Chapter L (3)

:wabbit: /wab'it/ [almost certainly from Elmer Fudd's immortal
line "You wascawwy wabbit!"] n. 1. A legendary early hack
reported on a System/360 at RPI and elsewhere around 1978; this may
have descended (if only by inspiration) from hack called RABBITS
reported from 1969 on a Burroughs 55000 at the University of
Washington Computer Center. The program would make two copies of
itself every time it was run, eventually crashing the system.
2. By extension, any hack that includes infinite self-replication
but is not a {virus} or {worm}. See {fork bomb}, see also
{cookie monster}.

:WAITS:: /wayts/ n. The mutant cousin of {{TOPS-10}} used on a
handful of systems at {{SAIL}} up to 1990. There was never an
`official' expansion of WAITS (the name itself having been arrived
at by a rather sideways process), but it was frequently glossed as
`West-coast Alternative to ITS'. Though WAITS was less visible
than ITS, there was frequent exchange of people and ideas between
the two communities, and innovations pioneered at WAITS exerted
enormous indirect influence. The early screen modes of {EMACS},
for example, were directly inspired by WAITS's `E' editor --- one
of a family of editors that were the first to do `real-time
editing', in which the editing commands were invisible and where
one typed text at the point of insertion/overwriting. The modern
style of multi-region windowing is said to have originated there,
and WAITS alumni at XEROX PARC and elsewhere played major roles in
the developments that led to the XEROX Star, the Macintosh, and the
Sun workstations. {Bucky bits} were also invented there ---
thus, the ALT key on every IBM PC is a WAITS legacy. One notable
WAITS feature seldom duplicated elsewhere was a news-wire interface
that allowed WAITS hackers to read, store, and filter AP and UPI
dispatches from their terminals; the system also featured a
still-unusual level of support for what is now called `multimedia'
computing, allowing analog audio and video signals to be switched
to programming terminals.

:waldo: /wol'doh/ [From Robert A. Heinlein's story "Waldo"]
1. A mechanical agent, such as a gripper arm, controlled by a human
limb. When these were developed for the nuclear industry in the
mid-1940s they were named after the invention described by Heinlein
in the story, which he wrote in 1942. Now known by the more
generic term `telefactoring', this technology is of intense
interest to NASA for tasks like space station maintenance. 2. At
Harvard (particularly by Tom Cheatham and students), this is used
instead of {foobar} as a metasyntactic variable and general
nonsense word. See {foo}, {bar}, {foobar}, {quux}.

:walk: n.,vt. Traversal of a data structure, especially an array or
linked-list data structure in {core}. See also {codewalker},
{silly walk}, {clobber}.

:walk off the end of: vt. To run past the end of an array, list, or
medium after stepping through it --- a good way to land in trouble.
Often the result of an {off-by-one error}. Compare
{clobber}, {roach}, {smash the stack}.

:walking drives: n. An occasional failure mode of magnetic-disk
drives back in the days when they were huge, clunky {washing
machine}s. Those old {dinosaur} parts carried terrific angular
momentum; the combination of a misaligned spindle or worn bearings
and stick-slip interactions with the floor could cause them to
`walk' across a room, lurching alternate corners forward a couple
of millimeters at a time. There is a legend about a drive that
walked over to the only door to the computer room and jammed it
shut; the staff had to cut a hole in the wall in order to get at
it! Walking could also be induced by certain patterns of drive
access (a fast seek across the whole width of the disk, followed by
a slow seek in the other direction). Some bands of old-time
hackers figured out how to induce disk-accessing patterns that
would do this to particular drive models and held disk-drive races.

:wall: [WPI] interj. 1. An indication of confusion, usually spoken
with a quizzical tone: "Wall??" 2. A request for further
explication. Compare {octal forty}. 3. [UNIX] v. To send a message
to everyone currently logged in, esp. with the wall(8) utility.

It is said that sense 1 came from the idiom `like talking to a
blank wall'. It was originally used in situations where, after you
had carefully answered a question, the questioner stared at you
blankly, clearly having understood nothing that was explained. You
would then throw out a "Hello, wall?" to elicit some sort of
response from the questioner. Later, confused questioners began
voicing "Wall?" themselves.

:wall follower: n. A person or algorithm that compensates for lack
of sophistication or native stupidity by efficiently following some
simple procedure shown to have been effective in the past. Used of
an algorithm, this is not necessarily pejorative; it recalls
`Harvey Wallbanger', the winning robot in an early AI contest
(named, of course, after the cocktail). Harvey successfully solved
mazes by keeping a `finger' on one wall and running till it came
out the other end. This was inelegant, but it was mathematically
guaranteed to work on simply-connected mazes --- and, in fact,
Harvey outperformed more sophisticated robots that tried to
`learn' each maze by building an internal representation of it.
Used of humans, the term *is* pejorative and implies an
uncreative, bureaucratic, by-the-book mentality. See also {code
grinder}, {droid}.

:wall time: n. (also `wall clock time') 1. `Real world' time (what
the clock on the wall shows), as opposed to the system clock's idea
of time. 2. The real running time of a program, as opposed to the
number of {clocks} required to execute it (on a timesharing
system these will differ, as no one program gets all the
{clocks}, and on multiprocessor systems with good thread support
one may get more processor clocks than real-time clocks).

:wallpaper: n. 1. A file containing a listing (e.g., assembly
listing) or a transcript, esp. a file containing a transcript of
all or part of a login session. (The idea was that the paper for
such listings was essentially good only for wallpaper, as evidenced
at Stanford, where it was used to cover windows.) Now rare,
esp. since other systems have developed other terms for it (e.g.,
PHOTO on TWENEX). However, the UNIX world doesn't have an
equivalent term, so perhaps {wallpaper} will take hold there.
The term probably originated on ITS, where the commands to begin
and end transcript files were `:WALBEG' and `:WALEND',
with default file `WALL PAPER' (the space was a path
delimiter). 2. The background pattern used on graphical
workstations (this is techspeak under the `Windows' graphical user
interface to MS-DOS). 3. `wallpaper file' n. The file that
contains the wallpaper information before it is actually printed on
paper. (Even if you don't intend ever to produce a real paper copy
of the file, it is still called a wallpaper file.)

:wango: /wang'goh/ n. Random bit-level {grovel}ling going on in
a system during some unspecified operation. Often used in
combination with {mumble}. For example: "You start with the `.o'
file, run it through this postprocessor that does mumble-wango ---
and it comes out a snazzy object-oriented executable."

