Chapter XIII: Act III: Scene V

ENTER COB, TO HIM TIB.

COB. What, Tib, Tib, I say.

TIB. How now, what cuckold is that knocks so hard?
Oh, husband, is't you? What's the news?

COB. Nay, you have stunn'd me, i'faith; you have given me
a knock on the forehead will stick by me: cuckold?
'Swounds, cuckold?

TIB. Away, you fool, did I know it was you that knock'd?
Come, come, you may call me as bad when you list.

COB. May I? 'swounds, Tib, you are a whore.

TIB. 'Sheart, you lie in your throat.

COB. How, the lie? and in my throat too? do you long to
be stabb'd, ha?

TIB. Why, you are no soldier?

COB. Mass, that's true, when was Bobadilla here? that
rogue, that slave, that fencing Burgullion? I'll tickle
him, i'faith.

TIB. Why, what's the matter?

COB. Oh, he hath basted me rarely, sumptuously: but I have
it here will sauce him, oh, the doctor, the honestest old
Trojan in all Italy, I do honour the very flea of his dog:
a plague on him, he put me once in a villainous filthy fear:
marry, it vanish'd away like the smoke of tobacco: but I was
smok'd soundly first, I thank the devil, and his good angel
my guest: well, wife, or Tib, (which you will) get you in,
and lock the door, I charge you; let nobody into you, not
Bobadilla himself, nor the devil in his likeness; you are a
woman; you have flesh and blood enough in you; therefore be
not tempted; keep the door shut upon all comers.

TIB. I warrant you there shall nobody enter here without my
consent.

COB. Nor with your consent, sweet Tib, and so I leave you.

TIB. It's more than you know, whether you leave me so.

COB. How?

TIB. Why, sweet.

COB. Tut, sweet or sour, thou art a flower.
Keep close thy door, I ask no more.

[EXEUNT.]