Chapter I: Front Matter

MEMORIES OF MY LIFE

MEMORIES OF MY LIFE
_Being my Personal, Professional, and Social Recollections as Woman and
Artist_

_By_
SARAH BERNHARDT

D. APPLETON AND COMPANY
NEW YORK MCMVII

COPYRIGHT, 1907, BY
D. APPLETON AND COMPANY

_Published October, 1907_

CONTENTS

CHAPTER I
MY AUNTS
PAGE

My mother and her sisters—The “mask of butter”—The beauty of my
mother—Away with my nurse—Life in a _concierge’s_ lodge—My
aunt comes for me—An accident—I must go to school—Off for
Auteuil—Mme. Fressard and her boarding school—I am left
alone—Life at the _pension_—My schoolmates—Back to Aunt
Rosine—My father and Rossini—My disagreeable Aunt Faure—My
delightful Uncle Faure 1–16

CHAPTER II
I BEGIN MY CONVENT LIFE
Grandchamps Convent—My terror of the cloister—The lovely Mother
Superior—The dormitory—The garden—Farewell to my father—My
new schoolmates—Compulsory soup—The despised and the beloved
Sister—Pets and playthings—I rescue a playmate—Preparations
for the archbishop’s visit—The play in which I was not given
a part—My failure as a costumer—How I got a
part—Monseigneur’s arrival—The performance—The tragedy of
Monseigneur Sibour—My father dies—I am baptized and confirmed 17–38

CHAPTER III
A PRANK AND ITS RESULTS
In the Pyrénées—Goat-herding and vacation joys—Back to the
convent—The Croizettes—A soldier in the convent—How I shocked
the nuns—“The Angel Raphael” and César—A night of horror—I
leave the convent forever—My ambition 39–47

CHAPTER IV
IN FAMILY COUNCIL ASSEMBLED
A fateful day—Day-dreams and music lessons—The woes of making
my toilet—The assembling of the family—The obnoxious
notary—The council—My religious aspirations—My hopes are
quenched—The Duc de Morny’s advice—My memory of Rachel—My
fate is decided—The views of the family—I am introduced to
the theater—My first play and its strange effect upon me 48–60

CHAPTER V
I RECITE “THE TWO PIGEONS”
Plans for my career—The director of the _Conservatoire_—I study
for the examination—The rules of M. Meydieu—Learning
_Aricie_—The examination day—Dressing for the ordeal—I recite
a fable—The result—How I announced it—The family rejoices 61–74

CHAPTER VI
I DECLINE MATRIMONY AND WED ART
The awakening of a will—An offer of marriage—I am forced to
condemn a gentleman to death—I win a prize—I go for an
engagement—The embarrassment of having a naughty small
sister—I lose the engagement—I find encouragement in M.
Doucet—My lessons—Fencing and elocution—Tribulations with a
coiffeur—I enter a competition—The prize I did not win—My
rival—Legends that defy history—An humiliating homecoming—The
offer of another engagement—An interview at the Théâtre
Français and its happy outcome—My aunt has a celebration 75–97

CHAPTER VII
I MAKE MY DÉBUT AND EXIT
My first rôle—The first rehearsal—Troubles with the
costumer—The arraying of _Iphigénie_—The make-up shop—The
approach of the first night—I suffer the horrors of stage
fright—“_Quand-même_”—The début—New rôles—The disastrous
results of taking my sister to a ceremony—The arrogance of a
manager—I am cheated of a part and cancel my engagement 98–110

CHAPTER VIII
CASTLES IN SPAIN
Broken plans—I receive a new offer—I interview the manager of
the Gymnase—I make a new engagement—An idiotic rôle in an
imbecile play—I determine to kill myself—The allurement of
Spain distracts me—I follow my star—Sardou and my letter of
resignation—Marseilles and the sea—At Alicante—The night
intruder—Gala days at Madrid—Back to Paris—My mother’s
illness—I settle down by myself 111–123

CHAPTER IX
I RETURN TO THE STAGE
Fate drives me back to the theater—New fields at the Porte
Saint Martin—The disadvantages of being thin—New prospects—An
appointment and a contract—A death and another début—Success
at the Odéon—I appear as the chorus—Happy days—George
Sand—The disciples of Victor Hugo disapprove of Dumas’s
“Kean”—I succeed in spite of a hideous costume—François
Coppée and “Le Passant”—The triumph of “Le Passant”—Our
summons to the Tuileries—A rehearsal before imperial
spectators—Empress Eugénie’s feet—Fêted by an Emperor and a
Queen 124–145

CHAPTER X
IN FIRE AND WAR
My student adorers—I meet with some curious criticism—Gloomy
presentiments—My apartments are burned—Saving my
grandmother—Ruin and devastation—My benefit—Patti sings for
me—My new home—Discomfort and worry—The delayed insuring—Kind
words from friends—An insulting proposition—Evil days—Rumors
of war—The nineteenth of July—I am taken from Paris—War
news—Success of the German arms—I return to Paris under
difficulties—I come across a relative—Into the siege 146–164

