Chapter II: Part 2

The best mirror is an old friend.

--_Tennyson_.

True friendships are eternal.

--_Cicero_.

That two men may be real friends, they must have opposite opinions, similar principles, and different loves and hatreds.

--_Chateaubriand_.

There are very few friends with whom one can be intimate on all subjects. Discover the range of your intimacy with each friend and never go beyond it.

--_J. A. Spender_.

* * * * *

Two persons will not be friends long if they cannot forgive each other's little failings.

--_La Bruyere_.

There is this important difference between love and friendship: while the former delights in extremes and opposites, the latter demands equalities.

--_Mme. de Maintenon_.

There is no folly equal to that of throwing away friendship, in a world were friendship is so rare.

--_Bulwer-Lytton_.

The very ground and gist of a noble friendship is the cultivation in common of the personal inner lives of those who partake in it, their mutual reflection of souls and joint sharing of experience inciting them to a constant betterment of their being and their happiness.

* * * * *

Think of the importance of friendship in the education of men. It will make a man honest; it will make him a hero; it will make him a saint. It is the state of the just dealing with the just, the magnanimous with the magnanimous, the sincere with the sincere, man with man.

--_Thoreau_.

There are two elements that go to the composition of friendship--truth and tenderness.

--_Emerson_.

There are a thousand nameless ties,
Which only such as feel them know;
Of kindred thoughts, deep sympathies,
And untold fancy spells, which throw
O'er ardent minds and faithful hearts
A chain whose charmed links so blend,
That the light circlet but imparts
Its force in these fond words, _My friend_.

--_Mrs. Dinnies_.

* * * * *

We talk of choosing our friends, but friends are self-elected.

--_Emerson_.

Wanting to have a friend is altogether different from wanting to be a friend. The former is a mere natural human craving, the latter is the life of Christ in the soul.

--_J. R. Hitter_.

Whoever undertakes a friend's great part,
Should be renewed in nature, pure in heart,
Prepared for martyrdom, and strong to prove
A thousand ways the force of genuine love.

--_Cowper_.

A faithful friend is the true image of the Deity.

--_Napoleon_.

* * * * *

As I love nature, as I love singing birds, and gleaming stubble, and flowing rivers, and morning, and evening, and summer, and winter, I love thee, my friend.

--_Thoreau_.

* * * * *

A poet might sing you his sweetest of songs,
But this must the poet have known:
Of the heart whose love to you only belongs,
Whose strength would be spent to save you from wrongs
Of a soul knit to yours with the mightiest thongs,
And sing them for you alone!

An artist might paint you a picture fair;
That would equal the greatest known;
But the heart of a friend, to do and to dare,
To save you from sorrow, and trial, and care,
Is something an artist, paint he ever so rare,
Has never on canvas shown!

* * * * *

Ancient Menander accounted him happy that had but met the shadow of a true friend; verily he had reason to say so, especially if he had tasted of any; for truly, if I compare all the rest of my forepassed life, which, although I have, by the mere mercy of God, passed at rest and ease, and except the loss of so dear a friend, free from all grievous affliction, with an ever quietness of mind, as one that have taken my natural and original commodities in good payment, without searching any others; if, as I say, I compare it all unto the four years I so happily enjoyed the sweet company and most dear society of that worthy man, it is nought but a vapor, nought but a dark and irksome light.

I do but languish, I do but sorrow; and even those pleasures all things present me with, instead of yielding me comfort, do but redouble the grief of his loss. We were co-partners in all things. All things were with us at half; methinks I have stolen his part from him. I was so accustomed to be ever two, and so inured to be never single, that methinks I am but half myself.

--_Montaigne_.

* * * * *

A friend's bosom
Is the inmost cave of our own mind
Where we sit from the wide gaze of day
And from the all-communicating air.

--_Shelley_.

* * * * *

A generous friendship no cold medium knows,
Burns with one love, with one resentment glows;
One should our interests and our passions be,
My friend must hate the man that injures me.

--_Pope_.

* * * * *
A friend should bear his friend's infirmities.