:wank: /wangk/ [Columbia University: prob. by mutation from
Commonwealth slang v. `wank', to masturbate] n.,v. Used much as
{hack} is elsewhere, as a noun denoting a clever technique or
person or the result of such cleverness. May describe (negatively)
the act of hacking for hacking's sake ("Quit wanking, let's go get
supper!") or (more positively) a {wizard}. Adj. `wanky'
describes something particularly clever (a person, program, or
algorithm). Conversations can also get wanky when there are too
many wanks involved. This excess wankiness is signalled by an
overload of the `wankometer' (compare {bogometer}). When the
wankometer overloads, the conversation's subject must be changed,
or all non-wanks will leave. Compare `neep-neeping' (under
{neep-neep}). Usage: U.S. only. In Britain and the Commonwealth
this word is *extremely* rude and is best avoided unless one
intends to give offense.

:wannabee: /won'*-bee/ (also, more plausibly, spelled
`wannabe') [from a term recently used to describe Madonna fans
who dress, talk, and act like their idol; prob. originally from
biker slang] n. A would-be {hacker}. The connotations of this
term differ sharply depending on the age and exposure of the
subject. Used of a person who is in or might be entering
{larval stage}, it is semi-approving; such wannabees can be
annoying but most hackers remember that they, too, were once such
creatures. When used of any professional programmer, CS academic,
writer, or {suit}, it is derogatory, implying that said person
is trying to cuddle up to the hacker mystique but doesn't,
fundamentally, have a prayer of understanding what it is all about.
Overuse of terms from this lexicon is often an indication of the
{wannabee} nature. Compare {newbie}.

Historical note: The wannabee phenomenon has a slightly different
flavor now (1991) than it did ten or fifteen years ago. When the
people who are now hackerdom's tribal elders were in {larval
stage}, the process of becoming a hacker was largely unconscious
and unaffected by models known in popular culture --- communities
formed spontaneously around people who, *as individuals*, felt
irresistibly drawn to do hackerly things, and what wannabees
experienced was a fairly pure, skill-focused desire to become
similarly wizardly. Those days of innocence are gone forever;
society's adaptation to the advent of the microcomputer after 1980
included the elevation of the hacker as a new kind of folk hero,
and the result is that some people semi-consciously set out to
*be hackers* and borrow hackish prestige by fitting the
popular image of hackers. Fortunately, to do this really well, one
has to actually become a wizard. Nevertheless, old-time hackers
tend to share a poorly articulated disquiet about the change; among
other things, it gives them mixed feelings about the effects of
public compendia of lore like this one.

:warlording: [from the USENET group alt.fan.warlord] v. The act
of excoriating a bloated, ugly, or derivative {sig block}.
Common grounds for warlording include the presence of a signature
rendered in a {BUAF}, over-used or cliched {sig quote}s, ugly
{ASCII art}, or simply excessive size. The original `Warlord'
was a {BIFF}-like {newbie} c.1991 who featured in his sig a
particularly large and obnoxious ASCII graphic resembling the sword
of Conan the Barbarian in the 1981 John Milius movie; the group
name alt.fan.warlord was sarcasm, and the characteristic mode
of warlording is devastatingly sarcastic praise.

:warm boot: n. See {boot}.

:wart: n. A small, {crock}y {feature} that sticks out of an
otherwise {clean} design. Something conspicuous for localized
ugliness, especially a special-case exception to a general rule.
For example, in some versions of `csh(1)', single quotes
literalize every character inside them except `!'. In ANSI C,
the `??' syntax used obtaining ASCII characters in a foreign
environment is a wart. See also {miswart}.

:washing machine: n. Old-style 14-inch hard disks in floor-standing
cabinets. So called because of the size of the cabinet and the
`top-loading' access to the media packs --- and, of course, they
were always set on `spin cycle'. The washing-machine idiom
transcends language barriers; it is even used in Russian hacker
jargon. See also {walking drives}. The thick channel cables
connecting these were called `bit hoses' (see {hose}).

:water MIPS: n. (see {MIPS}, sense 2) Large, water-cooled
machines of either today's ECL-supercomputer flavor or yesterday's
traditional {mainframe} type.

:wave a dead chicken: v. To perform a ritual in the direction of
crashed software or hardware that one believes to be futile but
is nevertheless necessary so that others are satisfied that an
appropriate degree of effort has been expended. "I'll wave a dead
chicken over the source code, but I really think we've run into an
OS bug." Compare {voodoo programming}, {rain dance}.

:weasel: n. [Cambridge] A na"ive user, one who deliberately or
accidentally does things that are stupid or ill-advised. Roughly
synonymous with {loser}.

:wedged: [from a common description of recto-cranial inversion]
adj. 1. To be stuck, incapable of proceeding without help. This
is different from having crashed. If the system has crashed, then
it has become totally non-functioning. If the system is wedged, it
is trying to do something but cannot make progress; it may be
capable of doing a few things, but not be fully operational. For
example, a process may become wedged if it {deadlock}s with
another (but not all instances of wedging are deadlocks). See also
{gronk}, {locked up}, {hosed}. Describes a
{deadlock}ed condition. 2. Often refers to humans suffering
misconceptions. "He's totally wedged --- he's convinced that he
can levitate through meditation." 3. [UNIX] Specifically used to
describe the state of a TTY left in a losing state by abort of a
screen-oriented program or one that has messed with the line
discipline in some obscure way.

:wedgie: [Fairchild] n. A bug. Prob. related to {wedged}.

:wedgitude: /wedj'i-t[y]ood/ n. The quality or state of being
{wedged}.

:weeble: /weeb'l/ [Cambridge] interj. Used to denote frustration,
usually at amazing stupidity. "I stuck the disk in upside down."
"Weeble...." Compare {gurfle}.

:weeds: n. 1. Refers to development projects or algorithms that have
no possible relevance or practical application. Comes from `off in
the weeds'. Used in phrases like "lexical analysis for microcode
is serious weeds...." 2. At CDC/ETA before its demise, the
phrase `go off in the weeds' was equivalent to IBM's {branch to
Fishkill} and mainstream hackerdom's {jump off into never-never
land}.

