Chapter XXII: Act III: SCENE I. OLIVIA'S garden

_Enter_ VIOLA, _and_ Clown _with a tabor_.

_Vio._ Save thee, friend, and thy music: dost thou live
by thy tabor?

_Clo._ No, sir, I live by the church.

_Vio._ Art thou a churchman?

_Clo._ No such matter, sir: I do live by the church; for I 5
do live at my house, and my house doth stand by the church.

_Vio._ So thou mayst say, the king lies by a beggar, if a
beggar dwell near him; or, the church stands by thy tabor,
if thy tabor stand by the church.

_Clo._ You have said, sir. To see this age! A sentence 10
is but a cheveril glove to a good wit: how quickly the
wrong side may be turned outward!

_Vio._ Nay, that's certain; they that dally nicely with
words may quickly make them wanton.

_Clo._ I would, therefore, my sister had had no name, sir. 15

_Vio._ Why, man?

_Clo._ Why, sir, her name's a word; and to dally with
that word might make my sister wanton. But indeed
words are very rascals since bonds disgraced them.

_Vio._ Thy reason, man? 20

_Clo._ Troth, sir, I can yield you none without words;
and words are grown so false, I am loath to prove reason
with them.

_Vio._ I warrant thou art a merry fellow and carest for
nothing. 25

_Clo._ Not so, sir, I do care for something; but in my
conscience, sir, I do not care for you: if that be to care for
nothing, sir, I would it would make you invisible.

_Vio._ Art not thou the Lady Olivia's fool?

_Clo._ No, indeed, sir; the Lady Olivia has no folly: she 30
will keep no fool, sir, till she be married; and fools are as
like husbands as pilchards are to herrings; the husband's
the bigger: I am indeed not her fool, but her corrupter of
words.

_Vio._ I saw thee late at the Count Orsino's. 35

_Clo._ Foolery, sir, does walk about the orb like the sun,
it shines every where. I would be sorry, sir, but the fool
should be as oft with your master as with my mistress: I
think I saw your wisdom there.

_Vio._ Nay, an thou pass upon me, I'll no more with 40
thee. Hold, there's expenses for thee.

_Clo._ Now Jove, in his next commodity of hair, send
thee a beard!

_Vio._ By my troth, I'll tell thee, I am almost sick for
one; [_Aside_] though I would not have it grow on my chin. 45
Is thy lady within?

_Clo._ Would not a pair of these have bred, sir?

_Vio._ Yes, being kept together and put to use.

_Clo._ I would play Lord Pandarus of Phrygia, sir, to
bring a Cressida to this Troilus. 50

_Vio._ I understand you, sir; 'tis well begged.

_Clo._ The matter, I hope, is not great, sir, begging but
a beggar: Cressida was a beggar. My lady is within, sir.
I will construe to them whence you come; who you are
and what you would are out of my welkin, I might say 55
'element,' but the word is over-worn. [_Exit._

_Vio._ This fellow is wise enough to play the fool;
And to do that well craves a kind of wit:
He must observe their mood on whom he jests,
The quality of persons, and the time, 60
And, like the haggard, check at every feather
That comes before his eye. This is a practice
As full of labour as a wise man's art:
For folly that he wisely shows is fit;
But wise men, folly-fall'n, quite taint their wit. 65

_Enter_ SIR TOBY, _and_ SIR ANDREW.

_Sir To._ Save you, gentleman.

_Vio._ And you, sir.

_Sir And._ Dieu vous garde, monsieur.

_Vio._ Et vous aussi; votre serviteur.

_Sir And._ I hope, sir, you are; and I am yours. 70

_Sir To._ Will you encounter the house? my niece is
desirous you should enter, if your trade be to her.

_Vio._ I am bound to your niece, sir; I mean, she is the
list of my voyage.

_Sir To._ Taste your legs, sir; put them to motion. 75

_Vio._ My legs do better understand me, sir, than I understand
what you mean by bidding me taste my legs.

_Sir To._ I mean, to go, sir, to enter.

_Vio._ I will answer you with gait and entrance. But
we are prevented. 80

_Enter_ OLIVIA _and_ MARIA.

Most excellent accomplished lady, the heavens rain odours
on you!

_Sir And._ That youth's a rare courtier: 'Rain odours;'
well.

_Vio._ My matter hath no voice, lady, but to your own 85
most pregnant and vouchsafed ear.

_Sir And._ 'Odours,' 'pregnant,' and 'vouchsafed:' I'll
get 'em all three all ready.

_Oli._ Let the garden door be shut, and leave me to my
hearing. [_Exeunt Sir Toby, Sir Andrew, and Maria._] Give 90
me your hand, sir.

_Vio._ My duty, madam, and most humble service.

_Oli._ What is your name?

_Vio._ Cesario is your servant's name, fair princess.

_Oli._ My servant, sir! 'Twas never merry world 95
Since lowly feigning was call'd compliment:
You're servant to the Count Orsino, youth.

_Vio._ And he is yours, and his must needs be yours:
Your servant's servant is your servant, madam.

_Oli._ For him, I think not on him: for his thoughts, 100
Would they were blanks, rather than fill'd with me!

_Vio._ Madam, I come to whet your gentle thoughts
On his behalf.

_Oli._ O, by your leave, I pray you,
I bade you never speak again of him:
But, would you undertake another suit, 105
I had rather hear you to solicit that
Than music from the spheres.

_Vio._ Dear lady,--

_Oli._ Give me leave, beseech you. I did send,
After the last enchantment you did here,
A ring in chase of you: so did I abuse 110
Myself, my servant and, I fear me, you:
Under your hard construction must I sit,
To force that on you, in a shameful cunning,
Which you knew none of yours: what might you think?
Have you not set mine honour at the stake 115
And baited it with all the unmuzzled thoughts
That tyrannous heart can think? To one of your receiving
Enough is shown: a cypress, not a bosom,
Hides my heart. So, let me hear you speak.

_Vio._ I pity you.

_Oli._ That's a degree to love. 120

_Vio._ No, not a grize; for 'tis a vulgar proof,
That very oft we pity enemies.

_Oli._ Why, then, methinks 'tis time to smile again.
O world, how apt the poor are to be proud!
If one should be a prey, how much the better 125
To fall before the lion than the wolf!
[_Clock strikes._
The clock upbraids me with the waste of time.
Be not afraid, good youth, I will not have you:
And yet, when wit and youth is come to harvest,
Your wife is like to reap a proper man: 130
There lies your way, due west.