--_Shakespeare_.

* * * * *

Be yourself, simple, honest, and unpretending, and you will enjoy through life the respect and love of friends.

--_Sherman_.

* * * * *

Do not trouble yourself much to get new things, whether clothes or friends. Turn the old; return to them.

--_Thoreau_.

* * * * *

A man can scarce allege his own merits with modesty, much less extol them; a man cannot sometimes brook to supplicate or beg; and a number of the like; but all these things are graceful in a friend's mouth which are blushing in a man's own.

--_Bacon_.

* * * * *

Come, friend, my fire is burning bright,
A fire's no longer out of place,
How clear it glows (there's frost tonight)
It looks white winter in the face.

Be mine the tree that feeds the fire,
Be mine, the sun knows when to set,
Be mine, the months when friends desire
To turn in here from cold and wet,

--_Constable_.

* * * * *

Eternal blessings crown my earliest friend,
And round his dwelling guardian saints attend;
Blest be that spot where cheerful guests retire
To pause from toil, and trim their evening fire;
Blest that abode where want and pain repair,
And every stranger finds a ready chair:
Blest be those feasts with simple plenty crowned,
With all the ruddy family around.

--_Goldsmith_.

* * * * *

But let us drink a merry toast,
Let's drink to now and here,
Good fellowship shall be our boast,
In either woe or cheer!
O'er joys we've had, why sorrow brew?
Why live in days gone past?
We'll drink to friends both old and new,
Just so our friends are fast.

--_Delaney_.

* * * * *

But oh, if grief thy steps attend,
If want, if sickness, be thy lot,
And thou require a soothing friend,
Forget me not! Forget me not!

--_Opie_.

* * * * *

We just shake hands at meeting
With many that come nigh;
We nod the head in greeting
To many that go by.
But welcome through the gateway
Our few old friends and true;
The hearts leap up and straightway
There's open house for you,
Old friends,
There's open house for you.

--_Massey_.

* * * * *

Beyond all wealth, honor, or even health, is the attachment we form to noble souls; because to become one with the good, generous, and true, is to become in a measure good, generous, and true ourselves.

--_Arnold_.

* * * * *

Be slow in choosing a friend, slower in changing.

--_Franklin_.

* * * * *

Convey thy love to thy friend, as an arrow to the mark, to stick there; not as a ball against the wall to rebound back to thee.

--_Francis Quarles_.

* * * * *

Ah, friend, let us be true
To one another! For the world which seems
To lie before us like a land of dreams,
So various, so beautiful, so new,
Hath really neither joy, nor love, nor light,
Nor certitude, nor peace, nor help for pain;
And we are here as on a darkling plain
Swept with confused alarms of struggle and flight,
Where ignorant armies clash by night.

--_Matthew Arnold_.

* * * * *

Friendship is power and riches a11 to me;
Friendship's another element of life;
Water and fire are not of more general use
To the support and comfort of the world
Than friendship to the being of my joy;
I would do everything to serve a friend.

--_Southerne_.

* * * * *

For every leaf the loveliest flower,
Which beauty sighs for from her bower--
For every star a drop of dew--
For every sun a sky of blue---
For every heart, a heart as true.

--_Bailey_.

* * * * *

Friendship receives its crown in marriage when love is mingled with admiration and respect.

* * * * *

Friendship, one soul in two bodies.

--_Pythagoras_.

* * * * *

Friendship! mysterious cement of the soul!
Sweet'ner of life, the solder of society!
I owe thee much. Thou hast deserved of me
Far, far beyond whatever I can pay.
Oft have I proved the labors of thy love,
And the warm efforts of the gentle heart
Anxious to please. O! when my friend and I
In some thick wood have wander'd heedless on,
Hid from the vulgar eye, and sat us down
Upon the sloping cowslip-covered bank,
Where the pure limpid stream has slid along,
In grateful errors through the under-wood,
Sweet murmurings, methought the shrill-tongued thrush
Mended his song of love; the sooty blackbird
Mellow'd his pipe, and soften'd every note;
The eglantine smell'd sweeter, and the rose
Assumed a dye more deep.
O! then the longest summer's day
Seem'd too, too much in haste: still the full heart
Had not imparted half: 'tis happiness
Too exquisite to last!

