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Chapter I: Front Matter

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TOOTSY WOOTSY WERNER (four months old),
In whose honor this book is published.]

“See, Tootsy Wootsy be’s m’ tat.”]

Werner’s

Readings and Recitations

No. 35

Cats and Kittens

NEW YORK
EDGAR S. WERNER & COMPANY

Copyright, 1906, by Edgar S. Werner

CONTENTS.

PAGE

Audacious Kitten.—Oliver Herford 184

Bad Peter, Bad Joe 119

Baron Grimalkin’s Death (Parody on Greene’s “Baron’s Last
Banquet”).—Will M. Carlton 126

Boy Blue and His Gun.—Nellie M. Garabraut 209

Boys’ Compositions on Cats 215

Cat and Fox (Fable) 137

Cat and Mouse 157

Cat and Painter.—Eleanor H. Porter 188

Cat and Tiger (Fable) 43

Cat Came Fiddling 42

Cat Convention.—Edna A. Foster 155

Cat Law-Suit 168

Cat-Life.—Lucy Larcom 185

Cat of Hindustan 228

Cat That Came to School (Action Poem) 32

Cat-egorical Courtship 115

Catching the Cat.—Margaret Vandegrift 254

Catkin 65

Cats (Parody on Southey’s “Cataract of Lodore”) 66

Cats.—Eve Lawless 34

Cats and Dogs.—Jerome K. Jerome 46

Cats’ and Kittens’ Opening Address 12

Cat’s Birthday Celebration.—Mrs. Gertrude Manly Jones 27

Cats’ Duet 146

Cats, Essay or Address on.—Stanley Schell 224

Cat’s Meat Man; or, Cupboard Love 267

Cats’ Merry, Merry Meeting (Action Song).—Stanley Schell 153

Cats Recognized by Cat Clubs of To-day 243

Cats’ Tea Party (Action Poem) 26

Cats’ Thanksgiving Day 38

Composite Cat.—Maria J. Hammond 241

Daisy’s Thanksgiving 212

Dame Trot and Her Cat 77

De Black Cat Crossed His Luck.—J.D. Corrothers 124

Dead Canary.—Mrs. Frederick W. Pender 230

Dead Kitten.—Sydney Dayre 199

Decoration of Honor.—L.E. Street 36

Dick Whittington (Song with Tableaux) 49

Dickens and His Kitten 195

Differences between Cat and Dog.—Elizabeth I. Cassin 24

Ding Dong Bell (Words only) 227

Ding Dong Bell (Song—Illustrated) 39

Dirty Kitty Cat.—Stanley Schell 194

Dishonest Cat.—Mrs. Frederick W. Pender 133

Doctor Tom Mew 98

Dog and Cat 218

Dogs and Cats.—Alexander Dumas 94

Down to St. Ives 207

Duel.—Eugene Field 143

Elder Johnson’s Lecture on Cats 69

Emblematic Signification of Cat 145

Every Mother’s Love the Best 150

False Kindness 79

Family Cat 97

Feline Fate.—Anna Robeson Brown 129

Five Kitty Cats 103

Girl, Cat and Custard 183

Good-for-nothing Cat 57

Gray’s Elegy on Horace Walpole’s Cat 232

Had to Eat It 219

Happy Family (Music) 165

Hodge, the Cat.—Susan Coolidge 117

Homeless Kitten (Music).—Jane Campbell 135

Homeliest Cat at the Show.—Rosalie M. Jones 20

How Pussy and Mousie Kept House.—A.C. Kish 68

How Pussy Bathes 187

How to Feed and Care for Cats.—Stanley Schell 240

In Liquor 260

In the Hay-Loft.—Helen Thayer Hutcheson 144

Intelligent Cat.—Grace Bacon Holway 35

Jet and Snowflake (Dialogue) 270

Jim Wolfe and the Cats.—Mark Twain 244

Just Plain Cat.—Jennie Pendleton Ewing 92

Kathie’s Story 100

Kind Boy.—Mrs. Frederick W. Pender 120

Kitten and the Falling Leaves (Action Poem).—William Wordsworth 122