:weenie: n. 1. [on BBSes] Any of a species of luser resembling a
less amusing version of {BIFF} that infests many {BBS}
systems. The typical weenie is a teenage boy with poor social
skills travelling under a grandiose {handle} derived from
fantasy or heavy-metal rock lyrics. Among sysops, `the weenie
problem' refers to the marginally literate and profanity-laden
{flamage} weenies tend to spew all over a newly-discovered BBS.
Compare {spod}, {computer geek}, {terminal junkie}.
2. [Among hackers] When used with a qualifier (for example, as in
{UNIX weenie}, VMS weenie, IBM weenie) this can be either an
insult or a term of praise, depending on context, tone of voice,
and whether or not it is applied by a person who considers him or
herself to be the same sort of weenie. Implies that the weenie has
put a major investment of time, effort, and concentration into the
area indicated; whether this is positive or negative depends on the
hearer's judgment of how the speaker feels about that area. See
also {bigot}. 3. The semicolon character, `;' (ASCII
0111011).

:Weenix: /wee'niks/ [ITS] n. A derogatory term for {{UNIX}},
derived from {UNIX weenie}. According to one noted ex-ITSer, it
is "the operating system preferred by Unix Weenies: typified by
poor modularity, poor reliability, hard file deletion, no file
version numbers, case sensitivity everywhere, and users who believe
that these are all advantages". Some ITS fans behave as though
they believe UNIX stole a future that rightfully belonged to them.
See {{ITS}}, sense 2.

:well-behaved: adj. 1. [primarily {{MS-DOS}}] Said of software
conforming to system interface guidelines and standards.
Well-behaved software uses the operating system to do chores such
as keyboard input, allocating memory and drawing graphics. Oppose
{ill-behaved}. 2. Software that does its job quietly and
without counterintuitive effects. Esp. said of software having
an interface spec sufficiently simple and well-defined that it can
be used as a {tool} by other software. See {cat}.

:well-connected: adj. Said of a computer installation, this means
that it has reliable email links with the network and/or that
it relays a large fraction of available {USENET} newsgroups.
`Well-known' can be almost synonymous, but also implies that the
site's name is familiar to many (due perhaps to an archive service
or active USENET users).

:wetware: /wet'weir/ [prob. from the novels of Rudy Rucker] n.
1. The human nervous system, as opposed to computer hardware or
software. "Wetware has 7 plus or minus 2 temporary registers."
2. Human beings (programmers, operators, administrators) attached
to a computer system, as opposed to the system's hardware or
software. See {liveware}, {meatware}.

:whack: v. According to arch-hacker James Gosling, to "...modify a
program with no idea whatsoever how it works." (See {whacker}.)
It is actually possible to do this in nontrivial circumstances if
the change is small and well-defined and you are very good at
{glark}ing things from context. As a trivial example, it is
relatively easy to change all `stderr' writes to `stdout'
writes in a piece of C filter code which remains otherwise
mysterious.

:whacker: [University of Maryland: from {hacker}] n. 1. A person,
similar to a {hacker}, who enjoys exploring the details of
programmable systems and how to stretch their capabilities.
Whereas a hacker tends to produce great hacks, a whacker only ends
up whacking the system or program in question. Whackers are often
quite egotistical and eager to claim {wizard} status,
regardless of the views of their peers. 2. A person who is good at
programming quickly, though rather poorly and ineptly.

:whales: n. See {like kicking dead whales down the beach}.

:whalesong: n. The peculiar clicking and whooshing sounds made by a
PEP modem such as the Telebit Trailblazer as it tries to
synchronize with another PEP modem for their special high-speed
mode. This sound isn't anything like the normal two-tone handshake
between conventional modems and is instantly recognizable to anyone
who has heard it more than once. It sounds, in fact, very much
like whale songs. This noise is also called "the moose call" or
"moose tones".

:What's a spline?: [XEROX PARC] This phrase expands to: "You have
just used a term that I've heard for a year and a half, and I feel
I should know, but don't. My curiosity has finally overcome my
guilt." The PARC lexicon adds "Moral: don't hesitate to ask
questions, even if they seem obvious."

:wheel: [from slang `big wheel' for a powerful person] n. A
person who has an active {wheel bit}. "We need to find a
wheel to unwedge the hung tape drives." (see {wedged}, sense
1.)

:wheel bit: n. A privilege bit that allows the possessor to perform
some restricted operation on a timesharing system, such as read or
write any file on the system regardless of protections, change or
look at any address in the running monitor, crash or reload the
system, and kill or create jobs and user accounts. The term was
invented on the TENEX operating system, and carried over to
TOPS-20, XEROX-IFS, and others. The state of being in a privileged
logon is sometimes called `wheel mode'. This term entered the
UNIX culture from TWENEX in the mid-1980s and has been gaining
popularity there (esp. at university sites). See also {root}.

:wheel wars: [Stanford University] A period in {larval stage}
during which student hackers hassle each other by attempting to log
each other out of the system, delete each other's files, and
otherwise wreak havoc, usually at the expense of the lesser users.

:White Book: n. 1. Syn. {K&R}. 2. Adobe's fourth book in the
PostScript series, describing the previously-secret format of Type
1 fonts; `Adobe Type 1 Font Format, version 1.1',
(Addison-Wesley, 1990, ISBN 0-201-57044-0). See also {Red Book},
{Green Book}, {Blue Book}.

:whizzy: [Sun] adj. (alt. `wizzy') Describes a {cuspy} program;
one that is feature-rich and well presented.

:WIBNI: // [Bell Labs: Wouldn't It Be Nice If] n. What most
requirements documents and specifications consist entirely of.
Compare {IWBNI}.

:widget: n. 1. A meta-thing. Used to stand for a real object in
didactic examples (especially database tutorials). Legend has it
that the original widgets were holders for buggy whips. "But
suppose the parts list for a widget has 52 entries...."
2. [poss. evoking `window gadget'] A user interface object in
{X} graphical user interfaces.

:wiggles: n. [scientific computation] In solving partial differential
equations by finite difference and similar methods, wiggles are
sawtooth (up-down-up-down) oscillations at the shortest wavelength
representable on the grid. If an algorithm is unstable, this is
often the most unstable waveform, so it grows to dominate the
solution. Alternatively, stable (though inaccurate) wiggles can be
generated near a discontinuity by a Gibbs phenomenon.

:WIMP environment: n. [acronymic from `Window, Icon, Menu, Pointing
device (or Pull-down menu)'] A graphical-user-interface-based
environment such as {X} or the Macintosh interface, as described
by a hacker who prefers command-line interfaces for their superior
flexibility and extensibility. See {menuitis},
{user-obsequious}.