_Vio._ Then westward-ho!
Grace and good disposition attend your ladyship!
You'll nothing, madam, to my lord by me?

_Oli._ Stay:
I prithee, tell me what thou think'st of me. 135

_Vio._ That you do think you are not what you are.

_Oli._ If I think so, I think the same of you.

_Vio._ Then think you right: I am not what I am.

_Oli._ I would you were as I would have you be!

_Vio._ Would it be better, madam, than I am? 140
I wish it might, for now I am your fool.

_Oli._ O, what a deal of scorn looks beautiful
In the contempt and anger of his lip!
A murderous guilt shows not itself more soon
Than love that would seem hid: love's night is noon. 145
Cesario, by the roses of the spring,
By maidhood, honour, truth and every thing,
I love thee so, that, maugre all thy pride,
Nor wit nor reason can my passion hide.
Do not extort thy reasons from this clause, 150
For that I woo, thou therefore hast no cause;
But rather reason thus with reason fetter,
Love sought is good, but given unsought is better.

_Vio._ By innocence I swear, and by my youth,
I have one heart, one bosom and one truth, 155
And that no woman has; nor never none
Shall mistress be of it, save I alone.
And so adieu, good madam: never more
Will I my master's tears to you deplore.

_Oli._ Yet come again; for thou perhaps mayst move 160
That heart, which now abhors, to like his love. [_Exeunt._

LINENOTES:

OLIVIA'S garden] Pope. A garden. Rowe.

with a tabor.] Malone. meeting. Capell.

[2] _thy_] F1. _the_ F2 F3 F4.

[5] _sir: I do_] _sir: and yet I do_ Capell conj.

[7] _king_] _kings_ F1.

_lies_] _lives_ Collier (Capell conj.).

[15] _had had_] _had_ Hanmer.

[29] _not thou_] _thou not_ Steevens (1793), corrected in MS.

[32] _pilchards_] Capell. _pilchers_ Ff.

[35, 97] _Count_] _Duke_ Rowe.

[36] _orb ... sun_] Ff. _orb; like the sun_ Dyce.

[40] _an_] Pope. _and_ Ff.

[41] _expenses_] _sixpence_ Badham conj.

[Gives him a piece of money. Hanmer.

[45] [Aside] Edd.

[47] _bred_] _breed_ Malone conj.

[52] _begging_] Pope. _begging,_ Ff.

[54] _construe_] _conster_ Ff. _them_] _her Hanmer._

[55] _are_] F1. _is_ F2 F3 F4.

[61] _And_] Ff. _Not_ Rann (Johnson conj.). _Nor_ Harness.

[63] _wise man's_] _wise-mans_ Ff.

[64] _folly that he_] _he that folly_ Badham conj.

[65] _wise men, folly-fall'n, quite taint_] Capell (Theobald and
Tyrwhitt conj.). _wisemens folly falne, quite taint_ F1. _wise mens
folly falne, quite taint_ F2 F3 F4 (_faln_ F3 F4). _wise mens folly
fall'n, quite taints Rowe_ (ed. 2). _wise men's, folly fal'n, quite
taints_ Theobald. _wise men's folly shewn, quite taints_ Hanmer. _wise
men's folly, fall'n, quite taints_ Heath conj. _wise men, folly-blown,
quite taint their wit_ Anon. conj.

[65] SIR ANDREW] Andrew Ff.

[66] SCENE II. Pope. Sir To.] Sir And. Theobald.

[68, 70] Sir And.] Sir To. Theobald.

[68] _vous garde_] _vou guard_ Ff.

[69] _vous aussi_] _vouz ousie_ F1. _vouz ausie_ F2 F3 F4.

_votre serviteur_] _vostre serviture_ Ff.

[71] Sir To.] om. Theobald.

[80] MARIA] Gentlewoman Ff.

[88] _all ready_] Malone. _already_ F1 F2. _ready_ F3 F4.

[writing in his table-book. Collier (Collier MS.).

[89] _Let_] _Maria, let_ Capell conj. reading as verse.

[90] [Exeunt....] Rowe.

SCENE III. Pope.

[97] _You're_] _Y'are_ Ff.

[106] _I had_] _I'd_ Pope.

[107] _Dear_] _O dearest_ Hanmer.

_lady,--_] Theobald. _lady_. Ff.

[108] _Give_] _Nay, give_ Capell.

_beseech_] _I beseech_ F3 F4.

[109] _enchantment you did here_] Warburton (Thirlby conj.).
_enchantment you did heare_ F1 F2. _enchantment you did hear_ F3 F4.
_enchantment, you did hear_ Theobald.

[113] _shameful_] _shame-fac'd_ Collier MS.

[117] _one of_] om. Hanmer.

_receiving_] _conceiving_ Mason conj.

[118-120] S. Walker arranges as three lines ending _shown ... heart
... you_.

[118] _cypress_] _Cipresse_ F1 F2 F3. _Cipress_ F4. _Cyprus_ Theobald.

[119] _Hides_] _Hideth_ Delius conj.

_heart_ F1. _poor heart_ F2 F3 F4.

_me_] _us_ Rowe (ed. 2).

[121] _grize_] F1. _grice_ F2 F3 F4.

[125] _the better_] _better_ F3 F4.

[129] _is come_] _are come_ Pope (ed. 2).

[131, 132] S. Walker would end the lines _west ... disposition ...
ladyship_.

[132] _attend_] _'tend_ Steevens.

_your ladyship_] _you_ Hanmer.

[133] _me?_] Rowe. _me:_ Ff.

[135] _I_] om. Pope.

[140] _am?_] Ff. _am,_ Rowe (ed. 2).

[142, 143] _beautiful ... lip!_] Rowe. _beautiful? ... lip,_ Ff.

[148] _thy_] _my_ Collier MS.

[150] _thy_] _'wry_ Hanmer.

[157, 158] _it, save I alone. And_] _it._ Oli. _Save I alone!_ Vio.
_And_ Hanmer.

SCENE II. OLIVIA'S _house_.

_Enter_ SIR TOBY, SIR ANDREW, _and_ FABIAN.

_Sir And._ No, faith, I'll not stay a jot longer.

