Chapter VII: Appendix: , on the Date of Juvenal's Satires (4)

It is worth while to find out exactly what their occupations and pursuits are through the livelong day. If her husband has gone to sleep with his back toward her, the housekeeper is half killed--the tire-women are stripped to be whipped--the Liburnian slave is accused of having come behind his time, and is forced to pay the penalty of another's sleep; one has rods broken[292] about him, another bleeds from the whips, a third from the cowhide. Some women pay a regular salary to their torturers. While he lashes she is employed in enameling her face. She listens to her friend's chat, or examines the broad gold of an embroidered robe. Still he lashes. She pores over the items in her long diary.[293] Still he lashes. Until at length, when the torturers are exhausted, "Begone!" she thunders out in awful voice, the inquisition being now complete.

The government of her house is no more merciful than the court of a Sicilian tyrant. For if she has made an assignation, and is anxious to be dressed out more becomingly than usual, and is in a hurry, and has been some time already waited for in the gardens, or rather near the chapels of the Isiac[294] procuress; poor Psecas arranges her hair, herself with disheveled locks and naked shoulders and naked breasts. "Why is this curl too high?" Instantly the cowhide avenges the heinous crime of the misplacing of a hair. What has poor Psecas done? What crime is it of the poor girl's if your own nose has displeased you?

Another, on the left hand, draws out and combs her curls and rolls them into a band. The aged matron assists at the council, who, having served her due period[295] at the needle, now presides over weighing out the tasks of wool. Her opinion will be first taken. Then those who are her inferiors in years and skill will vote in order, as though their mistress's good name or life were at stake. So great is the anxiety of getting beauty! Into so many tiers she forms her curls, so many stages high she builds[296] her head; in front you will look upon an Andromache, behind she is a dwarf--you would imagine her another person. Excuse her, pray, if nature has assigned her but a short back, and if, without the aid of high-heeled buskins, she looks shorter than a Pigmy[297] maiden; and must spring lightly up on tip-toe for a kiss. No thought meanwhile about her husband! not a word of her ruinous expenditure! She lives as though she were merely a neighbor[298] of her husband's, and in this respect alone is nearer to him--that she hates her husband's friends and slaves, and makes grievous inroads on his purse.

But see! the chorus of the maddened Bellona and the mother of the gods enters the house! and the huge eunuch (a face to be revered by his obscene inferior) who long ago emasculated himself with a broken shell; to whom his hoarse troop and the plebeian drummers give place, and whose cheek is covered with his Phrygian tiara. With voice grandiloquent he bids her dread the approach of September and the autumn blasts, unless she purifies herself with a hecatomb of eggs, and makes a present to him of her cast-off murrey-colored[299] robes: that whatever unforeseen or mighty peril may be impending over her may pass into the tunics, and at once expiate the whole year. She will break the ice and plunge into the river in the depth of winter, or dip three times in Tiber at early dawn, and bathe her timid head in its very eddies, and thence emerging will crawl on bleeding knees, naked and shivering, over the whole field of the haughty king.[300] If white Io command, she will go to the extremity of Egypt, and bring back water fetched from scorching Meroë, to sprinkle on the temple of Isis, that rears itself hard by the ancient sheepfold.[301] For she believes that the warning is given her by the voice of the goddess herself. And this, forsooth, is a fit soul and mind[302] for the gods to hold converse with by night! He therefore gains the chief and highest honor, who, surrounded by his linen-robed flock,[303] and a bald-headed throng of people uttering lamentations, runs to and fro personating the grinning Anubis. He it is that supplicates for pardon whenever the wife does not refrain from nuptial joys on days to be observed as sacred, and a heavy penalty is incurred from the violation of the snowy sheeting. And the silver serpent was seen to nod his head! His are the tears, and his the studied mumblings, that prevail on Osiris not to withhold pardon for her fault, when bribed by a fat goose and a thin cake. When he has withdrawn, some trembling Jewess, having quitted her basket and hay, begs in her secret ear, the interpretess of the laws of Solyma, the potent priestess of the tree--the trusty go-between from highest heaven![304] And she crosses her hand with money, but sparingly enough: for Jews will sell you any dreams you please for the minutest coin. The soothsayer of Armenia or Commagene,[305] handling the liver of the dove still reeking, engages that her lover shall be devoted, or promises the rich inheritance of some childless rich man; he pries into the breasts of chickens and the entrails of a puppy; sometimes too even of a child--he does acts of which he will himself turn informer![306]

But their confidence in Chaldæans will be greater still: whatever the astrologer tells them, they will believe reported straight from the fountain of Ammon; since at Delphi the oracles are dumb, and darkness as to the future is the punishment of the human race. However, of these he is in the highest repute who has been often banished; by whose friendship and venal[307] tablets it came to pass that a citizen of high rank[308] died, and one dreaded by Otho. Hence arises confidence in his art, if both his hands have clanked with chains, and he has been long an inmate of the camp-prison. No astrologer that has never been condemned will have any reputation for genius; but he that has hardly escaped with his life, and scarcely had good fortune enough to be sent to one of the Cyclades,[309] and at length to be set free from the confined Seriphos, he it is whom your Tanaquil[310] consults about the death of her jaundiced mother, for which she has been long impatient; but first, about yourself! when she may hope to follow to the grave her sister and her uncles; whether her adulterer will survive her, for what greater boon than this have the gods in their power to bestow?

And yet she is ignorant what the ill-omened planet of Saturn forebodes; with what star Venus presents herself in fortunate conjunction; what is the month for ill-luck; what seasons are assigned to profit.

Remember to shun even a casual meeting with her in whose hands you see, like the unctuous amber,[311] their calendars well thumbed; who instead of consulting others is now herself consulted; who when her husband is going to join his camp or revisit his home, will refuse to accompany him if restrained by the calculations of Thrasyllus.[312] When it is her fancy to ride as far as the first mile-stone, the lucky hour is taken from her book; if the corner of her eye itches when she rubs it, she calls for ointment after a due inspection of her horoscope: though she lies sick in bed no hour appears suited to taking food, save that which Petosiris[313] has directed. If she be of moderate means, she will traverse the space on both sides of the pillars of the circus, and draw lots, and present her forehead and her hand to the fortune-teller that asks for the frequent palming. The rich will obtain answers from some soothsayer of Phrygia or India hired for the purpose, from some one skilled in the stars and heavens, or one advanced in years who expiates the public places which the lightning[314] has struck. The destiny of the plebeians is learnt in the circus, and at Tarquin's rampart.[315] She that has no long necklace of gold to display, inquires in front of the obelisks and the dolphin-columns,[316] whether she shall jilt the tapster and marry the old-clothes man.