:win: [MIT] 1. vi. To succeed. A program wins if no unexpected
conditions arise, or (especially) if it sufficiently {robust} to
take exceptions in stride. 2. n. Success, or a specific instance
thereof. A pleasing outcome. A {feature}. Emphatic forms:
`moby win', `super win', `hyper-win' (often used
interjectively as a reply). For some reason `suitable win' is
also common at MIT, usually in reference to a satisfactory solution
to a problem. Oppose {lose}; see also {big win}, which isn't
quite just an intensification of `win'.

:win big: vi. To experience serendipity. "I went shopping and won
big; there was a 2-for-1 sale." See {big win}.

:win win: interj. Expresses pleasure at a {win}.

:Winchester:: n. Informal generic term for `floating-head'
magnetic-disk drives in which the read-write head planes over the
disk surface on an air cushion. The name arose because the
original 1973 engineering prototype for what later became the
IBM 3340 featured two 30-megabyte volumes; 30--30 became
`Winchester' when somebody noticed the similarity to the common
term for a famous Winchester rifle (in the latter, the first 30
referred to caliber and the second to the grain weight of the
charge).

:winged comments: n. Comments set on the same line as code, as
opposed to {boxed comments}. In C, for example:

d = sqrt(x*x + y*y); /* distance from origin */

Generally these refer only to the action(s) taken on that line.

:winkey: n. (alt. `winkey face') See {emoticon}.

:winnage: /win'*j/ n. The situation when a lossage is corrected, or
when something is winning.

:winner: 1. n. An unexpectedly good situation, program, programmer,
or person. "So it turned out I could use a {lexer} generator
instead of hand-coding my own pattern recognizer. What a win!"
2. `real winner': Often sarcastic, but also used as high praise
(see also the note under {user}). "He's a real winner --- never
reports a bug till he can duplicate it and send in an
example."

:winnitude: /win'*-t[y]ood/ n. The quality of winning (as opposed
to {winnage}, which is the result of winning). "Guess what?
They tweaked the microcode and now the LISP interpreter runs twice
as fast as it used to." "That's really great! Boy, what
winnitude!" "Yup. I'll probably get a half-hour's winnage on the
next run of my program." Perhaps curiously, the obvious antonym
`lossitude' is rare.

:wired: n. See {hardwired}.

:wirehead: /wi:r'hed/ n. [prob. from SF slang for an
electrical-brain-stimulation addict] 1. A hardware hacker,
especially one who concentrates on communications hardware. 2. An
expert in local-area networks. A wirehead can be a network
software wizard too, but will always have the ability to deal with
network hardware, down to the smallest component. Wireheads are
known for their ability to lash up an Ethernet terminator from
spare resistors, for example.

:wirewater: n. Syn. {programming fluid}. This melds the
mainstream slang adjective `wired' (stimulated, up, hyperactive)
with `firewater'.

:wish list: n. A list of desired features or bug fixes that probably
won't get done for a long time, usually because the person
responsible for the code is too busy or can't think of a clean way
to do it. "OK, I'll add automatic filename completion to the wish
list for the new interface." Compare {tick-list features}.

:within delta of: adj. See {delta}.

:within epsilon of: adj. See {epsilon}.

:wizard: n. 1. A person who knows how a complex piece of software
or hardware works (that is, who {grok}s it); esp. someone who
can find and fix bugs quickly in an emergency. Someone is a
{hacker} if he or she has general hacking ability, but is a wizard
with respect to something only if he or she has specific detailed
knowledge of that thing. A good hacker could become a wizard for
something given the time to study it. 2. A person who is permitted
to do things forbidden to ordinary people; one who has {wheel}
privileges on a system. 3. A UNIX expert, esp. a UNIX systems
programmer. This usage is well enough established that `UNIX
Wizard' is a recognized job title at some corporations and to most
headhunters. See {guru}, {lord high fixer}. See also
{deep magic}, {heavy wizardry}, {incantation}, {magic},
{mutter}, {rain dance}, {voodoo programming}, {wave a
dead chicken}.

:Wizard Book: n. Hal Abelson and Jerry Sussman's `Structure
and Interpretation of Computer Programs' (MIT Press, 1984; ISBN
0-262-01077-1, an excellent computer science text used in
introductory courses at MIT. So called because of the wizard on
the jacket. One of the {bible}s of the LISP/Scheme
world. Also, less commonly, known as the {Purple Book}.

:wizard mode: [from {rogue}] n. A special access mode of a program or
system, usually passworded, that permits some users godlike
privileges. Generally not used for operating systems themselves
(`root mode' or `wheel mode' would be used instead).

:wizardly: adj. Pertaining to wizards. A wizardly {feature} is one
that only a wizard could understand or use properly.

:womb box: n. 1. [TMRC] Storage space for equipment. 2. [proposed]
A variety of hard-shell equipment case with heavy interior padding
and/or shaped carrier cutouts in a foam-rubber matrix; mundanely
called a `flight case'. Used for delicate test equipment,
electronics, and musical instruments.

:WOMBAT: [Waste Of Money, Brains, And Time] adj. Applied to problems
which are both profoundly {uninteresting} in themselves and
unlikely to benefit anyone interesting even if solved. Often used
in fanciful constructions such as `wrestling with a wombat'. See
also {crawling horror}, {SMOP}. Also note the rather different
usage as a metasyntactic variable in {{Commonwealth Hackish}}.

:wonky: /wong'kee/ [from Australian slang] adj. Yet another
approximate synonym for {broken}. Specifically connotes a
malfunction that produces behavior seen as crazy, humorous, or
amusingly perverse. "That was the day the printer's font logic
went wonky and everybody's listings came out in Tengwar." Also in
`wonked out'. See {funky}, {demented}, {bozotic}.

:woofer: [University of Waterloo] n. Some varieties of wide paper
for printers have a perforation 8.5 inches from the left margin
that allows the excess on the right-hand side to be torn off when
the print format is 80 columns or less wide. The right-hand excess
may be called `woofer'. This term (like {tweeter}, which see)
has been in use at Waterloo since 1972, but is elsewhere unknown.
In audio jargon, the word refers to the bass speaker(s) on a
hi-fi.

:workaround: n. A temporary {kluge} inserted in a system under
development or test in order to avoid the effects of a {bug} or
{misfeature} so that work can continue. Theoretically,
workarounds are always replaced by {fix}es; in practice,
customers often find themselves living with workarounds in the
first couple of releases. "The code died on NUL characters in the
input, so I fixed it to interpret them as spaces." "That's not a
fix, that's a workaround!"

