Chapter X: Act IV: Scene I

_The Country. A Hall in_ CHAROMONTE'_s House_.

_Enter_ CHAROMONTE _and_ LIDIA.

_Char._ Daughter, I have observed, since the prince left us,
(Whose absence I mourn with you,) and the visit
Count Sanazarro gave us, you have nourish'd
Sad and retired thoughts, and parted with
That freedom and alacrity of spirit
With which you used to cheer me.

_Lid._ For the count, sir,
All thought of him does with his person die;
But I confess ingenuously, I cannot
So soon forget the choice and chaste delights,
The courteous conversation of the prince,
And without stain, I hope, afforded me,
When he made this house a court.

_Char._ It is in us
To keep it so without him. Want we know not,
And all we can complain of, Heaven be praised for 't,
Is too much plenty; and we will make use of

_Enter_ CAPONI, BERNARDO, PETRUCHIO, _and other Servants_.

All lawful pleasures.--How now, fellows! when
Shall we have this lusty dance?

_Cap._ In the afternoon, sir.
'Tis a device, I wis, of my own making,
And such a one, as shall make your signiorship know
I have not been your butler for nothing, but
Have crotchets in my head. We'll trip it tightly,
And make my sad young mistress merry again,
Or I'll forswear the cellar.

_Bern._ If we had
Our fellow Calandrino here, to dance
His part, we were perfect.

_Pet._ O! he was a rare fellow;
But I fear the court hath spoil'd him.

_Cap._ When I was young,
I could have cut a caper on a pinnacle;
But now I am old and wise.--Keep your figure fair,
And follow but the sample I shall set you,
The duke himself will send for us, and laugh at us;
And that were credit.

_Enter_ CALANDRINO.

_Lid._ Who have we here?

_Cal._ I find
What was brawn in the country, in the court grows tender.
The bots on these jolting jades! I am bruised to jelly.
A coach for my money!

_Char._ Calandrino! 'tis he.

_Cal._ Now to my postures.--Let my hand have the honour
To convey a kiss from my lips to the cover of
Your foot, dear signior.

_Char._ Fie! you stoop too low, sir.

_Cal._ The hem of your vestment, lady: your glove is for princes;
Nay, I have conn'd my distances.

_Lid._ 'Tis most courtly.

_Cap._ Fellow Calandrino!

_Cal._ Signior de Caponi,
Grand botelier of the mansion.

_Bern._ How is 't, man? [_Claps him on the shoulder._

_Cal._ Be not so rustic in your salutations.
Signior Bernardo, master of the accounts.
Signior Petruchio, may you long continue
Your function in the chamber!

_Cap._ When shall we learn
Such gambols in our villa?

_Lid._ Sure he's mad.

_Char._ 'Tis not unlike, for most of such mushrooms are so.
What news at court?

_Cal._ _Basta!_ they are mysteries.
And not to be reveal'd. With your favour, signior,
I am, in private, to confer awhile
With this signora: but I'll pawn my honour,
That neither my terse language, nor my habit,
Howe'er it may convince, nor my new shrugs,
Shall render her enamour'd.

_Char._ Take your pleasure;
A little of these apish tricks may pass,
Too much is tedious. [_Exit._

_Cal._ The prince, in this paper,
Presents his service. Nay, it is not courtly
To see the seal broke open; so I leave you.--
Signiors of the villa, I'll descend to be
Familiar with you.

_Cap._ Have you forgot to dance?

_Cal._ No, I am better'd.

_Pet._ Will you join with us?

_Cal._ As I like the project.
Let me warm my brains first with the richest grape,
And then I'm for you.

_Cap._ We will want no wine.
[_Exeunt all but_ LIDIA.

