Chapter VIII: Act V: Scene, the palace of the Duchess. Enter RENE and the LOVELY

NIECE.

RENE. "The hounds of justice are laying for me just outside the door. Fly with me, my beloved!" (_Enter the_ DUCHESS.)

DUCHESS. "She will not fly if I am at all acquainted with myself. Gyurll, this fellow murdered my son, and I will give him up to justice." (_Enter_ COURT PHYSICIAN.)

COURT PHYSICIAN. "Your Grace is mistaken. True, your son lay dead for a month or two, but by a judicious application of four dozen bottles of my "Universal Hair Restorer and Consumption Cure," he has recovered. Here he comes."

DUCHESS. "'Tis he! 'Tis my son, though rather thin about the legs. RENE, I forgive you. Marry the gyurrll if you wish. Bless you, my children." _Curtain_.

FIRST USHER. "Go round, somebody, and wake the people up. If you don't, they'll sit here and snore all night"

SECOND USHER. "No they won't. They'll wake up, now the play is over."

And the event proves that he is right. Slowly and gapingly the audience arises, strolls sleepily out of the door, and entering wrong stages, is carried to all manner of wrong destinations. So strong is the soporific influence of the Phillipic drama, that not until hours after the play is over, does the average spectator become sufficiently wakeful to express an intelligible regret that Mr. WALLER and Mrs. MOLLENHAUER should not have made their reappearance on the stage in some drama in which they could have had an opportunity to act, and in which the public could have taken some little interest.

MATADOR.

* * * * *

OUR FILTHY LUCRE.

Messrs. BROCKWAY, brewers, have lately been subjected to law process for the impropriety of "cleansing" revenue stamps connected with the ale business, with the view of using them over again.

In one point of view there seems to have been a hardship in the case referred to. Millions of people are daily occupied in dirtying our lovely currency stamps, as well as in "using them over again," and yet nobody has ever been "brought up" for the diabolical act.

* * * * *

INTERESTING TO INVESTOR.

Weekly meetings are being held by the Department of Docks, to hear suggestions from inventors. It is expected, of course, that the latter will be willing to be tried by their Piers.

* * * * *

THIS IS A YOUNG MAN GETTING READY FOR A PARTY.

AND THIS IS A PARTY GETTING READY FOR A YOUNG MAN.]

* * * * *

SOCIETY, ETC.

It is rather a pleasing recreation, when no other is at hand, to read the letters of some of the New York correspondents who do the heavy Trite and the small Horrible for the outside barbaric folios. Standing on the shore of their Firth of Froth, so to speak, we watch with considerable interest the unique soarings and divings of "Our Own." One of these writers informs the readers of a Boston paper that "There is a great deal of business talent in New York," and that "There is a great deal of what is called fashionable society in New York." _There_ is wisdom in solid chunks. It is highly important that such facts as these should be stated seriously in State street and be conned in Beacon street. "Our Own," be it remembered, is speaking of the "Tone of Society," and he proceeds to remark, with great pertinence, that in our unfortunate city, "There is a coarse, rude, uncivil way of doing business, so general as to attract attention. If you do not take a hack at the impertinent solicitation of the driver, he will unquestionably curse you." "The telegraph operator grabs your message and eyes you as if you were a pickpocket." Now, Mr. PUNCHINELLO does not offer himself as an apologist for the abusive and obstreperous hackman, but he wishes to say that in the course of his active and eventful career he has had various conferences with those servants of the sidewalk, and he has never yet been unquestionably cursed by any one of the whole bad lot. Only yesterday he had occasion to intimate to one of these tide-waiters, that vehicular aid was not desired. There was a merry twinkle in the eye of the Rejected, and he added, as an additional persuader, "Baggage Smashed!" Mr. PUNCHINELLO felt gratified at sincerity in an unexpected direction.

"Our correspondent" is also exercised on the old-time grievance of ladies in the horse-cars. He declares that "It is the rarest thing in the world for a New York lady to return the slightest acknowledgement for a seat tendered to her. She takes the seat as if it were her right, _and gives the gentleman a withering look for his impertinence in being in it when she entered_."

PUNCHINELLO has been more fortunate. He has been crowded by sitters, and punched with umbrellas; his eloquent nose has been offended by filthy straw, full often, in his Avenue travel, until he hopes fervently that we may have a new method of getting up and down town; it isn't pleasant to be _knocked_ down; but he has never yet been _withered_.