Yet these, when circumstances so require, are ready to encounter the perils of childbirth, and endure all the irksome toils of nursing. But rarely does a gilded bed contain a woman lying-in: so potent are the arts and drugs of her that can insure barrenness, and for bribes kill men while yet unborn. Yet grieve not at this, poor wretch! and with thine own hand give thy wife the potion, whatever it be: for did she choose to bear her leaping children in her womb, thou wouldst perchance become the sire of an Æthiop; a blackamoor would soon be your sole heir, one whom you would not see of a morning.[317]

I say nothing of supposititious children, and all a husband's joys and fond hopes baffled at the dirty pools;[318] and the Pontifices and Salii selected thence, who are to bear in their counterfeit persons the noble name of Scauri. Fortune, that delights in mischief, takes her stand by night and smiles upon the naked babes. All these she cherishes and fosters in her bosom: then proffers them to the houses of the great, and prepares in secret a rich sport for herself. These she dotes on:[319] on these she forces her favors; and smiling, leads them on to advancement as her own foster-children.

One fellow offers a wife magical incantations. Another sells her love potions from Thessaly, to give her power to disturb her husband's intellects, and punish him with the indignity of the slipper. To these it is owing that you are reduced to dotage: hence comes that dizziness of brain, that strange forgetfulness of things that you have but just now done. Yet even this is endurable, if you do not go raving mad as well, like that uncle of Nero for whom his Cæsonia infused the whole forehead of a foal new dropped. Who will not follow where the empress leads? All things were wrapped in flames and with joints disruptured were tottering to their fall, exactly as if Juno had driven her spouse to madness. Therefore the mushroom[320] of Agrippina had far less of guilt: since that stopped the breath but of a single old man, and bade his trembling head descend to heaven,[321] and his lips that slavered with dribbling saliva. Whereas this potion of Cæsonia[322] calls aloud for fire and sword and tortures, and mangles in one bloody mass both senators and knights. So potent is a mare's offspring! Such mighty ruin can one sorceress work!

Women hate their husbands' spurious issue. No one would object to or forbid that. But now it is thought allowable to kill even their husbands' sons by a former marriage.

Take my warning, ye that are under age and have a large estate, keep watch over your lives! trust not a single dish! The rich meats steam, livid with poison of your mother's mixing. Let some one take a bite before you of whatever she that bore you hands you; let your pedagogue, in terror of his life, be taster of your cups.

All this is our invention! and Satire is borrowing the tragic buskin, forsooth; and transgressing the limits prescribed by those who trod the path before us, we are wildly declaiming in the deep-mouthed tones of Sophocles[323] a strain of awful grandeur, unknown to the Rutulian hills and Latin sky. Would that it were but fable! But Pontia[324] with loud voice exclaims, "I did the deed. I avow it! and prepared for my own children the aconite, which bears palpable evidence against me. Still[325] the act was mine!" "What, cruelest of vipers! didst thou kill two at one meal! Two, didst thou slay?" "Ay, seven, had there haply been seven!"

Then let us believe to be true all that tragedians say of the fierce Colchian or of Progne. I attempt not to gainsay it. Yet they perpetrated atrocities that were monstrous even in their days--but not for the sake of money. Less amazement is excited even by the greatest enormities, whenever rage incites this sex to crime, and with fury burning up their very liver, they are carried away headlong; like rocks torn away from cliffs, from which the mountain-height is reft away, and the side recedes from the impending mass.

I can not endure the woman that makes her calculations, and in cold blood perpetrates a heinous crime. They sit and see Alcestis[326] on the stage encountering death for her husband, and were a similar exchange allowed to them, would gladly purchase a lapdog's life by the sacrifice of their husband's! You will meet any morning with Danaides and Eriphylæ in plenty; not a street but will possess its Clytæmnestra. This is the only difference, that that famed daughter of Tyndarus grasped in both hands a bungling, senseless axe.[327] But now the business is dispatched with the insinuating venom of a toad. But yet with the steel too; if her Atrides has been cautious enough to fortify himself with the Pontic antidotes of the thrice-conquered[328] king.

FOOTNOTES:

[237] _Cynthia_ is Propertius' mistress; the other is Lesbia, the mistress of Catullus. V. Catull., Carm. iii. "Lugete O Veneres," etc.

[238] _Conventum._ Three law terms. Conventum, "the first overture." Pactum, "the contract." Sponsalia, "the betrothing." Hence virgins were said to be speratæ; pactæ; sponsæ.

[239] _Lex Julia_, against adultery, recently revived by Domitian.

[240] _Jubis._ Mullets being a bearded fish. Plin., ix., 17.

[241] _Testudineo._ Cf. xi., 94. The allusion is to the story told by Pliny, vii., 12, of the consuls Lentulus and Metellus, who were observed by all present to be wonderfully like two gladiators then exhibiting before them. Cf. Val. Max., ix., 14.

[242] _Lagi._ Alexandria, the royal city of Ptolemy, son of Lagos, and his successors.

[243] _Imperio Sexûs._ Cf. xv., 138, Naturæ imperio.

[244] _Ulmos._ Elms, to which the vines were to be "wedded," therefore put for the vines themselves. Cf. Virg., Georg., i., 2, "Ulmisque adjungere vites." Cf. Sat. viii., 78, Stratus humi palmes viduas desiderat ulmos. Hence Platanus Cælebs evincet ulmos. Cf. Hor., Epod., i., 9.

[245] _Casa._ There is another fanciful interpretation of this passage. The _casa candida_ is said to mean the "white booths" so erected as to hide the picture of the "Argonautic" expedition, at the time of the Sigillaria, a kind of fair following the Saturnalia, when gems, etc., were exposed for sale. Cf. Suet., Nero, 28.

[246] _Crystallina_ are most probably vessels of _pure white glass_, which from the ignorance of the use of metallic oxydes were very rare among the Romans, though they possessed the art of coloring glass with many varieties of hue.

