Chapter II: Act II

_The scene is the hall of_ MRS. LANCASTER’S _house, about forty miles from London._

_When the curtain rises it is just after dinner on the Sunday of the week-end party--the gramophone is going and there is a continual buzz of conversation._ CLARA HIBBERT, _an emaciated soprano, is dancing with_ TOM VERYAN, HELEN _with_ PAWNIE, _and_ NICKY _with_ BUNTY. FLORENCE _is seated on the club fender, talking intellectually with_ BRUCE FAIRLIGHT, _an earnest dramatist, the squalor of whose plays is much appreciated by those who live in comparative luxury_.

_There must be a feeling of hectic amusement and noise, and the air black with cigarette smoke and superlatives. During the first part of the scene everyone must appear to be talking at once, but the actual lines spoken while dancing must be timed to reach the audience as the speakers pass near the footlights. This scene will probably be exceedingly difficult to produce, but is absolutely indispensable._

HELEN

It’s much too fast, Nicky.

TOM

Do slow down a bit.

NICKY

It’s the pace that’s marked on the record.

PAWNIE

I’ve never danced well since the War, I don’t know why.

FLORENCE

But your last act was so strong, when she came in half mad with fright and described everything minutely.

BRUCE

I try to write as _honestly_ as possible.

CLARA

I gave her three for manners, but seven for charm, because I had to be a _little_ nice!

TOM

I thought she was rather a decent sort.

BUNTY

No, but really, Nicky, his technique completely annihilated his inspiration.

NICKY

Not with Debussy and Ravel, with the older masters, yes; but he’s probably tired of them.

BUNTY

That’s so stupid, I think.

HELEN

My dear, it was the most “chic” thing you’ve ever seen, but unfortunately the wrong color.

PAWNIE

Marion Ferris had that Poiret model copied in the most frightful blue!

CLARA

I believe my shoe’s coming off.

TOM

Shall we stop?

CLARA

No, it’s all right.

FLORENCE

I wonder if you could gouge this cigarette-end out of the holder for me?

BRUCE

I’ll try. [_He does so._] I always smoke a pipe when I’m working.

FLORENCE

How soothing!

BUNTY

I suppose one can never really judge properly from a recital.

NICKY

Not with him, because he’s not dramatic enough.

BUNTY

Dramatic pianists make me uncomfortable.

HELEN

Pawnie, your tongue grows more venomous every day.

PAWNIE

[_Giggling_]

Well, I had to say something--anyhow, it was true.

HELEN

Especially about her ankles.

PAWNIE

My dear, yes!

[_They both laugh._]

[_The record comes to an end, and_ NICKY _begins to change it.
Everyone talks and laughs._]

CLARA

You must come next Sunday week.

TOM

Thanks awfully, I’d love to.

CLARA

I’m only singing ballads, but you know what Sunday concerts are.

TOM

Oh yes, rather.

CLARA

[_To_ NICKY]

What’s on the other side?

NICKY

“You’ve got the cutest ears and eyes and nose.”

PAWNIE

Do put on “Spoony Moon in Upper Carolina.”

HELEN

No, don’t put it on, Nicky; play it yourself; you always make the gramophone go too quickly.

BUNTY

Yes, go on, Nicky.

FLORENCE

[_Refusing_ BRUCE’S _offer of a cigarette_]

No, thanks, not another--I’m dancing with Tom.

BUNTY

[_Gayly_]

Missing one, Tom.

TOM

Righto!

[NICKY _commences to play a fox-trot_.]

BUNTY

[_Dragging_ BRUCE _to his feet_]

Come on, Mr. Fairlight, don’t overdo the serious dramatist stunt!

BRUCE

I warn you I’m no good.

[_He dances with her, and confirms the truth of his warning._
CLARA HIBBERT _squashes down on the piano-seat next to_ NICKY
_and endeavors with one finger in the treble to follow the
tune he is playing_. HELEN _and_ PAWNIE _stand right down
close to the footlights, smoking and talking; their backs
are half turned to the audience, but their remarks must be
perfectly audible_.]

HELEN

Tom Veryan doesn’t dance as well as he thinks he does.

PAWNIE

With that figure he ought to be marvelous.

HELEN

He’s too athletic.

PAWNIE

Anyhow, I’m sure he’s a success at the Bath Club.

HELEN

Doesn’t Florence look astounding?

PAWNIE

Absolutely. She knows exactly what suits her.

HELEN

Where’s David?

PAWNIE

He went off to his study to smoke.

HELEN

I do wish Florence wouldn’t be irritable with him in front of everybody. I felt acutely uncomfortable at dinner.

PAWNIE

It makes Nicky furious as a rule, but to-night he was too occupied with that stupid little fool Bunty Mainwaring to take any notice.

HELEN

She’s an excellent type.

PAWNIE

Very average; I only hope nothing will come of Nicky’s mania for her.