_Sir To._ Thy reason, dear venom, give thy reason.

_Fab._ You must needs yield your reason, Sir Andrew.

_Sir And._ Marry, I saw your niece do more favours to
the count's serving-man than ever she bestowed upon me; 5
I saw 't i' the orchard.

_Sir To._ Did she see thee the while, old boy? tell me
that.

_Sir And._ As plain as I see you now.

_Fab._ This was a great argument of love in her toward 10
you.

_Sir And._ 'Slight, will you make an ass o' me?

_Fab._ I will prove it legitimate, sir, upon the oaths of
judgement and reason.

_Sir To._ And they have been grand-jurymen since before 15
Noah was a sailor.

_Fab._ She did show favour to the youth in your sight
only to exasperate you, to awake your dormouse valour, to
put fire in your heart, and brimstone in your liver. You
should then have accosted her; and with some excellent 20
jests, fire-new from the mint, you should have banged the
youth into dumbness. This was looked for at your hand,
and this was balked: the double gilt of this opportunity you
let time wash off, and you are now sailed into the north
of my lady's opinion; where you will hang like an icicle 25
on a Dutchman's beard, unless you do redeem it by some
laudable attempt either of valour or policy.

_Sir And._ An't be any way, it must be with valour; for
policy I hate: I had as lief be a Brownist as a politician.

_Sir To._ Why, then, build me thy fortunes upon the 30
basis of valour. Challenge me the count's youth to fight
with him; hurt him in eleven places: my niece shall take
note of it; and assure thyself, there is no love-broker in
the world can more prevail in man's commendation with
woman than report of valour. 35

_Fab._ There is no way but this, Sir Andrew.

_Sir And._ Will either of you bear me a challenge to
him?

_Sir To._ Go, write it in a martial hand; be curst and
brief; it is no matter how witty, so it be eloquent and full 40
of invention: taunt him with the license of ink: if thou
thou'st him some thrice, it shall not be amiss; and as
many lies as will lie in thy sheet of paper, although the
sheet were big enough for the bed of Ware in England, set
'em down: go, about it. Let there be gall enough in thy 45
ink, though thou write with a goose-pen, no matter:
about it.

_Sir And._ Where shall I find you?

_Sir To._ We'll call thee at the cubiculo: go.
[_Exit Sir Andrew._

_Fab._ This is a dear manakin to you, Sir Toby. 50

_Sir To._ I have been dear to him, lad, some two thousand
strong, or so.

_Fab._ We shall have a rare letter from him: but you'll
not deliver't?

_Sir To._ Never trust me, then; and by all means stir 55
on the youth to an answer. I think oxen and wainropes
cannot hale them together. For Andrew, if he were opened,
and you find so much blood in his liver as will clog the
foot of a flea, I'll eat the rest of the anatomy.

_Fab._ And his opposite, the youth, bears in his visage 60
no great presage of cruelty.

_Enter_ MARIA.

_Sir To._ Look, where the youngest wren of nine comes.

_Mar._ If you desire the spleen, and will laugh yourselves
into stitches, follow me. Yond gull Malvolio is
turned heathen, a very renegado; for there is no Christian, 65
that means to be saved by believing rightly, can ever believe
such impossible passages of grossness. He's in yellow
stockings.

_Sir To._ And cross-gartered?

_Mar._ Most villanously; like a pedant that keeps a 70
school i' the church. I have dogged him, like his murderer.
He does obey every point of the letter that I dropped to
betray him: he does smile his face into more lines than is
in the new map with the augmentation of the Indies: you
have not seen such a thing as 'tis. I can hardly forbear 75
hurling things at him. I know my lady will strike him: if
she do, he'll smile and take't for a great favour.

_Sir To._ Come, bring us, bring us where he is. [_Exeunt._

LINENOTES:

SCENE II.] SCENE IV. Pope.

OLIVIA'S house.] Rowe.

[5, 31] _count's_] _Duke's_ Rowe.

[5] _upon_] _on_ Rowe (ed. 2).

[7] _thee the_] F3 F4. _the_ F1 F2. _you the_ Long MS.

[12] _'Slight_] F3 F4. _S'light_ F1 F2.

[13] _I will_] F1. _I_ F2 F3 F4.

[27] _laudable_] om. Rowe.

[28] _An't_] Hanmer. _And't_ Ff.

[31] _youth to fight_] _youth; go, fight_ Tyrwhitt conj.

[32] _with him_] _with you_ Ritson conj.

[35] _woman_] _women_ Hanmer.

[39] _curst_] _curt_ Grey conj.

[45] _go, about_] Capell. _go about_ Ff. _and go about_ Rowe.

[46] _write_] _write it_ Rowe.

[49] _the_] _thy_ Hanmer.

[50] SCENE V. Pope.

[57] _Andrew_] _Sir Andrew_ Collier (Collier MS.).

[58] _and_] _an_ S. Walker conj.

[62] _nine_] Theobald, _mine_ Ff.

[64] _yond_] _yon'_ Capell.

[65] _heathen_] _a heathen_ S. Walker conj.

_renegado_] Rowe. _Renegatho_ Ff.

[73] _is_] Ff. _are_ Steevens.

[78] [Exeunt.] Exeunt Omnes Ff.

SCENE III. _A street._

_Enter_ SEBASTIAN _and_ ANTONIO.

_Seb._ I would not by my will have troubled you;
But, since you make your pleasure of your pains,
I will no further chide you.

_Ant._ I could not stay behind you: my desire,
More sharp than filed steel, did spur me forth; 5
And not all love to see you, though so much
As might have drawn one to a longer voyage,
But jealousy what might befall your travel,
Being skilless in these parts; which to a stranger,
Unguided and unfriended, often prove 10
Rough and unhospitable: my willing love,
The rather by these arguments of fear,
Set forth in your pursuit.

_Seb._ My kind Antonio,
I can no other answer make but thanks,
And thanks; and ever ... oft good turns 15
Are shuffled off with such uncurrent pay:
But, were my worth as is my conscience firm,
You should find better dealing. What's to do?
Shall we go see the reliques of this town?

_Ant._ To-morrow, sir: best first go see your lodging. 20

_Seb._ I am not weary, and 'tis long to night:
I pray you, let us satisfy our eyes
With the memorials and the things of fame
That do renown this city.