:working as designed: [IBM] adj. 1. In conformance to a wrong or
inappropriate specification; useful, but misdesigned.
2. Frequently used as a sardonic comment on a program's utility.
3. Unfortunately also used as a bogus reason for not accepting a
criticism or suggestion. At {IBM}, this sense is used in
official documents! See {BAD}.

:worm: [from `tapeworm' in John Brunner's novel `The
Shockwave Rider', via XEROX PARC] n. A program that propagates
itself over a network, reproducing itself as it goes. Compare
{virus}. Nowadays the term has negative connotations, as it is
assumed that only {cracker}s write worms. Perhaps the
best-known example was Robert T. Morris's `Internet Worm' of 1988,
a `benign' one that got out of control and hogged hundreds of
Suns and VAXen across the U.S. See also {cracker}, {RTM},
{Trojan horse}, {ice}, and {Great Worm, the}.

:wound around the axle: adj. In an infinite loop. Often used by older
computer types.

:wrap around: vi. (also n. `wraparound' and v. shorthand
`wrap') 1. [techspeak] The action of a counter that starts over
at zero or at `minus infinity' (see {infinity}) after its
maximum value has been reached, and continues incrementing, either
because it is programmed to do so or because of an overflow (as
when a car's odometer starts over at 0). 2. To change {phase}
gradually and continuously by maintaining a steady wake-sleep cycle
somewhat longer than 24 hours, e.g., living six long (28-hour) days
in a week (or, equivalently, sleeping at the rate of
10 microhertz). See also {phase-wrapping}.

:write-only code: [a play on `read-only memory'] n. Code so
arcane, complex, or ill-structured that it cannot be modified or
even comprehended by anyone but its author, and possibly not even
by him/her. A {Bad Thing}.

:write-only language: n. A language with syntax (or semantics)
sufficiently dense and bizarre that any routine of significant size
is {write-only code}. A sobriquet applied occasionally to C and
often to APL, though {INTERCAL} and {TECO} certainly deserve it
more.

:write-only memory: n. The obvious antonym to `read-only
memory'. Out of frustration with the long and seemingly useless
chain of approvals required of component specifications, during
which no actual checking seemed to occur, an engineer at Signetics
once created a specification for a write-only memory and included
it with a bunch of other specifications to be approved. This
inclusion came to the attention of Signetics {management} only
when regular customers started calling and asking for pricing
information. Signetics published a corrected edition of the data
book and requested the return of the `erroneous' ones. Later,
around 1974, Signetics bought a double-page spread in `Electronics'
magazine's April issue and used the spec as an April Fools' Day
joke. Instead of the more conventional characteristic curves, the
25120 "fully encoded, 9046 x N, Random Access, write-only-memory"
data sheet included diagrams of "bit capacity vs. Temp.",
"Iff vs. Vff", "Number of pins remaining vs. number of socket
insertions", and "AQL vs. selling price". The 25120 required a
6.3 VAC VFF supply, a +10V VCC, and VDD of 0V, +/- 2%.

:Wrong Thing: n. A design, action, or decision that is clearly
incorrect or inappropriate. Often capitalized; always emphasized
in speech as if capitalized. The opposite of the {Right Thing};
more generally, anything that is not the Right Thing. In cases
where `the good is the enemy of the best', the merely good ---
although good --- is nevertheless the Wrong Thing. "In C, the
default is for module-level declarations to be visible everywhere,
rather than just within the module. This is clearly the Wrong
Thing."

:wugga wugga: /wuh'g* wuh'g*/ n. Imaginary sound that a computer
program makes as it labors with a tedious or difficult task.
Compare {cruncha cruncha cruncha}, {grind} (sense 4).

:WYSIAYG: /wiz'ee-ayg/ adj. Describes a user interface under
which "What You See Is *All* You Get"; an unhappy variant of
{WYSIWYG}. Visual, `point-and-shoot'-style interfaces tend to
have easy initial learning curves, but also to lack depth; they
often frustrate advanced users who would be better served by a
command-style interface. When this happens, the frustrated user
has a WYSIAYG problem. This term is most often used of editors,
word processors, and document formatting programs. WYSIWYG
`desktop publishing' programs, for example, are a clear win for
creating small documents with lots of fonts and graphics in them,
especially things like newsletters and presentation slides. When
typesetting book-length manuscripts, on the other hand, scale
changes the nature of the task; one quickly runs into WYSIAYG
limitations, and the increased power and flexibility of a
command-driven formatter like TeX or UNIX's `troff(1)' becomes
not just desirable but a necessity.

:WYSIWYG: /wiz'ee-wig/ adj. Describes a user interface under
which "What You See Is What You Get", as opposed to one that uses
more-or-less obscure commands which do not result in immediate
visual feedback. True WYSIWYG in environments supporting multiple
fonts or graphics is a a rarely-attained ideal; there are variants
of this term to express real-world manifestations including
WYSIAWYG (What You See Is *Almost* What You Get) and
WYSIMOLWYG (What You See Is More or Less What You Get). All these
can be mildly derogatory, as they are often used to refer to
dumbed-down {user-friendly} interfaces targeted at
non-programmers; a hacker has no fear of obscure commands (compare
{WYSIAYG}). On the other hand, {EMACS} was one of the very first
WYSIWYG editors, replacing (actually, at first overlaying) the
extremely obscure, command-based {TECO}. See also {WIMP
environment}. [Oddly enough, WYSIWYG has already made it into the
OED, in lower case yet. --- ESR]

= X = =====

:X: /X/ n. 1. Used in various speech and writing contexts (also
in lowercase) in roughly its algebraic sense of `unknown within a
set defined by context' (compare {N}). Thus, the abbreviation
680x0 stands for 68000, 68010, 68020, 68030, or 68040, and 80x86
stands for 80186, 80286 80386 or 80486 (note that a UNIX hacker
might write these as 680[0-4]0 and 80[1-4]86 or 680?0 and 80?86
respectively; see {glob}). 2. [after the name of an earlier
window system called `W'] An over-sized, over-featured,
over-engineered and incredibly over-complicated window system
developed at MIT and widely used on UNIX systems.

