Chapter X: Prologue

_The scene is laid in the pit, the candles are already lighted, the musicians are gathered in the orchestra. The theatre is filled, people talking in confusion, some arriving, etc_.

FISCHER, MÜLLER, SCHLOSSER, BÖTTICHER, _in the pit_

FISCHER.

Say, but I am curious, Herr Müller, what do you think of today's play?

MÜLLER.

I should be more likely to expect the sky to fall in than to see such a play at our theatre.

FISCHER.

Do you know the play?

MÜLLER.

Not at all. A strange title that: _Puss in Boots_. I do hope they're not going to present that child's play at the theatre.

SCHLOSS.

Why, is it an opera?

FISCHER.

Anything but that; the bill says: _A Fairy-tale for Children_.

SCHLOSS.

A fairy-tale? But in Heaven's name, we're not children, are we, that they want to present such pieces for us? They certainly won't put an actual cat on the stage, will they?

FISCHER.

It may turn out to be an imitation of the new Arcadians, a sort of Terkaleon.

MÜLLER.

Now that wouldn't be bad, for I've been wishing this long while to see some time such a wonderful opera without music.

FISCHER.

Without music it is absurd, for, my dear friend, we're beyond such childish nonsense, such superstition; enlightenment has borne its natural fruits.

MÜLLER.

It may turn out to be a regular picture of domestic life, and the cat is only a joke, something like a jest, so to speak, a motive, if I may call it that.

SCHLOSS.

To tell you my honest opinion, I take the whole thing to be a trick to spread sentiment among the people, give them suggestions. You'll see if I'm not right. A revolutionary play, as far as I can understand.

FISCHER.

I agree with you, too, for otherwise the style would be horribly offensive. For my part I must admit I never could believe in witches or spirits, not to mention _Puss in Boots_.

SCHLOSS.

The age of these phantoms is past. Why, there comes Leutner; perhaps he can tell us more.

[_Leutner pushes himself through the crowd_.]

LEUTNER.

Good evening, good evening! Well, how are you?

MÜLLER.

Do tell us, will you, what sort of play we're having tonight?

[_The music begins_.]

LEUTNER.

So late already? Why, I've come in the nick of time. About the play? I have just been speaking with the author; he is at the theatre and helping dress the tom-cat.

MANY VOICES.

Is helping?--The author?--The cat? So a cat will appear, after all?

LEUTNER.

Yes, indeed, why his name is even on the bill.

FISCHER.

I say, who's playing that part?

LEUTNER.

The strange actor, of course, the great man.

MÜLLER.

Indeed? But how can they possibly play such nonsense?

LEUTNER.

For a change, the author thinks.

FISCHER.

A fine change, why not Bluebeard too, and Prince Kobold? Indeed! Some excellent subjects for the drama!

MÜLLER.

But how are they going to dress the cat?--And I wonder whether he wears real boots?

LEUTNER.

I am just as impatient as all of you.

FISCHER.

But shall we really have such stuff played to us? We've come here out of curiosity, to be sure, but still we have taste.

MÜLLER.

I feel like making a noise.

LEUTNER.

It's rather cold, too. I'll make a start. (_He stamps with his feet, the others fall in_.)

WIESENER (_on the other side_).

What does this pounding mean?

LEUTNER.

That's to rescue good taste.

WIESENER.

Well, then I won't be the last, either. (_He stamps_.)

VOICES.

Be quiet, or you can't hear the music. (_All are stamping_.)

SCHLOSS.

But, I say, we really ought to let them go through the play, for, after all, we've given our money anyhow; afterward we'll pound so they'll hear us out doors.

ALL.

No, they'll now--taste--rules--art--otherwise everything will go to ruin.

A CANDLE-SNUFFER.

Gentlemen, shall the police be sent in?

LEUTNER.

We have paid, we represent the public, and therefore we will have our own good taste and no farces.

THE PLAYWRIGHT (_behind the scenes_).

The play will begin immediately.

MÜLLER.

No play--we want no play--we want good taste--

ALL.

Good taste! good taste!

PLAYWR.

I am puzzled--what do you mean, if I may ask?

SCHLOSS.

Good taste! Are you an author and don't even know what good taste means?

PLAYWR.

Consider a young beginner--

SCHLOSS.

We want to know nothing about beginners--we want to see a decent play-a play in good taste!

PLAYWR.

What sort? What kind?

MÜLLER.

Domestic stories--elopements--brothers and sisters from the country--something like that.

[_The Author comes out from behind the curtain_.]

PLAYWR.

Gentlemen--

ALL.

Is that the author?

FISCHER.

He doesn't look much like an author.

SCHLOSS.

Impertinent fellow!

MÜLLER.

His hair isn't even trimmed.

PLAYWR.

Gentlemen-pardon my boldness.

FISCHER.

How can you write such plays? Why haven't you trained yourself?

PLAYWR.

Grant me just one minute's audience before you condemn me. I know that the honorable public must pass judgment on the author, and that from them there is no appeal, but I know the justice of an honorable public, and I am assured they will not frighten me away from a course in which I so need their indulgent guidance.

FISCHER.

He doesn't talk badly.

MÜLLER.

He's more courteous than I thought.

SCHLOSS.

He has respect for the public, after all.

PLAYWR.

I am ashamed to present to such illustrious judges the modest inspiration of my Muse; it is only the skill of our actors which still consoles me to some extent, otherwise I should be sunk in despair without further ado.

FISCHER.

I am sorry for him.

MÜLLER.

A good fellow!

PLAYWR.

When I heard your worthy stamping--nothing has ever frightened me so, I am still pale and trembling and do not myself comprehend how I have attained to the courage of thus appearing before you.

LEUTNER.

Well, clap, then! (_All clap_.)

PLAYWR.

I wanted to make an attempt to furnish amusement by means of humor, by cheerfulness and real jokes, and hope I have been successful, since our newest plays so seldom afford us an opportunity to laugh.

MÜLLER.

That's certainly true!

LEUTNER.

He's right--that man.

SCHLOSS.

Bravo! Bravo!

ALL.

Bravo! Bravo! (_They clap_.)

PLAYWR.

I leave you, honored sirs, to decide now whether my attempt is to be rejected entirely--trembling, I withdraw, and the play will begin. (_He bows very respectfully and goes behind the curtain_.)

ALL.

Bravo! Bravo!

VOICES FROM THE GALLERY.

_Da capo!_--

[_All are laughing. The music begins again; meanwhile the curtain rises_.]