HELEN

I don’t think we need worry.

PAWNIE

Why?

HELEN

Wait and see, my dear.

CLARA

[_Leaving_ NICKY _at the piano and advancing on_ PAWNIE]

Come and dance, Pawnie, and tell me how divinely I sang on Tuesday.

PAWNIE

[_Agreeably_]

You didn’t.

CLARA

Ten for cruelty.

[_They start to dance._ HELEN _moves over to the mantelpiece
for a cigarette_.]

HELEN

Have you a match, Nicky?

NICKY

Isn’t this a marvelous tune?

HELEN

Fascinating! [_She goes over and sits next to him. Gently slipping her hand into his coat pocket._] Darling, I _do_ want a match. [_She brings out a little box._] What a divine little box!

[NICKY _stops playing and jumps up_.]

NICKY

[_Violently_]

Helen, give that to me!----

[_Everyone stops dancing._]

CLARA

Nicky dear, _don’t_ be tiresome.

NICKY

[_Recovering himself._]

I’m sick of playing. Let’s have the gramophone again. [_To_ HELEN.] Here’s a light, dearie.

[_He takes match-box out of another pocket and lights_ HELEN’S
_cigarette. She looks at him queerly for a moment, then he
restarts the gramophone and everyone begins to dance again
except_ HELEN _and_ BRUCE FAIRLIGHT. HELEN _goes over to the
fireplace and takes a coffee-cup from the mantelpiece_.]

HELEN

Whose coffee is this? Some one drank mine, and I’d hardly touched it.

BRUCE

If it had no sugar in it, it’s mine.

HELEN

[_Draining it_]

It had no sugar in it.

FLORENCE

You’re dancing abominably, Tom.

TOM

Oh, Am I?

FLORENCE

What’s the matter with you?

TOM

I don’t know. I suppose I’m tired.

FLORENCE

You’re not usually tired when you’re dancing with me.

TOM

Oh, Florence, don’t nag!

FLORENCE

How dare you speak to me like that?

[_She stops dancing and goes over to the fireplace_.]

TOM

[_Following her_]

I say, Florence--I’m sorry----

PAWNIE

Let’s stop the music for a moment and think of something really marvelous to do.

BUNTY

No, let’s go on dancing.

CLARA

I’m exhausted.

PAWNIE

[_Stopping the gramophone_]

What was that divine game we played coming back from Paris, Helen?

HELEN

Just ordinary “Clumps,” wasn’t it?

BUNTY

I loathe “Clumps.”

NICKY

What about the History game?

BRUCE

What’s that?

BUNTY

Oh no, Nicky; it’s too intellectual.

FLORENCE

There’s a Mah-Jong set in the drawing-room.

PAWNIE

How divine! Let’s make up a table immediately.

CLARA

I won’t be happy until some one gives me a set made entirely of jade.

NICKY

Come on, Bunty.

BUNTY

[_Looking at_ TOM]

I can’t play it.

NICKY

You can; you used to play in Paris with Yvonne.

BUNTY

I’ve forgotten it.

NICKY

You’ll soon remember again.

[_He drags her off._]

PAWNIE

Come along, Clara.

CLARA

I insist on Mr. Fairlight learning.

BRUCE

I’m afraid I’m no good at that sort of thing.

CLARA

You’ll be able to put it in one of your plays.

PAWNIE

Come and watch; it’s too thrilling for words.

[CLARA, BRUCE _and_ PAWNIE _go off_.]

HELEN

Have you only one set, Florence?

FLORENCE

Yes. Isn’t it maddening? Clara promised to bring hers down, but forgot.

HELEN

Does Bruce Fairlight play Bridge?

FLORENCE

No, I don’t think so.

HELEN

Dramatists are such a comfort in a house party, aren’t they?

[_She goes off._]

TOM

Are you coming, Florence?

FLORENCE

No.

TOM

[_Nonplussed_]

Oh!

FLORENCE

But please don’t let me stop _you_ going. I’m sure you’re _dying_ to be with the others.

TOM

I say, Florence, I wish you wouldn’t go on like that.

FLORENCE

I don’t know what’s the matter with you; you’ve never behaved like this before.

TOM

I haven’t behaved like anything.

FLORENCE

You’ve been exceedingly rude to me, both at dinner and afterwards.

TOM

I wasn’t at dinner.

FLORENCE

Yes, you were; you snapped me up when I said I didn’t like Elsie Saunders.

TOM

You know perfectly well she’s a friend of mine.

FLORENCE

Well, she oughtn’t to be, after the things she’s said about me.

TOM

You will go on imagining.

FLORENCE

Nothing of the sort--I _know_! If you weren’t so dense you’d see, too--the jealousy I have to put up with. I get so tired of it all, so desperately tired.

[_She becomes a little pathetic._]

TOM

Talk about being different, you’re different too----

FLORENCE

I’m unhappy.

