation of a French literature began to stir the air of Europe. By the time, however, that Racine, La Fontaine, Boileau, Bossuet, and Fontenelle, had begun to fix the attention of foreign courts upon the French language, a necessity, no longer to be disguised, for some modern language as the common organ of diplomacy, had made itself universally acknowledged. Not only were able negotiations continually neutralized by ignorance or unfamiliar command of the Latin; but at last, as the field of diplomacy was daily expanding, and as commerce kept ahead of all other interests, it became simply impossible, by any dexterity of evasions and compromises, to make a dead language do the offices of negotiation without barbarism and reciprocal misunderstanding. Now was commencing the era of congresses. The Westphalian congress, in 1648, had put up with Latin; for the interests which it settled, and the boundaries which it counterbalanced, were political and general. The details of tariffs were but little concerned. But those times were passing away. A modern language _must_ be selected for international treating, and for the growing necessities of travellers. French probably would, by this time, have gained the distinction at any rate; for the same causes which carried strangers in disproportionate numbers to Paris--viz. the newly-created splendour of that capital, and the extensive patronage of the French kings--must have commensurately diffused the knowledge of the French language. At such a critical moment, however, we cannot doubt that the French literature would give a determining impulse to the choice. For besides that the literature adapts itself beyond all others to the classes of society having little time for reflection, and whose sensibilities are scattered by dissipation, it offers even to the meditative the high quality of self-consistency. Springing from a low key of passion, it still justifies its own pretensions to good taste, (that is, to harmony with itself and its own principles.) Fifty years later, or about the middle of the eighteenth century, we see a second impulse given to the same literature, and therefore to the same language. A new race of writers were at that time seasoning the shallowest of all philosophies with systematic rancour against thrones and Christianity. To a military (and therefore in those days ignorant) aristocracy, such as all continental states were cursed with, equally the food and the condiment were attractive beyond any other. And thus, viz. through such accidents of luck operating upon so shallow a body of estimators as the courtiers and the little adventurers of the Continent, did the French literature and language attain the preponderance which once they had. It is true, that the literature has since lost that advantage. Germany, the other great centre of the Continent, has now a literature of her own, far more extensive, and better fitted for her peculiar strength and weakness. But the French language, though also drooping, still holds its ground as the convenient resource of lazy travellers and lazy diplomatists. This language, acting through that literature, has been the engine for fusing the people of the Continent into a monotonous conformity to one standard of feeling.

In this sense, and with a reference to this deduction, we ascribe unity to the foreign system of manners and social intercourse. Had every state in Europe been resigned to her own native temper and habits, there could have been no propriety in talking of "foreign" manners, as existing by way of antithesis to English. There must have been as many varieties of what might be called "foreign," as there happen to be considerable kingdoms, or considerable territories insulated by strong natural boundaries, or capital cities composing separate jurisdictions for the world of manners, by means of local differences continually ripening into habits. But this tendency in Europe to break up and subdivide her spirit of manners, was withered and annihilated by the unity of a French taste. The ambition of a French refinement had so thoroughly seized upon Germany, and even upon the Vandalism of arctic Sweden, by the year 1740, that in the literature of both countries, a ridiculous hybrid dialect prevailed, of which you could not say whether it were a superstructure of Teutonic upon a basis of French, or of French upon a basis of Teutonic.[9] The justification of "foreign," or "continental," used as an adequate antithesis to English, is therefore but too complete.

[Footnote 9: In the days of Gottsched, a German leader about 1740, who was a pedant constitutionally insensible to any real merits of French literature, and yet sharing in the Gallomania, the ordinary tenor of composition was such as this: (supposing English words substituted for German:) "_I demande_ with entire _empressement_, your _pardon_ for having _tant soit peu méconnu_, or at least _egaré_ from your orders, _autrefois_ communicated. _Faute d'entendre_ your ultimate _but_, I now confess, _de me trouver_ perplexed by _un mauvais embarras_."--And so on.]

