Chapter VII: Part 7

These Rules will doubtless be an Infringement on those Liberties Parents usually take in indulging their Children’s Stomachs; and it will be a greater in the Restraint it lays on their growing Passions: but they must convince them of the Purity of their Intentions by speaking to their Understandings; not all at once, but by Degrees, as they open and gain Strength; so that Step by Step they may point out to them the Loveliness, the Pleasure, and the Advantages of this uncommon Virtue. I say nothing here of the State of Childhood, because it is already understood that Parents have their Children’s Health regulated by proper Management, and their Minds docile thro’ the Force of Obedience; but when Dress, Pleasure, Company, Feasting, or whatever subjects us to be intemperate, come into Play, as they are Actions which always cause a Struggle, more or less, between Passion and Reason, it demands the greatest Care and Attention of Parents to win them to a Love of Temperance.

An easy Submission to our Lot in Life is one of the greatest Attainments towards Happiness. View a young Lady with a strong Passion for Dress; every new thing strikes her; one Companion has a richer Silk than herself; another has the sweetest Lace she ever saw; a third has Ear-rings ten times handsomer than her own; she burns with Impatience to equal them, and that granted, new things arise, and the others are old tho’ not worn out; that is, her Relish for them is lost. Thus a continual round of Fashions keep her incessantly anxious; and tho’ perhaps she possesses every thing, she enjoys nothing. Not so the calmer well-instructed Fair; she considers that Propriety of Dress is what suits her Station; and covets not another’s Jewels: she wears, without a Blush, a meaner Silk than her meaner Companion; and free from the Extremes of Negligence or Pride, she is qualify’d for all the Dignity that Dress can give her; but is equally happy in an inferior Appearance. Thus too it happens with our Sons: One is in the continual Pursuit of Pleasure, has a thousand Contrivances to reach a Play, a Ball, or a Horse-race; and is miserable if these things are going on without him: while another, awaken’d by Reason, and check’d by Temperance, takes these things as they come; and neither insipidly refuses the Chearfulness of an Entertainment, nor is disturb’d of his Rest, or loses either his Temper or his Appetite, if he is disappointed. Such is the Difference between Passion and Reason, such the genuine Effects of Temperance.

Temperance, as I observ’d before, is closely connected with Justice; that is, whatever thro’ Intemperance affects our Health, or endangers our Lives, must be unjust. What can be more amazing than the false Judgment of Mankind even in the most obvious things! All allow that we have no Right voluntarily to throw away that Life which Providence has given us; on the contrary, we are bound to support it, even under the Pressure of Pain and Sorrow, to the last Moment. How comes it then that while this is acknowledged, while Men justly shrink with Horror at the very Thought of Self-murder, they have the Hardiness to dally with some murderous Instrument? All the Arguments that are brought against Suicide, whether by Sword, Pistol, Laudanum, or Arsenic, hold good, in some Degree, in the Point before us. The oftener a Building is shock’d, the sooner will it decay; the more Violence is us’d to a delicate Machine, the sooner will it be destroy’d; and no Machine is so exquisitely delicate as Man. Now as every Species of Excess, Riot, and Debauchery, is a Shock given to our Frame, it must naturally impair our Health, and consequently shorten our Lives. Many things tend to effect this, that Men in general are Strangers to; but there are others they are too sensible of, yet attempt not to remove, nay plunge themselves into. Here then appears the Necessity of Temperance; here we see the great Obligation of Parents to their Children in this Point: since they are not only accountable for their Happiness, but even for their Health and Lives. To conclude, let Parents in inculcating this Virtue dissuade their Children from every irregular Attachment, and convince them that no intemperate Affections are justifiable; that besides avoiding those irregular Passions which may be said to reside in the Soul, there are others that dwell on the Senses, equally capable of destroying us; particularly an unhappy Attachment to sleeping, eating, drinking, and many other things in their Nature not only innocent but indispensably necessary; yet, by the frequent grievous Abuse of them, made the Instruments of our Destruction.

These are the things I had to offer on the Part of Manners; these are the Steps I have already in great measure taken with my own Children, and these the Sentiments I wish to inspire them with. If therefore, as general Laws, they are equally applicable to others, my presenting them in Print will, I hope, be consider’d with the same Candour they are offered. But notwithstanding what has already been said, Parents have still much to do. To keep up the Spirit of Government, they must constantly remember that Nature and Reason are to be their Guides: if we distort Nature, our Children will be preposterous Figures; and if we banish Reason, they will be Brutes or Monsters. Parents must remember too, that it is not for themselves that they labour to train up their Children in Order, Obedience, and Knowledge; there must be no self-pointed Views, no Pride, no Dispositions to tyrannise over their own Flesh and Blood; these are Motives unworthy a Place in any Parent’s Breast. Their principal Aim must be to make their Children happy, by making them wise and good; and if they succeed herein, so much Happiness will be reflected back on themselves as will amply reward all their Labours. But they must not stop even here; tho’ this Design is noble, they should have a nobler yet in view; that is, the universal Good of Mankind: ’tis too narrow a Good that seeks itself alone; Children must therefore be animated by their Parents with all those Virtues that will make them dear and valuable to Society. Now what Chance is there that Children will come on the Stage of Life with the necessary Requisites, unless due Pains are taken to mould and temper their Hearts, to form their Minds, and cultivate their Understandings? Mr. _Pope_, after labouring to prove for what End we are in being, what Good we are to pursue, and what Evil avoid, concludes, “that all our Knowledge is ourselves to know.” If then this Self-knowledge is of such vast Importance for the securing our Happiness even in a moral Sense, and is so very difficult to be attained; surely Parents are under the highest Obligation to their Children of improving every Means within their Reach, for the gaining this only true Philosopher’s Stone. The End, as Philosophers agree, is the first thing in the Intention; but the Means to attain that End are surely, in the Case before us, either but little known, or little practised; else we should not see such daily and grievous Mistakes committed in the training up our little Offspring; nor such a continued Chain of Vice, Folly, and Ignorance, as is the general Result of this mistaken Manners, this want of Self-knowledge.