TOM

Why?

FLORENCE

Because I hate to see you being put against me.

TOM

Florence!

FLORENCE

You’ll understand one day. They’re all very subtle, but I can see.

TOM

Nobody’s said a word to me about you; they’d better not try.

FLORENCE

Why, what would you do?

TOM

I’d--I’d be furious.

FLORENCE

Oh!

TOM

And I’d let them see it, too.

FLORENCE

[_Holding out her hands_]

Tom----

TOM

Yes?

FLORENCE

I forgive you.

TOM

I can’t bear you being angry with me.

FLORENCE

Can’t you, really?

TOM

It makes me feel beastly.

FLORENCE

Come and sit here.

TOM

[_Sitting next to her on the club fender_]

That’s a lovely dress.

FLORENCE

It is sweet, isn’t it?

TOM

You always wear wonderful clothes.

FLORENCE

Do I, Tom?

TOM

You know you do.

FLORENCE

Do you remember the very first time we met?

TOM

Rather.

FLORENCE

Oxford’s so full of romance, isn’t it?

TOM

It was when you came down.

FLORENCE

Thank you, Tom dear.

TOM

We did have fun.

FLORENCE

You used to come up to _matinées_, and I’d motor you back afterwards.

TOM

Ripping!

FLORENCE

That reminds me, I’ve got seats for “Rolling Stones” on Tuesday. Don’t forget.

TOM

You never said you were going to get them.

FLORENCE

It doesn’t matter. I thought I did. We’d better dine at Claridges.

TOM

But, Florence, I--I can’t come!

FLORENCE

Why not?

TOM

I promised to go out.

FLORENCE

Who with?

TOM

Mother.

FLORENCE

Can’t you put her off? It will be such a good first night.

TOM

Well--you see, as a matter of fact--it’s rather awkward. I put her off the other day----

[_There is a slight pause._]

FLORENCE

[_A trifle coldly_]

Oh, well, never mind, we’ll go some other night.

[_Enter_ DAVID.]

DAVID

Hallo, Florence! I thought you were in the drawing-room.

FLORENCE

They’re playing Mah-Jong, and there’s only one set. I shall break in presently.

TOM

I’ll just go and see how they’re getting on.

[_This obvious excuse for getting out of the room is not lost
upon_ FLORENCE.]

FLORENCE

Yes, do.

TOM

Come and play soon.

[_He goes out quietly._]

FLORENCE

Don’t you think this is a divine frock?

DAVID

Very pretty.

FLORENCE

You and Helen seemed to be very thick at dinner. What were you talking about?

DAVID

Nothing much. I like Helen.

FLORENCE

Only because she flatters you and listens to everything you say.

DAVID

She doesn’t flatter me.

FLORENCE

I suppose she was talking about the farm, and giving her opinions.

DAVID

We did discuss the farm a little.

FLORENCE

She doesn’t know a thing about it, really.

DAVID

Perhaps not, but it passed the time.

[_He goes out._]

[FLORENCE _sits still for a moment, then she wearily buries
her face in her hands. Enter_ NICKY.]

NICKY

[_Going to her_]

What’s the matter, darling?

FLORENCE

Nothing. I’ve got a slight headache.

NICKY

Why don’t you go Byes?

FLORENCE

I can’t; it’s much too early.

NICKY

I’m sick of Mah-Jong.

FLORENCE

Who’s playing now?

NICKY

Pawnie and Helen and Clara are trying to teach Bruce Fairlight; he’s an awful fool at it.

[_He sits down at the piano and plays absently._]

FLORENCE

You must get Bunty out of that habit of contradicting everything people say.

NICKY

I don’t see why.

FLORENCE

It’s bad breeding.

NICKY

[_Striking a note viciously_]

Who cares nowadays? We’ve all got a right to our opinions.

FLORENCE

She seems to forget that I’m much older than she is.

NICKY

That’s no argument, mother; it’s silly only to remember your age when some one says something you don’t like.

FLORENCE

She’s having a bad effect on you.

NICKY

Nonsense!

FLORENCE

You’ve changed since Paris.

NICKY

Naturally.

FLORENCE

You never used to be rude to me.

NICKY

Oh, damn, I’m not rude.

FLORENCE

Yes, you are.

NICKY

Well, don’t start running down Bunty.

FLORENCE

Stop playing--stop playing!

NICKY

[_Getting up angrily_]

Oh, God!

[_He goes towards door and collides with_ HELEN.]

HELEN

What’s happening?

FLORENCE

Nothing. Bunty’s just putting Nicky against me. I knew she’d try to.

[_She goes out._]

HELEN

You must be having a delightful evening! You leave the drawing-room, having rowed with Bunty, and come here and row with Florence.

NICKY

Mother’s impossible.

HELEN

She’s no different from what she’s always been.

NICKY

Well, I haven’t realized it before.