Having thus explained our use of the word "foreign," we put it to any considerate man, how it should have been possible that any select tone of society could grow up amongst a body so comprehensive and so miscellaneous as the _soi-disant_ nobility of continental states? Could it be expected that 130,000 French "nobles" of 1788, needy and squalid in their habits as many of them were, should be high-bred gentlemen? In Germany, we know that all the watering-places are infested with black-leg gamblers, fortune-hunters, _chevaliers d'industrie_, through all varieties of this category. Most of these bear titles of baron, compte, &c. Are they spurious titles? Nobody knows. Such is the obscurity and extent of an aristocracy multiplying their numbers in every generation, and resting upon no basis of property, that it is equally possible for the true "baron" to lie under suspicion as a pretender, and for the false one to prosper by imposture. On the other hand, who could hope to pass himself off for six weeks as an English earl? Yet it is evident, that where counterfeit claims are so easy, the intrusion of persons unqualified, or doubtfully qualified, must be so numerous and constant that long ago every pure standard of what is noble or gentlemanly, must have perished in so keen a struggle and so vast a mob. Merely by its outrageous excess numerically, every continental "noblesse" is already lowered and vitiated in its tone. For in vast bodies, fluctuating eternally, no unity of tone can be maintained, except exactly in those cases where some vulgar prejudice carries away all alike by its strength of current.

Such a current we have already noticed in the style of scenical effort manifested by most foreigners. To be a "conteur," to figure in "proverbs," to attitudinize, to produce a "sensation"--all these are purposes of ambition in foreign circles. Such a current we have noticed in the general determination of the Continent towards French tastes; and _that_ is a worse tendency even than it used to be, for the true aristocracy of France is gone for ever as it formerly existed in the _haute noblesse_; and the court of a democratic king is no more equal to the task of diffusing good manners, than that of the American or Haytian president. Personally, the king and his family might be models of high breeding; but the insolence of democracy would refuse the example, and untrained vulgarity would fail even in trying to adopt it.

Besides these false impulses given to the continental tone of society, we have noticed a third, and that is the preposterous value given amongst foreigners to what is military. This tendency is at once a cause of vulgarity and an exponent of vulgarity. Thence comes the embroidery of collars, the betasseling, the befrogging, the flaunting attempts at "costuming." It is not that the military character is less fitted to a gentlemanly refinement than any other; but the truth is, that no professional character whatsoever, when pushed into exclusive esteem, can continue to sustain itself on the difficult eminence of pure natural high breeding. All professions alike have their besetting vices, pedantries, and infirmities. In some degree they correct each other when thrown together on terms of equality. But on the Continent, the lawyer and the clergyman is every where degraded; the senator has usually no existence; and the authentic landed proprietor, liberated from all duties but the splendid and non-technical duties of patriotism, comes forward at foreign courts only in thee character of a military officer. At some courts this is carried so far, that no man can be presented out of uniform. Has the military profession, on the other hand, benefited by such partiality? So far from it, that, were the continental armies liable to that sort of _surveillance_ which our own Horse Guards exercises over the social morals of the officers, we do not believe that one of those armies could exist for five years. The facts placed beyond denial by the capture of foreign officers' baggage, by the violated parole of honour, and by many other incidents of the late war, combine to prove the low tone of gentlemanly honour and probity in the ill-paid armies of the Continent.

Our purpose has been, to insist on the capital patriotic uses to which so splendid an aristocracy as ours _has_ been applied, and will be applied, so long as it is suffered to exist undisturbed by the growing democracy (and, worse than _that_, by the anarchy) of the times. These uses are principally four, which we shall but indicate in a few words.

First, it is in the nobility of Great Britain that the Conservative principle--which cannot but be a momentous agency wheresoever there is any thing good to protect from violence, or any thing venerable to uphold in sanctity--is chiefly lodged. Primogeniture and the church are the two corner-stones upon which our civil constitution ultimately reposes; and neither of these, from the monumental character of our noble houses, held together through centuries by the peculiar settlements of their landed properties, has any power to survive the destruction of a distinct patrician order.