But here I must caution my Readers not to bewilder themselves in a Maze of fancied Difficulties; not to throw aside these Instructions as useful or practicable to none but those of Genius, Learning, and great Abilities: the Light of Nature and Reason beams strongly on us all; and Parents, as I have before observed, have it greatly in their Power to regulate their Children’s Conduct: for after all, it must be confessed, that it is not so much that Parents do not know, as that they want the Will, to act rightly. But I hope, that such as are really ignorant, will here, in some measure, be informed; such as already know, will here be induced to practise: since by avoiding the Errors too generally run into, so much solid Good will ensue. But, to return back again: where or how are we to begin? Why—(as has already been advanc’d) by Authority. Authority is undoubtedly the first Means towards attaining this great End; the other Means are, a steady Attention to the various Tempers of our Children; a strict Guard over our own Conduct; a watchful Eye on theirs; joined to a serious Practice of every Lesson for their Improvement: to which we are to add, such an Education as is suitable to our Sphere in Life.

EDUCATION.

Education is a very extensive Subject; it is a vast Field to expatiate in; and has employed the Thoughts and Pens of many great Men, with whom I pretend not to vie: I confess myself far unequal to the Task; and perhaps the greatest Service I can do my Readers, is to inform them, that, besides the ancient Writers, the Archbishop of _Cambray_, _Tanaquil Faber_, Mr. _Locke_, Monsieur _Crousaz_, and Monsieur _Rollin_, with some others still later, have handled this important Subject. To these then I refer them, as great and useful Guides; but not to these alone; they must go farther; and apply to those, whose Province it is to reduce the Theory of these to Practice: such are many of our living Guides; who tho’ they have not perhaps distinguished themselves by their Writings, are notwithstanding deservedly eminent for their Skill in teaching.

Nor is Education what I principally engaged in, in this Treatise; Manners alone, I have declared to be my Design; and if I can do the present or future Age any real Service by the Plan of puerile Government already laid down, I shall be happy in considering myself as a useful Member of Society. Still it will appear that Education and Manners have so great a Connection, that they are not always to be separated: many of the Writers on these Subjects have considered them as one and the same thing; many just Sentiments are imbibed at the same time that we are acquiring Languages, and other Parts of Learning: and notwithstanding a Truth which was advanced at our first setting out, that much Manners might be acquired without School-learning, yet it is not to be doubted that they ought to rise in proportion to the Education bestowed on us. Two things therefore I aim at in pursuing this Subject, without attempting to teach, or invading the Province of the Preceptor; the one, to point out what seems necessary for both Boys and Girls, in different Spheres of Life, to learn or avoid; the other, to shew how far the Education bestowed on them is applicable to the Improvement of their Manners; or to their Engagement in any Art, Profession, or Science.

As entering on the Subject of Education will naturally carry the Ideas of Parents back to the Childhood of their Offspring, I will, in Conformity with that, suppose, that the Rules already laid down chiefly regard the first Stage of Life; at most, that they are the Ground-work of a future Superstructure: this granted, I will suppose too, that Parents have employed these first seven Years in moulding their Children, and rendering them so far pliable, as readily to submit to whatever their Parents think proper for them to engage in. There is a strong Passion in many Parents to have their Children forward and early in their Learning; where there is really a Genius, a very great Propensity and Aptness to learn, this may certainly not only be allowed, but improved; yet in general I think very little Account is to be made of what they can learn before seven Years old: it is commonly Rote-work, and often forgot almost as soon as learned. However, let these things be taken as they are found: if a Child has a great Quickness and Facility in learning, let it by no Means be check’d; on the other hand, let not another be severely chastised, or it’s Life rendered miserable, who has not the same early Aptness. Those who would avoid Error on this Point must consider, that a Child’s Memory and Judgment are yet too weak to be much exercised; that close Application and intense Labour are very unfit for this Infant Age; that it is putting their tender Minds too much upon the Stretch; and endangers either a fix’d Aversion to learn, or an incurable Dulness: let them farther consider, that such a quick Child as I have been speaking of, learns without the least Difficulty; and if they oblige one of another Cast to learn as much in the same time, it is odds but they give him more Pain than his Frame can bear. Parents then must be very careful to avoid these first Mistakes in the educating their Children; since from a natural Fondness to have them appear to Advantage, they often thrust them on things that are unsuitable to their Age, and such as they are by no Means qualified to undertake.