--_Blair_.

* * * * *

Friendship was given us by nature as the handmaid of virtues, and not as the companion of our vices.

--_Cicero_.

* * * * *

Friendships, like trees, bring forth fruit after their kind. Corrupt friendships, corrupt fruit; good friendship, good fruit.

--_Diggle_.

* * * * *

Friendship is usually treated by the majority of mankind as a tough and everlasting thing which will survive all manner of bad treatment. But this is an exceedingly great and foolish error; it may die in an hour of a single unwise word.

--_Ouida_.

* * * * *

Friendship is a vase, which when it is flawed by heat, or violence, or accident, may as well be broken at once; it can never be trusted after. The more graceful and ornamental it was, the more clearly do we discern the hopelessness of restoring it to its former state. Coarse stones, if they are fractured, may be cemented again; precious ones never.

--_Walter Savage Landor_.

* * * * *

Hand grasps hand, eye lights eye, in good Friendship.
And great hearts expand and grow one in the sense of this world's
life.

--_Browning_.

* * * * *

God never loved me in so sweet a way before;
'Tis he alone who can such blessings send;
And when His love would new expression find
He brought thee to me and He said, "Behold a friend."

* * * * *

Friendship is the wine of existence; love the dram-drinking.

--_Bulwer_.

* * * * *

He who has ceased to enjoy his friend's superiority, has ceased to love him.

--_Madame Swetckine_.

* * * * *

I thank Thee, Lord, for every moment dropped
Into my life that had some sweetness in it,
For all the golden hours when friendship met
And gave up heart for heart and thought for thought,
For all the love that faithful hearts let fall,
To drop into mine own; for every look
From loving eyes; for every smile or word
That gladdened me; for subtle influence
That made me strong, dear Lord, I thank Thee.

--_Pastor_.

* * * * *

I breathed a song into the air,
It fell to earth, I knew not where;
For who has sight so keen and strong,
That it can follow the flight of a song;

* * * * *

The song from beginning to end,
I found again in the heart of a friend.

--_Longfellow_.

* * * * *

I find no place that does not breathe
Some gracious memory of my friend.

--_Tennyson_.

* * * * *

I awake this morning with devout thanksgiving for my friends, the old and the new.

--_Emerson_.

* * * * *

I can only urge you to prefer friendship to all human possessions; for there is nothing so suited to our nature, so well adapted to prosperity or adversity.

--_Cicero_.

* * * * *

If any little love of mine
May make a life the sweeter,
If any little care of mine
May make a friend's the fleeter,
If any life of mine may ease
The burden of another,
God give me love and care and strength
To help my toiling brother.

* * * * *

If you have a friend worth loving,
Love him. Yes, and let him know
That you love him, ere life's evening
Tinge his brow with sunset glow;
Why should good words ne'er be said
Of a friend till he is dead?

--_Unknown_.

Old books, old wine, old Nankin blue,
All things, in short, to which belong
The charm, the grace that Time makes strong--
All these I prize, but (_entre nous_)
Old friends are best!

--_Austin Dobson_.

* * * * *

I never crossed your threshold with a grief
But that I went without it, never came
Heart hungry but you fed me,
And gave the sorrow solace and relief.

I never left you but I took away
The love that drew me to your side again,
Through the wide door that never could remain
Quite closed between us for a little day.

* * * * *

If you would be loved as a companion, avoid unnecessary criticism.

--_Sir Arthur Helps_.

* * * * *

If you have friends in adversity, stand by them.

--_Dickens_.

* * * * *

It is every man's duty to make himself profitable to mankind.

--_Seneca_.

* * * * *

If a man should importune me to give a reason why I loved him, I find it could no otherwise be expressed than by making answer: because it was he, because it was I.

--_Montaigne_.

* * * * *

Indifferent people can only wound you in heterogeneous parts, maim you in your arm or leg: but the friend can make no pass but at the heart itself.