Secondly, though not _per se_, or, in a professional sense, military as a body, (Heaven forbid that they should be so!) yet, as always furnishing a disproportionate number from their order to the martial service of the country, they diffuse a standard of high honour through our army and navy, which would languish in a degree not suspected whenever a democratic influence should thoroughly pervade either. It is less for what they do in this way, than for what they prevent, that our gratitude is due to the nobility. However, even the _positive_ services of the nobility are greater in this field than a democrat is aware of. Are not all our satirical novels, &c., daily describing it as the infirmity of English society, that so much stress is laid upon aristocratic connexions? Be it so: but do not run away from your own doctrine, O democrat! as soon as the consequences become startling. One of these consequences, which cannot be refused, is the depth of influence and the extent of influence which waits upon the example of our nobles. Were the present number of our professional nobles decimated, they would still retain a most salutary influence. We have spoken sufficiently of the ruin which follows where a nation has no natural and authentic leaders for her armies. And we venture to add our suspicion--that even France, at this moment, owes much of the courage which marks her gentry, though a mere wreck from her old aristocracy, to the chivalrous feeling inherited from her ancestral remembrances. Good officers are not made such by simple constitutional courage; honour, and something of a pure gentlemanly temper, must be added.

Thirdly, for all populous and highly civilized nations, it is an indirect necessity made known in a thousand ways, that some adequate control should preside over their spirit of manners. This can be effected only through a court and a body of nobles. And thence it arises, that, in our English public intercourse, through every class, (even the lowest of the commercial,) so much of respectful gravity and mutual consideration is found. Now, therefore, as the means of maintaining in strength this aristocratic influence, we request every thoughtful man to meditate upon the following proposition. The class even of our gentry breeds a body of high and chivalrous feeling; and very much so by unconscious sympathy with an order above themselves. But why is it that the amenity and perfect polish of the nobility are rarely found in strength amongst the mass of ordinary gentlemen? It is because, in order to qualify a man for the higher functions of courtesy, he ought to be separated from the strife of the world. The fretful collision with rivalship and angry tempers, insensibly modifies the demeanour of every man. But the British nobleman, intrenched in wealth, enjoys an immunity from this irritating discipline. He is able to act by proxy: and all services of unpleasant contest he devolves upon agents. To have a class in both sexes who toil not, neither do they spin--is the one _conditio sine qua non_ for a real nobility.

Fourthly as the leaders in a high morality of honour, and a jealous sense of the obligation attached to public engagements, our nobility has tightened the bonds of national sensibility beyond what is always perceived. "This is high matter," as Burke says in a parallel case; and we barely touch it. We shall content ourselves with asking--Could the American frauds in the naval war, calling sixty-four-gun ships by the name of frigates, have been suffered in England? Could the American doctrine of _repudiation_ have prospered with us? Yet are the Americans Englishmen, wanting only a nobility.

The times are full of change: it is through the Conservative body itself that certain perils are now approaching patrician order: if _that_ perishes, England passes into a new moral condition, wanting all the protections of the present.

* * * * *

JACK STUART'S BET ON THE DERBY, AND HOW HE PAID HIS LOSSES.

Cotherstone came in amid great applause, and was the winner of the poorest Derby ever known. Whilst acclamation shook the spheres, and the corners of mouths were pulled down, and betting-books mechanically pulled out--while success made some people so benevolent that they did not believe in the existence of poverty any where, and certainly not in the distress of the wretched-looking beggar entreating a penny--whilst all these things were going on, champagne corks flying, the sun shining, toasts resounding, and a perfect hubbub in full activity on all sides, Jack Stuart drew me aside towards the carriage, and said, "'Pon my word, it must be a cross. How the deuce could one horse beat the whole field?"

"Oh, you backed the field, did you?"

"To be sure. I always go with the strongest side."

"And you have lost?"

"A hundred and fifty."

No wonder Jack Stuart looked blue. A fifth part of his yearly income gone at one smash--and in such a foolish way, too.

"If the excitement could last three or four days, it would almost be worth the money," he said; "but no sooner do you hear the bell--see the crush of horses at the starting-post--bang--bang--off they go!--and in a minute or two all is over, and your money gone. I will have a race of snails between London and York. It would be occupation for a year. But come, let us leave the abominable place." He hurried me into the stanhope, gave the rein to his active grey mare, and making a detour towards Kingston, we soon left the crowd behind us.

"I will never bet on a horse again," said Jack, ruminating on his loss. "Why should I? I know nothing about racing, and never could understand odds in my life; and just at this moment, too, I can't spare the coin."

At the same time he did not spare the whip; for you will always observe, that a meditative gentleman in a gig is peculiarly impressive on his horse's shoulder. The grey trotted along, or burst into an occasional canter.

"I'll back this grey against Cotherstone for fifty pounds."

"To stand flogging? I think you would win."

"No, to jump. See how she springs."