It must not here be understood, that nothing is to be attempted in the first Stage of Life; that would be the opposite Extreme of Error; and playful as Children usually are at that Age, the leaving them wholly to themselves for seven Years would be not only injuring their Capacities, but might endanger a Habit of Idleness: what I mean is, that all which relates to Education should now be made as light, as easy, and as pleasant as possible; that, as I have observed before, Parents should take things as they are, and not be dissatisfied or disappointed, if they find no extraordinary Progress made.

But this first Stage being over, the Business becomes serious; they are now to enter the Schools. Parents of almost every Rank aim, or seem to aim, at giving their Children Learning; ’tis a natural Ambition, and, if rationally used, highly laudable. Those of an inferior Class say, with a significant Shake of the Head, ’Tis a fine thing to be a Scholar! True, it is so: but surely it is a sad thing to be a learned Beggar; and worse yet to be a learned Blockhead: an unlearned Cobler is a Prince to either of these. To judge of the Propriety of Education, we should, I think, argue from a Knowledge of Life; for as no one surely will say that the same Degree of it is equally proper for all, it follows of course that it will be right or wrong, in proportion to our Knowledge or Ignorance of Mankind, and of those Stations wherein it is so variously exercised. Now in viewing it in this judicious Light, it appears to me, that the Steps frequently taken by Parents in the educating their Children, are in many respects erroneous. Nor is this by any means to be ascribed to the Teachers, but to the Parents; not to the Plan, but to the Execution: for as in the Order of Nature, every thing has it’s own Sphere, it’s Province assign’d it, which cannot be departed from without Error; so in the various Degrees of Mankind, if a proper Regard be not had to Situation and Abilities, the Mistakes committed in educating our Children must be very many.

At the same time that I venture to think our Notions of Education sometimes erroneous, I confess it is extremely difficult to fix precise Rules for a better; no wonder therefore if I err in the Attempt; and in that Case, I hope, the Goodness of my Intention will plead my Excuse. But here let me ask a natural Question; What is it all Mankind aim at in the Education of their Children? certainly to give them such a Degree of Knowledge as will qualify them to fill some certain Post, some certain Station in Life: in short, to fit them for an Employment suited to their Condition, such as will make them happy in themselves, and useful to Society. This, I say, is, or ought to be our Aim: but how grievously do we pervert it? Parents often mistakenly soar above their Reach; like Adventurers in a Lottery, all gape for the highest Prizes; all ambitiously strive to make their Children something more than common, something above themselves; and by these Means often, very often, overturn and utterly ruin them.

The principal Aim of Parents should be, to know what Sphere of Life their Children will act in; what Education is really suitable for them; what will be the Consequence of neglecting that; and what Chance a superior Education will give them for their Advancement to Posts of Dignity. I grant, it is Pity that a fine Genius should be uncultivated and buried in Oblivion; but surely it is greater Pity that Parents should so generally mistake their Children’s Station, Genius, Capacity, and Inclinations, as they generally do; nay more, mistake their own Capacity too; by engaging them in things above their Ability to conduct them through. The first thing many Parents do, is, blindly to magnify their Children’s Parts; in consequence whereof they engage them in such Studies as square with their Fancy; they then turn their Eyes on some few great Men, whose uncommon Merit, Genius, or Good-fortune, have rais’d them to conspicuous Stations; and thus, in the Vanity of their Hearts, conclude their Sons are to be Judges, Bishops, Generals, and I know not what. But I would here earnestly dissuade Parents from this capital Mistake; indeed it seems so glaringly absurd, that I am surprized it should be so common. But those in inferior Stations will say, May we not then give our Children Education? yes certainly: but it should be a suitable one. What then, may we not aspire to raise our Children in the World? or must they, from Generation to Generation, remain Mechanics, Tradesmen, or the like? Let me not be misunderstood. Every one should look forward; there is a necessary Degree of Spirit becoming all Mankind; but then to be judicious, it must be rational: thus, at the same time that we avoid sinking into Meanness, we must be very careful not to tower so high as to endanger our dashing down into Error.

Education, tho’ design’d to lead us to every Advantage, is often bestowed to our Disadvantage, by being the Cause of many Errors, we should otherwise have escaped. Education is often wasted on us, either by being improper for our Station, or by engaging us in things we are unfit for. Education is a Term that often misleads Parents themselves; for many do not know either it’s Extent or Use, nor know if their Children possess it or not. These things considered, it is easy to conclude how common an erroneous Education must be; and how much it behoves Parents to reflect on the necessary Means to obviate the like Errors for the future.