:XEROX PARC: The famed Palo Alto Research Center. For more than a
decade, from the early 1970s into the mid-1980s, PARC yielded an
astonishing volume of groundbreaking hardware and software
innovations. The modern mice, windows, and icons style of software
interface was invented there. So was the laser printer, and the
local-area network; and PARC's series of D machines anticipated the
poweful personal computers of the 1980s by a decade. Sadly, these
prophets were without honor in their own company; so much so that
it became a standard joke to describe PARC as a place characterized
by developing brilliant ideas for everyone else.

:XOFF: /X'of/ n. Syn. {control-S}.

:XON: /X'on/ n. Syn. {control-Q}.

:xor: /X'or/, /kzor/ conj. Exclusive or. `A xor B' means
`A or B, but not both'. "I want to get cherry pie xor a
banana split." This derives from the technical use of the term as
a function on truth-values that is true if exactly one of its two
arguments is true.

:xref: /X'ref/ vt., n. Hackish standard abbreviation for
`cross-reference'.

:XXX: /X-X-X/ n. A marker that attention is needed.
Commonly used in program comments to indicate areas that are kluged
up or need to be. Some hackers liken `XXX' to the notional
heavy-porn movie rating.

:xyzzy: /X-Y-Z-Z-Y/, /X-Y-ziz'ee/, /ziz'ee/, or /ik-ziz'ee/
[from the ADVENT game] adj. The {canonical} `magic word'.
This comes from {ADVENT}, in which the idea is to explore an
underground cave with many rooms and to collect the treasures you
find there. If you type `xyzzy' at the appropriate time, you can
move instantly between two otherwise distant points. If,
therefore, you encounter some bit of {magic}, you might remark
on this quite succinctly by saying simply "Xyzzy!" "Ordinarily
you can't look at someone else's screen if he has protected it, but
if you type quadruple-bucky-clear the system will let you do it
anyway." "Xyzzy!" Xyzzy has actually been implemented as an
undocumented no-op command on several OSes; in Data General's
AOS/VS, for example, it would typically respond "Nothing
happens", just as {ADVENT} did if the magic was invoked at the
wrong spot or before a player had performed the action that enabled
the word. In more recent 32-bit versions, by the way, AOS/VS
responds "Twice as much happens". See also {plugh}.

= Y = =====

:YA-: [Yet Another] abbrev. In hackish acronyms this almost
invariably expands to {Yet Another}, following the precedent set
by UNIX `yacc(1)' (Yet Another Compiler-Compiler). See
{YABA}.

:YABA: /ya'b*/ [Cambridge] n. Yet Another Bloody Acronym.
Whenever some program is being named, someone invariably suggests
that it be given a name that is acronymic. The response from those
with a trace of originality is to remark ironically that the
proposed name would then be `YABA-compatible'. Also used in
response to questions like "What is WYSIWYG?" See also
{TLA}.

:YAUN: /yawn/ [Acronym for `Yet Another UNIX Nerd'] n. Reported
from the San Diego Computer Society (predominantly a microcomputer
users' group) as a good-natured punning insult aimed at UNIX
zealots.

:Yellow Book: [proposed] n. The print version of this Jargon File;
`The New Hacker's Dictionary', MIT Press, 1991 (ISBN
0-262-68069-6). Includes all the material in the 2.9.6 version of
the File, plus a Foreword by Guy L. Steele Jr. and a Preface by
Eric S. Raymond. Most importantly, the book version is nicely
typeset and includes almost all of the infamous Crunchly cartoons
by the Great Quux, each attached to an appropriate entry.

:yellow wire: [IBM] n. Repair wires used when connectors
(especially ribbon connectors) got broken due to some schlemiel
pinching them, or to reconnect cut traces after the FE mistakenly
cut one. Compare {blue wire}, {purple wire}, {red wire}.

:Yet Another: adj. [From UNIX's `yacc(1)', `Yet Another
Compiler-Compiler', a LALR parser generator] 1. Of your own work: A
humorous allusion often used in titles to acknowledge that the
topic is not original, though the content is. As in `Yet Another
AI Group' or `Yet Another Simulated Annealing Algorithm'. 2. Of
others' work: Describes something of which there are already far
too many. See also {YA-}, {YABA}, {YAUN}.

:You are not expected to understand this: cav. [UNIX] The canonical
comment describing something {magic} or too complicated to
bother explaining properly. From an infamous comment in the
context-switching code of the V6 UNIX kernel.

:You know you've been hacking too long when...: The set-up line
for a genre of one-liners told by hackers about themselves. These
include the following:

* not only do you check your email more often than your paper
mail, but you remember your {network address} faster than your
postal one.
* your {SO} kisses you on the neck and the first thing you
think is "Uh, oh, {priority interrupt}."
* you go to balance your checkbook and discover that you're
doing it in octal.
* your computers have a higher street value than your car.
* in your universe, `round numbers' are powers of 2, not 10.
* more than once, you have woken up recalling a dream in
some programming language.
* you realize you have never seen half of your best friends.

[An early version of this entry said "All but one of these
have been reliably reported as hacker traits (some of them quite
often). Even hackers may have trouble spotting the ringer." The
ringer was balancing one's checkbook in octal, which I made up out
of whole cloth. Although more respondents picked that one
out as fiction than any of the others, I also received multiple
independent reports of its actually happening. --- ESR]

:Your mileage may vary: cav. [from the standard disclaimer attached
to EPA mileage ratings by American car manufacturers] 1. A ritual
warning often found in UNIX freeware distributions. Translates
roughly as "Hey, I tried to write this portably, but who
*knows* what'll happen on your system?" 2. A qualifier more
generally attached to advice. "I find that sending flowers works
well, but your mileage may vary."

:Yow!: /yow/ [from "Zippy the Pinhead" comix] interj. A favored hacker
expression of humorous surprise or emphasis. "Yow! Check out what
happens when you twiddle the foo option on this display hack!"
Compare {gurfle}.

:yoyo mode: n. The state in which the system is said to be when it
rapidly alternates several times between being up and being down.
Interestingly (and perhaps not by coincidence), many hardware
vendors give out free yoyos at Usenix exhibits.

Sun Microsystems gave out logoized yoyos at SIGPLAN '88. Tourists
staying at one of Atlanta's most respectable hotels were
subsequently treated to the sight of 200 of the country's top
computer scientists testing yo-yo algorithms in the lobby.