Hereupon Jack touched the mare in a very scientific manner, just under the fore-arm, and the animal, indignant at this disrespectful manner of proceeding, gave a prodigious rush forward, and then reared.

"You'll break the shafts," I said.

"I think she is going to run away, but there seems no wall near us--and I don't think any coaches travel this road. Sit still, for she's off."

The mare, in good truth, resented her master's conduct in a high degree, and took the bit in her teeth.

"If she doesn't kick, it's all right," said Jack.

"She has no time to kick if she goes at this pace," I answered; "keep her straight."

The speed continued unabated for some time, and we were both silent. I watched the road as far in advance as I could see, in dread of some waggon, or coach, or sudden turn, or even a turnpike gate, for the chances would have been greatly against an agreeable termination.

"I'll tell you what," cried Jack, turning round to me, "I think I've found out a way of paying my losses."

"Indeed! but can't you manage in the mean time to stop the mare?"

"Poh! let her go. I think rapid motion is a great help to the intellect. I feel quite sure I can pay my bets without putting my hand into my pocket."

"How? Pull the near check. She'll be in the ditch."

"Why, I think I shall publish a novel."

I could scarcely keep from laughing, though a gardener's cart was two hundred yards in advance.

"You write a novel! Wouldn't you like to build a pyramid at the same time?"

"We've given that old fellow a fright on the top of the cabbage," said Jack, going within an inch of the wheels of the cart. "He'll think we've got Cotherstone in harness. But what do you mean about a pyramid?"

"Why, who ever heard of your writing a novel?"

"I did not say _write_ a novel--I said _publish_ a novel."

"Well, who is to write it?" I enquired.

"That's the secret," he answered; "and if that isn't one of Pickford's vans, I'll tell you"----

The mare kept up her speed; and, looming before us, apparently filling up the whole road, was one of the moving castles, drawn by eight horses, that, compared to other vehicles, are like elephants moving about among a herd of deer.

"Is there room to pass?" asked Jack, pulling the right rein with all his might.

"Scarcely," I said, "the post is at the side of the road."

"Take the whip," said Jack, "and just when we get up, give her a cut over the left ear."

In dread silence we sat watching the tremendous gallop. Nearer and nearer we drew to the waggon, and precisely at the right time Jack pulled the mare's bridle, and I cut her over the ear. Within a hairbreadth of the post on one side, and the van on the other, we cut our bright way through.

"This is rather pleasant than otherwise," said Jack, breathing freely; "don't you think so?"

"I can't say it altogether suits my taste," I answered.

"Do you think she begins to tire?"

"Oh, she never tires; don't be the least afraid of that!"

"It's the very thing I wish; but there's a hill coming."

"She likes hills; and at the other side, when we begin to descend, you'll see her pace. I'm very proud of the mare's speed."

"It seems better than her temper; but about the novel?" I enquired.

"I shall publish in a fortnight," answered Jack.

"A whole novel? Three volumes?"

"Six, if you like--or a dozen. I'm not at all particular."

"But on what subject?"

"Why, what a simpleton you must be! There is but one subject for a novel--historical, philosophical, fashionable, antiquarian, or whatever it calls itself. The whole story, after all, is about a young man and a young woman--he all that is noble, and she all that is good. Every circulating library consists of nothing whatever but Love and Glory--and that shall be the name of my novel."

"But if you don't write it, how are you to publish it?"

"Do you think any living man or any living woman ever wrote a novel?"

"Certainly."

"Stuff, my dear fellow; they never did any thing of the kind. They published--that's all. Is that a heap of stones?"

"I think it is."

"Well, that's better than a gravel-pit. Cut her right ear. There, we're past it. Amazing bottom, has't she?"

"Too much," I said; "but go on with your novel."

"Well, my plan is simply this--but make a bet, will you? I give odds. I bet you five to one in fives, that I produce, in a week from this time, a novel called 'Love and Glory,' not of my own composition or any body else's--a good readable novel--better than any of James's--and a great deal more original."

"And yet not written by any one?"

"Exactly--bet, will you?"

"Done," I said; "and now explain."