I remember a Lady whose Coachman was an Instance of the Mistakes I have been speaking of. I am resolved, says he to some of his Acquaintance, to have one Gentleman in my Family at least. In order thereto, he gave his Son Education, and then put him to an Attorney: this entitled the young Fellow to dress out, and keep, what he call’d, good Company; these led him to Pleasures, Gallantry, and many other Extravagancies; in fine, the old Man broke his Heart; and the young one in a short time was utterly ruined. But how much happier would he probably have been, had he kept to his proper Sphere, and been a Coachman too! It frequently happens, that honest industrious Men among the common Trades, as well as others, grow wealthy, and consequently are ambitious of giving their Children Learning; now as these People have usually but a very small Share themselves, they know little more of it than the Name: they send a Boy to School, and because they hear him speak hard Words, and see him hammering at a Latin Exercise, sagely conclude that he has Learning; when it is fifty to one, that, comparatively speaking, he knows nothing. It requires a great deal of Time, Diligence, and Application for a Boy to become a good Grammarian, tho’ taught by the best Methods and the best Masters; what then must be the Fate of those who are under bad Teachers? and that there are some such, I believe will not be disputed. But supposing a Boy really acquires some Knowledge; let us see of what Use it will be to him: his Father is perhaps a Baker, and it is convenient to him to bring his Son up to his own Business; what does a Baker want with Latin? nothing. Besides, continued Disuse will make him forget it; or, should he retain it, of what Use could it be to him, but to make him pedantic and self-conceited? But perhaps upon the Presumption that this Boy is a Scholar, the honest Baker, desirous that his Son should cut a Figure, sends him to the University, and he becomes a Divine: but what Pity is it that a good Baker should be spoiled? The innocent young Man, tho’ spirited up by his fond mistaken Parents, has perhaps no Talents, no Genius, no Interest; what then must be his Fate? why—he must drudge, and court, and wait his whole Life, and at last gain nothing. What can be more mistaken than this Conduct, and yet what more common? It may be urged, that these are Instances of illiterate Parents only, and that People in better Life know better things: now allowing that to be the Case, still as Parents of this Kind are very numerous, they stand in great need of being set right, as the Errors they commit by this false Education are productive of many Evils.

Every Nation has it’s Custom of dividing the People into Classes. The _Police_ of _France_ divide them into Quality, Noblesse, Artificers, and Peasantry. _England_, a mix’d Government, and a trading Nation, have the Nobility, Gentry, Mercantile or Commercial People, Mechanics, and Peasantry. Were we to subdivide the People, we might run it to an Infinity: to avoid Confusion therefore, I will select five Classes; _viz._ the Nobility, the Gentry, the genteel Trades, all those particularly which require large Capitals, the common Trades, and the Peasantry. But tho’ for the Sake of Perspicuity and Brevity, I confine my Observations to these, yet they may occasionally be applied to others; and tho’ _London_ may in general be called the Scene of Action thro’ my whole Design, yet is it equally applicable to, and intended for, the Benefit of the whole Kingdom.

Persons of Rank and Quality are, I doubt, placed in too high a Sphere for any Instructions of mine to reach them; or should this Attempt fall into their Hands, what Chance is there for it’s being useful to them, since they seem to have every Advantage, every Help at command. Still as true Wisdom consists in seeking Instruction wherever it can be found, and as the lowest among Mankind may drop a Hint that may be useful to the highest, I will, with all due Deference and Respect, venture to speak my Thoughts; and if they reach the Ears of the Great, I dare hope, they will at least commend the Design, if they cannot applaud the Execution.

Human Nature (as daily Experience shews us) is, in the general, alike in all, from the Prince to the Peasant: the same Weaknesses attend us; the same Passions torment us; the same Diseases kill us: all are the Work of ONE GREAT ARTIST! all are born for the same great End! The Gifts of Fortune indeed are innumerably different; the Advantages of Education very many; and as a Train of Vices corrupts our Manners, so a Succession of Virtues may be said to enoble our Birth and purify our Blood. Hence it is we often see those exalted Virtues in the Great and Noble inherited by their Posterity; and hence too we often discover, even where Pains are taken to conceal it, an inbred Dignity, a Mein and Aspect superior to the Generality of Men. Still this Rule is by no Means universal; for the same Experience shews us, that great Men can do little things; even such as the private and obscure would be ashamed of. And how so? because Passion, not Reason, is their Guide. Parents then, we see, even of the highest Rank, are under an indispensable Obligation of regulating the Manners of their Children. Philosophers say, that all Passions are in all Men; but that their Predominance is unequal, and different in different Men: if so, the Great stand in most need of having them subdued, or at least regulated, as the Power to indulge them is greater in them than in others. But granting that Parents of Quality are convinced of these Truths, and take all the Steps already recommended for training up their Children in proper Decorum; granting too, that they design every thing for their real Advantage; they have still many things both to do and avoid which are not common to all.

Their first Care must be to avoid Sycophants, Flatterers, and Hypocrites; they are but too constant Attendants on the Great, and their Business is to diffuse an imperceptible Poison (if I may be allowed the Metaphor) over both Parents and Children. Nothing is so amiable as Truth, nothing more desirable, and yet nothing more difficult to reach the Great. If a Nobleman has a Child whose Parts are weak, whose Genius is slow and shallow, it is undoubtedly a Misfortune, but cannot be his Fault: the natural Blindness of Parents keeps them from seeing these Defects so clearly as another; but the unnatural, at least unmanly Artifices of the Flatterer totally prevent their seeing them at all: and thus the noble Heir is mistakenly taught to think himself what Nature has forbid he shall ever be.