_Ant._ Would you'ld pardon me;
I do not without danger walk these streets: 25
Once, in a sea-fight, 'gainst the count his galleys
I did some service; of such note indeed,
That were I ta'en here it would scarce be answer'd.

_Seb._ Belike you slew great number of his people.

_Ant._ The offence is not of such a bloody nature; 30
Albeit the quality of the time and quarrel
Might well have given us bloody argument.
It might have since been answer'd in repaying
What we took from them; which, for traffic's sake,
Most of our city did: only myself stood out; 35
For which, if I be lapsed in this place,
I shall pay dear.

_Seb._ Do not then walk too open.

_Ant._ It doth not fit me. Hold, sir, here's my purse.
In the south suburbs, at the Elephant,
Is best to lodge: I will bespeak our diet, 40
Whiles you beguile the time and feed your knowledge
With viewing of the town: there shall you have me.

_Seb._ Why I your purse?

_Ant._ Haply your eye shall light upon some toy
You have desire to purchase; and your store, 45
I think, is not for idle markets, sir.

_Seb._ I'll be your purse-bearer and leave you
For an hour.

_Ant._ To the Elephant.

_Seb._ I do remember. [_Exeunt._

LINENOTES:

SCENE III.] SCENE VI. Pope.

A street.] Capell. The street. Rowe.

[7] _one_] _me_ Heath conj.

[15, 16] _And thanks ... pay_] Omitted in F2 F3 F4.

[15] _And thanks; and ever ... oft good turns_] _And thankes: and ever
oft good turnes_ F1. _And thanks: and ever oft-good turns_ Pope (ed.
1). _And thanks: and ever-oft good turns_ Id. (ed. 2). _And thanks,
and ever thanks; and oft good turns_ Theobald. _And thanks, and ever;
oft good turns_ Steevens (1778). _And thanks again and ever; oft good
turns_ Rann (Tollet conj.). _And thanks, and ever thanks: oft good
turns_ Malone. _And thanks, and ever thanks: often good turns_
Steevens (1794). _And thanks, and ever thanks; too oft good turns_
Seymour conj. _And thanks, still thanks; and very oft good turns_
Collier (Collier MS.). _And thanks, and ever thanks; though oft good
turns_ Lettsom conj. _And thanks: and very oft good turns_ Grant
White. _And thanks, and thanks; and very oft good turns_ Id. conj.

[17] _worth_] _wealth_ Collier MS.

[20] _lodging_] _lodging?_ F1.

[26] _count his_] _Duke his_ Rowe. _County's_ Malone conj.

[29] _people._] _people?_ Dyce.

[36] _lapsed_] _latched_ Hunter conj.

[47, 48] _you For an_] Ff. _you for An_ Theobald. As prose in Boswell.

[48] Exeunt.] Ff. Exeunt severally. Capell.

SCENE IV. OLIVIA'S _garden_.

_Enter_ OLIVIA _and_ MARIA.

_Oli._ I have sent after him: he says he'll come;
How shall I feast him? what bestow of him?
For youth is bought more oft than begg'd or borrow'd.
I speak too loud.
Where is Malvolio? he is sad and civil, 5
And suits well for a servant with my fortunes:
Where is Malvolio?

_Mar._ He's coming, madam; but in very strange manner.
He is, sure, possessed, madam.

_Oli._ Why, what's the matter? does he rave? 10

_Mar._ No, madam, he does nothing but smile: your
ladyship were best to have some guard about you, if he
come; for, sure, the man is tainted in's wits.

_Oli._ Go call him hither. [_Exit Maria._] I am as mad as he,
If sad and merry madness equal be. 15

_Re-enter_ MARIA, _with_ MALVOLIO.

How now, Malvolio!

_Mal._ Sweet lady, ho, ho.

_Oli._ Smilest thou?
I sent for thee upon a sad occasion.

_Mal._ Sad, lady! I could be sad: this does make some 20
obstruction in the blood, this cross-gartering; but what of
that? if it please the eye of one, it is with me as the very
true sonnet is, 'Please one, and please all.'

_Oli._ Why, how dost thou, man? what is the matter
with thee? 25

_Mal._ Not black in my mind, though yellow in my legs.
It did come to his hands, and commands shall be executed:
I think we do know the sweet Roman hand.

_Oli._ Wilt thou go to bed, Malvolio?

_Mal._ To bed! ay, sweet-heart, and I'll come to thee. 30

_Oli._ God comfort thee! Why dost thou smile so and
kiss thy hand so oft?

_Mar._ How do you, Malvolio?

_Mal._ At your request! yes; nightingales answer daws.

_Mar._ Why appear you with this ridiculous boldness 35
before my lady?

_Mal._'Be not afraid of greatness:' 'twas well writ.

_Oli._ What meanest thou by that, Malvolio?

_Mal._ 'Some are born great,'--

_Oli._ Ha! 40

_Mal._ 'Some achieve greatness,'--

_Oli._ What sayest thou?

_Mal._ 'And some have greatness thrust upon them.'

_Oli._ Heaven restore thee!

_Mal._ 'Remember who commended thy yellow stockings,'-- 45

_Oli._ Thy yellow stockings!

_Mal._ 'And wished to see thee cross-gartered.'

_Oli._ Cross-gartered!

_Mal._ 'Go to, thou art made, if thou desirest to be so;'-- 50

_Oli._ Am I made?

_Mal._ 'If not, let me see thee a servant still.'

_Oli._ Why, this is very midsummer madness.

_Enter_ Servant.

_Ser._ Madam, the young gentleman of the Count Orsino's
is returned: I could hardly entreat him back: he 55
attends your ladyship's pleasure.

_Oli._ I'll come to him. [_Exit Servant._] Good Maria,
let this fellow be looked to. Where's my cousin Toby?
Let some of my people have a special care of him: I would
not have him miscarry for the half of my dowry. 60
[_Exeunt Olivia and Maria._

_Mal._ O, ho! do you come near me now? no worse man
than Sir Toby to look to me! This concurs directly with
the letter: she sends him on purpose, that I may appear
stubborn to him; for she incites me to that in the letter.
'Cast thy humble slough,' says she; 'be opposite with a 65
kinsman, surly with servants; let thy tongue tang with arguments
of state; put thyself into the trick of singularity;'
and consequently sets down the manner how; as, a sad face,
a reverend carriage, a slow tongue, in the habit of some sir
of note, and so forth. I have limed her; but it is Jove's 70
doing, and Jove make me thankful! And when she went
away now, 'Let this fellow be looked to:' fellow! not Malvolio,
nor after my degree, but fellow. Why, every thing
adheres together, that no dram of a scruple, no scruple of a
scruple, no obstacle, no incredulous or unsafe circumstance--What 75
can be said? Nothing that can be can come between
me and the full prospect of my hopes. Well, Jove,
not I, is the doer of this, and he is to be thanked.