_Lid._ That this comes only from the best of princes,
With a kind of adoration does command me
To entertain it; and the sweet contents
[_Kissing the letter._
That are inscribed here by his hand must be
Much more than musical to me. All the service
Of my life at no part can deserve this favour.
O, what a virgin longing I feel on me
To unrip the seal, and read it! yet, to break
What he hath fastened, rashly, may appear
A saucy rudeness in me.--I must do it,
(Nor can I else learn his commands, or serve them,)
But with such reverence, as I would open
Some holy writ, whose grave instructions beat down
Rebellious sins, and teach my better part
How to mount upward.--So, [_opens the letter_] 'tis done, and I
With eagle's eyes will curiously peruse it. [_Reads._

_Chaste Lidia, the favours are so great
On me by you conferr'd, that to entreat
The least addition to them, in true sense
May argue me of blushless impudence.
But, such are my extremes, if you deny
A further grace, I must unpitied die.
Haste cuts off circumstance. As you're admired
For beauty; the report of it hath fired
The duke my uncle, and, I fear, you'll prove,
Not with a sacred, but unlawful love.
If he see you as you are, my hoped-for light
Is changed into an everlasting night;
How to prevent it, if your goodness find,
You save two lives, and me you ever bind,
The honourer of your virtues_, GIOVANNI.

Were I more deaf than adders, these sweet charms
Would through my ears find passage to my soul,
And soon enchant it. To save such a prince,
Who would not perish? Virtue in him must suffer,
And piety be forgotten. The duke's passion,
Though it raged more than Tarquin's, shall not reach me.
All quaint inventions of chaste virgins aid me!
My prayers are heard; I have 't. The duke ne'er saw me--
Or, if that fail, I am again provided--
But for the servants!--They will take what form
I please to put upon them. Giovanni,
Be safe; thy servant Lidia assures it.
Let mountains of afflictions fall on me,
Their weight is easy, so I set thee free. [_Exit._

SCENE II.

_Another Room in the same._

_Enter_ COZIMO, GIOVANNI, SANAZARRO, CHAROMONTE, _and Attendants_.

_Sanaz._ Are you not tired with travel, sir?

_Coz._ No, no;
I am fresh and lusty.

_Char._ This day shall be ever
A holiday to me, that brings my prince
Under my humble roof. [_Weeps._

_Giov._ See, sir, my good tutor
Sheds tears for joy.

_Coz._ Dry them up, Charomonte;
And all forbear the room, while we exchange
Some private words together.

_Giov._ O, my lord,
How grossly have we overshot ourselves!

_Sanaz._ In what, sir?

_Giov._ In forgetting to acquaint
My guardian with our purpose: all that Lidia
Can do avails us nothing, if the duke
Find out the truth from him.

_Sanaz._ 'Tis now past help,
And we must stand the hazard:--hope the best, sir.
[_Exeunt_ GIOVANNI, SANAZARRO, _and Attendants_.

_Char._ My loyalty doubted, sir!

_Coz._ 'Tis more. Thou hast
Abused our trust, and in a high degree
Committed treason.

_Char._ Treason! 'Tis a word
My innocence understands not. Were my breast
Transparent, and my thoughts to be discern'd,
Not one spot shall be found to taint the candour
Of my allegiance: and I must be bold
To tell you, sir, (for he that knows no guilt
Can know no fear,) 'tis tyranny to o'ercharge
An honest man; and such, till now, I've lived,
And such, my lord, I'll die.

_Coz._ Sir, do not flatter
Yourself with hope, these great and glorious words,
Which every guilty wretch, as well as you,
That's arm'd with impudence, can with ease deliver,
And with as full a mouth, can work on us:
Nor shall gay flourishes of language clear
What is in fact apparent.

_Char._ Fact! what fact?
You, that know only what it is, instruct me,
For I am ignorant.

_Coz._ This, then, sir: We gave up,
On our assurance of your faith and care,
Our nephew Giovanni, nay, our heir
In expectation, to be train'd up by you
As did become a prince.

_Char._ And I discharged it:
Is this the treason?

_Coz._ Take us with you, sir[82].
And, in respect we knew his youth was prone
To women, and that, living in our court,
He might make some unworthy choice, before
His weaker judgment was confirm'd, we did
Remove him from it; constantly presuming,
You, with your best endeavours, rather would
Have quench'd those heats in him, than light a torch,
As you have done, to his looseness.