Oh, no. He does not require a lady to genuflect before him to show her appreciation of a gentlemanly act. Mr. PUNCHINELLO, being a gentleman of the old school, and of several colleges and universities, is quite satisfied by a nod and a smile, or "Thank you." And one or the other he is pretty certain to receive. He never encounters the withering look which madam gives to other men to mad 'em. But alas for "our own" unlucky correspondent!

PUNCHINELLO has often had occasion to confer with the gentlemen who "blow messages on the hollow wire," as they say out at Fort Laramie,--but he disclaims ever having been looked upon as a pick-pocket. Behold his smiling face and say if any telegraph operator could be so slow as to believe him a fingerer of other men's fobs.

* * * * *

COMMERCIAL CON.

Why does the Ocean Commerce of America remind one of the railings of a gallery? Because, just now, it is simply Ballast Trade.

* * * * *

"THEREBY HANGS A TAIL."

A citizen of Dubuque is said by a newspaper itemizer to have lately developed a tail. We do not believe it; but that the author of the story is a tale-bearer, himself, is a matter beyond question.

BOOK NOTICES.

ANTONIA. A Novel. By GEORGE SAND. Boston: ROBERTS BROTHERS.

The popularity of Madame DUDEVANT'S writings is now at its zenith, and the present volume is a very welcome addition to those already so well set forth by Messrs. ROBERTS. It has been translated into excellent idiomatic English by Miss VIRGINIA VAUGHAN.

POEMS. By DANTE GABRIEL ROSSETTI. Boston: ROBERTS BROTHERS.

Comparatively new to the public as a poet, Mr. D. G. ROSSETTI has yet evinced so much of the poetic fire in his contributions to magazine literature, from time to time, as to warrant the reproduction of them in book form, and this has been done in a very tasteful manner by Messrs. ROBERTS.

By an error in our notice of "The Men who Advertise," (see PUNCHINELLO No. 13,) the name of the publishers of that useful volume, Messrs. G.P. ROWELL & Co., was omitted.

* * * * *

A. T. Stewart & Co.

Offer & Large Stock of

BROCHE GRENADINES,

At 12-1/2 cents per yard, recently sold at 25 cents.

Broche Grenadine

At 20 cents per yard, reduced from 30 cents.

_THREE CASES_.

Black Ground Grenadines,

Embroidered, with Silk Bouquet, EXTRA RICH, 50 cents per yard, value $1.

TWO CASES

Striped Japanese Silks, Extra heavy, only $1 per yard.

ONE CASE MAGNIFICENT AND STYLISH SASH RIBBONS.

A Choice Assortment of Crepe de Chene,

In the latest Paris colors, for Dresses and Millinery purposes.

GREAT REDUCTIONS

Will be made in their Stocks of Hosiery, Printed Jaconets, Organdies. Percales, &c.

BROADWAY, 4th Avenue, 9th and l0th Streets.

* * * * *

A. T. STEWART & Co.

Have largely replenished with

NOVELTIES.

Their Stock of

Silks, Dress Goods.

Linen, Lawn and Organdie DRESSES.

Misses' and Children's Ready-Made Garments and Underwear. Llama Lace Shawls, Jackets, &c.

BROADWAY, 4th Avenue, 9th and 10th Street.

* * * * *

A. T. Stewart & Co.

Have received and opened

4 Cases Extra Quality Black Iron Grenadine, Price 75c. per yard, upwards. Also,

2 Cases Colored Iron Grenadines, 50c. per yard, upwards.

2 Cases Colored Trimming Satins, In all the scarce shades of color.

1 Case Extra Rich Sash Ribbons, Neckties, Bonnet Ribbons, ETC., ETC.,

BROADWAY, 4th Avenue, 9th and 10th Street.

* * * * *

Extraordinary Bargains.

A. T. Stewart & Co.

Offer at Less than One-Half their Cost,

Paris and Domestic Made Silk, Barege, Organdie and Tulle DRESSES,

VERY SLIGHTLY INJURED,

Suitable for Street or Evening wear.

The above will be exhibited in the section of the Second story next to the corner of Broadway and 9th Street.

BROADWAY, 4th Ave., 9th and 10th Sts.

* * * * *

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