HELEN

[_Taking a cigarette and lighting it_]

You haven’t been engaged before.

NICKY

I’m hating this house party.

HELEN

[_Lightly_]

Don’t say that, dear; it’s not kind.

NICKY

You know I don’t mean you.

HELEN

Are you very much in love?

NICKY

Yes.--No.--I don’t know.

HELEN

I wonder.

NICKY

It’s utterly devastating, anyhow.

HELEN

When did you meet her?

NICKY

About five months ago.

HELEN

What was she doing in Paris?

NICKY

Oh, I don’t know--fooling about.

HELEN

Splendid.

NICKY

She’s been studying French literature.

HELEN

Why?

NICKY

She’s going to write--herself--some day.

HELEN

Oh, I see!

NICKY

Helen, do you like her?

HELEN

I can’t tell yet--yesterday was the first time I’d ever set eyes on her.

NICKY

She’s wonderfully intelligent.

HELEN

Yes--I’m sure she is.

NICKY

You _don’t_ like her?

HELEN

I tell you--I’m not sure yet.

NICKY

It’s generally the way--one’s friends always hate one another.

HELEN

[_Smiling_]

It _is_ difficult for you, isn’t it?

NICKY

I should so like you to like her.

HELEN

Very well--I’ll try.

NICKY

She’s utterly opposite to me in every way.

HELEN

Yes, I see that.

NICKY

But that’s as it ought to be, isn’t it?

HELEN

It depends.

NICKY

I need a sort of restraining influence terribly.

HELEN

Yes, Nicky.

NICKY

She’s awfully good for me.

HELEN

Is she?

NICKY

Yes--she curbs me when I get temperamental and silly.

HELEN

I always felt you needed encouraging more than curbing.

NICKY

[_Laughing_]

Oh, Helen--aren’t you a darling!

HELEN

I mean it.

NICKY

You’re wrong, though--I’m all over the place.

HELEN

Anyhow, I do hope you’ll be very happy with her.

NICKY

I don’t suppose I shall ever be that. I haven’t got the knack.

HELEN

Do you work hard?

NICKY

Yes.

HELEN

Really hard?

NICKY

Frightfully.

HELEN

Liar!

NICKY

If you’d seen me in Paris--studying, studying--all night long until the gray dawn put the guttering candle to shame--and my nerveless hands dropped from the keys----

HELEN

Candles gutter awfully quickly when they’re burned at both ends.

NICKY

Meaning that I look a debauched wreck of my former self?

HELEN

Exactly.

NICKY

If you go on encouraging me at this rate I shall commit suicide.

HELEN

You do resent anyone taking a real interest in you, don’t you?

NICKY

I distrust it.

HELEN

Why?

NICKY

I don’t know--I’m not worth it.

HELEN

You seem to be suffering from a slight inferiority complex.

NICKY

Not a bit of it--I’m gay and witty and handsome.

HELEN

Oh, Nicky, you’re so maddening.

NICKY

Don’t be cross, Helen.

HELEN

I’m one of the few people who know what you’re really like, and you won’t give me the credit for it.

NICKY

Do you think you do, honestly?

HELEN

Yes--and I’m exceedingly worried about you.

NICKY

You needn’t be.

HELEN

You’re sensitive and reserved and utterly foolish.

NICKY

Thank you--I’m beginning to feel beautifully picturesque.

HELEN

And you’re scared.

NICKY

Why! What have I to be scared about?

HELEN

Would you like me to tell you?

NICKY

No.

HELEN

Why not?

NICKY

Because you’re a sentimentalist, and you see things that aren’t there at all.

HELEN

You’re far more sentimental than I.

NICKY

Darling Helen--you’ve got such a lovely mind--like a Christmas card--with frosted robins and sheep wandering about in the snow--bleating.

HELEN

All the same, I should give up drugs if I were you.

NICKY

Helen!

HELEN

Well?

NICKY

I don’t know what you mean.

HELEN

Do you think I can’t see?

NICKY

[_Forcing a laugh_]

You’re being terribly funny, aren’t you?

HELEN

You fool! You unutterable little fool!

NICKY

Don’t be dramatic, dear.

HELEN

I thought you had common sense; I credited you with more intelligence than that.

NICKY

If you persist in being absurd.

HELEN

[_Suddenly with intense feeling_]

Nicky, don’t resist me, don’t fight me; I’m your friend; I wouldn’t have said a word if I weren’t. You’ve got to stop it; you haven’t gone very far yet; there’s still time. For God’s sake listen to reason.

NICKY

Shut up, shut up, don’t speak so loudly.

HELEN

Nicky, throw it away.

NICKY

When did you find out?

HELEN

To-night, you know, when you were playing, but I’ve guessed for ages.

NICKY

You needn’t be frightened, Helen; I only take just the tiniest little bit, once in a blue moon!