_Char._ I! my travail
Is ill requited, sir; for, by my soul,
I was so curious that way, that I granted
Access to none could tempt him; nor did ever
One syllable, or obscene accent, touch
His ear, that might corrupt him.

_Coz._ No! Why, then,
With your allowance, did you give free way
To all familiar privacy between
My nephew and your daughter? Or why did you
(Had you no other ends in 't but our service)
Read to them, and together, as they had been
Scholars of one form, grammar, rhetoric,
Philosophy, story[83], and interpret to them
The close temptations of lascivious poets?
Or wherefore, for we still had spies upon you,
Was she still present, when, by your advice,
He was taught the use of his weapon, horsemanship,
Nay, wrestling, but to fan a love in her?
And then, forsooth, his exercises ended,
A fair pretence of recreation for him,
(When Lidia was instructed in those graces
That add to beauty,) he, brought to admire her,
Must hear her sing, while to her voice her hand
Made ravishing music; and, this applauded, dance
A light lavolta[84] with her.

_Char._ Have you ended
All you can charge me with?

_Coz._ Nor stopt you there,
But they must unattended walk into
The silent groves, and hear the amorous birds
Warbling their wanton notes; here, a sure shade
Of barren sicamores, which the all-seeing sun
Could not pierce through; near that, an arbour hung
With spreading eglantine; there, a bubbling spring
Watering a bank of hyacinths and lilies;
With all allurements that could move to love.
And could this, Charomonte, (should I grant
They had been equals both in birth and fortune,)
Become your gravity? nay, 'tis clear as air,
That your ambitious hopes to match your daughter
Into our family, gave connivance to it:
And this, though not in act, in the intent
I call high treason.

_Char._ Hear my just defence, sir;
And, though you are my prince, it will not take from
Your greatness, to acknowledge with a blush,
In this my accusation you have been
More sway'd by spleen, and jealous suppositions,
Than certain grounds of reason. You had a father,
(Blest be his memory!) that made frequent proofs
Of my loyalty and faith, and, would I boast
The dangers I have broke through in his service,
I could say more. Nay, you yourself, dread sir,
Whenever I was put unto the test,
Found me true gold, and not adulterate metal;
And am I doubted now?

_Coz._ This is from the purpose.

_Char._ I will come to it, sir: Your grace well knew,
Before the prince's happy presence made
My poor house rich, the chiefest blessing which
I gloried in, though now it prove a curse,
Was an only daughter. Nor did you command me,
As a security to your future fears,
To cast her off: which had you done, howe'er
She was the light of my eyes, and comfort of
My feeble age, so far I prized my duty
Above affection, she now had been
A stranger to my care. But she is fair!
Is that her fault, or mine? Did ever father
Hold beauty in his issue for a blemish?
You may, if you think fit, before my face,
In recompense of all my watchings for you,
With burning corrosives transform her to
An ugly leper. This I will rather suffer, sir,
Than live suspected by you.

_Coz._ Let not passion
Carry you beyond your reason.

_Char._ I am calm, sir;
Yet you must give me leave to grieve I find
My actions misinterpreted. Alas! sir,
Was Lidia's desire to serve the prince
Call'd an offence? or did she practise to
Seduce his youth, because with her best zeal
And fervour she endeavour'd to attend him?
'Tis a hard construction. Though she be my daughter,
I may thus far speak her: from her infancy
She was ever civil, her behaviour nearer
Simplicity than craft; and malice dares not
Affirm, in one loose gesture, or light language,
She gave a sign she was in thought unchaste.
I'll fetch her to you, sir; and but look on her
With equal eyes, you must in justice grant
That your suspicion wrongs her.

_Coz._ It may be;
But I must have stronger assurance of it
Than passionate words: and, not to trifle time,
As we came unexpected to your house,
We will prevent all means that may prepare her
How to answer that with which we come to charge her.
And howsoever it may be received
As a foul breach to hospitable rites,
On thy allegiance and boasted faith,
Nay, forfeit of thy head, we do confine thee
Close prisoner to thy chamber till all doubts
Are clear'd that do concern us.

