Chapter I: Front Matter

THE WORKS OF ROBERT G. INGERSOLL

"THE CLERGY KNOW, THAT I KNOW, THAT THEY KNOW, THAT THEY DO NOT KNOW."

IN TWELVE VOLUMES, VOLUME II.

LECTURES

1900

THE DRESDEN EDITION

TO

MRS. SUE. M. FARRELL,

IN LAW MY SISTER,

AND IN FACT MY FRIEND,

THIS VOLUME,

AS A TOKEN OF RESPECT AND LOVE, IS DEDICATED.

CONTENTS OF VOLUME II.

SOME MISTAKES OF MOSES.

(1879.)

Preface--I. He who endeavors to control the Mind by Force is a Tyrant, and he who submits is a Slave--All I Ask--When a Religion is Founded--Freedom for the Orthodox Clergy--Every Minister an Attorney--Submission to the Orthodox and the Dead--Bounden Duty of the Ministry--The Minister Factory at Andover--II. Free Schools--No Sectarian Sciences--Religion and the Schools--Scientific Hypocrites--III. The Politicians and the Churches--IV. Man and Woman the Highest Possible Titles--Belief Dependent on Surroundings--Worship of Ancestors--Blindness Necessary to Keeping the Narrow Path--The Bible the Chain that Binds--A Bible of the Middle Ages and the Awe it Inspired--V. The Pentateuch--Moses Not the Author--Belief out of which Grew Religious Ceremonies--Egypt the Source of the Information of Moses--VI. Monday--Nothing, in the Light of Raw Material--The Story of Creation Begun--The Same Story, substantially, Found in the Records of Babylon, Egypt, and India--Inspiration Unnecessary to the Truth--Usefulness of Miracles to Fit Lies to Facts--Division of Darkness and Light--VII. Tuesday--The Firmament and Some Biblical Notions about it--Laws of Evaporation Unknown to the Inspired Writer--VIII. Wednesday--The Waters Gathered into Seas--Fruit and Nothing to Eat it--Five Epochs in the Organic History of the Earth--Balance between the Total Amounts of Animal and Vegetable Life--Vegetation Prior to the Appearance of the Sun--IX. Thursday--Sun and Moon Manufactured--Magnitude of the Solar Orb--Dimensions of Some of the Planets--Moses' Guess at the Size of Sun and Moon--Joshua's Control of the Heavenly Bodies--A Hypothesis Urged by Ministers--The Theory of "Refraction"--Rev. Henry Morey--Astronomical Knowledge of Chinese Savants--The Motion of the Earth Reversed by Jehovah for the Reassurance of Ahaz--"Errors" Renounced by Button--X. "He made the Stars Also"--Distance of the Nearest Star--XI. Friday--Whales and Other Living Creatures Produced--XII. Saturday--Reproduction Inaugurated--XIII. "Let Us Make Man"--Human Beings Created in the Physical Image and Likeness of God--Inquiry as to the Process Adopted--Development of Living Forms According to Evolution--How Were Adam and Eve Created?--The Rib Story--Age of Man Upon the Earth--A Statue Apparently Made before the World--XIV. Sunday--Sacredness of the Sabbath Destroyed by the Theory of Vast "Periods"--Reflections on the Sabbath--XV. The Necessity for a Good Memory--The Two Accounts of the Creation in Genesis I and II--Order of Creation in the First Account--Order of Creation in the Second Account--Fastidiousness of Adam in the Choice of a Helpmeet--Dr. Adam Clark's Commentary--Dr. Scott's Guess--Dr. Matthew Henry's Admission--The Blonde and Brunette Problem--The Result of Unbelief and the Reward of Faith--"Give Him a Harp"--XVI. The Garden--Location of Eden--The Four Rivers--The Tree of Knowledge--Andover Appealed To--XVII. The Fall--The Serpent--Dr. Adam Clark Gives a Zoological Explanation--Dr. Henry Dissents--Whence This Serpent?--XVIII. Dampness--A Race of Giants--Wickedness of Mankind--An Ark Constructed--A Universal Flood Indicated--Animals Probably Admitted to the Ark--How Did They Get There?--Problem of Food and Service--A Shoreless Sea Covered with Innumerable Dead--Drs. Clark and Henry on the Situation--The Ark Takes Ground--New Difficulties--Noah's Sacrifice--The Rainbow as a Memorandum--Babylonian, Egyptian, and Indian Legends of a Flood--XIX. Bacchus and Babel--Interest Attaching to Noah--Where Did Our First Parents and the Serpent Acquire a Common Language?--Babel and the Confusion of Tongues--XX. Faith in Filth--Immodesty of Biblical Diction--XXI. The Hebrews--God's Promises to Abraham--The Sojourning of Israel in Egypt--Marvelous Increase--Moses and Aaron--XXII. The Plagues--Competitive Miracle Working--Defeat of the Local Magicians--XXIII. The Flight Out of Egypt--Three Million People in a Desert--Destruction of Pharaoh ana His Host--Manna--A Superfluity of Quails--Rev. Alexander Cruden's Commentary--Hornets as Allies of the Israelites--Durability of the Clothing of the Jewish People--An Ointment Monopoly--Consecration of Priests--The Crime of Becoming a Mother--The Ten Commandments--Medical Ideas of Jehovah--Character of the God of the Pentateuch--XXIV. Confess and Avoid--XXV. "Inspired" Slavery--XXVI. "Inspired" Marriage-XXVII. "Inspired" War-XXVIII. "Inspired" Religious Liberty--XXIX. Conclusion.