_Re-enter_ MARIA, _with_ SIR TOBY _and_ FABIAN.

_Sir To._ Which way is he, in the name of sanctity? If
all the devils of hell be drawn in little, and Legion himself 80
possessed him, yet I'll speak to him.

_Fab._ Here he is, here he is. How is't with you, sir?
how is't with you, man?

_Mal._ Go off; I discard you: let me enjoy my private:
go off. 85

_Mar._ Lo, how hollow the fiend speaks within him! did
not I tell you? Sir Toby, my lady prays you to have a
care of him.

_Mal._ Ah, ha! does she so?

_Sir To._ Go to, go to; peace, peace; we must deal 90
gently with him: let me alone. How do you, Malvolio?
how is't with you? What, man! defy the devil; consider,
he's an enemy to mankind.

_Mal._ Do you know what you say?

_Mar._ La you, an you speak ill of the devil, how he 95
takes it at heart! Pray God, he be not bewitched!

_Fab._ Carry his water to the wise woman.

_Mar._ Marry, and it shall be done to-morrow morning,
if I live. My lady would not lose him for more than I'll
say. 100

_Mal._ How now, mistress!

_Mar._ O Lord!

_Sir To._ Prithee, hold thy peace; this is not the way:
do you not see you move him? let me alone with him.

_Fab._ No way but gentleness; gently, gently: the fiend 105
is rough, and will not be roughly used.

_Sir To._ Why, how now, my bawcock! how dost thou,
chuck?

_Mal._ Sir!

_Sir To._ Ay, Biddy, come with me. What, man! 'tis 110
not for gravity to play at cherry-pit with Satan: hang him,
foul collier!

_Mar._ Get him to say his prayers, good Sir Toby, get
him to pray.

_Mal._ My prayers, minx! 115

_Mar._ No, I warrant you, he will not hear of godliness.

_Mal._ Go, hang yourselves all! you are idle shallow
things: I am not of your element: you shall know more
hereafter. [_Exit._

_Sir To._ Is't possible? 120

_Fab._ If this were played upon a stage now, I could
condemn it as an improbable fiction.

_Sir To._ His very genius hath taken the infection of
the device, man.

_Mar._ Nay, pursue him now, lest the device take air 125
and taint.

_Fab._ Why, we shall make him mad indeed.

_Mar._ The house will be the quieter.

_Sir To._ Come, we'll have him in a dark room and
bound. My niece is already in the belief that he's mad: 130
we may carry it thus, for our pleasure and his penance, till
our very pastime, tired out of breath, prompt us to have
mercy on him: at which time we will bring the device to
the bar and crown thee for a finder of madmen. But see,
but see. 135

_Enter_ SIR ANDREW.

_Fab._ More matter for a May morning.

_Sir And._ Here's the challenge, read it: I warrant
there's vinegar and pepper in't.

_Fab._ Is't so saucy?

_Sir And._ Ay, is't, I warrant him: do but read. 140

_Sir To._ Give me. [_Reads_] Youth, whatsoever thou art,
thou art but a scurvy fellow.

_Fab._ Good, and valiant.

_Sir To._ [_reads_] Wonder not, nor admire not in thy mind, why
I do call thee so, for I will show thee no reason for't. 145

_Fab._ A good note; that keeps you from the blow of
the law.

_Sir To._ [_reads_] Thou comest to the lady Olivia, and in my
sight she uses thee kindly: but thou liest in thy throat; that is not the
matter I challenge thee for. 150

_Fab._ Very brief, and to exceeding good sense--less.

_Sir To._ [_reads_] I will waylay thee going home; where if it be
thy chance to kill me,--

_Fab._ Good.

_Sir To._ [_reads_] Thou killest me like a rogue and a villain. 155

_Fab._ Still you keep o' the windy side of the law:
good.

_Sir To._ [_reads_] Fare thee well; and God have mercy upon one
of our souls! He may have mercy upon mine; but my hope is better,
and so look to thyself. Thy friend, as thou usest him, and thy sworn 160
enemy,

ANDREW AGUECHEEK.

If this letter move him not, his legs cannot: I'll give't
him.

_Mar._ You may have very fit occasion for't: he is
now in some commerce with my lady, and will by and by 165
depart.

_Sir To._ Go, Sir Andrew; scout me for him at the corner
of the orchard like a bum-baily: so soon as ever thou
seest him, draw; and, as thou drawest, swear horrible; for
it comes to pass oft that a terrible oath, with a swaggering 170
accent sharply twanged off, gives manhood more approbation
than ever proof itself would have earned him.
Away!

_Sir And._ Nay, let me alone for swearing. [_Exit._

_Sir To._ Now will not I deliver his letter: for the behaviour 175
of the young gentleman gives him out to be of
good capacity and breeding; his employment between his
lord and my niece confirms no less: therefore this letter,
being so excellently ignorant, will breed no terror in the
youth: he will find it comes from a clodpole. But, sir, I will 180
deliver his challenge by word of mouth; set upon Aguecheek
a notable report of valour; and drive the gentleman,
as I know his youth will aptly receive it, into a most
hideous opinion of his rage, skill, fury and impetuosity.
This will so fright them both, that they will kill one another 185
by the look, like cockatrices.

_Re-enter_ OLIVIA, _with_ VIOLA.

_Fab._ Here he comes with your niece: give them way
till he take leave, and presently after him.

_Sir To._ I will meditate the while upon some horrid
message for a challenge. 190
[_Exeunt Sir Toby, Fabian, and Maria._

_Oli._ I have said too much unto a heart of stone
And laid mine honour too unchary out:
There's something in me that reproves my fault;
But such a headstrong potent fault it is,
That it but mocks reproof. 195

_Vio._ With the same 'haviour that your passion bears
Goes on my master's grief.

