Chapter I: Front Matter

FANCY FREE

UNIFORM WITH THIS VOLUME

THE HUMAN BOY

ALSO BY THE SAME AUTHOR

LYING PROPHETS
CHILDREN OF THE MIST
SONS OF THE MORNING
THE STRIKING HOURS

PAGE 154]

FANCY FREE

BY
EDEN PHILLPOTTS

WITH EIGHT ILLUSTRATIONS

METHUEN & CO.
36 ESSEX STREET W.C.
LONDON
1901

TO
FRANCIS COWLEY BURNAND
WITH MOST HEARTY
REGARD

CONTENTS

PAGE

THE ZAGABOG 1

QUITE OUT OF THE COMMON 7

JOHNSON’S BOSWELL 61

THE NINE MUSKETEERS 78

THE GAME OF LIFE 94

“ALAS! POOR GHOST” 101

GREENSMITH’S CHARADE 120

THE MATE OF THE “BUNCH O’ KEYS” 136

THE TRANSMIGRATIONS OF TARVER 141

THE FIRST WORD 166

“STAR O’ BOSTON” 175

THE SACRIFICE 189

THE DIARY OF A PERFECT GENTLEMAN 196

INOCULATION DAY 210

A STORY WITHOUT AN END 221

THE BIOGRAPHY OF PETER PARKINSON 231

THE JACKY-TOAD 252

A CELESTIAL CHAT 271

THE ARCHDEACON AND THE DEINOSAURS 279

THE BILLS 297

LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS

PAGE

“BUT YOU’RE A POOR THING IN TIGERS” _J. A. Shepherd_ _Frontispiece_

“THEY’RE LITTLE GIRLS AND BOYS!” _S. H. Sime_ 5

“I LIFTED UP MY VOICE AND CALLED
FOR A POLICEMAN” _A. H. Buckland_ 44

“MR. GARRICK SURPRISED MR. BOSWELL” _Enoch Ward_ 72

“ASCENDED A HAND, LIKE THE SIGHT OF
LAND” _Arthur Layard_ 138

“‘OLD TOM RUM,’ READ OUT ‘STAR O’ BOSTON’” 181

“GORMED IF I DIDN’T THINK I’D GOT ’E!” _René Bull_ 253

“VERY PASSABLE IRISH WHISKY” _Cecil Aldin_ 288

FANCY FREE

THE ZAGABOG

I

Here’s a funny sort of story of an Isle beyond the sun,
Of a gleaming golden island seldom seen by anyone;
So prick your ears and listen to my most eccentric lays
Of the Island and the Zagabog from old pre-Cambrian days--
The mild and humble Zagabog,
The plain, good-hearted Zagabog
With prehistoric ways.

II

Upon his wondrous head he wore a rather ugly crown;
His eyes were green and somewhat sad, his tail hung meekly down;
But on a throne of early mud he comfortably sat
And ruled his Golden Island in a way I marvel at.
He was a peaceful Zagabog,
A practical old Zagabog,
And quite unique at that.

III

For Nature only made but one, though we shall never know
Why just a single Zagabog exhausted Nature so;
His subjects rose from trilobites, the newest of the new,
To other bygone beasts that leapt and swam and crawled and flew;
But all obeyed the Zagabog,
The good primeval Zagabog.
Which they were right to do.

IV

From periods ante-Primary he dated, as we know,
And with the greatest interest observed that wondrous show
Of shells and fish, of monstrous newts, of dragons on the wing;
Then chronicled the changes that the rolling ages bring,--
That scientific Zagabog,
That most observant Zagabog;
And he loved everything.