Chapter LV: Phrenology

THE ESTATE “UNDER THE HAT”

PHRENOLOGY is that science which may be said to provide a chart or map for the discovery of the treasures existing in the “estate under the hat.” It is of Greek origin (_phren_, the mind; and _logos_, science), and is closely allied to craniology (Gr.: _kranion-logos_, skull-science).

The difference between these terms is as follows:--_Craniology_ is a mere acquaintance with the skull. _Phrenology_ is a full and detailed knowledge of its contents.

This study is not founded on superstition, and the phrenologist is neither charlatan nor magician, for, just as a man’s mind may be revealed by the contour of his features, the twitching or tightening of his lips, a frowning or smoothing of the brows, so the physical formation of his skull reveals the propensities, talents, virtues, and weaknesses peculiar to his nature. The thin leather of a bulging purse indicates an amount of coin; a closer observation demonstrates of what this coin is composed--cents, dimes, or dollars--and in the same way the skin of the skull bulges, and close study and knowledge of the locality of its developments show the various qualities endowed.

The student must possess a chart (Fig. 1), and memorize it before he essays to indicate character by means of phrenology, for its kingdoms are as well defined as the counties on a map.

There are forty-two faculties or organs in all--some more prominent than others, according to the disposition, temperament, education, profession, and personal inclination of the individual.

1. Amativeness
2. Conjugal love
3. Parental love
4. Friendship
5. Inhabitiveness
6. Continuity
7. Vitativeness
8. Combativeness
9. Destructiveness
10. Alimentiveness
11. Acquisitiveness
12. Secretiveness
13. Cautiousness
14. Approbativeness
15. Self-esteem
16. Firmness
17. Conscientiousness
18. Hope
19. Spirituality
20. Veneration
21. Benevolence
22. Constructiveness
23. Ideality
24. Sublimity
25. Imitation
26. Mirth
27. Individuality
28. Form
29. Size
30. Weight
31. Color
32. Order
33. Calculation
34. Locality
35. Eventuality
36. Time
37. Tune
38. Language
39. Causality
40. Comparison
41. Human nature
42. Suavity

These may be divided into six important classes:--

1. _The social region_, which includes--

A. _Amativeness._--Normal--interest in and love for the opposite sex.
Too prominent--material. Too small--coldness and indifference.

B. _Conjugal affection._--Normal--constant and faithful love. Too
prominent--jealous and selfish. Too small--fickle and inconstant
fancy.

C. _Parental love._--Normal--self-abnegating love for children. Too
prominent--indiscreet monopolizing. Too small--absence of tenderness.

D. _Friendship._--Normal--sociability, warm attachments. Too
prominent--too exacting, infatuations. Too small--inability to make
friends.

E. _Inhabitiveness._--Normal--love of home and native land. Too
prominent--intense dislike to travel. Too small--a desire for constant
change of scenery.

F. _Continuity._--Normal--the power of concentration. Too
prominent--the prevalence of one idea, self-centered. Too small--lack
of concentration.

2. _The selfish propensities_--

A. _Vitativeness._--Normal--vitality, joy of living. Too
prominent--extreme dread of illness and death. Too small--callous of
calamity.

B. _Combativeness._--Normal--courageous, antagonistic instincts. Too
prominent--quarrelsome. Too small--want of mettle, cowardly.

C. _Destructiveness._--Normal--hardness and durability. Too
prominent--vindictive. Too small--lack of interest, inability to
endure pain or misfortune.

D. _Alimentiveness._--Normal--good and healthy appetite. Too
prominent--gluttony, fastidiousness. Too small--want of appetite.

E. _Acquisitiveness._--Normal--thrift and economy. Too
prominent--avarice. Too small--extravagant, a spendthrift.

F. _Secretiveness._--Normal--reserve, tact, discretion. Too
prominent--deceit, intrigue, falsehood. Too small--indiscreet
revelations, thoughtlessness.

G. _Cautiousness._--Normal--apprehension, prudent care. Too
prominent--timid, over-anxious. Too small--reckless, foolhardy.

3. _Self-controlling faculties_--

A. _Approbativeness._--Normal--appreciation of public opinion,
courtesy, manners, good breeding. Too prominent--ostentatious,
“playing to the gallery,” undue love of adulation. Too small--ignoring
of general opinions, unconventional.

B. _Self-esteem._--Normal--individuality, personality, a proper sense
of personal importance and ability. Too prominent--conceit, egoism,
tyranny. Too small--sense of inability and incompetency.