HELEN

If anything goes wrong, you’ll take a lot. Throw it away.

NICKY

What could go wrong?

HELEN

Never mind, throw it away!

NICKY

I can’t. Look out; somebody’s coming.

[_Enter_ DAVID.]

DAVID

Hallo!

NICKY

Hallo, father!

DAVID

What’s the matter?

NICKY

The matter--why?

DAVID

You look very worried.

NICKY

Helen and I have just had a grand heart-to-heart talk; we’ve undone our back hair, loosened our stays and wallowed in it.

DAVID

Oh, I see!

HELEN

We haven’t seen one another for so long--it was inevitable.

DAVID

You never came and looked at the farm this morning. I waited for you.

NICKY

I’m awfully sorry, father--I just went on sleeping.

HELEN

I’ll see you later, Nicky.

NICKY

All right.

[HELEN _goes out_.]

DAVID

How do you think your mother’s looking?

NICKY

Splendid--the same as ever.

DAVID

Would you like a cigar?

NICKY

No, thanks, father--I’m not very good at them.

DAVID

I was just on my way to bed--there are far too many people in the house.

NICKY

[_Smiling_]

You must be used to that by now.

DAVID

You ought to stay down here, you know--during the week, and get some fresh air.

NICKY

I’ve got such millions of things to do in London.

DAVID

Worth doing?

NICKY

Yes, of course.

DAVID

You look as though you needed a rest.

NICKY

You needn’t worry about me--I feel splendid.

DAVID

She seems a nice girl.

NICKY

Who--Bunty?

DAVID

Yes. Quiet and untiresome.

NICKY

She’s a darling!

DAVID

When do you propose to get married?

NICKY

I don’t know. The engagement’s only a sort of try out, you know.

DAVID

Oh, I see. I didn’t realize that. I’m so unversed in modern technicalities.

NICKY

It’s her idea really--just to tread water for a bit.

DAVID

It sounds an excellent plan.

NICKY

I’m awfully glad you like her.

DAVID

Is she musical?

NICKY

Oh, yes--frightfully!

DAVID

Good!

NICKY

Father, I think I will come down here for a few days--and work quietly.

DAVID

If you do that I’ll go up to London every other day. I see so little of you when you’re at the flat.

NICKY

That’s settled then. I wonder what mother will say!

DAVID

I’ll talk to her.

NICKY

All right. She won’t bother about us much.

DAVID

No--I don’t suppose she will. I think I’ll be getting along to bed now. Good night, my boy!

NICKY

Good night, father!

[_They shake hands, and_ DAVID _pats_ NICKY’S _shoulder rather
tentatively. He goes upstairs and_ NICKY _wanders to the piano.
He plays absently, and_ BUNTY _enters_.]

BUNTY

I want to talk to you.

NICKY

[_Still playing_]

All right.

BUNTY

Perhaps you’d stop playing for a minute.

NICKY

Won’t you let me woo you with a little Scriabine?

BUNTY

Please stop.

NICKY

[_Rising_]

I’m unappreciated--that’s what it is.

[_There is a slight pause--he goes over to her._]

I say, Bunty----

BUNTY

What?

NICKY

Before you say anything awful to me, I _am_ sorry for being rude just now.

BUNTY

So you ought to be.

NICKY

Will you forgive me?

BUNTY

Yes, I forgive you.

NICKY

I’ve been irritable all the evening.

BUNTY

Give me a cigarette, Nicky.

NICKY

Here.

[_They both smoke._]

BUNTY

Thanks.

NICKY

What did you want to talk to me about?

BUNTY

Lots of things--us!

NICKY

[_Hardening_]

Oh, I see!

BUNTY

Don’t you think it’s rather silly--being engaged?

NICKY

No, not at all.

BUNTY

I do.

NICKY

Just because we bickered a bit to-night?

BUNTY

No, not only because of that.

NICKY

Why then?

BUNTY

Can’t you see?

NICKY

No.

BUNTY

Well, we’re not very suited to each other, are we?

NICKY

Why do you suddenly say that?

BUNTY

Because I’ve only just realized it.

NICKY

I’m sorry.

BUNTY

It’s not your fault particularly.

NICKY

I’m glad.

BUNTY

It’s circumstances and surroundings.

NICKY

Oh, that can be altered quite easily. We’ll change the shape of the house--we’ll take all that wall away and turn that into a studio--you love studios, don’t you?--then we’ll transform the drawing-room into an enormous aviary.

BUNTY

It’s practically that now!

NICKY

And then we’ll----

BUNTY

Shut up, Nicky!

NICKY

I’m only trying to be amenable.

BUNTY

Are you, really?

NICKY

Yes, I’m putting up a sort of defense, Bunty. I have a feeling that you’re going to be unpleasant, and I want to establish myself comfortably before you start.

BUNTY

I don’t want to be unpleasant--only honest.