"I will, if we get round this corner; but it is very sharp. Bravo, mare! And now we've a mile of level Macadam. I go to a circulating library and order home forty novels--any novels that are sleeping on the shelf. That is a hundred and twenty volumes--or perhaps, making allowance for the five-volume tales of former days, a hundred and fifty volumes altogether. From each of these novels I select one chapter and a half, that makes sixty chapters, which, at twenty chapters to each volume, makes a very good-sized novel."

"But there will be no connexion."

"Not much," replied Jack, "but an amazing degree of variety."

"But the names?"

"Must all be altered--the only trouble I take. There must be a countess and two daughters, let them be the Countess of Lorrington and the Ladies Alice and Matilda--a hero, Lord Berville, originally Mr Lawleigh--and every thing else in the same manner. All castles are to be Lorrington Castle--all the villains are to be Sir Stratford Manvers'--all the flirts Lady Emily Trecothicks'--and all the benevolent Christians, recluses, uncles, guardians, and benefactors--Mr Percy Wyndford, the younger son of an earl's younger son, very rich, and getting on for sixty-five."

"But nobody will print such wholesale plagiarisms."

"Won't they? See what Colburn publishes, and Bentley, and all of them. Why, they're all made up things--extracts from old newspapers, or histories of processions or lord-mayor's shows. What's that coming down the hill?"

"Two coaches abreast"--I exclaimed--"racing by Jupiter!--and not an inch left for us to pass!"

"We've a minute yet," said Jack, and looked round. On the left was a park paling; on the right a stout hedge, and beyond it a grass field. "If it weren't for the ditch she could take the hedge," he said. "Shall we try?"

"We had better"--I answered--"rather be floored in a ditch than dashed to pieces against a coach."

"Lay on, then--here goes!"

I applied the whip to the left ear of the mare; Jack pulled at the right cheek. She turned suddenly out of the road and made a dash at the hedge. Away she went, harness, shafts, and all, leaving the stanhope in the ditch, and sending Jack and me flying, like experimental fifty-sixes in the marshes at Woolwich, halfway across the meadow. The whole incident was so sudden that I could scarcely comprehend what had happened. I looked round, and, in a furrow at a little distance, I saw my friend Jack. We looked for some time at each other, afraid to enquire into the extent of the damage; but at last Jack said, "She's a capital jumper, isn't she? It was as good a flying leap as I ever saw. She's worth two hundred guineas for a heavy weight."

"A flying leap!"--I said; "it was a leap to be sure, but the flying, I think, was performed by ourselves."

"Are you hurt?" enquired Jack.

"Not that I know of," I replied; "you're all right?"

"Oh! as for me, I enjoy a quiet drive, like this, very much. I'm certain it gives a filip to the ideas, that you never receive in a family coach at seven miles an hour. I believe I owe the mare a great sum of money, not to mention all the fame I expect to make by my invention. But let us get on to the next inn, and send people after the stanhope and the mare. We shall get into a car, and go comfortably home."

We did not go to the Oaks on Friday. We were both too stiff: for though a gentleman may escape without breaking his bones, still an ejectment so vigorously executed as the one we had sustained, always leaves its mark. In the mean time Jack was busy. Piles of volumes lay round him, scraps of paper were on the table, marks were put in the pages. He might have stood for the portrait of an industrious author. And yet a more unliterary, not to say illiterate, man than he had been before the runaway, did not exist in the Albany. "Curriculo collegisse juvat"--are there any individuals to whom their curricle has been a college, and who have done without a university in the strength of a fast-trotting horse? Jack was one of these. He had never listened to Big Tom of Christchurch, nor punned his way to the bachelor's table of St John's, and yet he was about to assume his place among the illustrious of the land, and have his health proposed by a duke at the literary fund dinner, as "Jack Stuart, and the authors of England;" and perhaps he would deserve the honour as well as some of his predecessors; for who is more qualified to return thanks for the authors of England than a person whose works contain specimens of so many? Your plagiarist is the true representative.

Jack's room is rather dark, and the weather, on the day of the Oaks, was rather dingy. We had the shutters closed at half-past seven, and sat down to dinner; soused salmon, perigord pie, iced champagne, and mareschino. Some almonds and raisins, hard biscuit, and a bottle of cool claret, made their appearance when the cloth was removed, and Jack began--"I don't believe there was ever such a jumper as the grey mare since the siege of Troy, when the horse got over the wall."

"Is she hurt?"