:Yu-Shiang Whole Fish: /yoo-shyang hohl fish/ n. obs. The
character gamma (extended SAIL ASCII 0001001), which with a loop in
its tail looks like a little fish swimming down the page. The term
is actually the name of a Chinese dish in which a fish is cooked
whole (not {parse}d) and covered with Yu-Shiang (or Yu-Hsiang)
sauce. Usage: primarily by people on the MIT LISP Machine, which
could display this character on the screen. Tends to elicit
incredulity from people who hear about it second-hand.

= Z = =====

:zap: 1. n. Spiciness. 2. vt. To make food spicy. 3. vt. To make
someone `suffer' by making his food spicy. (Most hackers love
spicy food. Hot-and-sour soup is considered wimpy unless it makes
you wipe your nose for the rest of the meal.) See {zapped}.
4. vt. To modify, usually to correct; esp. used when the action
is performed with a debugger or binary patching tool. Also implies
surgical precision. "Zap the debug level to 6 and run it again."
In the IBM mainframe world, binary patches are applied to programs
or to the OS with a program called `superzap', whose file name is
`IMASPZAP' (possibly contrived from I M A SuPerZAP). 5. vt. To
erase or reset. 6. To {fry} a chip with static electricity.
"Uh oh --- I think that lightning strike may have zapped the disk
controller."

:zapped: adj. Spicy. This term is used to distinguish between food
that is hot (in temperature) and food that is *spicy*-hot.
For example, the Chinese appetizer Bon Bon Chicken is a kind of
chicken salad that is cold but zapped; by contrast, {vanilla}
wonton soup is hot but not zapped. See also {{oriental food}},
{laser chicken}. See {zap}, senses 1 and 2.

:zen: vt. To figure out something by meditation or by a sudden flash
of enlightenment. Originally applied to bugs, but occasionally
applied to problems of life in general. "How'd you figure out the
buffer allocation problem?" "Oh, I zenned it." Contrast {grok},
which connotes a time-extended version of zenning a system.
Compare {hack mode}. See also {guru}.

:zero: vt. 1. To set to 0. Usually said of small pieces of data,
such as bits or words (esp. in the construction `zero out'). 2. To
erase; to discard all data from. Said of disks and directories,
where `zeroing' need not involve actually writing zeroes throughout
the area being zeroed. One may speak of something being
`logically zeroed' rather than being `physically zeroed'. See
{scribble}.

:zero-content: adj. Syn. {content-free}.

:zeroth: /zee'rohth/ adj. First. Among software designers, comes
from C's and LISP's 0-based indexing of arrays. Hardware people
also tend to start counting at 0 instead of 1; this is natural
since, e.g., the 256 states of 8 bits correspond to the binary
numbers 0, 1, ..., 255 and the digital devices known as `counters'
count in this way.

Hackers and computer scientists often like to call the first
chapter of a publication `chapter 0', especially if it is of an
introductory nature (one of the classic instances was in the First
Edition of {K&R}). In recent years this trait has also been
observed among many pure mathematicians (who have an independent
tradition of numbering from 0). Zero-based numbering tends to
reduce {fencepost error}s, though it cannot eliminate them
entirely.

:zigamorph: /zig'*-morf/ n. Hex FF (11111111) when used as a
delimiter or {fence} character. Usage: primarily at IBM
shops.

:zip: [primarily MS-DOS] vt. To create a compressed archive from a
group of files using PKWare's PKZIP or a compatible archiver. Its
use is spreading now that portable implementations of the algorithm
have been written. Commonly used as follows: "I'll zip it up and
send it to you." See {arc}, {tar and feather}.

:zipperhead: [IBM] n. A person with a closed mind.

:zombie: [UNIX] n. A process that has died but has not yet
relinquished its process table slot (because the parent process
hasn't executed a `wait(2)' for it yet). These can be seen in
`ps(1)' listings occasionally. Compare {orphan}.

:zorch: /zorch/ 1. [TMRC] v. To attack with an inverse heat sink.
2. [TMRC] v. To travel, with v approaching c [that
is, with velocity approaching lightspeed --- ESR]. 3. [MIT] v. To
propel something very quickly. "The new comm software is very
fast; it really zorches files through the network." 4. [MIT] n.
Influence. Brownie points. Good karma. The intangible and fuzzy
currency in which favors are measured. "I'd rather not ask him
for that just yet; I think I've used up my quota of zorch with him
for the week." 5. [MIT] n. Energy, drive, or ability. "I think
I'll {punt} that change for now; I've been up for 30 hours
and I've run out of zorch."

:Zork: /zork/ n. The second of the great early experiments in computer
fantasy gaming; see {ADVENT}. Originally written on MIT-DM
during the late 1970s, later distributed with BSD UNIX (as a patched,
sourceless RT-11 Fortran binary; see {retrocomputing}) and
commercialized as `The Zork Trilogy' by Infocom.

:zorkmid: /zork'mid/ n. The canonical unit of currency in
hacker-written games. This originated in {zork} but has spread
to {nethack} and is referred to in several other games.

= [^A-Za-z] (see {regexp}) = ============================

:'Snooze: /snooz/ [FidoNet] n. Fidonews, the weekly official on-line
newsletter of FidoNet. As the editorial policy of Fidonews is
"anything that arrives, we print", there are often large articles
completely unrelated to FidoNet, which in turn tend to elicit
{flamage} in subsequent issues.

:(TM): // [USENET] ASCII rendition of the trademark-superscript symbol
appended to phrases that the author feels should be recorded for
posterity, perhaps in future editions of this lexicon. Sometimes
used ironically as a form of protest against the recent spate of
software and algorithm patents and `look and feel' lawsuits. See
also {UN*X}.

:-oid: [from `android'] suff. 1. This suffix is used as in
mainstream English to indicate a poor imitation, a counterfeit, or
some otherwise slightly bogus resemblance. Hackers will happily
use it with all sorts of non-Greco/Latin stem words that wouldn't
keep company with it in mainstream English. For example, "He's a
nerdoid" means that he superficially resembles a nerd but can't
make the grade; a `modemoid' might be a 300-baud box (Real Modems
run at 9600); a `computeroid' might be any {bitty box}. The
word `keyboid' could be used to describe a {chiclet keyboard},
but would have to be written; spoken, it would confuse the listener
as to the speaker's city of origin. 2. There is a more specific
sense of `oid' as an indicator for `resembling an android'
which in the past has been confined to science-fiction fans and
hackers. It too has recently (in 1991) started to go mainstream
(most notably in the term `trendoid' for victims of terminal
hipness). This is probably traceable to the popularization of the
term {droid} in "Star Wars" and its sequels.

