Chapter III: Act I: Scene II

ENTER LORENZO JUNIOR, WITH MUSCO.

MUS. Yes, sir, on my word he opened it, and read the contents.

LOR. JU. It scarce contents me that he did so. But, Musco, didst
thou observe his countenance in the reading of it, whether he were
angry or pleased?

MUS. Why, sir, I saw him not read it.

LOR. JU. No? how knowest thou then that he opened it?

MUS. Marry, sir, because he charg'd me on my life to tell nobody
that he opened it, which, unless he had done, he would never fear
to have it revealed.

LOR. JU. That's true: well, Musco, hie thee in again,
Lest thy protracted absence do lend light,
[ENTER STEPHANO.]
To dark suspicion: Musco, be assured
I'll not forget this thy respective love.

STEP. Oh, Musco, didst thou not see a fellow here in a
what-sha-call-him doublet; he brought mine uncle a letter
even now?

MUS. Yes, sir, what of him?

STEP. Where is he, canst thou tell?

MUS. Why, he is gone.

STEP. Gone? which way? when went he? how long since?

MUS. It's almost half an hour ago since he rode hence.

STEP. Whoreson scanderbag rogue; oh that I had a horse; by God's
lid, I'd fetch him back again, with heave and ho.

MUS. Why, you may have my master's bay gelding, an you will.

STEP. But I have no boots, that's the spite on it.

MUS. Then it's no boot to follow him. Let him go and hang, sir.

STEP. Ay, by my troth; Musco, I pray thee help to truss me a
little; nothing angers me, but I have waited such a while for him
all unlac'd and untrussed yonder; and now to see he is gone the
other way.

MUS. Nay, I pray you stand still, sir.

STEP. I will, I will: oh, how it vexes me.

MUS. Tut, never vex yourself with the thought of such a base
fellow as he.

STEP. Nay, to see he stood upon points with me too.

MUS. Like enough so; that was because he saw you had so few at
your hose.

STEP. What! Hast thou done? Godamercy, good Musco.

MUS. I marle, sir, you wear such ill-favoured coarse stockings,
having so good a leg as you have.

STEP. Foh! the stockings be good enough for this time of the
year; but I'll have a pair of silk, e'er it be long: I think my
leg would shew well in a silk hose.

MUS. Ay, afore God, would it, rarely well.

STEP. In sadness I think it would: I have a reasonable good leg?

MUS. You have an excellent good leg, sir: I pray you pardon me.
I have a little haste in, sir.

STEP. A thousand thanks, good Musco.

[EXIT.]

What, I hope he laughs not at me; an he do --

LOR. JU. Here is a style indeed, for a man's senses to leap over,
e'er they come at it: why, it is able to break the shins of any
old man's patience in the world. My father read this with
patience? Then will I be made an Eunuch, and learn to sing
Ballads. I do not deny, but my father may have as much patience as
any other man; for he used to take physic, and oft taking physic
makes a man a very patient creature. But, Signior Prospero, had
your swaggering Epistle here arrived in my father's hands at such
an hour of his patience, I mean, when he had taken physic, it is to
be doubted whether I should have read "sweet villain here." But,
what? My wise cousin; Nay then, I'll furnish our feast with one
Gull more toward a mess; he writes to me of two, and here's one,
that's three, i'faith. Oh for a fourth! now, Fortune, or never,
Fortune!

STEP. Oh, now I see who he laughed at: he laughed at somebody in
that letter. By this good light, an he had laughed at me, I would
have told mine uncle.

LOR. JU. Cousin Stephano: good morrow, good cousin, how fare you?

STEP. The better for your asking, I will assure you. I have been
all about to seek you. Since I came I saw mine uncle; and i'faith
how have you done this great while? Good Lord, by my troth, I am
glad you are well, cousin.

LOR. JU. And I am as glad of your coming, I protest to you, for I
am sent for by a private gentleman, my most special dear friend, to
come to him to Florence this morning, and you shall go with me,
cousin, if it please you, not else, I will enjoin you no further
than stands with your own consent, and the condition of a friend.

STEP. Why, cousin, you shall command me an 'twere twice so far as
Florence, to do you good; what, do you think I will not go with
you? I protest --

LOR. JU. Nay, nay, you shall not protest

STEP. By God, but I will, sir, by your leave I'll protest more to
my friend than I'll speak of at this time.

LOR. JU. You speak very well, sir.

STEP. Nay, not so neither, but I speak to serve my turn.

LOR. JU. Your turn? why, cousin, a gentleman of so fair sort as
you are, of so true carriage, so special good parts; of so dear and
choice estimation; one whose lowest condition bears the stamp of a
great spirit; nay more, a man so graced, gilded, or rather, to use
a more fit metaphor, tinfoiled by nature; not that you have a
leaden constitution, coz, although perhaps a little inclining to
that temper, and so the more apt to melt with pity, when you fall
into the fire of rage, but for your lustre only, which reflects as
bright to the world as an old ale-wife's pewter again a good time;
and will you now, with nice modesty, hide such real ornaments as
these, and shadow their glory as a milliner's wife doth her wrought
stomacher, with a smoky lawn or a black cyprus? Come, come; for
shame do not wrong the quality of your dessert in so poor a kind;
but let the idea of what you are be portrayed in your aspect, that
men may read in your looks: "Here within this place is to be seen
the most admirable, rare, and accomplished work of nature!"
Cousin, what think you of this?

STEP. Marry, I do think of it, and I will be more melancholy and
gentlemanlike than I have been, I do ensure you.

LOR. JU. Why, this is well: now if I can but hold up this humour
in him, as it is begun, Catso for Florence, match him an she can.
Come, cousin.

STEP. I'll follow you.

LOR. JU. Follow me! you must go before!

STEP. Must I? nay, then I pray you shew me, good cousin.

[EXEUNT.]