_Oli._ Here, wear this jewel for me, 'tis my picture;
Refuse it not; it hath no tongue to vex you;
And I beseech you come again to-morrow. 200
What shall you ask of me that I'll deny,
That honour saved may upon asking give?

_Vio._ Nothing but this;--your true love for my master.

_Oli._ How with mine honour may I give him that
Which I have given to you?

_Vio._ I will acquit you. 205

_Oli._ Well, come again to-morrow: fare thee well:
A fiend like thee might bear my soul to hell. [_Exit._

_Re-enter_ SIR TOBY _and_ FABIAN.

_Sir To._ Gentleman, God save thee.

_Vio._ And you, sir.

_Sir To._ That defence thou hast, betake thee to't: of 210
what nature the wrongs are thou hast done him, I know
not; but thy intercepter, full of despite, bloody as the
hunter, attends thee at the orchard-end: dismount thy tuck,
be yare in thy preparation, for thy assailant is quick, skilful
and deadly. 215

_Vio._ You mistake, sir; I am sure no man hath any
quarrel to me: my remembrance is very free and clear
from any image of offence done to any man.

_Sir To._ You'll find it otherwise, I assure you: therefore,
if you hold your life at any price, betake you to your 220
guard; for your opposite hath in him what youth, strength,
skill and wrath can furnish man withal.

_Vio._ I pray you, sir, what is he?

_Sir To._ He is knight, dubbed with unhatched rapier
and on carpet consideration; but he is a devil in private 225
brawl: souls and bodies hath he divorced three; and his incensement
at this moment is so implacable, that satisfaction
can be none but by pangs of death and sepulchre. Hob,
nob, is his word; give't or take't.

_Vio._ I will return again into the house and desire some 230
conduct of the lady. I am no fighter. I have heard of
some kind of men that put quarrels purposely on others, to
taste their valour: belike this is a man of that quirk.

_Sir To._ Sir, no; his indignation derives itself out of a
very competent injury: therefore, get you on and give him 235
his desire. Back you shall not to the house, unless you undertake
that with me which with as much safety you might
answer him: therefore, on, or strip your sword stark naked;
for meddle you must, that's certain, or forswear to wear iron
about you. 240

_Vio._ This is as uncivil as strange. I beseech you, do
me this courteous office, as to know of the knight what my
offence to him is: it is something of my negligence, nothing
of my purpose.

_Sir To._ I will do so. Signior Fabian, stay you by this 245
gentleman till my return. [_Exit._

_Vio._ Pray you, sir, do you know of this matter?

_Fab._ I know the knight is incensed against you, even
to a mortal arbitrement; but nothing of the circumstance
more. 250

_Vio._ I beseech you, what manner of man is he?

_Fab._ Nothing of that wonderful promise, to read him
by his form, as you are like to find him in the proof of his
valour. He is, indeed, sir, the most skilful, bloody and
fatal opposite that you could possibly have found in any 255
part of Illyria. Will you walk towards him? I will make
your peace with him if I can.

_Vio._ I shall be much bound to you for't: I am one
that had rather go with sir priest than sir knight: I care not
who knows so much of my mettle. [_Exeunt._ 260

_Re-enter_ SIR TOBY, _with_ SIR ANDREW.

_Sir To._ Why, man, he's a very devil; I have not seen
such a firago. I had a pass with him, rapier, scabbard and
all, and he gives me the stuck in with such a mortal motion,
that it is inevitable; and on the answer, he pays you as
surely as your feet hit the ground they step on. They say 265
he has been fencer to the Sophy.

_Sir And._ Pox on't, I'll not meddle with him.

_Sir To._ Ay, but he will not now be pacified: Fabian
can scarce hold him yonder.

_Sir And._ Plague on't, an I thought he had been valiant 270
and so cunning in fence, I'ld have seen him damned
ere I'ld have challenged him. Let him let the matter slip,
and I'll give him my horse, grey Capilet.

_Sir To._ I'll make the motion: stand here, make a good
show on't: this shall end without the perdition of souls. 275
[_Aside_] Marry, I'll ride your horse as well as I ride you.

_Re-enter_ FABIAN _and_ VIOLA.

[_To Fab._] I have his horse to take up the quarrel: I have
persuaded him the youth's a devil.

_Fab._ He is as horribly conceited of him; and pants and
looks pale, as if a bear were at his heels. 280

_Sir To._ [_To Vio._] There's no remedy, sir; he will fight
with you for's oath sake: marry, he hath better bethought
him of his quarrel, and he finds that now scarce to be worth
talking of: therefore draw, for the supportance of his vow;
he protests he will not hurt you. 285

_Vio._ [_Aside_] Pray God defend me! A little thing
would make me tell them how much I lack of a man.

_Fab._ Give ground, if you see him furious.

_Sir To._ Come, Sir Andrew, there's no remedy; the
gentleman will, for his honour's sake, have one bout with 290
you; he cannot by the duello avoid it: but he has promised
me, as he is a gentleman and a soldier, he will not hurt you.
Come on; to't.

_Sir And._ Pray God, he keep his oath!

_Vio._ I do assure you, 'tis against my will. [_They draw._ 295

_Enter_ ANTONIO.

_Ant._ Put up your sword. If this young gentleman
Have done offence, I take the fault on me:
If you offend him, I for him defy you.

_Sir To._ You, sir! why, what are you?

_Ant._ One, sir, that for his love dares yet do more 300
Than you have heard him brag to you he will.

_Sir To._ Nay, if you be an undertaker, I am for you.
[_They draw._

_Enter_ Officers.

_Fab._ O good Sir Toby, hold! here come the officers.

_Sir To._ I'll be with you anon.

_Vio._ Pray, sir, put your sword up, if you please. 305

_Sir And._ Marry, will I, sir; and, for that I promised
you, I 'll be as good as my word: he will bear you easily
and reins well.

_First Off._ This is the man; do thy office.

_Sec. Off._ Antonio, I arrest thee at the suit of Count Orsino. 310

_Ant._ You do mistake me, sir.

_First Off._ No, sir, no jot; I know your favour well,
Though now you have no sea-cap on your head.
Take him away: he knows I know him well. 315

_Ant._ I must obey. [_To Vio._] This comes with seeking you:
But there's no remedy; I shall answer it.
What will you do, now my necessity
Makes me to ask you for my purse? It grieves me
Much more for what I cannot do for you 320
Than what befalls myself. You stand amazed;
But be of comfort.