--_Steele_.

* * * * *

Tell me, gentle traveler, who hast wandered through the world, and seen the sweetest roses blow, and brightest gliding rivers, of all thine eyes have seen, which is the fairest land? "Child, shall I tell thee where nature is more blest and fair? It is where those we love abide. Though that space be small, ample is it above kingdoms; though it be a desert, through it runs the river of Paradise, and there are the enchanted bowers."

--_Unknown_.

* * * * *

My coat and I live comfortably together. It has assumed all my wrinkles, does not hurt me anywhere, has moulded itself on my deformities, and is complacent to all my movements, and I only feel its presence because it keeps me warm. Old coats and old friends are the same thing.

--_Hugo_.

* * * * *

Judge not thy friend until thou standest in his place.

--_Rabbi Hillel_.

* * * * *

Let no man think he is loved by any man when he loves no man.

--_Epictetus_.

* * * * *

My friend peers in on me with merry
Wise face, and though the sky stay dim,
The very light of day, the very
Sun's self comes in with him.

--_A. C. Swinburne_.

* * * * *

O sweeter than the honey well,
Deep in the sweetest rose of June,
And all sweet things the tongue can tell
On clover-scented afternoon,
Is friendship that has lived for years
Through fortune, failure, and through tears.

Though he who wears it sacredly
Be swarted like the rafters are
That shelter him, eternity
May hold few jewels half so rare!
And God will find for such a friend
Some sweeter slumber in the end.

--_Botsford_.

* * * * *

Still, Love a summer sunrise shines,
So rich its clouds are hung,
So sweet its songs are sung.
And Friendship's but broad, common day,
With light enough to show
Where fruit with brambles grow;
With warmth enough to feed
The grain of daily need.

--_Unknown_.

* * * * *

Only--but this is rare--
When a beloved hand is laid in ours,
When jaded with the rush and glare
Of the interminable hours,
Our eyes can in another's eyes read clear,
When our world-deafened ear
Is by the tones of a loved voice caressed--
A bolt is shot back somewhere in our breast,
And a lost impulse of feeling stirs again.
The eye sinks inward, and the heart lies plain,
And what we mean, we say, and what we would, we know.

--_Arnold_.

* * * * *

Yes, we must ever be friends; and of all who offer you friendship,
Let me be the first, the truest, the nearest, the dearest.

--_Longfellow_.

* * * * *

The only danger in friendship is that it may end.

--_Thoreau_.

* * * * *

Of all the heavenly gifts that mortal men commend,
What trusty treasure in the world can countervail a friend?
Our health is soon decayed; goods, casual, light and vain;
Broke have we seen the force of power, and honor suffer stain.
In body's lust man doth resemble but base brute;
True virtue gets and keeps a friend, good guide of our pursuit.
Whose hearty zeal with ours accords in every case;
No term of time, no space of place, no storm can it deface.

--_Nicholas Grimoald_.

* * * * *

When we have fallen through story after story of our vanity and aspiration, and sit rueful among the ruins, then it is that we begin to measure the stature of our friends; how they stand between us and our own contempt, believing in our best.

--_Stevenson_.

* * * * *

Reason is the torch of friendship, judgment its guide, tenderness its aliment.

--_De Bonald_.

* * * * *

Some I remember and will ne'er forget
My early friends, friends of my evil day;
Friends in my mirth, friends in my misery too,
Friends given by God in mercy and in love;
My counsellors, my comforters, and guides;
My joy in grief, my second bliss in joy;
Companions of my young desires; in doubt
My oracles; my wings in high pursuit.
Oh, I remember, and will ne'er forget
Our meeting spots, our chosen sacred hours;
Our burning words that utter'd all the soul;
Our faces beaming with unearthly love;
Sorrow with sorrow sighing, hope with hope
Exulting, heart embracing heart entire.

--_R. Pollok_.

* * * * *

Some love the glow of outward show,
Some love mere wealth, and try to win it;
The house to me may lowly be,
If I but like the people in it!