Kitten and the Mouse 67

Kitten of the Regiment.—James Buckram 246

Kitten that Never Grew Old 178

Kittens’ Blind-Man’s Buff (Illustrated) 90

Kittens’ Dancing-Lesson.—Stanley Schell 179

Kittens’ Fright (Action Poem) 113

Kittens’ Promenade 74

Kitten’s View of Life.—Thomas Westwood 159

Kitty 242

Kitty at School.—Kate Ulmer 208

Kittycat and the Milkman 202

Kitty’s Lesson.—C. Grace Jerolamen 220

Lament of a Forsaken Cat.—Elizabeth Harcourt Mitchell 41

Land on Your Feet.—Sam Walter Foss 158

Language of Cats 186

Lincoln’s Motherless Kittens.—Mrs. Frederick W. Pender 196

Little Cat Made Fur Fly 264

Little Kittens 71

Little Kitty (Action Poem) 128

Little Pussy.—Taylor 121

Little Turncoats.—Georgia A. Peck 205

Lost Kitty 28

Lost Mittens (Illustrated) 201

Matthew Arnold’s Cat, Atossa 182

Matilda Martha May.—Fannie Rogers White 106

Me an’ Bab.—Joy Vetrepont 151

Me an’ Methuselar.—Harriet Ford 161

Mirror Cat.—Oliver Herford 30

Mischievous Cat.—Mrs. E.T. Corbett 206

Miss Edith’s Modest Request.—Bret Harte 138

Miss Kitty Manx to Sir Thomas Angora.—Mary S. Boyd 140

Miss Tabbycat’s Reception.—Elizabeth L. Gould 102

Mistress Kitty 96

Model Cat.—Mrs. Frederick W. Pender 271

Modest Cat’s Soliloquy 29

Mother Gray and Her Children (Music) 172

Mother Tabbyskins 82

My Cat.—Charles Baudelaire 115

My Cat and Dog.—Marori 200

My Kittens.—Olive Stevens Brown 104

My Little Gray Kitty and I 86

My Ol’ Black Cat.—Flavia Rosser 198

My Old Gray Cat and I.—Joe Lincoln 136

My Pet Cat 253

My Pussy (Music—Illustrated) 214

Naughty Pussy 233

Newsboy’s Cat; or, the Fam’ly Man.—Mrs. E.T. Corbett 213

Nobody Did It 88

Nocturnal Shot 81

Object of Love.—Mary E. Wilkins 107

Old Nursery Rhyme 78

Out for a High Time.—E. Louise Liddell 59

Outing.—Mrs. Frederick W. Pender 176

Pace That Kills 75

Partnership.—Margaret Vandegrift 75

Pet and Her Cat 174

Pins in Pussy’s Toes.—Harriet Beecher Stowe 40

Poet’s Lamentation for Loss of His Cat.—Joseph Green 261

Polly Pry’s Kitten (Action Poem) 55

Prince of Newfoundland; or, Only a Dog and a Kitten.—Celia Thaxter 141

Puss and Her Three Kittens.—Tom Hood 87

Puss in Mischief (Action Poem) 76

Pussy and the Mice 118

Pussy at School.—Louis B. Tisdale 171

Pussy-Cat 164

Pussy-Cat and Mouse on Thanksgiving 269

Pussy Gray’s Dinner 160

Pussy Willows 219

Pussy’s Dream 93

Pussy’s Vocal Lesson 169

Quousque Tandem, O Catiline?—A.L. Frisbie 257

Rash Young Mouse (Action Poem) 56

Ready for Breakfast (Illustrated) 101

Retired Cat.—William Cowper 236

Revenge for Poisoning a Cat 234

Robin Redbreast and Pussy-Cat 74

Sad Case.—Clara D. Bates 45

Sandy Jenkins’s Remarks on the Black Cat.—J.D. Corrothers 72

Scarum Cat.—Mary Elizabeth Stone 221

Sea-Puss.—Kate Upson Clark 170

Secret Told Pussie 80

Social Tea.—Mrs. Frederick W. Pender 180

Some Cat Traits 156

Southey’s Cats Write Their Master.—Robert Southey 263

Strange Mouse 239

Sunday Episode (Illustrated).—Herbert Randall 70

Tatters, the Cat.—Mrs. Frederick W. Pender 91