"Lord bless you," said Jack, "she's dead. When she got over the hedge she grew too proud of herself, and personal vanity was the ruin of her. She took a tremendous spiked gate, and caught it with her hind legs; the spikes kept her fast, the gate swung open, and the poor mare was so disgusted that she broke her heart. She was worth two hundred guineas; so that the Derby this year has cost me a fortune. The stanhope is all to atoms, and the farmer claims compensation for the gate. It's a very lucky thing I thought of the book."

"Oh, you still go on with the novel?"

"It's done, man, finished--perfect."

"All written out?"

"Not a word of it. That isn't the way people write books now; no, I have clipped out half of it with a pair of scissors, and the half is all marked with pencil."

"But the authors will find you out."

"Not a bit of it. No author reads any body's writings but his own; or if they do, I'll deny it--that's all; and the public will only think the poor fellow prodigiously vain, to believe that any one would quote his book. And, besides, here are the reviews?"

"Of the book that isn't published?"

"To be sure. Here are two or three sentences from Macauley's 'Milton,' half a page from Wilson's 'Wordsworth,' and a good lump from Jeffrey's 'Walter Scott.' Between them, they made out my book to be a very fine thing, I assure you. I sha'n't sell it under five hundred pounds."

"Do you give your name?"

"Certainly not--unless I were a lord. No. I think I shall pass for a woman: a young girl, perhaps; daughter of a bishop; or the divorced wife of a member of parliament."

"I should like to hear some of your work. I am interested."

"I know you are. We have a bet, you know; but I have found out a strange thing in correcting my novel--that you can make a whole story out of any five chapters."

"No, no. You're quizzing."

"Not I. I tell you, out of any five chapters, of any five novels, you make a very good short tale; and the odd thing is, it doesn't the least matter which chapters you choose. With a very little sagacity, the reader sees the whole; and, let me tell you, the great fault of story-writing is telling too much, and leaving too little for the reader to supply to himself. Recollect what I told you about altering the names of all the characters, and, with that single proviso, read chapter fifteen of the first volume of this----"

Jack handed me a volume, turned down at the two-hundredth page, and I read what he told me to call the first chapter of "Love and Glory."

THE WILDERNESS.

"A tangled thicket is a holy place
For contemplation lifting to the stars
Its passionate eyes, and breathing paradise
Within a sanctified solemnity."

_Old Play_

["That's my own," said Jack. "When people see that I don't even quote a motto, they'll think me a real original. Go on."]

The sun's western rays were gilding the windows of the blue
velvet drawing-room of Lorrington Castle, and the three ladies
sat in silence, as if admiring the glorious light which now
sank gradually behind the forest at the extremity of the park.
The lady Alice leant her cheek upon her hand, and before her
rose a vision the agitating occurrences of yesterday. The first
declaration a girl receives alters her whole character for
life. No longer a solitary being, she feels that with her fate
the happiness of another is indissolubly united; for, even if
she rejects the offer, the fact of its having been made, is a
bond of union from which neither party gets free--Sir Stratford
Manvers had proposed: had she accepted him? did she love him?
ay, did she love him?--a question apparently easy to answer,
but to an ingenuous spirit which knows not how to analyze its
feelings, impossible. Sir Stratford was young, handsome,
clever--but there was a certain something, a _je ne sçais quoi_
about him, which marred the effect of all these qualities. A
look, a tome that jarred with the rest of his behaviour, and
suggested a thought to the very persons who were enchanted with
his wit, and openness, and generosity--Is this real? is he not
an actor? a consummate actor, if you will--but merely a great
performer assuming a part. By the side of the bright and
dashing Manvers, rose to the visionary eyes of the beautiful
girl the pale and thoughtful features of Mr Lawleigh. She heard
the music of his voice, and saw the deep eyes fixed on her with
the same tender expression of interest and admiration as she
had noticed during his visit at the Castle. She almost heard
the sigh with which he turned away, when she had appeared to
listen with pleasure to the sparkling conversation of Sir
Stratford. She had _not_ accepted Sir Stratford, and she did
_not_ love him. When a girl hesitates between two men, or when
the memory of one is mixed up with the recollection of another,
it is certain that she loves neither. And strange to say, now
that her thoughts reverted to Mr Lawleigh, she forgot Sir
Stratford altogether. She wondered that she had said so little
to Mr Lawleigh, and was sorry she had not been kinder--she
recalled every word and every glance--and could not explain why
she was pleased when she recollected how sad he had looked when
he had taken leave one little week before. How differently he
had appeared the happy night of the county assembly, and at the
still happier masked ball at the Duke of Rosley's! Blind,
foolish girl, she thought, to have failed to observe these
things before, and now!----

"I have written to Lorrington, my dear Alice," said the
Countess, "as head of the family, and your eldest brother, it
is a compliment we must pay him--but it is mere compliment,
remember."