[247] _Mustacea_ (the Greek σησαμῆ, Arist., Pax., 869), a mixture of meal and anise, moistened with new wine.

[248] Dacicus, i. e., gold coins of Domitian--the first from his Dacian, the second from his German wars. It was customary to present a plate full of these to the bride on the wedding night. Domitian assumed the title of Germanicus A.D. 84, and of Dacicus, A.D. 91.

[249]

"She tells thee where to love and where to hate,
Shuts out the ancient friend, whose beard thy gate
Knew from its downy to its hoary state." Gifford.

[250] Cf. Æsch., Ag., 411, ἰὼ λέχος καὶ στίβοι φιλάνορες.

[251] _Octo._ Eight divorces were allowed by law.

[252]

"They meet in private and prepare the bill,
Draw up the instructions with a lawyer's skill." Gifford.

"And teach the toothless lawyer how to bite." Dryden.

[253] _Celsus._ There were two famous lawyers of this name; A. Cornelius Celsus, the well-known physician in Tiberius' reign, who wrote seven books of Institutes, and P. Juventius Celsus, who lived under Trajan and Hadrian, and wrote Digests and Commentaries.

[254] _Endromis._ Cf. iii., 103. "A thick shaggy coat," to prevent cold after the violent exertions in the arena. _Ceroma._ Cf. iii., 68. The gladiator's ointment, made of oil, wax, and clay. "Nec injecto ceromate brachia tendis." Mart., vii., Ep. xxxii., 9.

[255] _Palus_; a wooden post or figure on which young recruits used to practice their sword exercise, armed with shields and wooden swords double the regulation weight.

[256] _Veræ._ Cf. ad i., 22.

[257] _Manicæ._ If the proper reading is not "_tunicæ_" (as tunicati fuscina Gracchi, ii., 117. Cedamus tunicæ, viii., 207), the manicæ are probably "the sleeves of the tunic." Cf. Liv., ix., 40.

[258] _Diversa._ i. e., as a Retiarius instead of a Mirmillo.

[259] _Duræ._ "Pallade placata lanam mollite puellæ!" The process of softening the wool hardened the hands. Ov., Fast., iii., 817.

[260] _Concha_, a large drinking-cup, shaped like a shell; or, not improbably, some large shell mounted in gold for a cup, like the Nautilus of Middle Ages.

[261] Compare the well-known epigram on Pitt and Henry Dundas:

"I can't see the Speaker, Hal, can you?"
"Not see the Speaker? I see two!"

[262] Cf. Shaksp., Othello, Act iii., sc. iii. "In Venice they do let heaven see the pranks they dare not show their husbands!"

[263] Cf. ix., 117.

[264] _Amicas._ Lubinus explains it, "Quas tanquam dives habeat loco clientarum." In Greece and Italy blonde hair was as much prized as dark hair was among northern nations. Hence Helen, Achilles, Menelaus, Meleager, etc., are all ξανθοὶ. The ladies, therefore, prided themselves as much as the men on the personal beauty of their attendants. Cf. v., 56, "Flos Asiæ ante ipsum," etc. The _nutrix_ is the intriguing confidante who manages the amours. The _flava puella_, the messenger.

"A trim girl with golden hair to slip her billets." Gifford.

[265] _Novissima._ Cf. xi., 42, "Post cuncta novissimus exit annulus."

"She who before had mortgaged her estate,
And pawn'd the last remaining piece of plate." Dryden.

[266] _Pullulet._

"As if the source of this exhausted store
Would reproduce its everlasting ore." Hodgson.

[267] _Crispo_, actively, "Crispante chordas." The pecten was made of ivory. Vid. Virg., Æn., vi., 646, _seq._

"Obloquitur _numeris_ septem discrimina vocum,
Jamque eadem digitis jam _pectine_ pulsat _eburno_."

"Decks it with gems, and plays the lessons o'er,
Her loved Hedymeles has play'd before." Hodgson.

[268] _Lamiarum._ Cf. iv., 154.

[269] _Capitolinum._ This festival was instituted by Domitian (Suet., Domit., 4), and was celebrated every fifth year in honor of Jove.

[270] _Dictata._ The repeating the exact formula of words (carmen) after the officiating priest was a most important part of the sacrifice.

[271] _Otia._

"Is your attention to such suppliants given?
If so, there is not much to do in heaven." Gifford.

[272] _Varicosus._ His legs will swell (like Cicero's and Marius's) from standing so long praying.

"The poor Aruspex that stands there to tell
All woman asks, must find his ankles swell." Badham.

[273] _Paludatis._ Cf. Cic., Sext., 33.

[274] _Seres._ What country these inhabited is uncertain, probably Bocharia. It was the country from which the "Sericæ vestes" or "multitia" (ii., 66) came.

[275] _Instantem._ Cf. Hor., iii., Od. iii., 3, "vultus instantis tyranni." Trajan made an expedition against the Armenians and Parthians A.D. 106; and about the same time there was an earthquake in the neighborhood of Antioch (A.D. 115), when mountains subsided and rivers burst forth. Dio Cass., lxviii., 24. Trajan himself narrowly escaped perishing in it. The consul, M. Verginianus Pedo, was killed. Trajan was passing the winter there, and set out in the spring for Armenia.--_Cometem._ Cf. Suet., Ner., 36, "Stella crinita quæ summis potestatibus exitium portendere vulgo putatur."

[276] _Excipit._

"Hear at the city's gate the recent tale,
Or coin a lie herself when rumors fail." Hodgson.

[277] _Niphates._ Properly a mountain in Armenia, from which Tigris takes its rise, and which, in the earlier part of its course, may have borne the name of Niphates. Lucan, iii., 245, and Sil. Ital., xiii., 765, also speak of it as a river. Gifford thinks it is a sly hit at the lady, who converts a mountain into a river.

[278] _Exorata_ implies that their prayers _were_ heard, otherwise their punishment would have been still more cruel.

[279] _Fastes._

"Ho whips! she cries; and flay that cur accurst,
But flay the rascal there that owns him first!" Gifford.

[280] _Œnophorum._ A vessel of any size. The _Urna_ is a determinate measure, holding 24 sextarii, or about 3 gallons, i. e., half the amphora. Cf. xii., 45, "Urnæ cratera capacem, et dignum sitiente Pholo, vel conjuge Fusci."