That Cat.—Ben King 78

Three Maidens Fair.—Stanley Schell 89

Three Naughty Kittens.—Isabel Frances Bellows 166

Timid Kitten.—Carolyn Wells 58

Tom.—M.T. Hart 252

Tommie 116

Toodlekins and Flip 265

Tootsy Wootsy.—Mrs. Frederick W. Pender 13

Topsy 85

Troll Cat 222

Turn About 79

Two Gray Kits and the Gray Kits’ Mother 71

Two Hearts and a Kitten.—Mabel Preece 203

Two Pussy-Cats.—Ella Wheeler Wilcox 105

“Two’s Company, Three’s None.”—Mrs. Frederick W. Pender 52

Ungrateful Cat 259

Walter Savage Landor’s Favorite Cat, Chinchinillo 134

Warning (Music) 114

Watch-Cat.—Elliot Walker 248

Way You Look at It 173

We Cats (Action Song) 60

We’ve Lost Our Job.—Stanley Schell 262

What Became of the Kitten? 175

What I Want.—David L. Proudfit 258

What Puss Thinks 33

“When the Cat’s Away the Mice Will Play”
(Tableau).—Mrs. Mary L. Gaddess 167

Where Are Those Sleepy Kittens? (Action Poem) 44

Where Have You Been? 73

Where Is My Kitty? (Action Poem) 99

Why Cats Wash After Eating.—Eva J. Beede 25

Why the Cat Always Falls upon Her Feet.—Louise Jamison 211

Wisdom 233

Wise Mouse.—Mary Raymond Garretson 31

* * * * *

Conundrums—25, 119, 123, 125, 142, 156, 157, 177, 179, 183, 193, 197, 198, 207, 210, 220, 227, 235, 251.

AUTHORS.

PAGE

Bates, Clara Doty 45

Baudelaire, Charles 115

Beede, Eva J. 25

Bellows, Isabel Frances 166

Boyd, Mary S. 140

Brown, Anna Robeson 129

Brown, Olive Stevens 104

Buckram, James 246

Campbell, Jane 135

Carlton, Will M. 126

Cassin, Elizabeth I. 24

Clark, Kate Upson 170

Coolidge, Susan 117

Corbett, Mrs. E.T. 206, 213

Corrothers, J.D. 72, 124

Cowper, William 236

Dayre, Sydney 199

Dumas, Alexander 94

Ewing, Jennie Pendleton 92

Field, Eugene 143

Ford, Harriet 161

Foss, Sam Walter 158

Foster, Edna A. 155

Frisbie, A.L. 257

Gaddess, Mrs. Mary L. 167

Garabraut, Nellie M. 209

Garretson, Mary Raymond 31

Gould, Elizabeth L. 102

Green, Joseph 261

Hammond, Maria J. 241

Hart, M.T. 252

Harte, Bret 138

Herford, Oliver 30, 184

Holway, Grace Bacon 35

Hood, Tom 87

Hutcheson, Helen Thayer 144

Jamison, Louise 211

Jerolamen, C. Grace 220

Jerome, Jerome K. 46

Jones, Mrs. Gertrude M. 27

Jones, Rosalie M. 20

King, Ben 78

Kish, A.C. 68

Larcom, Lucy 185

Lawless, Eve 34

Liddell, E. Louise 59

Lincoln, Joe 136

Marori 200

Mitchell, Elizabeth H. 41

Peck, Georgia A. 205

Pender, Mrs. Frederick W. 13, 52, 91, 120, 133, 176, 180, 196,
230, 271

Porter, Eleanor H. 188

Preece, Mabel 203

Proudfit, David L. 258

Randall, Herbert 70

Rosser, Flavia 198

Schell, Stanley 89, 153, 179, 194, 224, 240, 262

Southey, Robert 263

Stone, Mary Elizabeth 221

Stowe, Harriet Beecher 40

Street, L.E. 36

Taylor 121

Thaxter, Celia 141

Tisdale, Louis B. 171

Twain, Mark 244

Ulmer, Kate 208

Vandegrift, Margaret 75, 254

Vetrepont, Joy 151

Walker, Elliot 248

Wells, Carolyn 58

Westwood, Thomas 159

White, Fannie Rogers 106

Wilcox, Ella Wheeler 105

Wilkins, Mary E. 107

Wordsworth, William 122

CATS’ AND KITTENS’ OPENING ADDRESS.