NICKY

You won’t let the two run together, will you?

BUNTY

[_With vehemence_]

You’re hopeless, hopeless, hopeless!

NICKY

Yes--I think I am, rather.

BUNTY

In a way I’m glad--it makes it easier.

NICKY

Does it?

BUNTY

You’re not in love with me, really--you couldn’t be!

NICKY

Please don’t say that.

BUNTY

Why don’t you face things properly?

NICKY

One generally has to in the end. I like to put it off for as long as possible.

BUNTY

That’s cowardly.

NICKY

Don’t be pompous, darling.

BUNTY

You’re a great help, I must say.

NICKY

Why should I help to destroy my own happiness?

BUNTY

That’s self-pity and self-deception.

NICKY

Why are you going on like this?

BUNTY

Because I tell you--I’ve realized the truth.

NICKY

I suppose you’ve taken a hatred to mother!

BUNTY

No, not a hatred.

NICKY

You don’t like her.

BUNTY

Not very much.

NICKY

Why not? She likes you.

BUNTY

She detests me.

NICKY

Nonsense! Why should she?

BUNTY

Because I’m young.

NICKY

What a filthy thing to say!

BUNTY

It’s true.

NICKY

It’s nothing of the sort.

BUNTY

You’re so stupid sometimes.

NICKY

Thank you.

BUNTY

Don’t let’s start bickering again.

NICKY

We won’t discuss mother any more then.

BUNTY

You started it.

NICKY

I wish I could make you understand her like I do. I mean she’s awfully irritating, I know--but deep down she’s marvelous in spite of everything.

BUNTY

[_Coldly_]

Everything?

NICKY

[_Vehemently_]

Yes, _everything_! Don’t be a beast, Bunty; just try to see her point a little, even if you do dislike her. She is terribly silly about being “young,” I know, but she’s been used to so much admiration and flattery and everything always, she feels she sort of can’t give it up--you do see that, don’t you? And she hasn’t really anything in the least comforting to fall back upon. She’s not clever--real kind of brain cleverness--and father’s no good, and I’m no good, and all the time she’s wanting life to be as it was instead of as it is. There’s no harm in her anywhere--she’s just young inside. Can’t you imagine the utter foulness of growing old? ’Specially if you’ve been lovely and attractive like she was. The beautiful Flo Lancaster! She used to be known as that. I can remember her when I was quite small, coming up to say good night to me, looking too perfectly radiant for words--and she used to come to the school, too, sometimes, and everyone used to go mad over her, and I used to get frightfully proud and excited----

BUNTY

I’ve never heard you talk like this before.

NICKY

I don’t think I ever have.

BUNTY

I like you better clear cut, not blurred by sentiment.

[NICKY _looks at her for a moment in amazement_.]

NICKY

To describe you as hard would be inadequate--you’re metallic!

BUNTY

I can see straight.

NICKY

[_Politely_]

Can you?

BUNTY

Yes. We could never be happy together.

NICKY

Perhaps not.

BUNTY

Shall we just--finish--then?

NICKY

Certainly, I’m sorry we were too modern to have an engagement ring; you’d have been able to give it back to me so beautifully.

BUNTY

Don’t be ridiculous!

NICKY

Better than being blurred by sentiment.

[BUNTY _lights another cigarette and, kicking off her shoes,
perches on the club fender and proceeds to warm her feet at
the fire_.]

[_Enter_ CLARA HIBBERT.]

CLARA

My dear, I’m _shattered_--and I’m going straight to bed--probably for several weeks.

BUNTY

Why?

CLARA

Shshsh! He’s coming.

BUNTY

Who’s coming?

CLARA

Bruce Fairlight. I’ve been teaching him Mah-Jong. These master brains--agony, dear----

[_Enter_ BRUCE FAIRLIGHT.]

BRUCE

Very interesting, that game.

CLARA

[_Weakly_]

I thought you’d like it.

BRUCE

It’s interesting _psychologically_! The concentration and suspense----

[_Enter_ FLORENCE, HELEN, PAWNIE _and_ TOM. TOM _is grasping a
whisky and soda_--PAWNIE _is eating a biscuit_.]

PAWNIE

I’m quite exhausted; it must be the country air----

FLORENCE

--It was too lovely, because I started with two red dragons in my hand----

HELEN

I wondered who had them----

PAWNIE

One more tune, Nicky, before we go to bed----

FLORENCE

Yes, just one----

NICKY

[_Looking at_ BUNTY]

I’ll play “I love you”--such a romantic tune.

[_He puts on the gramophone._]

BUNTY

Do.

HELEN

What time’s everyone going up in the morning?

FLORENCE

The ten-o’clock’s the best--we’ll have breakfast at nine downstairs.

PAWNIE

[_Confidentially_]

Do you know that in London I can never do more than nibble a piece of thin toast, and whenever I’m away I eat _enormously_!

