Chapter III

This was so honest and well-meant,
The father well-nigh did relent;
He said, “I never saw before
So persevering an orator!”

The lover spoke, perhaps with grace,
For two hours in that empty place!
The servants at the Hall let out
The fact, and it got noised about

At concerts, balls, and conversations,
That Cicero spoke these orations
In that huge Hall, week after week,
With no one there to hear him speak.

What was the consequence? A run,
A rush, to see and hear it done;
“We really _must_ hear Cicero Brick!”
All London cried. The crowd was thick.

They mobbed the men who took the pay;
Hundreds that night were turned away;
And Cicero Brick spoke this oration
To an enormous congregation!

The father of the girl he wooed
Now kept his promise, as he should;
The wedding feast of Cicero Brick
Came off at once near Hampton Wick;
And all the guests gave three cheers for
The persevering Orator.

THE OBSTINATE COW

This, if you please, is the Obstinate Cow,--
It all befell I will tell you how;
And that, if you please, is the Resolute Boy,--
He tugs at her tail, and he shouts, “Ahoy!”

It stands to reason, if you but think,
That the milk of an Obstinate Cow to drink
Must make a fellow grow obstinate--
There they are by the Manor-house gate.

He breakfasted, year after year,
On the milk of the cow that you see here;
Her name is Dapple, his name is Jim;
He pulls the cow, and the cow pulls him.

On the gate of the Manor-house may be read
That trespassers will be prosecuted;
The boy is right, and the cow is wrong,
But the cow, as it happens, is much more strong.

It _does_ look awkward, and, if we attend,
We soon shall see how it all will end:
The Squire had a boy who was weak of bone,
And very much wanting in will of his own.

Admiring the pluck of Resolute Jim,
The Squire comes out, and he says to him,
“How came you so plucky?” and Jim says, “How?
I lived on the milk of this Obstinate Cow!”

“Oh, oh!” said the Squire, exceedingly pleased,
“Your father shall sell me this obstinate beast,
And you shall be cowherd.” So said, so done,--
The boy and his father enjoyed the fun.

The Squire’s little boy, who was weak of bone,
And very much wanting in will of his own,
Was fed on the milk of the Obstinate Cow,
And, oh, what a change! You should see him _now_!

His mind is not worth a threepenny-bit,
’Tis dull as a ditch and as void of wit,
Yet he makes it up, and from day to day,
“_Do_ change your mind!” the people say;
But his will is so strong that the people find
They cannot induce him to change his mind!

LAVENDER LADY

I

Light Lady Lavender
Went to wed a Scavenger,
All the boys and girls in town
Laughed at Lady Lavender.

Light Lady Lavender
Hadn’t any provender,
All the boys and girls in town
Cried for Lady Lavender.

II

Lavender Lady got rich again,
And lived in a palace in Lavender Lane;
Flowers and provender!
Sweet Lady Lavender
Lived in a palace in Lavender Lane!

Lavender Lady is kind and gay,
Lavender House is not a long way;
Puddings and pies,
And turkeys’ thighs,
And peacocks’ tails, too, all over eyes!

Ask for her up, ask for her down,
If ever you go to London Town:
In all the nation
There’s no relation
So kind as she is in London town!