[281] _Orexim_; cf. iv., 67, 138. This draught was called the "Trope." Mart., xii., Ep. 83. Cf. Cic. pro Deiotaro, 7, "Vomunt ut edant: edunt ut vomant."

[282] _Marmoribus._ Cf. xi., 173, "Lacedæmonium pytismate lubricat orbem." Hor., ii., Od. xxiv., 26, "Mero tinguet pavimentum superbum."

[283] _Præco._

"Dumfounders e'en the crier, and, most strange!
No other woman can a word exchange." Hodgson.

[284] _Laboranti._ The ancients believed that eclipses of the moon were caused by magic, and that loud noises broke the charm.

"Strike not your brazen kettles! She alone
Can break th' enchantment of the spell-bound moon." Hodgson.

[285] "_Sylvano_ mulieres non licet sacrificare." Vet. Schol. Women sacrificed to Ceres and Juno. Vid. Dennis' Etruria, ii., 65-68. Cf. Hor., ii., Ep. i., 143.--_Quadrans._ Philosophers used to go to the commonest baths, either from modesty or poverty. Seneca calls the bath "Res Quadrantaria." Cf. Hor., i., Sat. iii., 147. Cic. pro Cœl. "Quadrantaria permutatio."

[286] _Torqueat._ Cf. vii., 156, "Quæ venient diversæ forte sagittæ," Quint., vi., 3, "Jaculatio verborum." So Plato uses the term δεινὸς ἀκοντιστής, of a Spartan orator.

[287] _Palæmon._ Cf. vii., 215," Docti Palæmonis." "Insignis Grammaticus." Hieron. "Remmius Palæmon," Vicentinus, owed his first acquaintance with literature to taking his mistress' son to school as his "custos angustæ vernula capsæ" (x., 117). Manumitted afterward, he taught at Rome in the reigns of Tiberius and Claudius, and "principem locum inter grammaticos tenuit." Vid. Suet., Gram. Illust., 23, who says he kept a very profitable school, and gives many curious instances of his vanity and luxuriousness. He was Quintilian's master. Cf. Vet. Schol., and Clinton, Fasti Rom. in anno, A.D. 48.

[288] _Opicæ._ Cf. iii., 207, "Opici mures." Opizein Græci dicunt de iis qui imperitè loquuntur. Vet. Schol.

[289] _Poppæana._ "Cosmetics used or invented by Poppæa Sabina," of whom Tacitus says, "Huic mulieri cuncta alia fuere præter honestum animum," Ann., xiii., 45. She was of surpassing beauty and insatiable ambition: married first to Rufus Crispinus, a knight whom she quitted for Otho. Nero became enamored of her, and sent Otho into Lusitania, where he remained ten years. (Cf. Suet., Otho, 3. Clinton, F. R., a. 58.) Four years after he put away Octavia, banished her to Pandataria, and forced her to make away with herself, and her head was brought to Rome to be gazed upon by Poppæa, whom he had now married, A.D. 62. Cf. Tac., Ann., xiv., 64. Poppæa bore him a child next year, whom he called Augusta, but she died before she was four months old, to his excessive grief. Cf. xv., 23. Three years after, "Poppæa mortem obiit, fortuitâ mariti iracundiâ, à quo gravida ictu calcis adflicta est." Nero, it is remarkable, died on the same day of the month as the unfortunate Octavia.

[290] _Lacte._ The old Schol. says _Poppæa_ was banished, and took with her fifty she-asses to furnish milk for her bath. The story of her exile is very problematical, as Heinrich shows, and is probably only an ordinary hyperbole. Pliny says (xxviii., 12; xi., 41) that asses' milk is supposed to make the face tender, and delicately white, and to prevent wrinkles. "Unde Poppæa uxor Neronis, quocunque ire contigisset secum sexcentas asellas ducebat." ὄνους πεντακοσίας ἀρτιτόκους. Xiph., lxii., 28.

[291] _Facies._

"Can it be call'd a face, so poulticed o'er?
By heavens, an ulcer it resembles more!" Hodgson.

"But tell me yet, this thing thus daub'd and oil'd,
Thus poulticed, plaster'd, baked by turns and boil'd;
Thus with pomatums, ointments, lackered o'er,
Is it a face, Ursidius, or a sore?" Gifford.

[292] _Frangit._ Cf. viii., 247, "Nodosam post hæc frangebat vertice vitem." The climax here is not correctly observed, according to Horace. "Ne scuticâ dignum horribili sectere flagello: Nam, ut ferula cædas meritum majora subire Verbera non vereor." I., Sat. iii., 119. The _scutica_ was probably like the "taurea:" the "cowskin" of the American slave States.

[293] _Diurnum._ "The diary of the household expenses." _Relegit_ marks the deliberate cruelty of the lady.

"Beats while she paints her face, surveys her gown,
Casts up the day's accounts, and still beats on." Dryden.

[294] _Isiacæ._ Cf. ix., 22, "Fanum Isidis.... Notior Aufidio mœchus celebrare solebas."

[295] _Emerita._ From the soldier who has served his time and become "emeritus."

[296] _Ædificat._

"So high she builds her head, she seems to be,
View her in front, a tall Andromache;
But walk all round her, and you'll quickly find
She's not so great a personage behind!" Hodgson.

[297] _Pygmæâ._

"Yet not a pigmy--were she, she'd be right
To wear the buskin and increase her height;
To gain from art what nature's stint denies,
Nor lightly to the kiss on tip-toes rise." Hodgson.

[298] _Vicina._

"And save that daily she insults his friends,
Provokes his servants, and his fortune spends,
As a mere neighbor she might pass through life,
And ne'er be once mistaken for his wife." Badham.

[299] _Xerampelinas._ The Schol. describes this color as "inter coccinum et muricem medius," from ξηρὸς, siccus, ἄμπελος, vitis, "the color of vine leaves in autumn;" the "morte feuille" of French dyers.

[300] _Superbi._ The Campus Martius, as having belonged originally to Tarquinius Superbus.

[301] _Ovile_, more commonly _ovilia_ or _septa_, stood in the Campus Martius, where the elections were held.

[302] _Animam_, "the moral," _mentem_, "the intellectual part" of the soul. Cf. Virg., Æn., vi., 11, "Cui mentem animamque Delius inspirat Vates." When opposed to _animus_, anima is simply "the principle of vitality." "Anima, quâ vivimus; mens qua cogitamus." Lactant. So Sat., xv., 148, "Indulsit communis conditor illis tantum animas nobis animum quoque."