"To write to William?" mamma.

"I presume you know to what subject I allude," continued the
Countess. "He will give his consent of course."

"Oh, mamma!" cried Alice, while tears sprang into her eyes, "I
was in hopes you would have spared me this. Don't write to
William; or let _me_ tell him--let me add in a postscript--let
me"----

"You will do what I wish you, I conclude--and I have told Sir
Stratford"----

"Oh, what? what have you told him?"

"That he is accepted. I trust I shall hear no more on the
subject. The marriage will take place in two months."

"But I don't love him, mamma--indeed."

"I am glad to hear it," said the mother, coldly. "I rejoice
that my daughters are too well brought up to love any one--that
is--of course--till they are engaged; during that short
interval, it is right enough--in moderation; though, even then,
it is much more comfortable to continue perfectly indifferent.
Persons of feeling are always vulgar, and only fit for
clergymen's wives."

"But Sir Stratford, mamma"----

"Has twenty thousand a-year, and is in very good society. He
almost lives with the Rosleys. The Duke has been trying to get
him for his son-in-law for a whole year."

"And Lady Mary so beautiful, too?"

"I believe, my dear, Lady Mary's affections, as they are
called, are engaged."

"Indeed?" enquired the daughter, for curiosity in such subjects
exists even in the midst of one's own distresses.

"May I ask who has gained Lady Mary's heart?"

"I believe it is that young Mr Lawleigh, a cousin of the
Duchess--old Lord Berville's nephew; you've seen him here--a
quiet, reserved young man. I saw nothing in him, and I
understand he is very poor."

"And does--does Mr Lawleigh--like--love--Lady Mary?" enquired
Alice with difficulty.

"He never honoured me with his confidence," replied the
Countess--"but I suppose he does--of course he does--Sir
Stratford, indeed, told me so--and he ought to know, for he is
his confidant."

"He keeps the secret well," said Lady Alice with a slight tone
of bitterness; "and Mr Lawleigh could scarcely be obliged to
him if he knew the use he makes of his confidence--and Lady
Mary still less"--she added.

"Why, if girls will be such fools as to think they have hearts,
and then throw them away, they must make up their minds to be
laughed at. Lady Mary is throwing herself away--her _inamorato_
is still at Rosley House."

It was lucky the Countess did not perceive the state of
surprise with which her communication was received.

Lady Alice again placed her cheek upon her hand, and sank into
a deeper reverie than ever.

"Sir Stratford also is at Rosley, and if he rides over this
evening, I have given orders for him to be admitted. You will
conduct yourself as I wish. Come, Matilda, let us leave your
sister to her happy thoughts."

Her happy thoughts! the Lady Alice was not one of those
indifferent beings panegyrized by the Countess; she had given
her whole heart to Henry Lawleigh--and now to hear that he
loved another! She gazed along the magnificent park, and longed
for the solitude and silence of the wilderness beyond. There,
any where but in that sickening room, where the communication
had been made to her, she would breath freer. She wrapt her
mantilla over her head, and walked down the flight of steps
into the park. Deeply immersed in her own sad contemplation,
she pursued her way under the avenue trees, and, opening the
wicket gate, found herself on the little terrace of the
wood--the terrace so lonely, so quiet--where she had listened,
where she had smiled. And now to know that he was false! She
sat down on the bench at the foot of the oak, and covered her
face with her hands, and wept.

A low voice was at her ear. "Alice!"

She looked up, and saw bending over her, with eyes full of
admiration and surprise, Harry Lawleigh. Gradually as she
looked, his features assumed a different expression, his voice
also altered its tone.

"You are weeping, Lady Alice," he said--"I scarcely expected to
find you in so melancholy a mood, after the joyous intelligence
I heard to-day."

"Joyous!" repeated Alice, without seeming to comprehend the
meaning of the word. "What intelligence do you allude to?"