Another Care is, that Youth of Quality, who have Parts and Quickness, be not suffered to waste the first Flower of their Age in Idleness: it is a grievous Error, yet very common. I have already observed, that Parents who know nothing are injudiciously, and even anxiously solicitous to have their Children Scholars; and by a strange reverse Infatuation, Parents of Rank are often very indifferent about it. This Error is undoubtedly sometimes owing to themselves only by a supine Negligence in their own natural Temper; but it is much oftener owing to the false Praises given by those that have both the Parents and the Child’s Ear. A young Heir soon knows the Title, Dignity and Estate he is born to possess; too soon does he know his Independence, and too apt is he to grow careless about his Learning on this very Account, but if to these Impediments be added imaginary Excellence and Knowledge, thro’ the daily Flattery of a Dependent, what is likely to be the Consequence? why, that he will remain ignorant his whole Life. For who will take Pains to learn, that is firmly persuaded he knows enough already? and that many of our young Noblemen are trained up in this Disposition, nobody, I believe, will deny: it is true that Time may convince them of their Error; but it will then perhaps be too late to recover what they have lost.

The Education of a Nobleman should contain every thing that is both useful and ornamental. As he is more conspicuous than others, as he always stands on an Eminence, his Education should be such as may reflect a Lustre on every one that beholds him. He is to be considered as a Pillar of the Laws, an Honour and an Ornament to the Age he lives in. To this End he is to study first, Languages; that is to say, two of the dead ones, _viz._ _Latin_ and _Greek_; and of the living ones, besides his Mother-tongue, _French_ at least. The Learned disagree very much as to the Variety of Languages necessary to be acquired; some are of Opinion, that besides these already named, _Italian_, _Spanish_, _Portuguese_, and more yet, are becoming the Education of a great Man; and urge in their Favour, that the more Languages are gained, the more the Mind is enlarged: others dissent from this, and maintain, that a great Variety rather confuses the Mind than otherwise; that _Latin_ and _Greek_ are indisputably the Languages of all learned Men; after those, _French_, and at most _Italian_, are all that need be added, as every thing may be found in these, either originally or translated into them: but they farther argue, that it is a great Waste of Time, spent merely in the Acquisition of Languages, when so many nobler Studies are to be pursued; Studies which at once strike the Mind, and constitute true Science. This last Reasoning has, I think, great Force; but here for a Moment let me leave the Nobleman, to make an Observation on general Life. Languages, besides being considered as general Parts of Education, are particularly necessary in certain Circumstances of Life. If one, whether for Education or Business, goes to reside in _Holland_, _France_, _Spain_, or _Italy_, it would be an Absurdity not to attain the Language of the Country; so if another is to be a Merchant, surely he should not be a Stranger to the Language of his Correspondents; thus are these, and many other things more or less necessary, just as they are circumstanced: and therefore should Parents, besides the Education they bestow on their Children, as suited to their Station in general, join to it that which is necessary in particular. But, to return;

Besides Languages, a Nobleman is to learn Philosophy, both Moral and Natural; Mathematics; the ancient and modern Laws of our own Country; and the Customs, Laws and Manners of other Nations. He should particularly be a Critic in our own History, and our own Language; because they are what in real Life he will have most occasion to exercise. To this solid Learning should be added the Embellishments of polite Literature, Poetry, Painting, and Music; and to compleat the Character, Dancing, Fencing, Riding and Architecture. Tho’ this is going a considerable Way, it is much the least Part of what ought reasonably to be expected from him, considering the Light he stands in. It is of great Consequence that his Preceptor have a good Head; but it is of much more that he has an honest Heart. He is to humanize his Pupil’s Soul, and form him for all those Actions that will give him a real, not a fancied Dignity. He should raise in him an ardent Love of his own Country; but, as every other Nation has it’s Virtues as well as Vices, he should at the same time avoid the customary Prejudice of allowing them nothing. While he is taught to think and act nobly, he should be informed that the Knowledge, the Care and the Improvement of his Estate, are essential Obligations, and such as cannot be dispensed with. He must be easy of Access, without which Truth will seldom reach his Ear; nor will he be able to distinguish Merit from Demerit; or know how to right the Injured, or punish the Injurer. While he maintains his Dignity, he must be ready to condescend to Inferiors with an humble Deportment where necessary; and be taught to see and feel another’s Woe: which nothing will more inforce, than convincing him of the Instability of all human Grandeur. His Dress and Behaviour should be like his Quality, noble; yet perfectly free from Affectation, Vanity and Pride. He must be taught to know, that ’tis not for himself alone he is to live, but, from the politest Manners, a wise Conduct, and a benevolent Heart, to diffuse Pleasure and Joy to all that know him. Vice and Virtue are to be placed before him in their genuine Light; and the Beauty of the one made a Contrast to the Deformity of the other. While he is taught to distinguish Honour from Infamy, Nobility from Meanness, the utmost Care should be taken to shew him how much he would sink beneath a Man, should he become a Slave to any irregular Passion. He should, for Example sake, as well as his own, be instructed to shun every thing that is mean, base or vicious; and, in a word, be endowed with all those Virtues that will make him generous, noble, wise, and good. Much more might be said on this Occasion, much more might be added; but as the Great are supplied with far abler Helps from other Hands, I will only add on this Head, that if the Admonitions here offered be reduced to Practice, every other Virtue, even the most heroic, will become familiar and easy.