C. _Firmness._--Normal--will-power, assertion of self, determination,
fortitude. Too prominent--overbearing, perverse, illogical. Too
small--inability to concentrate or overcome.

4. _Moral sentiments_--

A. _Conscientiousness._--Normal--high regard for honor and duty. Too
prominent--morbid hypersensitiveness. Too small--want of principle.

B. _Hope._--Normal--optimistic trust and buoyancy. Too
prominent--foolish disregard of experience. Too small--an inclination
to despair, sad and melancholy.

C. _Spirituality._--Normal--trust, faith, religious, devout,
reverential. Too prominent--fanaticism. Too small--cynicism.

D. _Veneration._--Normal--chivalry towards the old, admiration for the
great, modest, quiet demeanor. Too prominent--obsession. Too
small--disrespectful, irreverent.

E. _Benevolence._--Normal--philanthropic inclinations, humane,
charitable, generous. Too prominent--imprudent giving, waste of
sympathy. Too small--selfish blindness and indifference.

5. _Intellectual faculties_--

A. _Individuality._--Normal--a desire for knowledge, respect and
regard for the feelings of others. Too prominent--over-curious,
spying. Too small--lack of humor.

B. _Form._--Normal--ability to remember faces, shapes, and general
appearance of buildings, &c. Too prominent--sensitiveness to want of
beauty and contour. Too small--inability to observe shapes carefully.

C. _Size._--Normal--the power of judging proportions at a glance. Too
prominent--too much sense of comparison. Too small--incapable of
judging length and breadth.

D. _Weight._--Normal--mechanical and mathematical inclinations. Too
prominent--great regard for the laws of balance and gravity. Too
small--awkward movements, want of harmony.

E. _Color._--Normal--the art of blending colors, delight in nature.
Too prominent--hypersensitive of uncongenial environment; the clashing
of colors is torture. Too small--a want of artistic sensibility,
taste, and appreciation; perhaps color-blind.

F. _Order._--Normal--ability to plan, to arrange, to discover the best
method for doing business, &c. Too prominent--prim, fussy, fastidious,
the mind obsessed by little things; extremely fretted by want of
method in others. Too small--slovenly, chaotic, Bohemian; duties
performed or left according to mood and inclination.

G. _Calculation._--Normal--the power of mental arithmetic, the summing
up of events. Too prominent--self-interest, any kind action done for
the sake of some return, cold, distrustful. Too small--financial
imprudence, inability to make accounts balance.

H. _Locality._--Normal--swift sense of strange surroundings, an
observation of streets and buildings. Too prominent--a passion for
explorations. Too small--want of observation of new things.

I. _Eventuality._--Normal--interest in present events. Too
prominent--undue regard for trivial incidents. Too small--inability to
remember recent events.

J. _Time._--Normal--memory of periods and length of time, love of
punctuality. Too prominent--inordinate importance attached to dates,
&c. Too small--slackness in punctuality.

K. _Tune._--Normal--sense of euphony in speech, harmony in music. Too
prominent--passionate love of music. Too small--want of appreciation.

L. _Language._--Normal--fluent and attractive speech. Too
prominent--prosy, garrulous. Too small--inability to express thoughts
clearly and concisely.

6. _Reasoning faculties_--

A. _Causality._--Normal--power of fathoming and understanding what is
read or heard. Too prominent--theoretical knowledge rather than
practical. Too small--deficiency in arriving at independent
conclusions.

B. _Comparison._--Normal--acquiring of sound knowledge and discarding
what is worthless; discriminating between what is true in art and
literature and what is false. Too prominent--undue importance attached
to words, carping criticism, invidious, harsh. Too small--credulous,
easily imposed upon.

The student will at first find considerable difficulty in determining the exact position of the different faculties. It is only by close study of his chart, practice on human heads, and experience, that he will at length achieve unerring ability to distinguish, blend, and separate the different characters, inclinations, intellects, and emotions with which the human mind is gifted.

BALD-PATED FRIENDS

In case the would-be phrenologist is not possessed of an amiable, bald-headed relation, he should endeavor to ingratiate himself in the favors of a hairless friend, for there is nothing so excellent for practice as a thatchless skull. Indeed, he is fortunate who has a large circle of bald-pated friends and acquaintances, for, even if he dare not attempt to find out their qualities by the sense of touch, he may achieve much by observation.