What's all the gold that glitters cold,
When link'd to hard or haughty feeling?
Whate'er we're told, the nobler gold
Is truth of heart and manly dealing!

Then let them seek, whose minds are weak,
Mere fashion's smile, and try to win it;
The house to me may lowly be,
If I but like the people in it!

--_Swain_.

* * * * *
Talk not of wasted affection,
Affection never was wasted;
If it enrich not the heart of another,
Its waters returning
Back to their springs like the rain,
Shall fill them full of refreshment;
That which the fountain sends forth
Returns again to the fountain.

--_Longfellow_.

* * * * *

There is no greater bane to friendship than adulation, fawning, and flattery. For this vice should be branded under as many names as possible, being that of worthless and designing men, who say everything with a view of pleasing, and nothing with regard to truth. Now while hypocrisy in all things is blamable (for it does away with all judgment of truth, and adulterates truth itself), so especially is it repugnant to friendship, for it destroys all truth, without which the name of friendship can avail nothing.

--_Cicero_.

* * * * *

These things do not require to be spoken; there is something in the hand grip and the look in the eye that makes you know your man.

--_Chambers_.

* * * * *

The man who prefers his dearest friend to the call of duty will soon show that he prefers himself to his dearest friend.

--_Robertson_.

* * * * *

There is nothing like putting the shine on another's face to put the shine on our own. Nine-tenths of all loneliness, sensitiveness, despondency, moroseness, are connected with personal interests. Turn more of those selfish interests into unselfish ones, and by so much we change opportunities for disheartenment into their opposite. By a law of Nature part of her beautiful economy, he who lives most for others is really living most for himself.

--_Gannett_.

* * * * *

The foundation of that steadfastness and constancy which we seek in friendship, is sincerity. For nothing is steadfast which is insincere.

--_Cicero_.

* * * * *

The wise man seeks a friend in whom are those qualities which he himself may lack; for thus being united is their friendship the more completely defended against adversity.

--_Jeremy Taylor_.

* * * * *

The Swallow is a summer bird;
He in our chimneys, when the weather
Is fine and warm, may then be heard
Chirping his notes for weeks together.

Come there but one cold wintry day,
Away will fly our guest the Swallow:
And much like him we find the way
Which many a gay young friend will follow.

In dreary days of snow and frost,
Closer to Man will cling the Sparrow:
Old friends, although in life we're crost,
Their hearts to us will never narrow.

Give me the bird--give me the friend--
Will sing in frost--will love in sorrow--
Whate'er mischance to-day may send,
Will greet me with his sight to-morrow.

--_Lamb_.

* * * * *

True happiness consists not in the multitude of friends, but in the worth and choice. --_Dr. Johnson_.

* * * * *

The earth-born clod who hugs his idol pelf,
His only friends are Mammon and himself;
The drunken sots, who want the art to think,
Still cease from friendship when they cease from drink.
The empty fop who scarce for man will pass,
Ne'er sees a friend but when he views his glass.
Friendship first springs from sympathy of mind,
Which to complete the virtues all combine,
And only found 'mongst men who can espy
The merits of his friend without envy.
Thus all pretending friendship's but a dream,
Whose base is not reciprocal esteem.

--_Allan Ramsay_.

* * * * *

We grow by love. It is said, why live for others? But others are our nutriment.

--_Channing_.

* * * * *

There are no rules for friendship. It must be left to itself. We cannot force it any more than love.

--_Hazlitt_.

* * * * *

There are few subjects which have been more written upon, and less understood, than that of friendship. To follow the dictates of some, this virtue instead of being the messenger of pain becomes the source of every inconvenience. Such specialists, by expecting too much from friendship, dissolve the connection, and by drawing the bands too loosely at length break them. It is certain that the best method to cultivate this virtue, is by letting it, in some measure, make itself; a similitude of minds and of studies, and even sometimes a diversity of pursuits, will produce all the pleasures that arise from it. The current of tenderness widens as it proceeds; and two men imperceptibly find their hearts filled with good nature for each other, when they were at first only in pursuit of mirth or relaxation.

--_Oliver Goldsmith_.