Chapter XXVIII: Feminine Wisdom

We insert the following for the special benefit of the ladies. It is true, Fanny very characteristically informs us, that they 'don't all know as much as _she_ does,' but then that is hardly to be expected.

"Tupper, speaking of the choice of a wife, says, 'Hath she wisdom? it is precious, but _beware that thou exceed_!'

"My dear sir, wasn't you caught napping that time? Didn't you speak in meeting? Didn't cloven feet peep out of your literary shoes? Don't it take an American woman to see through you! Isn't that a tacit acknowledgment that there _are_ women who do 'exceed?' Wouldn't you think so if you lived _this_ side the pond? Hope you don't judge _us_ by John Bull's daughters, who stupefy themselves on roast-beef and porter. I tell you Yankee women are on the squirrel order. You'd lose your English breath trying to follow them. There isn't a man here in America that knows as much as his wife. Some of them _own_ it, and some don't, but they all believe it, like gospel. They ask our opinion about everything. Sometimes straightforward, and sometimes in a circle--but they _ask it_! There are petticoats in the pulpit, petticoats in the editorial chair, petticoats in the lecturer's desk, petticoats behind the counter, petticoats labelled 'M. D.' Oh, _they 'exceed_!' no mistake about that. All femality is wide awake over here, Mr. Tupper. They crowd, and jostle, and push, just as if they wore hats. I don't uphold them in _that_, because, as I tell them, 'tis better policy to play possum, and wear the mask of submission. No use in rousing any _unnecessary_ antagonism. _But they don't all know as much as I do._ I shall reach the goal just as quick in my velvet shoes, as if I tramped on rough-shod as they do, with their _Woman's Rights Convention brogans_!"