Chapter XII: Rachel Makes a Mistake

Rachel found Polly crying in the kitchen on Sunday after the Morning Service.

"Why Polly, what is the matter?" she said.

"It's them men in the choir," sobbed the girl. "There won't be none of them at service to-night. It's a reg'lar shame."

"But how do you know?" asked Rachel.

"I ran home after Church just now and I heard father telling mother that they had all made up their minds to keep away as the Vicar had taken no notice of their letters."

"The Vicar never takes any notice of anonymous letters," said Rachel.

"And it's a shame that they've written 'em," said Polly wiping her eyes, "and you and the Vicar so kind to everybody. I think it's right mean of 'em. Why the master, he is thinking of 'em all day and as for that, all night too. He'd give up his dinner and everything else for the men if he could help them. I'm right ashamed of them."

Rachel was silent, but she did not mean to sit down and do nothing. She made up her mind that if the men did not come, girls and women should take their place, and Luke should still have a choir. She said nothing to Luke at dinner about what Polly had told her, but as soon as it was over and her husband had gone to open the Sunday School, she started off to see Mrs. Stone.

"I want you to give me the names and addresses of any girls in the place who can sing in tune," she said, after telling her of what she had just heard. "I mean to get up a choir for to-night's service."

"What a good idea," said Mrs. Stone. "But I don't see how you can go round to them all as they live in different parts of the town and it is beginning to rain."

"I don't mind the rain, but I do mind that Luke should find himself without a choir to-night, and I mean to get one together."

"Well then you must let me lend you my cloak," said Mrs. Stone, amused at the determination in Rachel's voice. She saw her in quite a new light this afternoon.

The rain came down in torrents as Rachel made her way to different parts of the town, but she hardly noticed it. She was happy in the thought that at last she was really helping Luke with his work, and looked forward to seeing his pleasure and surprise.

Some of those to whom she went had never seen her before. They did not all belong to St Mark's congregation. But Rachel's charming personality and persuasive ways won their hearts at once and not one refused her help. In fact they quite entered into her plan and seemed keen to do what they could in the matter. When she had found twelve who were willing to form the choir she returned home. It was only then that she realised how wet and tired she was. But the happy consciousness that she was helping Luke made her hurry home in good spirits.

She was a little later than she thought and she found from the fact that his hat was in the hall that Luke was already back from the Sunday School and in his study.

"Polly," said Rachel, as she looked into the kitchen on her way upstairs, "lay the table for tea and put the kettle on. I shall be downstairs in a few minutes." As she went upstairs she was wondering when she would tell Luke of the surprise that awaited him. She determined not to tell him till after tea. She liked the feeling of anticipation.

"You have been out," said Luke as he sat down to the tea table. "Did you get very wet?"

"Yes, I got soaked. I hope you did not."

He told her no, as when it was raining the hardest, he took refuge in his mother's rooms as she had a cold and had not been able to get to the school that afternoon.

He apparently forgot to ask Rachel where she had been, or what made her go out in such rain. His mind had started to work on the conversation he had just had with his mother which put his wife's walk in the rain out of his thoughts, and Rachel was glad as she did not want to tell her good news till later. Her husband, she noticed, was rather more silent than usual, and she began to wonder if he had already heard that his choir were going to desert him that night. She could not find any topic of conversation to interest him. But when tea was over and he was beginning to look at his watch she said:

"Do you know Luke what is going to happen to-night?"

"Yes, I know," he said quietly, "we are to have no choir," He rose as he spoke and looked at his wife with a smile. "I am not altogether sorry," he said.

"Not sorry? Why?" said Rachel, a little crestfallen.

"Because I think it will be a good object lesson to those members of the Town Council who attend my church."

"How do you mean?"

"I mean that they will see for themselves the result of their decision to have public concerts on Sunday evening in the Public Hall. They will miss the choir and so of course shall I."

Rachel looked across at her husband with a smile.

"I don't think you will miss it much," she said with a little laugh.

"Perhaps not," he answered. "Possibly the singing may be more hearty in consequence. But I have no doubt that the Councillors will miss it, and I hope may feel a little ashamed. Nothing really could have happened more conveniently than a choir strike at the moment, as it is only the third Sunday after the concerts have been set on foot. If the men were going to absent themselves it is as well it should be done at once."

Rachel felt a little uneasy.

"But of course you would like a choir if you could get one," she said.

"I don't think so," he answered.

"But," said Rachel, a little breathlessly, "if some girls were willing to come and sing you would not object, would you?"

Luke had been watching the rain which was coming down in torrents, but at Rachel's question he turned round sharply towards her.

"I should very much object," he said rising from the table. "It would frustrate any little good that may come of the strike. I hope no-one intends to fill their places."