Women’s heads are the most difficult to examine, and never should the student exhibit his art on the well-coiffured damsel. There deception lies, for what seems to him an abnormal development of “bumps” will in all probability be artificial pads used by the fair one to discipline her tresses into fashion’s latest erection, to say nothing of hairpins and many other mysteries which the mind of a man, be he ever so learned in phrenology, can never hope to fathom.

The woman who is really curious to have her faculties read must consent to unpin her locks, so that the hand of the phrenologist may come in contact with her head; and he must possess a sensitive touch, which quickly discerns the different developments of the skull.

PHRENOLOGIST--AND MAN!

Students of phrenology will be astonished to find what a great deal of information may be gained by means of careful observation, when actual investigation is impossible. No opportunity should be lost of studying shape, poise, and balance of the human head. From the temples and brows of the man occupying the same seat on an omnibus a great deal is to be learnt, in spite of his headgear; the faculties 1, 2, 3, 5, 7, 9, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 32, 33, and 35 will probably protrude, and demonstrate what degree of love of form, size, individuality, eventuality, alimentiveness, destructiveness, vitativeness, conjugality, and amativeness exist in his nature.

Churches, concert rooms, and theaters abound with opportunities for the scrutiny of masculine heads, and upon each is engraved those abstract qualities furnished by the memorized chart.

The phrenologist should take pains to keep his hands and nails perfectly clean. He should bathe them between each experiment, as the natural grease of the hair soils them, and no one likes to have his skull touched by unclean fingers. It is essential for him to possess and cultivate a buoyant disposition, which will tend to help and encourage him, and not to condemn a subject for the weaknesses of character he discovers.

Few ills have no cure. This is as true of mental inefficiency as of physical ailments, and the prophecies of the humane phrenologist are set in the major and not the minor key. Every individual, however seemingly worthless or uninteresting, possesses some divine gift, which perhaps lies dormant and neglected through his ignorance of its existence. Here it is that the phrenologist is able to let a chink of light penetrate the darkness, and a few kind, judicious words will do much to bring back the latent self-respect to him who has despaired of being released from the fetters of evil habits, intemperance, sloth, or indifference to the liberty of wholesome well-being.

The motto of the student should be never to condemn. When he has once reached the secret of identity, he should set himself to appeal and rouse the dying spirit of manhood to a new resurrection of power and achievement, for probably adverse and bitter circumstances, heredity, and poverty have done much to batter down the higher nature and develop the baser qualities of the man whose faculties he examines; and he can only dimly imagine, but never fathom, the strength of the temptations that warp the various molds in which the human mind is set.

THE HUMOROUS SIDE OF PHRENOLOGY

In drawing-room exhibitions, only the lighter side of phrenology should be dealt with. A fund of humor and wit can be demonstrated here, so that instruction is blended with amusement, and it is not unfitting to use animals as illustrations of different qualities. For instance, the refrain in the once-popular lyric, “But the cat came back,” clearly testifies that this animal possessed the nodosity of inhabitiveness to a marked degree. Not so the man of music-hall fame whose pathetic pleading, “Please don’t take me home,” stirs our heartstrings most potently, or “Bill Bailey,” the wanderer. The small dog that ogles a larger comrade engaged with a bone, but who fears his mightier powers too greatly to venture open attack, possesses “cupboard” affection rather than amativeness.

The blinkered horse, were it granted speech, would doubtless demonstrate the fact that it has cultivated the faculty of spirituality in no small degree, for its sense of the unseen is remarkable.

The bull has only to kick up his heels and lower his horns at a red parasol to vindicate his apt discernment of color. The manner in which the watch-dog registers the shape of his enemy’s calves in his memory is a truly astonishing sign of his sense of form and locality. The serpent’s feline smile at the bird is eloquent of its sociability and expectation; its glistening coils are the personification of blandness and invitation to embrace. Stay-at-home oysters are famous for domesticity. The fish swallowing the hooked worm illustrates a beautiful trust and faith in the providential plans man culminates for his welfare. In the hobbled ass, wandering over and over his patch of grass, economy, adhesiveness, and a very praiseworthy amount of application are shown.

It might be well for the ambitious phrenologist to study the skulls of these and other animals, birds, and fishes, for in these the unadulterated essences of virtues and vices and instinctive propensities are discovered. The human head may be likened to a very rich pudding composed of very different ingredients, flavorings, and strata of coloring, and sugared with conventionalities and hypocrisies. The animal, on the contrary, exhibits its true qualities as frankly as a sirloin of raw beef suspended in a butcher’s window.