"Doubtless such kindred minds th' immortals seek,
And such the souls with whom by night they speak." Badham.

[303] _Linigero._ Cf. Mart., xii., Ep. xxix., 19, "Linigeri fugiunt calvi sistrataque turba." Isis is said to have been a queen of Egypt, and to have taught her subjects the use of linen, for which reason the inferior priests were all clothed in it. All who were about to celebrate her sacred rites had their heads shaved. Isis married Osiris, who was killed by his brother Typhon, and his body thrown into a well, where Isis and her son Anubis, by the assistance of dogs, found it. Osiris was thenceforth deified under the form of an ox, and called Apis: Anubis, under the form of a dog. (Hence Virg., Æn., viii., 698, "Latrator Anubis.") An ox, therefore, with particular marks (vid. Strab., xvii.; Herod., iii., 28), was kept in great state, which Osiris was supposed to animate; but when it had reached a certain age (non est fas eum certos vitæ excedere annos, Plin., viii., 46), it was drowned in a well (mersum in sacerdotum fonte enecant) with much ceremonious sorrow, and the priests, attended by an immense concourse of people, dispersed themselves over the country, wailing and lamenting, in quest of another with the prescribed marks (quæsituri luctu alium quem substituant; et donec invenerint mærent, derasis etiam capitibus. Plin., ii., 3). When they had found one, their lamentations were exchanged for songs of joy and shouts of εὑρήκαμεν (cf. viii., 29, Exclamare libet populus quod clamat Osiri invento), and the ox was led back to the shrine of his predecessor. These gloomy processions lasted some days; and generally during these (or nine days at least) women abstained from intercourse with their husbands. These rites were introduced at Rome, the chief priest personating Anubis, and wearing a dog's head. Hence _derisor_. Cf. xv., 8, "Oppida tota canem venerantur."

[304]

"Her internuntial office none deny,
Between us peccant mortals and the sky." Badham.

[305] _Commagene_ was reduced to a province A.D. 72.

[306] _Deferat._

"Or bid, at times, the human victim bleed,
And then inform against you for the deed." Hodgson.

[307] _Conducenda._

"By whose hired tablet and concurring spell,
The noble Roman, Otho's terror, fell." Hodgson.

[308] _Magnus civis._ Cf. Suet., Otho, 4, "Spem majorem cepit ex affirmatione Seleuci _Mathematici_, qui cum eum olim superstitem Neroni fore spopondisset, tunc ultro inopinatus advenerat, imperaturum quoque brevi repromittens." Cf. Tac., Hist., i., 22, who says one Ptolemæus promised Otho the same when with him in Spain. Ptolemy helped to fulfill his own predictions, "Nec deerat Ptolemæus, jam et sceleris instinctor, ad quod facillimè ab ejusmodi voto transitur."

[309] _Cyclada._ Cf. i., 73, "Aude aliquid brevibus Gyaris et carcere dignum." x., 170, "Ut Gyaræ clausus scopulis parvaque Seripho."

[310] _Tanaquil._ Cf. Liv., i, 34, "perita cœlestium prodigiorum mulier."

"To him thy Tanaquil applies, in doubt
How long her jaundiced mother may hold out." Gifford.

[311] _Pinguia sucina._ The Roman women used to hold or rub amber in their hands for its scent. Mart., iii., Ep. lxv., 5, "redolent quod sucina trita." xi., Ep. viii., 6, "spirant, succina virgineâ quod regelata manu." Cf. v., Ep. xxxviii., II. (Cf. ix., 50.)

"By whom a greasy almanac is borne,
With often handling, like chafed amber worn." Dryden.

[312] _Thrasyllus_ was the astrologer under whom Tiberius studied the "Chaldean art" at Rhodes (Tac., Ann., vi., 20), and accompanied his patron to Rome. (Cf. Suet., Aug., 98.) Cf. Suet., Tib., 14, 62, and Calig., 19, for a curious prediction belied by Caligula.

[313] _Petosiris_, another famous astrologer and physician. Plin., ii., 23; vii., 49.

[314] _Fulgura._ When a place was struck by lightning, a priest was sent for to purify it, a two-year-old sheep was then sacrificed, and the ground, hence called bidental, fenced in.

[315] _Agger._ The mound to the east of Rome, thrown up by Tarquinius Superbus. Cf. viii., 43, "ventoso conducta sub aggere texit." Hor., i., Sat. viii., 15, "Aggere in aprico spatiari."

[316] _Phalas._ The Circensian games were originally consecrated to Neptunus Equestris, or Consus. Hence the dolphins on the columns in the Circus Maximus. The circus was divided along the middle by the Spina, at each extremity of which stood three pillars (metæ) round which the chariots turned: along this spine were seven movable towers or obelisks, called from their oval form ova, or phalæ; one was taken down at the end of each course. There were four factions in the circus, Blue, Green (xi., 196). White, and Red, xii., 114; to which Domitian added the Golden and the Purple. Suet., Domit., 7. The egg was the badge of the Green faction (which was the general favorite), the dolphin of the Blue or sea party. For the form of these, see the Florentine gem in Milman's Horace, p. 3. Böttiger has a curious theory, that the four colors symbolize the four elements, the green being the earth. The circus was the resort of prostitutes (iii., 65) and itinerant fortune-tellers. (Hence "_fallax_," Hor., i., Sat., vi., 113.) Cf. Suet., Jul., 39, and Claud., 21.

[317] _Mane._ "The first thing seen" in the morning was a most important omen of the good or bad luck of the whole day. This is well turned by Hodgson:

"The sooty embryo, had he sprung to light,
Had heir'd thy will and petrified thy sight;
Each morn with horror hadst thou turn'd away,
Lest the dark omen should o'ercloud the day."

[318] _Spurcos lacus._ Infants were exposed by the Milk-pillar in the Herb-market: the low ground on which this stood, at the base of Aventine, Palatine, and Capitoline, was often flooded and covered with stagnant pools. "Hoc ubi nunc fora sunt udæ tenuere paludes," Ov., Fast., vi., 401. The "Velabri regio" of Tibull., ii., v., 33.

