Chapter I: Preface

In preparing for the press "THE LIFE AND BEAUTIES OF FANNY FERN," we have given to the reader a statement of the most prominent incidents in her eventful career, which is authenticated, not only by the testimony of her nearest relatives, but by communications from her own lips. The lives of distinguished men or women have always been accounted public property, and, in narrating that of Fanny Fern, we have confined ourselves to simple facts, leaving the fancy-pictures to be filled up by others.

In giving selections from her "Beauties," we present the reader with a bouquet of "Ferns," all freshly gathered. In so doing, we have infringed on no one's copy-right; the sketches having been copied, in every instance, from the papers to which they were originally contributed. A large proportion of them have never before appeared within the covers of a book. These latter are the very articles upon which Fanny made her reputation. We have given quotations which do justice to every variety of her versatile style. One page flashes with the keen edge of satire, another brims over with mirth, and a third is tearful with pathos.

We have shown Fanny at home, on the street, and in church, and have thus furnished a key which will unlock many of the mysteries of "Ruth Hall," and "Fern Leaves."

CONTENTS.

I.
GENIUS IN PANTALETTES. 11

II.
FANNY AT SCHOOL. 13

III.
THE NEW NAME. 18

IV.
THE HUSBAND'S DEATH. 20

V.
THE SECOND MARRIAGE. 27

VI.
FANNY FERN AT HOME. 31

VII.
EARLY LITERARY EFFORTS. 37

VIII.
FANNY AND THE TRUE FLAG. 39

IX.
FANNY FERN IN CHURCH. 48

X.
FANNY FERN IN BROADWAY. 52

XI.
FANNY AT THE TREMONT HOUSE. 55

XII.
A KEY TO "RUTH HALL." 60

XIII.
A WORD ABOUT N. P. WILLIS. 69

XIV.
IDEAS ABOUT BABIES. 72

XV.
PRAISE FROM A WOMAN. 79

XVI.
THE REMARKABLE HISTORY OF JEMMY JESSAMY. 81

XVII.
JEMMY JESSAMY'S DEFENCE. 85

XVIII.
THE GOVERNESS. 88

XIX.
ALL ABOUT SATAN. 103

XX.
WELL KNOWN CHARACTERS. 106

XXI.
HORACE MANN'S "OPINION." 111

XXII.
WHAT FANNY THINKS OF HOT WEATHER. 113

XXIII.
FAMILY JARS. 114

XXIV.
TWO IN HEAVEN. 119

XXV.
THE PRIVATE HISTORY OF DIDYMUS DAISY, ESQ. 121

XXVI.
THE WEDDING DRESS. 125

XXVII.
IS IT BEST TO USE ENVELOPES? 132

XXVIII.
FEMININE WISDOM. 137

XXIX.
ALWAYS SPEAK THE TRUTH. 139

XXX.
MOSES MILTIADES MILTON. 142

XXXI.
TOM VERSUS FAN; OR, A LITTLE TALK ABOUT LITTLE
THINGS. 145

XXXII.
A LETTER TO THE TRUE FLAG. 152

XXXIII.
THE ORPHAN. 154

XXXIV.
AN ANSWER TO MRS. CROWE. 160

XXXV.
MRS. FARRINGTON ON MATRIMONY. 162

XXXVI.
A WHISPER TO ROMANTIC YOUNG LADIES. 164

XXXVII.
A WOMAN WITH A SOUL. 168

XXXVIII.
CLERICAL COURTING. 170

XXXIX.
WHAT FOWLER SAYS. 175

XL.
THE OTHER SIDE. 179

XLI.
THE GOOD-NATURED BACHELOR. 186

XLII.
CATCHING THE DEAR. 188

XLIII.
HELEN, THE VILLAGE ROSE-BUD. 190

XLIV.
SINGLE BLESSEDNESS. 200

XLV.
THAT MRS. JONES. 201

XLVI.
MRS. JUPITER'S SOLILOQUY. 204

XLVII.
THE UNFAITHFUL LOVER. 206

XLVIII.
PETTICOAT PARLIAMENT. 213

XLIX.
FANNY FERN ON WIDOWERS. 215

L.
AN HOUR WITH FANNY'S FATHER. 217

LI.
JOHN BULL'S OPINION OF "RUTH HALL." 222

LII.
ORTHODOX TESTIMONY. 225

LIII.
ANOTHER FERN. 227

LIV.
THE BEST OF MEN HAVE THEIR FAILINGS. 229

LV.
THE MISTAKE OF A LIFE-TIME. 231

LVI.
A WIFE'S DEVOTION. 238

LVII.
MRS. ZEBEDEE SMITH'S PHILOSOPHY. 243

LVIII.
INTERESTING TO BASHFUL MEN. 246

LIX.
THE ANGEL CHILD. 249

LX.
UNCLE BEN'S ATTACK OF SPRING-FEVER. 253

LXI.
CONNUBIAL ADVERTISEMENT. 258

LXII.
WHAT FANNY THINKS ABOUT SEWING-MACHINES. 260

LXIII.
THE TIME TO CHOOSE. 263

LXIV.
OUR NELLY. 265

LXV.
I CAN'T. 269

LXVI.
MRS. SMITH'S REVERIE. 271

LXVII.
A NIGHT-WATCH WITH A DEAD INFANT. 273

LXVIII.
A LITTLE GOOD ADVICE. 275

LXIX.
THE OTHER ONE. 277

LXX.
A PEN AND INK SKETCH. 280

LXXI.
FANNY'S "RULES FOR LADIES." 283

LXXII.
THE LITTLE PAUPER. 286

LXXIII.
WHAT FANNY THINKS ABOUT FRIENDSHIP. 289

LXXIV.
TRUTH STRANGER THAN FICTION. 292

LXXV.
DON'T DISTURB HIM. 299

LXXVI.
A MODEL HUSBAND. 301

LXXVII.
WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU ARE ANGRY. 303

LXXVIII.
THE EARLY BLIGHT. 305

LXXIX.
THERE'S ROOM ENOUGH FOR ALL. 309

LXXX.
THE CROSS AND THE CROWN. 312

LXXXI.
TOM FAY'S SOLILOQUY. 314

LXXXII.
A CHAPTER ON CLERGYMEN. 318

LXXXIII.
FANNY FERN ON HUSBANDS. 321

LXXXIV.
FANNY'S IDEAS OF MONEY MATTERS. 324

LXXXV
A LETTER TO A SELF-EXILED FRIEND IN THE
COUNTRY. 327

LIFE AND BEAUTIES

OF

FANNY FERN