_Char._ I obey, sir,
And wish your grace had followed my hearse
To my sepulchre, my loyalty unsuspected,
Rather than now----But I am silent, sir,
And let that speak my duty[85]. [_Exit._

I can't perceive the deficiency

_Coz._ If this man
Be false, disguised treachery ne'er put on
A shape so near to truth. Within, there!

_Re-enter_ GIOVANNI _and_ SANAZARRO, _ushering in_ PETRONELLA. CALANDRINO _and others setting forth a Banquet_.

_Sanaz._ Sir.

_Coz._ Bring Lidia forth.

_Giov._ She comes, sir, of herself,
To present her service to you.

_Coz._ Ha! This personage
Cannot invite affection.

_Sanaz._ See you keep state.

_Petron._ I warrant you.

_Coz._ The manners of her mind
Must be transcendent, if they can defend
Her rougher outside. May we with your liking
Salute you, lady?

_Petron._ Let me wipe my mouth, sir,
With my cambric handkerchief, and then have at you.

_Coz._ Can this be possible?

_Sanaz._ Yes, sir; you will find her
Such as I gave her to you.

_Petron._ Will your dukeship
Sit down and eat some sugar-plums? Here's a castle
Of march-pane[86] too; and this quince-marmalade was
Of my own making; all summ'd up together,
Did cost the setting on: and here is wine too,
As good as e'er was tapp'd. I'll be your taster,
For I know the fashion. [_Drinks all off._]--Now
you must do me right, sir;
You shall nor will nor choose.

_Giov._ She's very simple.

_Coz._ Simple! 'tis worse. Do you drink thus often, lady?

_Petron._ Still when I am thirsty, and eat when I am hungry:
Such junkets come not every day. Once more to you,
With a heart and a half, i' faith.

_Coz._ Pray you, pause a little.

_Petron._ Then I'll drink for you.

_Coz._ I'll find you out a pledge
That shall supply my place: what think you of
This complete signior? You are a Juno,
And in such state must feast this Jupiter:
What think you of him?

_Petron._ I desire no better.

_Coz._ And you will undertake this service for me?
You are good at the sport.

_Cal._ Who, I? a piddler, sir.

_Coz._ Nay, you shall sit enthroned, and eat and drink
As you were a duke.

_Cal._ If your grace will have me,
I'll eat and drink like an emperor.

_Coz._ Take your place, then:
[CALANDRINO _takes the duke's chair_.
We are amazed.

_Giov._ This is gross; nor can the imposture
But be discover'd.

_Sanaz._ The duke is too sharp-sighted
To be deluded thus.

_Cal._ Nay, pray you eat fair;
Or divide, and I will choose. Cannot you use
Your fork, as I do? Gape, and I will feed you.
[_Feeds her._
Gape wider yet; this is courtlike.

_Petron._ To choke daws with:----
I like it not.

_Cal._ But you like this?

_Petron._ Let it come, boy. [_They drink._

_Coz._ What a sight is this! We could be angry with you.
How much you did belie her when you told us
She was only simple! this is barbarous rudeness,
Beyond belief.

_Giov._ I would not speak her, sir,
Worse than she was.

_Sanaz._ And I, my lord, chose rather
To deliver her better parted[87] than she is,
Than to take from her.

_Enter_ CAPONI, _with his fellow-servants for the dance_.

_Cap._ Ere I'll lose my dance,
I'll speak to the purpose. I am, sir, no prologue;
But in plain terms must tell you we are provided
Of a lusty hornpipe.

_Coz._ Prithee let us have it,
For we grow dull.

_Cap._ But to make up the medley,
For it is of several colours, we must borrow
Your grace's ghost here.

_Cal._ Pray you, sir, depose me;
It will not do else. I am, sir, the engine
[_Rises, and resigns his chair._
By which it moves.

_Petron._ I will dance with my duke too;
I will not out.

_Coz._ Begin then.--[_They dance._]--There's more in this
Than yet I have discover'd. Some Oedipus
Resolve this riddle.