NICKY

How very peculiar!

PAWNIE

Your tone revolts me, Nicky. You must never be irascible with your old friends.

NICKY

I haven’t got any.

HELEN

Nicky!

NICKY

Sorry, Helen.

FLORENCE

I don’t know what’s the matter with Nicky. He’s been in a vile temper all the evening--his first week-end home, too.

NICKY

Such a pity, when so much trouble has been taken to make me happy and cozy.

TOM

Come and dance, Bunty.

BUNTY

No, not now.

NICKY

Dance with him, Bunty. Chaps must have exercise.

FLORENCE

You dance with Bunty, Pawnie--I’ll dance with Tom--come on.

[_She and_ TOM _dance_.]

HELEN

The great thing in this world is not to be obvious, Nicky--over _anything_!

[FLORENCE _and_ TOM _dance, also_ HELEN _and_ PAWNIE.
_Everyone talks at once, as in the beginning of the act._]

PAWNIE

You are infuriating, Helen. It’s a wonderful book.

HELEN

Thoroughly second-rate.

PAWNIE

What do you think about _Mischievous Passion_, Fairlight?

BRUCE

I never read novels on principle.

PAWNIE

Well, you must read this--it’s colossal.

HELEN

Don’t be led away by Pawnie, Mr. Fairlight, he has no discrimination.

PAWNIE

But I tell you it’s brilliant! Absolutely _brilliant!_

HELEN

Nonsense.

PAWNIE

There are times, Helen, when I could willingly see you dead at my feet.

FLORENCE

A little slower, for Heaven’s sake!

NICKY

How’s that?

[_He makes it far too slow._]

FLORENCE

I think you’d better go to bed, Nicky.

HELEN

We’re all going, anyhow.

NICKY

Not yet, please, mummy dear--I’m having such a lovely time!

[_He slams off in a rage._]

PAWNIE

I always knew the Continent was fatal for the young.

BUNTY

Nicky’s upset--it’s my fault--we’re not engaged any more.

FLORENCE

Why--what’s happened?

BUNTY

Nothing happened--it was never very serious, really.

HELEN

I had a feeling that it was.

BUNTY

You were wrong.

FLORENCE

Well, I must say it’s all been rather abrupt.

BUNTY

It’s better to finish things off at once--cleanly--if you’re not quite sure, don’t you think?

FLORENCE

Well, I’m sorry, Bunty. If you feel like that about it there’s nothing more to be said.

BUNTY

I wouldn’t have mentioned it at all--only you all seemed to be blaming him for being irritable----

HELEN

Poor Nicky!

CLARA

I really must go up to bed now. I’m so tired. Good night, Florence dear.

FLORENCE

Good night, Clara. Breakfast at nine. Have you got books and everything you want?

CLARA

Yes, thanks. Good night, everyone.

[_Everyone murmurs good night politely._]

FLORENCE

Tom, be an angel and fetch me a glass of milk. It’s in the drawing-room.

TOM

All right.

[_He goes off._]

HELEN

Come on up, Florence. I’m dead.

FLORENCE

So am I. Will you turn out the lights when you come?

PAWNIE

With beautiful precision, dear.

FLORENCE

[_As she and_ HELEN _go upstairs_]

Tell Tom to bring my milk up to me, somebody.

PAWNIE

All right.

FLORENCE

Good night, Mr. Fairlight.

BRUCE

Good night.

PAWNIE

Good night, Florence.

[FLORENCE _and_ HELEN _go off_.]

BRUCE

I suppose we’d all better go up.

BUNTY

I don’t feel I could sleep yet.

[_Re-enter_ TOM _with glass of milk_.]

TOM

Hallo! Where’s Florence?

BUNTY

Gone up to bed. Will you take her milk to her?

PAWNIE

What’s become of Nicky?

TOM

In the smoking-room, I think.

BRUCE

Good night, Miss Mainwaring.

BUNTY

Good night.

[_They shake hands._]

PAWNIE

I shall come, too--good night.

TOM

Good night.

PAWNIE

[_To_ BRUCE _as they go upstairs_]

When you’re writing, do your characters grow as you go along?

BRUCE

No, I think each one out minutely beforehand.

PAWNIE

How too intriguing.

[_They go off._]

TOM

So you’ve broken it off already?

BUNTY

Yes.

TOM

I didn’t know you were going to do it so soon.

BUNTY

It’s better to get things over.

TOM

What did he say?

BUNTY

Nothing much.

TOM

Was he furious?

BUNTY

Oh, what does it matter? Don’t let’s go on about it.

TOM

It’s all damned awkward.

BUNTY

What?

TOM

The whole thing.

BUNTY

You’re rather scared, aren’t you?

TOM

No, not exactly--now that I’ve got you to back me up.

BUNTY

I shall be glad when we’re out of this house.

TOM

So shall I.

BUNTY

I hate the atmosphere.