"The beggars' bantlings spawn'd in open air,
And left by some pond-side to perish there;
From hence your Flamens, hence your Salii come,
Your Scauri chiefs and magistrates of Rome." Gifford.

[319] _Mimum._ Cf. iii., 40, "Quoties voluit Fortuna jocari."

[320] _Boletus._ Cf. v., 147. Nero used to call mushrooms "the food of the gods" after this. Cf. Suet., Nero, 33. Tac., Ann., xii., 66, 7. Mart., i., Ep. xxi.

[321]

"That only closed the driveling dotard's eyes,
And sent his godhead downward to the skies." Dryden.

[322] _Cæsonia._ Cf. Suet., Calig., 50, "Creditur potionatus a Cæsonia uxore, amatorio quidem medicamento, sed quod in furorem verterit."

[323] _Grande Sophocleo._

"Are these then fictions? and would satire's rage
Sweep in Iambic pomp the tragic stage
With stately Sophocles, and sing of deeds
Strange to Rutulian skies and Latian meads?" Badham.

[324] _Pontia_, daughter of Titus Pontius, and wife of Drymis, poisoned her two children, and afterward committed suicide. The fact was duly inscribed on her tomb. Cf. Mart., vi., Ep. 75.

[325] _Tamen._ Heinrich proposes to read "tantum."

[326] _Alcestim._

"Alcestis, lo! in love's calm courage flies
To yonder tomb where, else, Admetus dies,
While those that view the scene, a lapdog's breath
Would cheaply purchase by a husband's death." Badham.

[327] _Insulsam._

"But here the difference lies--those bungling wives
With a blunt axe hack'd out their husbands' lives." Gifford.

[328] _Ter victi_, by Sylla, Lucullus, and Pompey. Cf. xiv., 452, "Eme quod Mithridates Composuit si vis aliam decerpere ficum Atque alias tractare rosas."

SATIRE VII.

All our hope and inducement to study[329] rests on Cæsar[330] alone. For he alone casts a favoring eye[331] on the Muses, who in our days are in a forlorn state. When poets, now become famous and men of renown, would fain try and hire a little bath at Gabii, or a public oven at Rome. While others, again, would esteem it neither shocking nor degrading to turn public criers: since Clio herself, if starving, would quit the vales of Aganippe, and emigrate to courts.[332] For if not a single farthing is offered you in the Pierian shades, be content with the name and calling of Machæra:[333] and sooner sell what the auction duly set[334] sells to those that stand around; wine-flagons, trivets, book-cases, chests; the "Alcyone" of Paccius, or the "Thebes" and "Tereus" of Faustus. This is preferable to asserting before the judge that you are a witness of what you never did see.[335] Even though Asiatic,[336] and Cappadocian, and Bithynian knights stoop to this: fellows whom Gallo-Græcia transports hither with chalked feet.[337] Hereafter, however, no one will be compelled to submit to an employment derogatory to his studies, who unites loftiness of expression to tuneful numbers, and has chewed the bay.[338] Set vigorously to work then, young men! The kindness[339] of the emperor is looking all around, and stimulates your exertions, while he is seeking worthy objects of his patronage. If you think that from any other quarter you may look for encouragement in your pursuits, and with that view fill the parchment of your yellow[340] tablet; call with all speed for a fagot, and make a present of all your compositions, Telesinus, to Venus' husband:[341] or lock them up, and let the bookworm[342] bore them through as they lie stowed away. Destroy your pens, poor wretch! Blot out your battles that have lost you your nights' rest, you that write sublime poetry in your narrow garret,[343] that you may come forth worthy of an ivy-crown and meagre image. You have nothing farther to hope for. The stingy patron of our days has learned only to admire and praise the eloquent as boys do Juno's peacock.[344] But your prime of life is ebbing away; that is able to bear the fatigue of the sea, the helmet, or the spade. Then weariness creeps over the spirits: and an old age, that is indeed learned but in rags,[345] curses itself and the Muses that it courted. Now learn the devices of the great man you pay court to, to avoid laying out any money upon you: quitting the temple of the Muses, and Apollo, he composes verses himself, and only yields the palm to Homer himself on the score of his priority by a thousand years. But if inflamed by the charms of fame you recite your poetry, he kindly lends you a dirty mansion, and places at your service one that has been long barred up, whose front gate emulates those of a city in a state of siege. He knows how to place his freedmen in seats at the farther end of the audience, and how to arrange his clients who are to cheer you lustily.[346] None of these great lords will give you as much as would pay for the benches,[347] or the seats that rise one above another on the platform you have to hire; or your orchestra of chairs, which must be returned when your recitation is over. Yet still we ply our tasks, and draw furrows in the profitless dust, and keep turning up the sea-shore with sterile plow. For even if you try to abandon the pursuit, the long habit[348] of indulging in this vain-glorious trifling,[349] holds you fast in its fetters. An inveterate itch of writing, now incurable, clings to many, and grows old in their distempered body. But the poet that is above his fellows, whose vein is not that of the common herd; that is wont to spin out no stale or vulgar subject, and stamps no hackneyed verse from a die that all may use; such an one as I can not embody in words, and can only feel in my soul, is the offspring of a mind free from solicitude, exempt from all that can embitter life, that courts the quiet of the woods, and loves to drink the fountains of the Aonides. Nor can it be that poverty should sing in the Pierian cave, or handle the thyrsus, if forced to sobriety, and lacking that vile pelf the body needs both day and night. Well plied with food and wine is Horace when _he_ shouts out his Evoe![350] What scope is there for fancy, save when our breasts are harassed by no thoughts but verse alone; and are hurried along[351] under the influence of the lords of Cirrha and Nysa, admitting of no divided[352] solicitude. It is the privilege of an exalted soul, and not of one bewildered how to get enough to buy a blanket, to gaze on chariots and horses and the forms of divinities, and in what dread shapes Erinnys[353] appalls the Rutulian. For had Virgil lacked a slave and comfortable lodging, all the serpents would have vanished from Alecto's hair: his trumpet, starved to silence, would have blazed no note of terror. Is it fair to expect that Rubrenus Lappa should not fall short of the buskin of the ancients, while his Atreus[354] forces him to pawn his very sauceboats and his cloak?