My next Topic is the Education of a young Lady of the first Quality; from which, if the Course of my Design did not make it necessary, I would gladly be excused: for as the most delicate Flowers require the tenderest Treatment, so the conducting a Woman of Quality thro’ the first Stages, and ushering her into the World, is of all others the nicest Part to act. Still, as Nature and Reason are my Guides; by them I hope to be enabled to offer some Aid, however small, for the promoting this great End.

As all Parents have a Right to exercise a proper Authority, so all Children, however high their Rank, should be taught to obey. Great Spirits may think Obedience mean; but Parents are to remember their Children’s Happiness is at stake: without Obedience they cannot regulate their Passions: and if not regulated, they have but little Chance for Happiness. Misfortunes with a Coronet, Misfortunes with a Coach and Six, are still Misfortunes; and it is the Business of every Parent so to conduct their Children, that they may on their part avoid them, or so to fortify them that they may bear them as they ought. But, as it is most agreeable to good Sense, I will conclude that Parents of the highest Rank are convinced of this, and have employed the Infant Age of their Children accordingly. What next is to be done? What Education is most proper for a young Lady of the first Quality? Such surely as will distinguish her from the Crowd; such as will more adorn her Mind, than the Jewels she wears adorn her Person.

The Errors committed in the Education of the Children of private Persons are many, from the Parents educating them above their Rank; still there is one general Excuse may be made for them, which is, that as the Turns of Fortune are sometimes very great, they don’t know what Occasion they may have for it. But in Persons of Quality the Case is different; they are already at the Summit, and their Education should suit their Rank. As soon therefore as the first Stage is over, (not to mention what she may have learnt during that Period) a young Lady’s Time is to be esteemed precious: Reading, Writing, Working, Dancing, _French_, _Italian_ and Music are all to be taught her; and that not superficially, as is too much the Custom; not so as to puzzle and confound her Understanding, but to enlarge and improve it. A certain Author says, that there is not a Man in a thousand who reads well; if so, and Men assert a Superiority of Knowledge, it will be no unfair Conclusion to say, there is not a Woman in two thousand that does: but I hope this Gentleman’s Assertion is not true, and then the Conclusion falls of course. Still it is very certain, that much more is required to read our Mother-Tongue well, than is commonly imagined; and as that is really graceful, a young Lady should be taught to set a great Value on it. To know the Words and their Meaning is not sufficient; she must know the Pointing, the Emphasis and the Cadence; and she must know too, how, in different Parts, and on different Subjects, to modify her Voice, or she will never read well. To read with Energy and Beauty, we should know our Subject; and here the Understanding is concerned; this gain’d, we have nothing more to do but to keep close to Nature; for the greatest Fault committed in reading is, the throwing ourselves out of Nature. As I have formerly attended the Lectures of several public Professors, I remember one who committed this Fault of throwing himself out of Nature, as I have just observed; when he read, he put on a Tone of Voice not his own; when he laid down his Paper to explain what he had been reading, he was himself again; and thus was he in and out of himself, if I may be allowed the Expression, ten times in an Hour. And yet this was a Man of Letters, a Man of Science, a Philosopher!

The Hand-writing of a young Lady should have an easy Elegance in it; a Medium between the _Italian_, which tho’ beautiful to see is usually wrote very slowly, and that Meanness of Hand too common in the Sex. Either of these Faults in a Lady’s Hand-writing will appear in their true Light, if we consider that the Custom of writing familiar Epistles is one of the most important Steps in her Education. Nothing tends more to open the Mind, nothing bids fairer for gaining a Knowledge of the World, next to the seeing it, than the giving and receiving one another’s Thoughts with Freedom, in a virtuous Intercourse of friendly Epistles. Now an evident Obstacle to this is the Manner of Writing; if a young Lady’s Hand is a fine _Italian_, she hates the Thoughts of writing a Letter, because it will take up so much Time; and if it be a bad Hand, she says her Scrawl is so frightful, she is asham’d that any body should see it. But there is another important Reason for familiarizing a young Lady to her Pen, which is that of writing correctly. For a fine Lady not to spell with exact Propriety, is frightful beyond Expression; but when she has gained that, she possesses nothing till she writes with Grammar, with Stile, and a suitable Turn of Expression. Some, it is true, have by Nature a happier Turn this way than others, and may be said to be born with a Talent for Writing; but tho’ this be granted, yet certainly a great deal may be obtained by a due Care of their Education in this Point.