Coinages in both forms have been common in science fiction for at
least fifty years, and hackers (who are often SF fans) have
probably been making `-oid' jargon for almost that long
[though GLS and I can personally confirm only that they were
already common in the mid-1970s --- ESR].

:-ware: [from `software'] suff. Commonly used to form jargon terms
for classes of software. For examples, see {careware},
{crippleware}, {crudware}, {freeware}, {fritterware},
{guiltware}, {liveware}, {meatware}, {payware},
{psychedelicware}, {shareware}, {shelfware}, {vaporware},
{wetware}.

:/dev/null: /dev-nuhl/ [from the UNIX null device, used as a data
sink] n. A notional `black hole' in any information space being
discussed, used, or referred to. A controversial posting, for
example, might end "Kudos to [email protected], flames to
/dev/null". See {bit bucket}.

:0: Numeric zero, as opposed to `O' (the 15th letter of the English
alphabet). In their unmodified forms they look a lot alike, and
various kluges invented to make them visually distinct have
compounded the confusion. If your zero is center-dotted and
letter-O is not, or if letter-O looks almost rectangular but zero
more like an American football stood on end, you're probably
looking at a modern character display (though the dotted zero seems
to have originated as an option on IBM 3270 controllers). If your
zero is slashed but letter-O is not, you're probably looking at an
old-style ASCII graphic set descended from the default typewheel on
the venerable ASR-33 Teletype (Scandinavians, for whom slashed-O is
a letter, curse this arrangement). If letter-O has a slash across
it and the zero does not, your display is tuned for a very old
convention used at IBM and a few other early mainframe makers
(Scandinavians curse *this* arrangement even more, because it
means two of their letters collide). Some Burroughs/Unisys
equipment displays a zero with a *reversed* slash. And yet
another convention common on early line printers left zero
unornamented but added a tail or hook to the letter-O so that it
resembled an inverted Q or cursive capital letter-O. Are we
sufficiently confused yet?

:1TBS: // n. The "One True Brace Style"; see {indent style}.

:120 reset: /wuhn-twen'tee ree'set/ [from 120 volts, U.S. wall
voltage] n. To cycle power on a machine in order to reset or unjam
it. Compare {Big Red Switch}, {power cycle}.

:2: infix. In translation software written by hackers, infix 2 often
represents the syllable *to* with the connotation
`translate to': as in dvi2ps (DVI to PostScript), int2string
(integer to string), and texi2roff (Texinfo to [nt]roff).

:@-party: /at'par`tee/ [from the @-sign in an Internet address]
n. (alt. `@-sign party' /at'si:n par`tee/) A semi-closed
party thrown for hackers at a science-fiction convention (esp.
the annual Worldcon); one must have a {network address} to
get in, or at least be in company with someone who does. One of
the most reliable opportunities for hackers to meet face to face
with people who might otherwise be represented by mere phosphor
dots on their screens. Compare {boink}.

:@Begin: // See {\begin}.

:\begin: // [from the LaTeX command] With \end, used
humorously in writing to indicate a context or to remark on the
surrounded text. For example:

\begin{flame}
Predicate logic is the only good programming
language. Anyone who would use anything else
is an idiot. Also, all computers should be
tredecimal instead of binary.
\end{flame}

The Scribe users at CMU and elsewhere used to use @Begin/@End in
an identical way (LaTeX was built to resemble Scribe). On USENET,
this construct would more frequently be rendered as `<FLAME ON>'
and `<FLAME OFF>'.

:(Lexicon Entries End Here):

:Appendix A: Hacker Folklore ****************************

This appendix contains several legends and fables that illuminate the meaning of various entries in the lexicon.

:The Meaning of `Hack': =======================

"The word {hack} doesn't really have 69 different meanings", according to MIT hacker Phil Agre. "In fact, {hack} has only one meaning, an extremely subtle and profound one which defies articulation. Which connotation is implied by a given use of the word depends in similarly profound ways on the context. Similar remarks apply to a couple of other hacker words, most notably {random}."

Hacking might be characterized as `an appropriate application of ingenuity'. Whether the result is a quick-and-dirty patchwork job or a carefully crafted work of art, you have to admire the cleverness that went into it.

An important secondary meaning of {hack} is `a creative practical joke'. This kind of hack is easier to explain to non-hackers than the programming kind. Of course, some hacks have both natures; see the lexicon entries for {pseudo} and {kgbvax}. But here are some examples of pure practical jokes that illustrate the hacking spirit:

In 1961, students from Caltech (California Institute of Technology,
in Pasadena) hacked the Rose Bowl football game. One student posed
as a reporter and `interviewed' the director of the University of
Washington card stunts (such stunts involve people in the stands
who hold up colored cards to make pictures). The reporter learned
exactly how the stunts were operated, and also that the director
would be out to dinner later.

While the director was eating, the students (who called themselves
the `Fiendish Fourteen') picked a lock and stole a blank direction
sheet for the card stunts. They then had a printer run off 2300
copies of the blank. The next day they picked the lock again and
stole the master plans for the stunts --- large sheets of graph
paper colored in with the stunt pictures. Using these as a guide,
they made new instructions for three of the stunts on the
duplicated blanks. Finally, they broke in once more, replacing the
stolen master plans and substituting the stack of diddled
instruction sheets for the original set.

The result was that three of the pictures were totally different.
Instead of `WASHINGTON', the word ``CALTECH' was flashed. Another
stunt showed the word `HUSKIES', the Washington nickname, but
spelled it backwards. And what was supposed to have been a picture
of a husky instead showed a beaver. (Both Caltech and MIT use the
beaver --- nature's engineer --- as a mascot.)

After the game, the Washington faculty athletic representative
said: "Some thought it ingenious; others were indignant." The
Washington student body president remarked: "No hard feelings, but
at the time it was unbelievable. We were amazed."

This is now considered a classic hack, particularly because revising the direction sheets constituted a form of programming.

Here is another classic hack:

On November 20, 1982, MIT hacked the Harvard-Yale football game.
Just after Harvard's second touchdown against Yale, in the first
quarter, a small black ball popped up out of the ground at the
40-yard line, and grew bigger, and bigger, and bigger. The letters
`MIT' appeared all over the ball. As the players and officials
stood around gawking, the ball grew to six feet in diameter and
then burst with a bang and a cloud of white smoke.

The `Boston Globe' later reported: "If you want to know the truth,
MIT won The Game."