_Petron._ Did I not foot it roundly? [_Falls._

_Coz._ As I live, stark drunk! away with her. We'll reward you
[_Exeunt Servants with_ PETRONELLA.
When you have cool'd yourselves in the cellar.

_Cap._ Heaven preserve you!

_Coz._ We pity Charomonte's wretched fortune
In a daughter, nay, a monster. Good old man!--
The place grows tedious; our remove shall be
With speed: we'll only, in a word or two,
Take leave, and comfort him.

_Sanaz._ 'Twill rather, sir,
Increase his sorrow, that you know his shame;
Your grace may do it by letter.

_Coz._ Who sign'd you
A patent to direct us? Wait our coming,
In the garden.

_Giov._ All will out.

_Sanaz._ I more than fear it.
[_Exeunt_ GIOVANNI _and_ SANAZARRO.

_Coz._ These are strange chimeras to us: what to judge of 't,
Is past our apprehension. One command
Charomonte to attend us. [_Exit an Attendant._]
Can it be
That Contarino could be so besotted,
As to admire this prodigy! or her father
To dote upon it! Or does she personate,
For some ends unknown to us, this rude behaviour,
Which, in the scene presented, would appear
Ridiculous and impossible?--O, you are welcome.

_Enter_ CHAROMONTE.

We now acknowledge the much wrong we did you
In our unjust suspicion. We have seen
The wonder, sir, your daughter.

_Char._ And have found her
Such as I did report her. What she wanted
In courtship[88], was, I hope, supplied in civil
And modest entertainment.

_Coz._ Pray you, tell us,
And truly, we command you--Did you never
Observe she was given to drink?

_Char._ To drink, sir!

_Coz._ Dare you trust your own eyes, if you find her now
More than distemper'd?

_Char._ I will pull them out, sir,
If your grace can make this good. And if you please
To grant me liberty, as she is I'll fetch her,
And in a moment.

_Coz._ Look you do, and fail not,
On the peril of your head.

_Char._ Drunk!--She disdains it. [_Exit._

_Coz._ Such contrarieties were never read of.
Charomonte is no fool; nor can I think
His confidence built on sand. We are abused,
'Tis too apparent.

_Re-enter_ CHAROMONTE, _with_ LIDIA.

_Lid._ I am indisposed, sir;
And that life you once tender'd, much endanger'd
In forcing me from my chamber.

_Char._ Here she is, sir;
Suddenly sick, I grant; but sure, not drunk:
Speak to my lord the duke.

_Lid._ All is discover'd. [_Kneels._

_Coz._ Is this your only daughter?

_Char._ And my heir, sir;
Nor keep I any woman in my house
(Unless for sordid offices) but one
I do maintain, trimm'd up in her cast habits,
To make her sport: and she, indeed, loves wine,
And will take too much of it; and, perhaps, for mirth,
She was presented to you.

_Coz._ It shall yield
No sport to the contrivers. 'Tis too plain now.
Her presence does confirm what Contarino
Deliver'd of her; nor can sickness dim
The splendour of her beauties: being herself, then,
She must exceed his praise.

_Lid._ Will your grace hear me?
I'm faint, and can say little.

_Coz._ Here are accents
Whose every syllable is musical!
Pray you, let me raise you, and awhile rest here.
False Sanazarro, treacherous Giovanni!
But stand we talking!----

_Char._ Here's a storm soon raised.

_Coz._ As thou art our subject, Charomonte, swear
To act what we command.

_Char._ That is an oath
I long since took.

_Coz._ Then, by that oath we charge thee,
Without excuse, denial, or delay,
To apprehend, and suddenly, Sanazarro,
And our ingrateful nephew. We have said it.
Do it without reply, or we pronounce thee,
Like them, a traitor to us. See them guarded
In several lodgings, and forbid access
To all, but when we warrant. Is our will
Heard sooner than obey'd?

_Char._ These are strange turns;
But I must not dispute them. [_Exit._

_Coz._ Be severe in 't.--
O my abused lenity! from what height
Is my power fall'n!