Needle-work is by no means below the Dignity of a Woman of Quality, therefore she should certainly be taught it; for tho’ it may not be called a thing she wants, yet the very Change of Employment is often a Pleasure: besides that the knowing it is really useful. I have seen a Woman of Quality at her sick Lord’s Bed-side, so far from being ashamed to own she could use a Needle, that what things of that kind were wanted during the Course of his Illness she would let nobody do for him but herself; and thus at the same time that her Tenderness and Concern proved the Sincerity of her Affection, she proved that it was not below her Quality to be notable too.

Dancing I mention in course, tho’ it is needless to recommend it here, not only because I have elsewhere done justice to this Part of Education, but because all are convinced of it’s Importance, as an Accomplishment which strikes the Beholder’s Eye, and gives more or less favourable Impressions in proportion as we excel in it. But here, to avoid Error, the End of Dancing should be remembered; that it is not so much for the sake of shining at a Ball (tho’ that too may sometimes be necessary) but to give an easy Air and Grace to all the Motions of the Body.

_French_, in it’s Purity and Perfection, is a great Ornament to a Lady’s Education; but that is not all: it is not only polite, but highly useful; both as she may have frequent Occasions to speak it, and as there are many good Authors in that Language not yet translated into ours.

_Italian_ and Music for a fine Lady should be inseparable; for tho’ it is allowed that our Music is vastly improved within half a Century past, yet the Critics in that way insist, that Music in our Language is incapable of equalling the _Italian_, from the great Number of Consonants it abounds with.

When a young Lady is advanced thus far, she has certainly done a great deal; but not enough. If she is taught to think that the Great must be distinguished by their superior Knowledge, she will be animated with a Desire to acquire it; and not sit down contented with an inferior Degree of it. Still, as deep Studies and very close Application seem by Nature more the Province of Men than Women, so I have not urged the Study of the more learned Languages; and will leave this Point to be determined by the Parents and Preceptors. History, ’tis true, gives us many Examples of Queens and Ladies of every Rank, who were distinguished by their great Learning. Sir _Thomas More_, High Chancellor of _England_, in a Letter to his Daughter, commends her for the Purity and Elegance of her _Latin_; and Madam _Dacier_, Daughter of _Tanaquil Faber_, is well known (besides her other learned Works) to have translated _Homer_ from the _Greek_: but these are rare Examples, and such perhaps as should rather be admired than imitated. Nature, I think, points out to us, that the Education of a Woman should rather be sprightly than grave; thus polite Literature seems a fitter Study for a Lady than Syllogisms in Logic. However, that a Lady of Quality may by no means be deficient, she should have, besides what is already recommended, a Knowledge of Arithmetic, Geography, and Drawing; to which may, with great Propriety, be added, at least a general Acquaintance with Moral and Experimental Philosophy.

The Sketch here given is not to be considered as the Edifice, but the Ground-work, the Foundation alone; the Superstructure is still to be raised. In order thereto a young Lady is to be nicely directed what Language she should speak, and what shun: what ought to be her Sentiments, her Deportment, and her Actions. But first she should be taught to know that the World has it’s Eyes upon her, and that in proportion as she increases in Merit, so much nearer will she approach to gaining universal Admiration and Esteem. The Reasonableness of this Admonition will appear, if it be considered how many Actions we do unworthy ourselves, only because we are unobserved, or at least think we are so; whereas by keeping our Attention awake, and considering ourselves as always beheld, we shall often blush at the very Approach of Vice and Folly, and thus nobly fly from them. Yet this Consideration of being beheld, tho’ in itself a Virtue, must be carefully inculcated and nicely distinguished, lest it degenerate into a vain Desire of Applause: her Business is to deserve Esteem, but not to look for it. We often see a half-bred Player stare about him when he has finished his Speech, as if he would beg a Clap, a Smile, or a Nod of Approbation; but we never see this in a thorough bred one; he attends to his Part, to his Business, and nothing else; he knows that the best way to obtain and secure Applause, is to deserve it.

I have said a young Lady should be nicely directed what Books she is to read; indeed it is too nice a Matter for me to determine; Mr. _Addison_, in one of his _Spectators_, has, in a burlesque Way, given a Sort of Lady’s Library; but I wish he had reversed it, and told them seriously what Books would grace a Lady’s Closet, and improve her Mind. For my own Part I think nothing is more difficult, even among Men, than a proper Choice of Books. Wisdom and Virtue are the great Sciences we are born to learn; Books and Men are the Channels to convey the Knowledge of them to us. Now most Parents give their Children some general Cautions against bad Company, but Books are usually thrown into one undistinguished Heap: and tho’ some perhaps are pointed out to us as good, we are not instructed to shun the bad; at least they are still open to our View. Witness the Swarms of lewd Plays, Poems and Romances, calculated to inflame the Minds, and corrupt the Hearts of the Readers: witness the Sophistry and false Reasoning of many Writers, who take Pride in shewing how ingeniously they can deceive: witness the Loads of Lumber produced by those, whose Talents have been mistaken by making them Scholars without Genius: and witness too the Train of Trifles the present Age abounds with. From this clear and rational View of the State of Books, is it not apparent how liable we are to be misled? True it is, that we may read our whole Lives and learn nothing, nay far worse than nothing; learn Vice, Error, and Impiety. Since then this Point is of such Consequence to all, those in exalted Stations of both Sexes should have very able and faithful Guides herein; as from their Influence so much Good or Bad must flow. Still I must beg leave to caution Parents of the highest Quality, to imprint on their Children’s Minds and Hearts this Maxim, that all their Studies should tend to make them wise and good. Convinced of this, as they advance in Years, their own Judgment and Goodness of Heart will, in great measure, instruct them what to read, and what to avoid.