Kind audience, we wish to say right here,
We’re only play cats and kittens dear.
(’Twould be absurd for cats to play
This entertainment, their parts they could not say),
For cats, you know, can only “me-you,”
And that we know is Greek to you.
Then, if a rat should chance to drop
Upon us, why, off we’d pop!
All this I tell you for your sake,
For fear you’d make a grave mistake,
And think that we real catties were.
I therefore ask you to suppose
That we are dressed up in cats’ clothes.

[_All bow, then all together give the following calls as they back to stage back and exit._]

[Music]

WERNER’S
READINGS AND RECITATIONS
No. 35.

Copyright, 1906, by Edgar S. Werner.

TOOTSY WOOTSY.

POEM, LESSON-TALK AND PANTOMIME, BY MRS. FREDERICK W. PENDER.

POSES BY BABY ELOCUTIONIST VIRGINIA BELL (2 YEARS OLD) AND KITTEN TOOTSY WOOTSY (4 MONTHS OLD).

Photographs by Jacques Joel, New York.

Copyright, 1906, by Edgar S. Werner.

_Written expressly for this book._

See, Tootsy Wootsy be’s m’ tat,
An’ her as tunnin’ as tan be;
She am ner bigger den m’ han’,
An’s dot der bites’ eyes oo’ see.

All fluffy wuffy be’s her toat,
An’ say, her face, it’s orsel wise;
I spec’s some day ’at she’ll dit
Der firstes’, bestes’ tind oo’ prize.

She puts her ’ittle velvet paws
Wite up ter me ser dem I’ll shake;
An’ ef she be’s des fas’ ersleep,
I nezzer ties fer her ter wake.

I ’dopt her fer m’ owners’ tat,
An’ dot fer her der nices’ house,
W’ere she do stay w’en nite am tum
Ser still an’ twiet as er mouse.

She ain’t ner tommon tind o’ tat,
She am Andora, yes, she be;
An’ w’en I smooth her back an’ tail,
Her winks, an’ purrs, an’ p’ays wiv me.

An’ nen I buy (now doan yo’ laff),
Er sing ner uzzer titten’s dot,
Er nussin’ bottle, wiv er mouf
F’um w’ich she dinks her milk w’en hot.

Oh! she do be ser very nice,
I hopes she nezzer wuns erway;
Fer ef she do, I tannot tell
W’at I ’oud do, or sink, or say.

Maybe, I mite dess tazy dit,
Ef f’um m’ titten I did part;
So, Tootsy, darlin’! oo’ stay here,
Fer ef yer don’ yo’ bwake m’ heart.

[Some people do not care to teach children dialect, so we print the poem “Tootsy Wootsy” in ordinary English. The same lesson-talk applies to both forms of the poem.]

TOOTSY WOOTSY.

See, Tootsy Wootsy is my cat,
And she’s as cunning as can be;
She is no bigger than my hand,
And has the brightest eyes you see.

All fluffy wuffy is her coat,
And see, her face, it’s very wise;
I expect some day that she’ll get
The first and only kind of prize.

She puts her little velvet paws
Right up to me so them I’ll shake;
And if she is just fast asleep,
I never cry for her to wake.

I take her for my very own
And have for her the nicest house,
Where she can stay when night is come
As still and quiet as a mouse.

She’s not a common kind of cat,
She is Angora, yes, she is;
And when I smooth her back and tail,
She winks, and purrs, and plays with me.

And then I buy (now don’t you laugh)
A thing no other kitten’s got,
A nursing-bottle, with a mouth
From which she drinks her milk when hot.

Oh! she is really very nice,
I hope she’ll never run away;
For if she does, I cannot tell
What I would do, or think, or say.

Maybe, I might just crazy get,
If from my kitten I did part;
So, Tootsy, darling! you stay here,
For if you don’t, you’ll break my heart.

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Cats and kittensChapter I: Front Matter

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