CHAPTER XI
I ESTABLISH MY WAR HOSPITAL
Paris in war times—My _ambulance_ at the Odéon—The changes
brought by war—Getting supplies—The Prefect’s coat—The lady
of the Palais de l’Industrie—Provisions for my hospital—My
hospital staff—Heroines of the siege—Cowards and
heroes—Christmas 165–177

CHAPTER XII
MORE HOSPITAL DAYS
Sufferings from cold and hunger—Struggles for food and fuel—The
bombardment of the city—The ravages of fighting—The
wounded—The _ambulance_ is fired upon—The bargaining of the
children—Toto—The inventor of balloons—The burial of the
_maigrotte_—I receive news from my family—The horrors of
night-time—My fowls—The end of the siege 178–194

CHAPTER XIII
A WARTIME JOURNEY
I find a companion for my flight from Paris—We start on our
journey—Trouble at the city gates—Unwelcome acquaintances—The
young cripple—A tedious railway trip—A German inn—Crowded out
of a hotel—We find shelter—Some wounded admirers and a dead
adorer—The cry of the woman—We start on again 195–206

CHAPTER XIV
HOMBOURG AND RETURN
At the station—German insolence—The crowd in the railway
carriage—The surgeon major who was bound to smoke—We are
wrecked—A dismal prospect—A dreary search for shelter—The
wheelwright’s colt—Expensive hospitality—I turn cook—Crossing
a battlefield by night—The robbers of the dead—The capture of
a thief—Rest at Cateau—Confusion at Cologne—German
kindness—How I make myself sleep—We arrive at Hombourg and
start back again for Paris—Home again 207–226

CHAPTER XV
THE COMMUNE AND VICTOR HUGO
Paris after the war—Gambetta, Rochefort, and Paul de
Rémusat—One man’s delicacy of mind—A cowardly Prefect of
Police and his revenge—The Commune—Captain O’Connor—Paris in
ruins—Back to the theater—“Jean-Marie”—My success grows—My
mistaken opinion of Victor Hugo—The queen and her
valet—Victor Hugo improvises—Victor Hugo’s
kindness—Rehearsals of “Ruy Blas”—A Parisian first night and
what it meant to me—Victor Hugo’s homage 227–240

CHAPTER XVI
I LEAVE THE ODÉON
The night of the triumph—A talk with the “Master”—A forgotten
luncheon—How I feel when I receive a letter—Overtures from
the Comédie Française—Managerial interference—Perrin of the
Comédie—I sign a new contract—I lose a lawsuit—Victor Hugo’s
supper—The death of M. Chilly—Mamma Lambquin’s premonitions 241–253

CHAPTER XVII
I RETURN TO THE COMÉDIE FRANÇAISE
My happy memories of the Odéon—I return to an old
battle-ground—A _Marquise_ who was too stout—M. Sarcey’s
account of my début—The reason I was frightened—What happened
to my mother—A strange distribution of rôles—My growing
popularity and my delight in playing jokes—Sophie Croizette
as a rival—I turn my energies to sculpture—The clash of the
“Croizettists” and the “Bernhardtists”—A fight for the
moon—Success in “Le Sphinx”—A childish freak of
temperament—_Zaïre_ triumphs—I learn something useful about
my acting 254–267

CHAPTER XVIII
A HOLIDAY AND NEW SUCCESSES
A period of sculpturing—My success in making busts—My coffin—A
superfluous hearse—A holiday in Bretagne—The delights of the
shore—Painting in the country—“L’Enfer du Plogoff”—Into the
abyss—“The eyes of the shipwrecked ones”—“Sarah Bernhardt’s
chair”—The fête of Racine—I play the rôle of _Phedre_—A
tangle of authors and an actress—Unforeseen success—My new
hôtel 268–282

CHAPTER XIX
BUSY DAYS
Alexandre Dumas, _fils_—A quarrel and a reconciliation—The
partisans stir up more trouble—“L’Etrangère”—The grandmother
of the sea—More sculpturing—A long search for a model—The
missing hands and feet—Criticism of my group—Appeasing the
god of the _bourgeois_—Luncheon with Victor
Hugo—“Hernani”—The tear of Victor Hugo 283–293

CHAPTER XX
A BALLOON ASCENSION
“The Young Girl and Death”—How my energetic versatility aroused
indignation—I accept an invitation to go ballooning—A trip
through the clouds—Dinner among the stars—The
descent—Vachère—The journey back to Paris—A storm of
criticism—I send in my resignation and then withdraw it—A
trip to the south—A sale in the open—A ridiculous Othello—Mr.
Jarrett, _impresario_—I agree to do independent acting in
London—More trouble with the Committee—The _Times_ makes an
announcement—The end of disputes 294–307

