Chapter LIII: A Jest Concerning Calvus

I laughed at one 'mid Forum-crowd unknown
Who, when Vatinius' crimes in wondrous way
Had by my Calvus been explained, exposed,
His hand upraising high admiring cried
"Great Gods! the loquent little Doodle-diddle!" 5

I laughed at I know not whom in the crowded court who, when with admirable art Vatinius' crimes my Calvus had set forth, with hands uplifted and admiring mien thus quoth "Great Gods, the fluent little Larydoodle!"

LIIII.

Othonis caput oppidost pusillum
* * * *
Neri rustica semilauta crura,
Subtile et leve peditum Libonis.
* * * *
Si non omnia displicere vellem
Tibi et Fuficio seni recocte 5

LIIIIb.

Irascere iterum meis iambis
Inmerentibus, unice imperator.

LIIII.

TO JULIUS CÆSAR. (?)

The head of Otho, puniest of pates
* * * *
The rustic half-washt shanks of Nerius
And Libo's subtle silent fizzling-farts.
* * * *
I wish that leastwise these should breed disgust
In thee and old Fuficius, rogue twice-cookt. 5

LIIIIb.

Again at these mine innocent iamb-lines
Wi' wrath be wrothest; unique Emperor!

Otho's head is paltry past all phrase * * * the uncouth semi-soaped shanks of Nerius, the slender soundless fizzlings of Libo * * * if not all things I wish would displease thee and Fuficius, the white-headed and green-tailed.

Anew thou shalt be enraged at my harmless iambics, emperor unique.