Chapter III: Part 3

Still, still his bell-like voice rings through my head;
Yet not one bright thought cheers my mental view;
O! would that I were deaf, asleep, or dead!
Ye marble statues! how I envy you!

* * * * *

To hear him preach the Methodistic creed,
What eager crowds to Ranter's chapel speed!
His eloquence the harden'd sinner frightens;
Like heaven itself--says Fame, he thunders, lightens.
I go to hear him;--Fame has made a blunder;--
I see no lightning, though I hear the thunder.

For flowery sermons Doctor Drudge
Of preachers at the top is;--
If from their influence we may judge,
His flowers are only poppies.

* * * * *

Sir! you're both fool and knave!--to Frank, Blunt cries--
I know I am, Sir, Frank to Blunt replies:--
Now, in self-knowledge if all knowledge lies,
A fool, like Frank, must be extremely wise!

* * * * *

Vice is a mouse-trap, pleasure is the bait,
Like mice, enticing mortals to their fate;
And of this truth experience leaves no doubt;--
'Tis far more easy to get in than out.

Old maids their spleen on marriage vent;--
The reason would you know?
'Tis not, that others are made wives,
But that they can't be so.

* * * * *

How grave he looks! how mighty wise!--
He seems Minerva's sacred bird:--
He speaks! our ears refute our eyes--
The cackling of a goose is heard.

* * * * *

How came that Jew, deform'd and old,
To wed the youthful, fair Coquette?--
Ben had a purse well-stored with gold!
He caught her in't;--'twas Hymen's net!
Flirtilla's teeth, well-form'd and white,
Were Hymen's pincers, and could bite!
When the Royal Exchange to the flames fell a prey,
All the Monarchs and Queens from their niches were thrown;
Lackaday! on the pavement in fragments they lay,
Every one except Charley the Second alone.
Strange event! O my Muse! to blind mortals below
Clear this mystery which none but immortals can know.
"Cytherea and Momus pray'd Vulcan to spare
The blithe, amorous King:--Vulcan granted their prayer."

H. MERRIDEW, PRINTER, COVENTRY.