SOME REASONS WHY.

(1881.)

I--Religion makes Enemies--Hatred in the Name of Universal Benevolence--No Respect for the Rights of Barbarians--Literal Fulfillment of a New Testament Prophecy--II. Duties to God--Can we Assist God?--An Infinite Personality an Infinite Impossibility-Ill. Inspiration--What it Really Is--Indication of Clams--Multitudinous Laughter of the Sea--Horace Greeley and the Mammoth Trees--A Landscape Compared to a Table-cloth--The Supernatural is the Deformed--Inspiration in the Man as well as in the Book--Our Inspired Bible--IV. God's Experiment with the Jews--Miracles of One Religion never astonish the Priests of Another--"I am a Liar Myself"--V. Civilized Countries--Crimes once regarded as Divine Institutions--What the Believer in the Inspiration of the Bible is Compelled to Say--Passages apparently written by the Devil--VI. A Comparison of Books--Advancing a Cannibal from Missionary to Mutton--Contrast between the Utterances of Jehovah and those of Reputable Heathen--Epictetus, Cicero, Zeno, Seneca--the Hindu, Antoninus, Marcus Aurelius--The Avesta--VII. Monotheism--Egyptians before Moses taught there was but One God and Married but One Wife--Persians and Hindoos had a Single Supreme Deity--Rights of Roman Women--Marvels of Art achieved without the Assistance of Heaven--Probable Action of the Jewish Jehovah incarnated as Man--VIII. The New Testament--Doctrine of Eternal Pain brought to Light--Discrepancies--Human Weaknesses cannot be Predicated of Divine Wisdom--Why there are Four Gospels according to Irenaeus--The Atonement--Remission of Sins under the Mosaic Dispensation--Christians say, "Charge it"--God's Forgiveness does not Repair an Injury--Suffering of Innocence for the Guilty--Salvation made Possible by Jehovah's Failure to Civilize the Jews--Necessity of Belief not taught in the Synoptic Gospels--Non-resistance the Offspring of Weakness--IX. Christ's Mission--All the Virtues had been Taught before his Advent--Perfect and Beautiful Thoughts of his Pagan Predecessors--St. Paul Contrasted with Heathen Writers--"The Quality of Mercy"--X. Eternal Pain--An Illustration of Eternal Punishment--Captain Kreuger of the Barque Tiger--XI. Civilizing Influence of the Bible--Its Effects on the Jews--If Christ was God, Did he not, in his Crucifixion, Reap what he had Sown?--Nothing can add to the Misery of a Nation whose King is Jehovah

ORTHODOXY.

(1884.)