_Sec. Off._ Come, sir, away.

_Ant._ I must entreat of you some of that money.

_Vio._ What money, sir? 325
For the fair kindness you have show'd me here,
And, part, being prompted by your present trouble,
Out of my lean and low ability
I'll lend you something: my having is not much;
I'll make division of my present with you: 330
Hold, there's half my coffer.

_Ant._ Will you deny me now?
Is't possible that my deserts to you
Can lack persuasion? Do not tempt my misery,
Lest that it make me so unsound a man
As to upbraid you with those kindnesses 335
That I have done for you.

_Vio._ I know of none;
Nor know I you by voice or any feature:
I hate ingratitude more in a man
Than lying, vainness, babbling, drunkenness,
Or any taint of vice whose strong corruption 340
Inhabits our frail blood.

_Ant._ O heavens themselves!

_Sec. Off._ Come, sir, I pray you, go.

_Ant._ Let me speak a little. This youth that you see here
I snatch'd one half out of the jaws of death;
Relieved him with such sanctity of love; 345
And to his image, which methought did promise
Most venerable worth, did I devotion.

_First Off._ What's that to us? The time goes by: away!

_Ant._ But O how vile an idol proves this god!
Thou hast, Sebastian, done good feature shame. 350
In nature there's no blemish but the mind;
None can be call'd deform'd but the unkind:
Virtue is beauty; but the beauteous evil
Are empty trunks, o'erflourish'd by the devil.

_First Off._ The man grows mad: away with him! Come, come, sir. 355

_Ant._ Lead me on. [_Exit with Officers._

_Vio._ Methinks his words do from such passion fly,
That he believes himself: so do not I.
Prove true, imagination, O, prove true,
That I, dear brother, be now ta'en for you! 360

_Sir To._ Come hither, knight; come hither, Fabian:
we'll whisper o'er a couplet or two of most sage saws.

_Vio._ He named Sebastian: I my brother know
Yet living in my glass; even such and so
In favour was my brother, and he went 365
Still in this fashion, colour, ornament,
For him I imitate: O, if it prove,
Tempests are kind and salt waves fresh in love! [_Exit._

_Sir To._ A very dishonest paltry boy, and more a coward
than a hare: his dishonesty appears in leaving his friend 370
here in necessity and denying him; and for his cowardship,
ask Fabian.

_Fab._ A coward, a most devout coward, religious in it.

_Sir And._ 'Slid, I'll after him again and beat him.

_Sir To._ Do; cuff him soundly, but never draw thy 375
sword.

_Sir And._ An I do not,-- [_Exit._

_Fab._ Come, let's see the event.

_Sir To._ I dare lay any money 'twill be nothing yet.
[_Exeunt._

LINENOTES:

SCENE IV.] SCENE VII. Pope.

OLIVIA'S garden.] Capell. Olivia's house. Rowe.

[1] _he says he'll_] _say, he will_ Theobald.

[2, 3] _bestow of him? For youth is ... borrow'd_] _bestow? for youth
Is ... borrow'd of_ Badham conj.

[2] _of_] _on_ Pope.

[4,5] _I speak ... civil_] Printed as in Pope; as one line in Ff.

[5] _Where is_] Pope. _Where's_ Ff.

[7-10] _Where is ... rave?_] As prose in Pope; as three lines in Ff,
ending _madam ... madam ... rave?_ As three lines in Hanmer, ending
_madam ... possest ... rave?_

[8] _He's_] _He is_ Hanmer.

_very_] om. Hanmer.

[11] _nothing_] _nothing else_ Hanmer, who reads lines 11-14 as four
verses, ending _smile; ... guard ... man ... hither._

[13] _in 's_] _in his_ Hanmer.

[14] [Exit M.] Dyce.

_I am_] _I'm_ Pope.

[15] _merry_] _mercy_ F2.

Re-enter M. with Malvolio.] Dyce. Enter Malvolio. Ff (after _hither_,
line 14).

[16] _How_] Ol. _How_ F2.

[17] _ho, ho_] F1. _ha, ha_ F2 F3 F4. om. Capell, reading _How now ...
thou?_ as one line.

[Smiles fantastically. Rowe (smile. ed. I.)

[18, 19] _Smilest ... occasion_] As one line in Ff.

[20-25] _Sad ... thee?_] Printed as seven lines in Ff, ending _sad ...
blood ... that? ... true ... all ... man ... thee?_

[23] _is_] _it_ F2. _has it_ Capell.

[24] Oli.] Mal. F1.

[28] _the sweet_] _that sweet_ Rowe (ed. 2).

[38] _meanest_] _meanst_ F1.

[47] _Thy_] _My_ Lettsom conj.

[53] _very_] _a very_ Rann.

[54] _Count_] _Duke_ Rowe.

[57] [Exit Servant.] Capell.

[58] _cousin_] _uncle_ Rowe (ed. 2).

[60] [Exeunt O. and M.] Capell. Exit. Ff.

[61] SCENE VIII. Pope.

[66] _tang with_] _langer with_ F1. _tang_ Capell.

[70] _Jove's_] _God's_ Halliwell. _Love's_ Grant White conj.

[71] _Jove_] _God_ Halliwell. _Love_ Grant White conj.

[78] Re-enter....] Capell. Enter T., F., and M. Ff.

[79] SCENE IX. Pope.

_sanctity_] _sanity_ S. Walker conj.

[82] _How is't_] Sir To. _How is't_ Anon. conj.

[84] _private_] _privacy_ Rowe.

[91] _me_] _him_ Rowe.

_do you_] _do you do_ F4.

[95] _an_] Capell. _and_ Ff. _if_ Pope.

[103] _this_] _that_ F4.

[104] _let me alone with him_] Omitted in F3 F4.

[107] _bawcock_] F1 F2. _havock_ F3 F4.

[110] _Ay, Biddy, come with me._] See note (XI).

[116] Mar.] Fab. Anon. conj.

[125] _lest_] F4. _least_ F1 F2 F3.

[128] _will_] _well_ F2.

[136] SCENE X. Pope.

[140] _Ay, is't_] Collier. _I, is't?_ F1 F2. _I, is't?_ F3 F4. _Ay, is
it,_ Boswell.