Poor Numitor is so unfortunate as to have nothing he can afford to send his protégé! Yet he can find something to give Quintilla--he managed to pay for a tame lion, that must have pounds of flesh to feed him. No doubt the huge beast is kept at far less expense; and a poet's stomach is far more capacious! Let Lucan recline at his ease in his gardens among his marble statues, satisfied with fame alone. But to poor Serranus, and starving Saleius, of what avail will glory be, however great, if it be glory only? All flock in crowds to hear his sweet voice, and the tuneful strains of the Thebais, when Statius[355] has gladdened the city, and fixed the day for reciting it. So great is the charm with which he captivates their souls; such the eager delight with which he is listened to by the multitude. But when the very benches are broken down by the ecstasies with which his verses are applauded, he may starve, unless he sells[356] his unpublished "Agave"[357] to Paris. It is he that bestows on many the honors due to military service, and encircles the fingers of poets with the ring that marks their six months' command.[358] What nobles will not give, a player will! And dost thou, then, still pay court to the Camerini and Bareæ, and the spacious halls of nobles? It is "Pelopea" that makes prefects, "Philomela" tribunes. Yet envy not the bard whom the stage maintains. Who is your Mæcenas now, or Proculeius, or Fabius? Who will act Cotta's part again, or be a second Lentulus? In those days talent had its meet reward: then it was profitable to many to become pale, and abstain from wine[359] the whole of December.

Your toil, forsooth, ye writers of histories! is more profitable, it requires more time and more oil. For regardless of all limit, it rises to the thousandth page; and grows in bulk, expensive from the mass of paper used. This the vast press of matter requires, and the laws of composition. Yet what is the crop that springs from it? what the profit from the soil upturned? Who will give an historian as much as he would a notary?[360] "But they are an idle race, that delight in sofas and the cool shade." Well, tell me then, what do the services rendered their fellow-citizens, and their briefs they carry about with them in a big bundle, bring in to the lawyers? Even of themselves they talk grandly enough, but especially when their creditor is one of their hearers; or if one still more pressing nudges their side, that comes with his great account-book to sue for a doubtful debt. Then the hollow bellows of their lungs breathe forth amazing lies; they foam at the mouth till their breast is covered. But if you like to calculate the actual harvest they reap, set in one scale the estate of a hundred lawyers, and you may balance it on the other side with the single fortune of Lacerna, the charioteer of the Red.[361]

The chiefs have taken their seats![362] You, like Ajax, rise with pallid cheek, and plead in behalf of liberty that has been called in question, before a neat-herd[363] for a juryman! Burst your strained lungs, poor wretch! that, when exhausted, the green palm-branches[364] may be affixed to crown your staircase with honor! Yet what is the reward of your eloquence? A rusty ham, or a dish of sprats; or some shriveled onions, the monthly provender of the Africans;[365] or wine brought down the Tiber. Five bottles[366] for pleading four times! If you have been lucky enough to get a single gold piece,[367] even from that you must deduct the stipulated shares of the attorneys.[368] Æmilius will get as much as the law allows;[369] although we pleaded better than he. For he has in his court-yard a chariot of bronze with four tall horses[370] yoked to it; and he himself, seated on his fierce charger, brandishes aloft his bending spear, and meditates battles with his one eye closed. So it is that Pedo gets involved, Matho fails. This is the end of Tongillus, who usually bathes with a huge rhinoceros' horn of oil, and annoys the baths with his draggled train; and weighs heavily in his ponderous sedan on his sturdy Median slaves, as he presses through the forum to bid for[371] slaves, and plate, and myrrhine vases, and villas. For it is his foreign[372] purple with its Tyrian tissue that gets him credit. And yet this answers their purpose. It is the purple robe that gets the lawyer custom--his violet cloaks that attract clients. It suits their interest to live with all the bustle and outward show of an income greater then they really have. But prodigal Rome observes no bounds to her extravagance. If the old orators were to come to life again, no one now would give even Cicero himself two hundred sesterces, unless a huge ring sparkled on his finger. This is the first point he that goes to law looks to--whether you have eight slaves, ten attendants, a sedan to follow you, and friends in toga to go before. Paulus, consequently, used to plead in a sardonyx, hired for the occasion: and hence it was that Cossus' fees were higher than those of Basilus. Eloquence is a rare quality in a threadbare coat!

When is Basilus allowed to produce in court a weeping mother? Who could endure Basilus, however well he were to plead? Let Gaul become your home, or better still that foster-nurse of pleaders, Africa, if you are determined to let your tongue for hire.

Do you teach declamation? Oh what a heart of steel must Vectius have, when his numerous class kills cruel tyrants! For all that the boy has just conned over at his seat, he will then stand up and spout--the same stale theme in the same sing-song. It is the reproduction of the cabbage[373] that wears out the master's life. What is the plea to be urged: what the character of the cause; where the main point of the case hinges; what shafts may issue from the opposing party;--this all are anxious to know; but not one is anxious to pay! "_Pay_ do you ask for? why, what do I know?" The blame, forsooth, is laid at the teacher's door, because there is not a spark of energy in the breast of this scion of Arcadia,[374] who dins his awful Hannibal into my ears regularly every sixth day. Whatever the theme be that is to be the subject of his deliberation; whether he shall march at once from Cannæ on Rome; or whether, rendered circumspect after the storms and thunderbolts, he shall lead his cohorts, drenched with the tempest, by a circuitous route. Bargain[375] for any sum you please, and I will at once place it in your hands, on condition that his father should hear him his lesson as often as I have to do it! But six or more sophists are all giving tongue at once; and, debating in good earnest, have abandoned all fictitious declamations about the ravisher. No more is heard of the poison infused, or the vile ungrateful husband,[376] or the drugs that can restore the aged blind to youth. He therefore that quits the shadowy conflicts of rhetoric for the arena of real debate, will superannuate himself, if my advice has any weight with him, and enter on a different path of life; that he may not lose even the paltry sum that will purchase the miserable ticket[377] for corn. Since this is the most splendid reward you can expect. Just inquire what Chrysogonus receives, or Pollio, for teaching the sons of these fine gentlemen, and going into all the details[378] of Theodorus' treatise.