Orthodox Religion Dying Out--Religious Deaths and Births--The Religion of Reciprocity--Every Language has a Cemetery--Orthodox Institutions Survive through the Money invested in them--"Let us tell our Real Names"--The Blows that have Shattered the Shield and Shivered the Lance of Superstition--Mohammed's Successful Defence of the Sepulchre of Christ--The Destruction of Art--The Discovery of America--Although he made it himself, the Holy Ghost was Ignorant of the Form of this Earth--Copernicus and Kepler--Special Providence--The Man and the Ship he did not Take--A Thanksgiving Proclamation Contradicted--Charles Darwin--Henry Ward Beecher--The Creeds--The Latest Creed--God as a Governor--The Love of God--The Fall of Man--We are Bound by Representatives without a Chance to Vote against Them--The Atonement--The Doctrine of Depravity a Libel on the Human Race--The Second Birth--A Unitarian Universalist--Inspiration of the Scriptures--God a Victim of his own Tyranny--In the New Testament Trouble Commences at Death--The Reign of Truth and Love--The Old Spaniard who Died without an Enemy--The Wars it Brought--Consolation should be Denied to Murderers--At the Rate at which Heathen are being Converted, how long will it take to Establish Christ's Kingdom on Earth?--The Resurrection--The Judgment Day--Pious Evasions--"We shall not Die, but we shall all be Hanged"--"No Bible, no Civilization" Miracles of the New Testament--Nothing Written by Christ or his Contemporaries--Genealogy of Jesus--More Miracles--A Master of Death--Improbable that he would be Crucified--The Loaves and Fishes--How did it happen that the Miracles Convinced so Few?--The Resurrection--The Ascension--Was the Body Spiritual--Parting from the Disciples--Casting out Devils--Necessity of Belief--God should be consistent in the Matter of forgiving Enemies--Eternal Punishment--Some Good Men who are Damned--Another Objection--Love the only Bow on Life's dark Cloud--"Now is the accepted Time"--Rather than this Doctrine of Eternal Punishment Should be True--I would rather that every Planet should in its Orbit wheel a barren Star--What I Believe--Immortality--It existed long before Moses--Consolation--The Promises are so Far Away, and the Dead are so Near--Death a Wall or a Door--A Fable--Orpheus and Eurydice.

MYTH AND MIRACLE.

(1885.)

I. Happiness the true End and Aim of Life--Spiritual People and their Literature--Shakespeare's Clowns superior to Inspired Writers--Beethoven's Sixth Symphony Preferred to the Five Books of Moses--Venus of Milo more Pleasing than the Presbyterian Creed--II. Religions Naturally Produced--Poets the Myth-makers--The Sleeping Beauty--Orpheus and Eurydice--Red Riding Hood--The Golden Age--Elysian Fields--The Flood Myth--Myths of the Seasons--III. The Sun-god--Jonah, Buddha, Chrisnna, Horus, Zoroaster--December 25th as a Birthday of Gods--Christ a Sun-God--The Cross a Symbol of the Life to Come--When Nature rocked the Cradle of the Infant World--IV. Difference between a Myth and a Miracle--Raising the Dead, Past and Present--Miracles of Jehovah--Miracles of Christ--Everything Told except the Truth--The Mistake of the World--V. Beginning of Investigation--The Stars as Witnesses against Superstition--Martyrdom of Bruno--Geology--Steam and Electricity--Nature forever the Same--Persistence of Force--Cathedral, Mosque, and Joss House have the same Foundation--Science the Providence of Man--VI. To Soften the Heart of God--Martyrs--The God was Silent--Credulity a Vice--Develop the Imagination--"The Skylark" and "The Daisy"--VII. How are we to Civilize the World?--Put Theology out of Religion--Divorce of Church and State--Secular Education--Godless Schools--VIII. The New Jerusalem--Knowledge of the Supernatural possessed by Savages--Beliefs of Primitive Peoples--Science is Modest--Theology Arrogant--Torque-mada and Bruno on the Day of Judgment--IX. Poison of Superstition in the Mother's Milk--Ability of Mistakes to take Care of Themselves--Longevity of Religious Lies--Mother's religion pleaded by the Cannibal--The Religion of Freedom--O Liberty, thou art the God of my Idolatry