Chapter XXIX: Gracie's Dilemma

"One on 'em's up in his room, but I dunnot know which," grunted old Mrs. Lee, in answer to Eager's request for the boys, either or both, and he went up at once. A tap on Jim's door received no answer. Jack's opened to him at once.

"Mr. Eager!" And there was a hungry look in the boy's eyes.

"Hard at work, old chap?"--at sight of a number of books spread out on the table. "I thought this was holidays with you."

"I tried, but I couldn't get down to it."

"Where's Jim?"

"He's off down along--couldn't it still. Have you brought us any word from Gracie?"--very anxiously.

"Well, I've come to have a talk with you about that." And the Rev. Charles pulled out his pipe and began to fill it. "You ought to have spoken to me first, you know----"

"Oh?--didn't know--not used to that kind of thing, you know."

"I suppose not. Still, that is the proper way to go about it."

"What does Gracie say?" asked Jack impatiently.

"I've come to ask you both, Jack, to let the matter lie for a time." And Jack's foot beat an impatient tattoo. "You see, Gracie had no idea whatever of this, and it has knocked the wind out of her. You can't imagine how upset she is. First, she thought you were joking. Then she had a good cry, and now I've left her staring into the fire, fearing you can never all be friends again as you always have been."

"Why, of course we can!"

"I told her so, but she says things can never be the same."

"We don't want them the same."

"No, I know. But you see, Jack, Gracie has not been thinking of you two in that way; and in the way she has always thought of you, as her dearest friends, she likes the one of you just as much as the other."

Jack grunted.

"After this it will be impossible for her to regard you simply as friends. But you must give her time----"

"Is there any one else?" growled Jack.

"There is no one else. I asked her."

"And--how--long----"

"To name a time, I should say a year."

"A great deal may happen in a year. We may all be dead."

"The chances are that this will be a year of great happenings," said Eager gravely. "The issues are in God's hands. May He grant us all a safe deliverance!"

"You really think it will be war?" asked the boy quickly. "I fear so!"

Jack sat gazing steadily into the fire and limned coming glories in the dancing flames.

"A year's a terrible long time to wait when you feel like a starving dog. But if there's a war . . . yes--that would make it pass quicker."

"Have you said anything to your grandfather about this matter?"

"How could we till we knew which----"

Eager nodded. "Best leave it so at present. How soon will Jim be back? I'd like to have a word with him too."

"I don't know. He's a good deal worked up."

"I'll go along and meet him."

"I'll come too?"

"No. Better let me see him by himself. You can talk it over together afterwards. I hope this won't make any difference between you two, Jack."

"One of us has got to put up with disappointment some time," said Jack steadily. "But we'll just have to stand it."

Eager tramped away along the rim of the tidal sand, well pleased with Jack's reasonable acceptance of the situation. Jim, he felt sure, would be no less sensible, and matters would run on smoothly; and so Time, the great Solver of Problems, would be given the opportunity of working out this one also.

Deeply pondering the whole matter, and letting his thoughts wander back along the years, he tramped on almost forgetful of the actual reason for his coming. It was not till a gleam of light amid the sand-hills on his left told him he had got to Seth Rimmer's cottage, that he knew how far he had come. Jim might have called there, so he rapped on the door and went in.

"Ech, Mr. Eager! It's good o' you to come and see an owd woman like this," said Mrs. Rimmer from the bed.

"It's always a pleasure to see you, Mrs. Rimmer. You're one of the ones that it does one good to see."

"It's very good o' yo'."

"But I came really to look for Jim Carron. They told me he had come down this way, and I thought he might have called in to see you."

"No. I havena seen owt of him."

"And you're all alone? Where's everybody?"

"Th' mester's at his work--God keep him; it's a bad, black night!--and Seth--he's away."

"And where's my friend Kattie? She ought not to leave you all alone like this."

"Ech, I'm used to it. 'Oo's always slipping out. I dunnot know who----" she began, with a quite unusual fretfulness, which showed him she had been worrying over it.

And then the door opened and Kattie came in, ruffled somewhat with the south-west wind, which had whipped the colour into her face. With a bit of cherry ribbon at her throat, and another bit in her hair, and her eyes sparkling in the lamplight, she looked uncommonly pretty.

"How they all grow up!" thought Eager to himself. "Here's another who will set the village boys by the ears; and it seems no time since she was a child running about with scarce a rag to her back!"

"Mr. Eager?" said Kattie in surprise.

"I came to find Jim Carron, Kattie. I suppose you haven't seen him about anywhere?"

"I saw some one walking up along," said Kattie, "but it was too dark to see who it was."

"Jim, I'll be bound. Good night, Mrs. Rimmer! Good night, Kattie! I'll be in again in a day or two." And he set off in haste the way he had come.

A few minutes' quick walking showed him a dim figure strolling along the higher causeway of dried seaweed and drift, and kicking it up disconsolately at times, just as he used to do as a boy when seeking treasure.

"That you, Jim?" And the figure stopped.

"Hello!--what--you, Mr. Eager?"

"Just me. I came to look for you. Kattie told me you'd come on----"

"Kattie?"

"Well, she said she'd seen some one pass, and I guessed it was you. I've been in having a talk with Jack, my boy, and I wanted to see you too." And he linked arms and went on.

"Yes?"

"About your letter to Gracie." And Eager felt the boy's arm jump inside his own. "It was a tremendous surprise to her, you know. She had never thought of either of you in that way, and it knocked her all of a heap. Now I want you all to let matters rest as they are for a year, Jim----"

"A year! Good Lord!"

"I know how you feel, lad, but it is absolutely the only thing to be done. You've been like brothers to her, you know. You are both very dear to her; but when you ask her suddenly to choose between you, she cannot. I couldn't myself. You are both dearer to me than any one in the world . . . almost . . . after Gracie, . . . but if you put me in a comer and bade me, at risk of my life, say which of you I liked best--well, I couldn't do it. And that's just her position."

"I'm afraid . . . I don't suppose I stand much chance . . . against old Jack. . . . He's a much finer fellow. . . . But, oh, Mr. Eager . . . I can't tell you how I feel about her. . . . If it could make her happy I'd be ready to lie right down here and die this minute." And Eager pressed the jerking arm inside his own understandingly.

"I believe you would, my boy. But it wouldn't make for Gracie's happiness at all to have you lie down and die. You must both live to do good work in the world and make us all proud of you. And the work looks like coming, Jim, and quickly."

"You mean this war they're talking about?"

"Yes. I'm afraid there's no doubt it's coming, and war is a terrible thing."

"It'll give one the chance of showing what's in one, anyway."

"Some one has to pay for such chances."

"I suppose so . . . . unless one pays oneself. . . . I don't know that I particularly want to kill any one, but I suppose one forgets all that in the thick of it. . . . Anyway, if it comes to fighting I think I can do that . . . if I haven't got much of a head for books and things."

"I believe you will do your duty, whatever it is, my boy, and no man can do more."

"Well?" asked Gracie eagerly, when Eager got home again. "Did you see them? Quick, Charlie! Tell me!"

"Yes, I saw them. Jack at home--trying to work. Jim down along--couldn't sit still."

"The poor boys!"

"They are very much in earnest, but I have got them to see the reasonableness of waiting--for a year at least."

"I'm glad. I don't know how I can ever choose between them, Charlie."

"Don't trouble about it, dear. Things have a way of working themselves out if you leave them to themselves."

"I wonder!" she said wearily.