"Intelligence which I only shared with the whole party at
Rosley Castle. There was no secret made of the happy event."

"I really can't understand you. What is it you mean? who
communicated the news?"

"The fortunate victor announced his conquest himself. Sir
Stratford received the congratulations of every one from the
duke down to--to--myself."

"I will not pretend to misunderstand you," said Lady Alice--"my
mother, but a few minutes ago, conveyed to me the purport of
Sir Stratford's visit." She paused and sighed.

"And you replied?" enquired Lawleigh.

"I gave no reply. I was never consulted on the subject. I know
not in what words my mother conveyed her answer."

"The _words_ are of no great importance," said Lawleigh; "the
fact seems sufficiently clear; and as I gave Sir Stratford my
congratulations on his happiness, I must now offer them to you,
on the brightness of your prospects, and the shortness of your
memory."

"Few can appreciate the value of the latter quality so well as
yourself--your congratulations on the other subject are as
uncalled for as your taunts--I must return home." She rose to
depart, and her face and figure had resumed all the grace and
dignity which had formerly characterized her beauty.

"One word, Lady Alice!" said Lawleigh; "look round--it was
here--one little year ago, that I believed myself the happiest,
and felt myself the most fortunate, of men. This spot was the
witness of vows--sincerer on one side than any ever registered
in heaven--on another, of vows more fleeting than the shadows
of the leaves that danced on the greensward that calm evening
in June, when first I told you that I loved you: the leaves
have fallen--the vows are broken. Alice!--may you be
happy--farewell!"

"If you desire it, be it so--but before we part, it is right
you should know all. Whatever answer my mother may have given
to Sir Stratford Manvers, to that answer I am no party. I do
not love him: and shall never marry him. Your congratulations,
therefore, to both of us, were premature, and I trust the same
description will not apply to those I now offer to Mr Lawleigh
and Lady Mary Rosley."

"To me?--to Lady Mary?--what does this mean?"

"It means that your confidential friend, Sir Stratford, has
betrayed your secret--that I know your duplicity, and admire
the art with which you conceal your unfaithfulness by an
attempt to cast the blame of it on me."

"As I live----Alice! Alice! hear me," cried Lawleigh, stepping
after the retreating girl; "I will explain--you are imposed
on."

A hand was laid on his arm----

"He!--fairly caught, by Jupiter! whither away?" said Sir
Stratford Manvers. "Thou'st sprung fair game i' the forest,
'faith--I watched her retreat--a step like a roebuck--a form
like a Venus"----

"Unhand me, villain, or in an instant my sword shall drink the
blood of thy cowardly heart."

"Fair words! thou'st been studying the rantipoles of Will
Shakspeare, Hal. What is't, man? Is thy bile at boiling heat
because I have lit upon thee billing and cooing with the
forester's fair niece--poh! man--there be brighter eyes than
hers, however bright they be."

"Now then, we have met," said Lawleigh, in a voice of condensed
passion--"met where none shall hear us--met where none shall
see us--met where none shall part us--Ha! dost thou look on me
without a blush--the man you have injured--the friend who
trusted--the enemy who will slay?--draw!"

"This is sheer midsummer madness--put up thy toasting-fork,
Hal. This is no time nor place for imitations of Ben Jonson's
Bobadil. Zounds! man, you'll startle all the game with your
roaring--and wherefore is all the disturbance?"

"'Tis that you have traduced me, and injured me in the eyes of
one, for a smile of whose lip thou well knowest I would lay
down my life--for a touch of whose hand thou well knowest I
would sell me to the Evil One--thou hast blackened me, and I
will be avenged--ho! chicken-hearted boaster before women, and
black-hearted traitor among men, will nothing rouse thee? Hear
this, then--thou hast lied."

"Thou mean'st it?" said Sir Stratford, and drew back a step or
two.

"I do--art thou man enough to cross points on that
provocation?"

"Oh, on far less, as thou well knowest, in the way of
accommodating a young gentleman anxious to essay a feat of
arms. Thou hast said the word, and we fight--but let me ask to
what particular achievement of mine thou hast attached so ugly
an epithet. I would fain know to what I am indebted for your
good opinion so gallantly expressed."

"I will but name two names--and between them thou wilt find how
dastardly thy conduct has been."