[141] [Reads.] Rowe.

[146] _good_] _very good_ Rowe (ed 1).

[151] _to_] om. Rowe.

_sense--less_] _sence-lesse_ F1 F2. _sense-lesse_ F3. _sense-less_ F4.
_senseless_ Capell.

[159] _mine_] _thine_ Johnson conj.

[162] _If_] To. _If_ Ff.

[168] _bum-baily_] _bum-bailiff_ Theobald.

[169] _horrible_] F1. _horribly_ F2 F3 F4.

[180] _it comes_] F1 F2. _that it comes_ F3 F4.

[186] Re-enter O. and V.] Collier (after line 184). Enter O. and V.
Ff.

[187] SCENE XL Pope.

[190] [Exeunt Sir T., F. and M.] Capell. Exeunt. F2 F3 F4. om. F1.

[191] _I have_] _I've_ Pope.

[192] _out_] Theobald. _on't_ Ff.

[196, 197] _'haviour that your ... Goes ... grief_] _'haviour Your ...
goes ... grief_ Capell conj.

[197] _Goes ... grief_] Rowe. _Goes ... greefes_ F1 F2. _Goes ...
griefs_ F3 F4. _Go ... griefs_ Malone.

[202] _That honour saved_] _That honour (sav'd)_ F1 F2. _That (honour
sav'd)_ F3 F4.

[208] SCENE XII. Pope.

[212] _intercepter_] _interpreter_ Warburton.

[216] _sir; I am sure_] Theobald. _sir I am sure,_ F1 F2. _sir, I am
sure,_ F3 F4. _sir, I am sure_ Rowe.

[222] _man_] _a man_ F3 F4.

[224] _knight_] _a knight_ Collier MS.

_unhatched_] _unhack'd_ Pope. _an hatcht_ Malone conj.

[229] _nob_] _nod_ Rowe (ed. 2).

[234] _Sir, no_] _No, sir, no_ Hanmer.

_derives_] _drives_ F4.

[235] _competent_] F4. _computent_ F1 F2 F3.

[238] _him:_] F1 F3 F4. _him?_ F2. _to him;_ Hanmer.

_or_] _and_ Hanmer.

_your sword_] _you of sword_ Anon. conj.

[241] _as uncivil_] _an uncivil_ Capell (corrected in MS.).

[242] _as to know_] _to know_ Capell.

[260] [Exeunt.] om. Capell. See note (XII).

Re-enter....] Capell. Enter Toby and Andrew. Ff. Re-enter Sir T. with
Sir A. hanging back. Collier (Collier MS.).

[261] SCENE XIII. Pope. SCENE V. Dyce and Staunton.

[262] _firago_] _virago_ Rowe.

[263] _stuck in_] _stuck--in_ Johnson. _stuck-in_, Capell. _stuckin_
Singer.

[264] _you_] _your_ F2.

[265] _hit_] Rowe. _hits_ Ff.

[269] _yonder_] om. Rowe.

[270] _an_] Theobald. _and_ Ff. _if_ Pope.

[273] _Capilet_] _Capulet_ Dyce.

[276] [_Aside_] Theobald.

Re-enter F. and V.] Enter F. and V. Ff. om. Capell. Enter F. and V.
unwillingly. Collier MS.

[277] [To Fab.] Rowe.

_take up_] _make up_ Anon. conj.

[281] [To Vio.] Capell.

[282] _oath sake_] _oath's sake_ Capell.

[283] _scarce to be_] _to be scarce_ Capell conj.

[286] [Aside] Capell.

[295] SCENE XIV. Pope.

[They draw.] Rowe. They go back from each other. Collier (Collier
MS.).

Enter A.] Ff (after line 294). Enter A.; draws, and runs between.
Capell.

[298] [Drawing. Rowe.

[302] [They draw.] Edd. Draws. Rowe.

Enter Officers.] Enter two Officers. Capell. Enter Officers. Dyce and
Staunton (after line 308).

[304] [To Antonio. Capell.

[305] [To Sir Andrew. Rowe.

[310-312] As two lines in Capell, ending _suit ... sir._

[310] _Count_] _Duke_ Rowe.

[316] [To Vio.] Collier.

[318, 319] _do, now ... purse?_] Dyce and Staunton. _do: now ...
purse._ F1. _doe? now ... purse._ F2 F3 F4.

[324] _money_] _money back_ Capell, reading 323-325 as two lines,
ending _you ... sir?_

[331] _Hold, there's_] _Hold, There's_ S. Walker conj.

_there's_] _there is_ Hanmer.

_now?_] F3 F4. _now,_ F1 F2.

[334] _Lest_] F4. _Least_ F1 F2 F3.

[339] _lying, vainness, babbling, drunkenness_] Steevens (1793).
_lying, vainnesse, babling drunkennesse_ Ff. _lying vainness, babbling
drunkenness_ Rowe (ed. 2).

[342] _pray you, go_] _pray, go_ S. Walker conj., ending the line at
_little_. _pray you_ Lloyd conj.

[343] _speak_] _but speak_ Hanmer.

_This youth_] _Why, this youth_ Hanmer, ending lines 342, 343 at
_speak ... here_.

[345] _love;_] Ff. _love,--_ Capell. After this S. Walker supposes a
line to be lost.

[346] _his_] _this_ S. Walker conj.

[347] _venerable_] _veritable_ Collier (Collier MS.).

[349] _vile_] Pope. _vilde_ F1 F2 F3. _vild_ F4.

[353] _beauteous evil_] _beauteous-evil_ Malone.

[355] _The man_] _Surely the man_ Hanmer.

_Come_] 2. Off. _Come_ Capell. This word begins a line in Ff.

[356] with Officers.] Theobald. om. Ff.

[362] _we'll_] _Weel_ F1. _Well_ F2 F3 F4.

[367] _O, if_] _so if_ Becket conj.

[368] [Exit.] F2 F3 F4. om. F1.

[373] _a most_] om. Hanmer.

[374] _'Slid_] _Od's lid_ Hanmer.

[375] _never_] _ne'er_ Hanmer.

[377] _An_] _Theobald_. _And_ Ff. _If_ Pope.

_not,--_] Theobald. _not._ Ff.

[378] _let's_] _let us_ Hanmer.

[379] _any_] om. Hanmer.

[Exeunt.] Rowe. [Exit. Ff.