A young Lady should be taught to speak her Mother-tongue with great Clearness, Purity, and Elegance; nothing coarse, mean, or vulgar should ever drop from her Lips; nothing uncouth, strained, or affected; the one debases her Quality, and the other her Understanding. Great Ladies may perhaps think that their Greatness entitles them to say any thing; but where this happens, it is certainly an Error in their Education; or at least it is one in their Practice. There is yet a third Error in Speech which Women of Rank should carefully avoid; an Error consistent with good Sense, but good Sense obscured; that of catching every new-coin’d Word. The _English_ being a living Language, is subject to great Variations and Changes; but is now deservedly esteemed in high Perfection, as it is certainly stronger, more expressive, and more copious than heretofore. Still there is Reason to fear, that every Change is not an Amendment; and if it be, a Lady should not be the first to adopt it: yet so it happens, that a Desire to appear wise and learned sometimes makes them over-shoot themselves, and thus by aiming too high, they are liable to fall too low.

The Sentiments of a young Lady of Quality should be noble, virtuous, and pure. While she is surrounded with external Grandeur, she must be taught to support a Dignity of Mind, without which, all her Pomp will be mere Farce and Pageantry, and only tend to inflame her Vanity; she must be taught to know, that the noblest Sentiments are those which inspire her with a Love of Virtue; and to be truly great, she must condescend frequently to revolve in her Mind the Hardships, Sorrow, Pain, and Sufferings of the various States beneath her: above all, she must be taught to maintain a spotless Innocence; and live in a constant Resolution to suffer any thing, however great, rather than disgrace her Birth and Quality by any Action unworthy of herself.

Her Deportment must answer her Quality, and be elevated, majestic, and noble; such as will strike us with Awe, at the same time that we see in it a Complacency and Affability which charms us: such as will not suffer even the most bold and abandoned to offer the least Indecency or Rudeness, at the same time that it discovers a Heart susceptible of the tenderest Impressions. An easy Grace, a lively chearful Air should accompany all she says and does; but lest this should degenerate into Levity, she must be instructed never to throw off, that great Ornament of the Sex, Modesty.

Her Actions must be such as will contribute to others Happiness and her own; such as will reflect a Lustre on herself, and attract the Beholders of them to an unfeigned Esteem for her: Generosity, Benevolence, Charity, and Humility, accompanied with a Sweetness of Temper, should alternately prevail: and if the Distresses of others sometimes intrude too far upon her, (which from their great Severity they are apt to do) let her not add Misery to Misery, by dropping the Air of her Countenance, or use any Bitterness of Expression, at the same time that she refuses to relieve.

I have here laboured to shew what Education is necessary to adorn a Woman of Quality; and will leave it to abler Pens to refine, to correct, and improve it. What I hope and wish is, that the Plan here laid down may be deemed natural, practicable, and no way repugnant to good Sense: nothing stoical, wild, or romantic; nothing, in short, (allowing for the Difference of Genius, Health, and other Circumstances) but what every Woman of Quality may and ought to be. But before I quit this Head, I cannot help remarking how injuriously Men often think and speak of the Capacities of the other Sex. If all be true that they urge, (which with some is still a Doubt) that the Understandings of Women are weaker than those of Men, yet it by no means excuses our excluding them from Education. Nature indeed seems to have formed the Men strong in Mind and Body, that they may labour either with their Understandings or their Limbs as Occasion requires; the Women more tender, for Employments of a gentler Kind: thus each have their several Provinces: allowing then the Woman to be the weaker Vessel, that is, neither her Frame nor Faculties so strong as the Man’s, does it imply that she has no Strength, no Faculties at all? by no Means. Experience shews us that the Sex have Wit, Judgment, and a Capacity to learn; how then can we justify our too general Neglect of them? But this Error is of great Consequence even to ourselves. If our Love for the Sex extends no farther than a gross Sense, we miss our Aim if we expect to find Happiness; or if we go so far as to consider them useful in their domestic Capacity, that will not secure to us the agreeable: good Sense, and good Temper, improved more or less by Education, should be every Man’s View in a Partner for Life; and where shall we find them, if their Education be universally neglected? A rational Man should choose a rational Companion; but how will such be found, if Pains are taken to keep them ignorant? Thus it is evident, that we are injuring ourselves, and Posterity too, by this unworthy Treatment of the Sex. Still it seems reasonable, that as Men are to bear the Burden of Business, they should have superior Education, as well as superior Strength; therefore the only thing here contended for, is, that every Woman should have her Mind improved, her Understanding enlarged by such an Education as is best suited to her Condition in Life: such an one, in short, as will make her lastingly pleasing by being both useful and agreeable.