_Lid._ O me most miserable!
That, being innocent, makes others guilty.
Most gracious prince----

_Coz._ Pray you rise, and then speak to me.

_Lid._ My knees shall first be rooted in this earth,
And, Myrrha-like, I'll grow up to a tree,
Dropping perpetual tears of sorrow, which
Harden'd by the rough wind, and turn'd to amber,
Unfortunate virgins like myself shall wear,
Before I'll make petition to your greatness,
But with such reverence, my hands held up thus,
As I would do to heaven. You princes are
As gods on earth to us, and to be sued to
With such humility, as his deputies
May challenge from their vassals.

_Coz._ Here's that form
Of language I expected; pray you, speak:
What is your suit?

_Lid._ That you look upon me
As an humble thing, that millions of degrees
Is placed beneath you: for what am I, dread sir,
Or what can fall in the whole course of my life,
That may be worth your care, much less your trouble?
As the lowly shrub is to the lofty cedar,
Or a molehill to Olympus, if compared,
I am to you, sir. Or, suppose the prince,
(Which cannot find belief in me,) forgetting
The greatness of his birth and hopes, hath thrown
An eye of favour on me, in me punish,
That am the cause, the rashness of his youth.
Shall the queen of the inhabitants of the air,
The eagle, that bears thunder on her wings,
In her angry mood destroy her hopeful young,
For suffering a wren to perch too near them?
Such is our disproportion.

_Coz._ With what fervour
She pleads against herself!

_Lid._ For me, poor maid,
I know the prince to be so far above me,
That my wishes cannot reach him. Yet I am
So much his creature, that, to fix him in
Your wonted grace and favour, I'll abjure
His sight for ever, and betake myself
To a religious life, (where in my prayers
I may remember him,) and ne'er see man more,
But my ghostly father. Will you trust me, sir?
In truth I'll keep my word; or, if this fail,
A little more of fear what may befall him
Will stop my breath for ever.

_Coz._ Had you thus argued [_Raises her._
As you were yourself, and brought as advocates
Your health and beauty to make way for you,
No crime of his could put on such a shape
But I should look with the eyes of mercy on it.
What would I give to see this diamond
In her perfect lustre, as she was before
The clouds of sickness dimm'd it! Yet, take comfort;
And, as you would obtain remission for
His treachery to me, cheer your drooping spirits,
And call the blood again into your cheeks,
And then plead for him; and in such a habit
As in your highest hopes you would put on,
If we were to receive you for our bride.

_Lid._ I'll do my best, sir.

_Coz._ And that best will be
A crown of all felicity to me. [_Exeunt._

FOOTNOTES:

[82] _Take us with you, sir._] i. e. _understand our meaning fully,
before you form your conclusions_: this expression is common to
all our old writers.

[83] _Story_,] i. e. _history_. The two words were formerly synonymous.

[84] _Lavolta_,] i. e. _the waltz_. This dance, originally imported
from Italy, was a great favourite with our ancestors.

[85] This scene is exquisitely written. It must, however, be
confessed, that Charomonte's justification of himself is less
complete than might be expected from one who had so good a cause
to defend.--GIFFORD.

[86] _March-pane_,] a cake composed of sugar and almonds.

[87] _Parted_,] i. e. _gifted_ or _endowed with parts_.

It seems to have been the opinion of Massinger and his fellow
dramatists, that no play could succeed without the admission of
some kind of farcical interlude among the graver scenes. If the
dramas of our author be intimately considered, few will be found
without some extraneous mummery of this description; and, indeed,
nothing but a persuasion of the nature which I have just mentioned
could give birth to the poor mockery before us. As a trick, it is
so gross and palpable, that the duke could not have been deceived
by it for a moment; (to do him justice, he frequently hints his
suspicions;) and as a piece of humour, it is so low, and even
disagreeable, that I cannot avoid regretting a proper regard for
his characters had not prevented the author from adopting it on
the present occasion.--GIFFORD.

[88] _Courtship_,] i. e. _the grace and elegance of a court_.