CHAPTER XXI
MY LONDON DÉBUT
Our ridiculous preparations for departure—“La Quenelle,” who
adored me, and his life-preserver—A carpet of flowers—We find
the Prince of Wales has departed—My welcome and the
journalists—Visitors—Hortense Damian and her “_Chic_
commandments”—My shortcomings as a recipient of
kindnesses—London hospitality—Rotten Row and the Avenue des
Acacias—My first experience as a _traqueuse_—Trying my
voice—My fright—My début—What the critics thought of me 308–321

CHAPTER XXII
MY STAY IN ENGLAND
I overtax my strength—Outwitting the doctor—The effect of a
dose of opium—A lapse of memory and the talk it
caused—Dumas’s judgment of his own plays—I exhibit my
statues—Mr. Gladstone and “Phedre”—The success of my
exhibition—A jaunt to Liverpool—I hunt for lions—My new
pets—My homecoming creates a sensation—A Bedlam in Chester
Square—How I suffered from the press—The tranquil lady—The
company opens a campaign against me—My letter to M. Wolff—I
hesitate on the brink of leaving the Comédie 322–337

CHAPTER XXIII
I AGAIN LEAVE THE COMÉDIE FRANÇAISE
The cruelties of publicity—My first interview with a reporter—A
victim of caricaturists—Perrin tells me my faults—An
anonymous threat—My reappearance in Paris—An intoxicating
triumph—The discourtesy of actors—Coquelin, Mounet-Sully,
Bartet, Réjane, and Duse—Trying times—“L’Aventurière”—An
unjust attack—I send in my resignation—Cruel slanders—Mr.
Jarrett offers a new proposition—I prepare for an American
tour—The sad story of my costume for “Phedre”—The Comédie
brings suit against me—The financial record of my London
performances—Another visit to London—I overcome the critics 338–354

CHAPTER XXIV
PREPARATIONS FOR AMERICA
Coquelin deserts me—The charm of London—Brussels and
Copenhagen—A Danish triumph—A visit to Elsinore—I am
decorated by the King—An international supper with
international complications—The fickleness of Fame—My
farewell reception at Paris—Duquesnel proves himself my
friend—A triumphant tour of France—I sign a contract with the
“Vaudeville”—I leave Paris 355–367

CHAPTER XXV
MY ARRIVAL IN AMERICA
The gnome-haunted ship—I embark on
_L’Amérique_—Homesickness—The widow of President Lincoln—A
snowstorm in mid-ocean—The steerage passengers—A child is
born in the steerage—What if the emigrants should
mutiny?—Precautions in case of shipwreck—The Promised Land of
the emigrants—My fête day—The harbor of the New World—How I
was welcomed—A fatiguing reception—Rest under compulsion—The
kind of man Mr. Jarrett was—Another reception—The silly
questions of the reporters—Press agents and slander 368–385

CHAPTER XXVI
NEW YORK AND BOSTON
I go to Booth’s Theater for the first rehearsal—The crowd at
the stage door—The customs officers come to examine my
trunks—The treatment of my costumes—The Brooklyn Bridge—I
settle with the Board of Customs—I make my first appearance
in “Adrienne Lecouvreur”—I am serenaded—“La Dame aux
Camélias”—My sister impersonates me—The journey to Menlo
Park—I am entertained in fairyland by Mr. Edison—Mr. Edison
and Napoleon I.—We start for Boston—Boston women—An
extraordinary personage—My apartments—A curious experience
with a whale 386–401

CHAPTER XXVII
I VISIT MONTREAL
“Hernani” in Boston—Feminine intellectuality—The whale follows
me to New Haven—Attentions from the showman—I start for
Canada—My entry into Montreal—A cordial welcome—A greeting
from a poet—I cause a sensation by fainting—My rescuer and
his tragedy—The Bishop of Montreal condemns me—Ottawa and the
Iroquois—The Montreal students—An adventure on the ice 402–414

CHAPTER XXVIII
MY TOUR OF THE WESTERN STATES
Springfield and Springfield audiences—I inspect Colt
guns—Baltimore—Philadelphia and Chicago—A pleasant sojourn—A
visit to the slaughtering house—Another bishop condemns
me—St. Louis—The fish without eyes—My jewels are exhibited—It
nearly results in a tragedy—The attempted robbery—The man who
would have robbed me 415–427

CHAPTER XXIX
FROM THE GULF TO CANADA AGAIN
Cincinnati and then South—Crossing the Mississippi in
flood-time—A brave engineer—The charm of New Orleans—The
horrors of the flood—The hairdresser and the serpents—A
strange reception at Mobile—“La Dame aux Camélias” under
scenic difficulties—A round of smaller towns—Blocked by the
snow—A snow ball fight—Pittsburg and a former friend—A long
ride—A mistaken reporter 428–440