The baths will cost six hundred sestertia, and the colonnade still more, in which the great man rides whenever it rains. Is he to wait, forsooth, for fair weather? or bespatter his horses with fresh mud? Nay, far better here! for here the mule's hoof shines unsullied.[379] On the other side must rise a spacious dining-room, supported on stately columns of Numidian marble, and catch the cool[380] sun. However much the house may have cost, he will have besides an artiste who can arrange his table scientifically; another, who can season made-dishes. Yet amid all this lavish expenditure, two poor sestertia will be deemed an ample remuneration for Quintilian. Nothing will cost a father less than his son's education.

"Then where did Quintilian get the money to pay for so many estates?" Pass by the instances of good fortune that are but rare indeed. It is good _luck_ that makes a man handsome and active; good luck that makes him wise, and noble, and well-bred, and attaches the crescent[381] of the senator to his black shoe. Good luck too that makes him the best of orators and debaters, and, though he has a vile cold, sing well! For it makes all the difference what planets welcome you when you first begin to utter your infant cry, and are still red from your mother. If fortune so wills it, you will become consul instead of rhetorician; or, if she will, instead of rhetorician, consul! What was Ventidius[382] or Tullius aught else than a lucky planet, and the strange potency of hidden fate? Fate, that gives kingdoms to slaves, and triumphs to captives. Yes! Quintilian was indeed lucky, but he is a greater rarity even than a white crow. But many a man has repented of this fruitless and barren employment, as the sad end of Thrasymachus[383] proves, and that of Secundus Carrinas.[384] And you, too, Athens, were witness to the poverty of him on whom you had the heart to bestow nothing save the hemlock that chilled[385] his life-blood!

Light be the earth, ye gods![386] and void of weight, that presses on our grandsires' shades, and round their urn bloom fragrant crocus and eternal spring, who maintained that a tutor should hold the place and honor of a revered parent. Achilles sang on his paternal hills, in terror of the lash, though now grown up; and yet in whom even then would not the tail of his master, the harper, provoke a smile? But now Rufus[387] and others are beaten each by their own pupils; Rufus! who so often called Cicero "the Allobrogian!" Who casts into Enceladus'[388] lap, or that of the learned Palæmon,[389] as much as their grammarian labors have merited! And yet even from the wretched sum, however small (and it is smaller than the rhetorician's pay), Acænonoëtus, his pupil's pedagogue, first takes his slice; and then the steward who pays you deducts his fragment. Dispute it not, Palæmon! and suffer some abatement to be made, just as the peddler does that deals in winter rugs and snow-white sheetings.[390] Only let not all be lost,[391] for which you have sat from the midnight hour, when no smith would sit, nor even he that teaches how to draw out wool with the oblique iron. Lose not your whole reward for having smelled as many lamps as there were boys standing round you; while Horace was altogether discolored, and the foul smut clave to the well-thumbed Maro. Yet rare too is the pay that does not require enforcing by the Tribune's court.[392]

But do you, parents, impose severe exactions on him that is to teach your boys; that he be perfect in the rules of grammar for each word--read all histories[393]--know all authors as well as his own finger-ends; that if questioned at hazard, while on his way to the Thermæ or the baths of Phœbus, he should be able to tell the name of Anchises' nurse,[394] and the name and native land of the step-mother of Anchemolus--tell off-hand how many years Acestes lived--how many flagons of wine the Sicilian king gave to the Phrygians. Require of him that he mould their youthful morals as one models a face in wax. Require of him that he be the reverend father of the company, and check every approach to immorality.

It is no light task to keep watch over so many boyish hands, so many little twinkling eyes. "This," says the father, "be the object of your care!"--and when the year comes round again, Receive for your pay as much gold[395] as the people demand for the victorious Charioteer!

FOOTNOTES:

[329] _Ratio studiorum._ Cf. Tac., Ann., xi., 7, "Sublatis studiorum pretiis etiam studia peritura."

[330] _Cæsare._ Which Cæsar is intended is a matter of discussion among the commentators; whether Nero, Titus, Trajan, Hadrian, Nerva, or Domitian. Probably the last is meant: as in the beginning of his reign he affected the character of a patron of literature.

[331] _Respexit._ "To view with favor or pity," as a deity: so Virg., Ecl., i., 28, "Libertas, quæ sera tamen respexit inertem."

[332] _Atria._ Either "the antechambers of rich patrons," or to "the Licinian and other courts," near the forum, where auctions were held; the _atria auctionaria_ of Cicero: cf. pro Quint., 12, 25, i. in Rull., 7.

[333] _Machæra_, a famous _Præco_ of his time. Lubin.

[334] _Commissa._ Either from the goods being "intrusted" to the auctioneer by the owner or the magistrate; or from the parties that bid being as it were "pitted," _commissi_, against each other, like gladiators.

[335] _Vidi._ So xvi., 29, "Audeat ille Nescio quis, pugnos qui vidit, dicere vidi."

[336] _Asiani._ "Jam equites, olim servi Asiatici." Lub. The next line is in all probability interpolated, being only a gloss. Heinrich.

[337] _Nudo talo._ Vid. ad i., 111. Or, it may be "barefooted" simply. Galatia in Asia Minor, so called from the colony of Gauls who settled there, A.D. 278, at the invitation of Nicomedes. Liv., xxxviii., 16. Cf. Paus., Phoc., xxiii. Cramer's Asia Minor, ii., 79. Clinton, Fast. Hell. in an.

"Sent from Bithynia's realms with shoeless feet." Badham.

[338] _Laurumque momordit._ So δαφνηφάγοι. The chewing of the bay, as being sacred to Apollo, was supposed to convey divine inspiration. Grang. Cf. Lycoph., 6.

[339]

_Indulgentia._ "Lo! the imperial eye
Looks round attentive on each rising bard,
For worth to praise, for genius to reward." Gifford.

[340] _Croceæ._ Because parchment is always yellow on the side where the hair grew. Others think the parchment itself was dyed yellow. Cf. Pers., iii., 10.

[341] _Veneris marito_, a burlesque phrase for "the fire."

[342] _Tinea._ Cf. Hor., Ep., I., xx., 12, "Tineas pasces taciturnus inertes."

[343] _Cellâ._ So Ben Jonson:

"I that spend half my nights and half my days
Here in a cell, to get a dark pale face,
To come forth worth the ivy or the bays,
And in this age can hope no other grace."

[344] _Junonis avem._

"To praise and _only_ praise the high-wrought strain.
As boys the bird of Juno's glittering train." Gifford.

[345] _Facunda et unda._