TOM

I don’t know how I’ve stood it for so long.

BUNTY

You didn’t notice it until I came, any more than I noticed Nicky’s atmosphere until you came.

TOM

It’s queer, isn’t it?

BUNTY

We’re reverting to type, don’t you see?

TOM

How d’ye mean?

BUNTY

Never mind, it’s true.

TOM

Do you think I’m being a cad to Florence?

BUNTY

Yes, I do rather.

TOM

But, Bunty! You said this morning----

BUNTY

That I didn’t see how you could help yourself; neither I do. It’s frightfully difficult, but it’s not altogether your fault, any more than it would have been mine if I’d married Nicky. One gets carried away by glamour, and personality, and magnetism--they’re beastly treacherous things.

TOM

You are wonderful.

BUNTY

Don’t be silly.

TOM

You’re so cool and clear, and you see everything.

BUNTY

I’m sorry--for Nicky.

TOM

Oh, damn Nicky!

BUNTY

[_Laughing_]

Oh, Tom!

TOM

Why, what’s up?

BUNTY

You’re so dead set.

TOM

You’re worth ten of him any day. What’s the use of a chap like that? He _doesn’t do_ anything except play the piano--he can’t play any games, he’s always trying to be funny----

BUNTY

Shut up, Tom; you’re being rather cheap. I haven’t reverted to type so quickly that I can’t see some of the things I’m missing.

TOM

I wish I knew what you were talking about.

BUNTY

Oh, God! I feel so miserable!

[_She burst into tears._]

TOM

[_Flummoxed_]

I say--Bunty--for Heaven’s sake----

[_He puts his arm round her._]

BUNTY

[_Shaking him off_]

Don’t, don’t. Give me my shoes----

[_He picks up her shoes; she puts them on. She is half sobbing
all the time._]

TOM

I say, old girl, hadn’t you better go to bed? You’re all wrought up!

BUNTY

He said beastly things.

TOM

I’ll wring his neck.

BUNTY

[_With a fresh burst of tears_]

Shut up, Tom, shut up----

TOM

Bunty, stop crying--there’s a dear; please, please stop crying----

[_He takes her in his arms and kisses her; she is groping for
her handkerchief._ FLORENCE _comes quietly downstairs_.]

BUNTY

I can’t find my hanky!

TOM

Here’s mine.

FLORENCE

[_Like a pistol shot_]

Tom!

[TOM _and_ BUNTY _break away_.]

TOM

Yes, Florence?

FLORENCE

[_Ominously_]

What does this mean?

TOM

I’m sorry, Florence--I----

FLORENCE

You utter cad!

BUNTY

Look here--I should like to say----

FLORENCE

Be quiet--mind your own business.

[NICKY _enters_.]

NICKY

[_Seeing tears on_ BUNTY’S _face_]

What’s the matter--is anybody hurt?

FLORENCE

[_Ominously_]

No, not hurt!

BUNTY

I banged my hand, that’s all.

FLORENCE

Liar!

NICKY

Mother--don’t be so stupid----

TOM

Florence--I----

FLORENCE

Don’t _speak_ to me----

NICKY

[_Quietly_]

Mother--not now--not now--it’s all wrong. Control yourself! Bunty--Bunty--do go to bed--please.

[_He goes to the piano and begins to play jazz._]

BUNTY

All right--Tom----

[FLORENCE _goes to the fireplace, trembling with rage_. NICKY
_goes on playing_. TOM _and_ BUNTY _go towards the stairs_.]

FLORENCE

Stop--I want an explanation, please!

BUNTY

How dare you speak to me like that?

FLORENCE

Get out of my house! Get out of my house!

BUNTY

This is disgusting!

TOM

I say, Florence----

FLORENCE

Get out of my house!

BUNTY

I shall leave the first thing in the morning; it’s much too late to-night.

[_She goes off._]

[NICKY _never stops playing for a moment_.]

FLORENCE

Tom. [_He goes towards her, absolutely silent._] You kissed her--you kissed her--I saw you!----

TOM

Yes.

FLORENCE

In this house!

TOM

Yes, Florence. I apologize.

FLORENCE

Apologize! You’re beneath contempt. Never speak to me again, never touch me again--I hate you!

TOM

Look here, Florence--I’m desperately sorry. You see, I’m afraid I love her.

FLORENCE

[_Hysterically_]

You dare to stand there and say that to me? It’s incredible--after all I’ve done for you--after all we’ve been to each other. Love! You don’t know what it means. You’ve lied to me--all these months. It’s contemptible--humiliating. Get out of my sight!

TOM

[_Turning and going upstairs_]

Very well.

FLORENCE

[_Suddenly realizing that he is gone_]

Tom--Tom--come back--come back!----

[_She runs upstairs after him._ NICKY _at last stops playing
and lets his hands drop from the keys_.]

CURTAIN

ACT III