Rachel turned pale. A sudden mad idea of going round to every girl she had called on that afternoon and asking them not to come crossed her mind, in the hope that Luke would never find out what she had done. But she put the suggestion away at once, not only because to do so in such a short time as she had at her disposal was impossible, but because it would be a cowardly thing to do. She must confess at once what she had been doing.

"I'm afraid you will be vexed," she said looking him straight in the face. "But I have got a choir of girls together and they will be at the church to-night."

Luke did not speak but stood looking at his wife, a look that Rachel did not understand. But it had the effect of making her say steadily, and with dignity:

"I did it for your sake Luke. I knew how much you would feel the loss of your choir."

"Another time," said Luke slowly, and with a smile that somehow hurt Rachel more than any number of words could have done, "I hope you will ask my advice before acting." He moved towards the door.

"Luke, just wait a minute," said Rachel, "If only you had talked over with me about the choir I probably would have been wiser. But I only knew from Polly that the men were not coming. I wish, oh I wish you would talk things over with me. You never tell me anything."

Luke stood with his hand on the door. He looked round at his wife's words. The sight of her anxious face touched him.

"I am sure that you thought you were doing wisely," he said, "but you see that my hopes are absolutely frustrated. They will say, if you can get another choir together so easily let the men off the evening service. You must not be surprised at my disappointment and indeed vexation. But before you do anything rash another time ask me, or indeed my mother. She could have given you excellent advice, and knowing all the circumstances she would not be so likely to make a mistake."

Rachel rose, she felt now was her opportunity to speak of what had been long on her mind.

"If you would only talk things out with me instead of keeping me in such complete ignorance of parish matters," she said with a little sob which Luke did not notice as his mind was full of his hopes being frustrated. "I can't help making mistakes when I know nothing. Why don't you sometimes consult with me?" The effort to speak and yet to say nothing that would give him a hint of her feelings towards his mother was so great, that she found herself trembling and leant against the mantle piece for support.

Luke hesitated before answering. If he had said what was at that moment in his mind he would have reminded her of her unwise action this afternoon, adding that he scarcely felt she was competent of giving him advice, or indeed of discussing any subject of importance with him; He had, moreover, slowly come to his mother's opinion that Rachel was not fitted in any way for parish work. The home was her sphere and no-one could possibly keep his home better for him. And if this afternoon's work was a specimen of Rachel's wisdom, he was thankful to his mother for opening his eyes to his wife's incapacity although occasionally he had doubted her judgment. But glancing at his wife as she stood leaning against the mantle piece, and, noticing the worried anxious expression of her face, he kept his thoughts to himself, saying:

"You have quite enough to worry you with the housekeeping bills I am sure. I don't want to add a grain of anxiety."

"But don't you see how much less I should worry if I knew a little of what is passing in your mind. I often wonder and wonder what you are thinking of when you sit silent and deep in thought. If you would only tell me sometimes."

He gave a little laugh.

"Oh well don't worry now any more about this," he said. "It will all be the same a hundred years hence." Then he added with forced cheerfulness, "It's no use crying over spilt milk. The thing is done and it can't be helped; and I know it has been done in kindness. Cheer up dear."

As he left the room Rachel sat down on the sofa. His last words had stung her.

"Done in kindness!" Why it had been done in the warmth of passionate love. She had braved the rain coming down in torrents, and had overtired herself just because she wanted to save him pain and to give him pleasure. And he had spoken coldly of kindness! She could scarcely bear it. Yet her pride was too much touched at the moment to allow of tears to come. For the first time she was sitting in judgment on her husband. Her idol had fallen from his throne. Had he been what she had fancied him to be he would never have allowed her to know all that his disappointment meant to him; and she could have borne it; but now the lack of gratitude on his part for her efforts, mistaken though they had been, struck her as astonishingly unlike the Luke of her dreams. It made her feel almost indignant. She felt sure his mother's influence was at the back of it. All her own tender feelings had disappeared. A cold pride had taken their place, and unconscious of any emotion she made her way upstairs to get ready for Church. She did not hurry, and when Luke called out that they ought to be starting as it was getting late, she told him not to wait for her. It was the first time they had not walked to evening service together.

Rachel had promised the girls that she would sit with them in the choir and lead the singing. She was astonished to find herself walking calmly up the aisle and taking her place in the Choir benches.

The singing went exceedingly well. The girls had good strong voices, and Rachel's voice, of which the congregation had been in ignorance, filled the Church. Now and then Luke found himself wondering to whom the sweet and full voice belonged, and it was only toward the end of the service that he discovered that it belonged to his wife.

He made no allusion to the absence of the men in his sermon; but when the service was over and most of the congregation had gone, he thanked the girls for their help. But Rachel was not there. She did not wait to walk home with him.