Chapter LXIII: The Time to Choose

Mrs. Chrissholm says:--"The best time to choose a wife is early in the morning. If a young lady is at all inclined to sulks and slatternness, it is just before breakfast. As a general thing, a woman don't get on her temper, till after 10 A. M."

Very spiritedly Fanny makes answer:--

"'_Men_ never look slovenly before breakfast--no indeed! Never run round vestless in their stocking-feet, with dressing-gown inside out; soiled hankerchief hanging by one corner out of the pocket; minus dickey; minus neck-tie; pantaloon straps flying at their heels; suspenders streaming from their waistband; chin shaved on one side, lathered on the other; last night's coat and pants on the floor, just where they hopped out of them; face snarled up in forty wrinkles, because the chamber fire won't burn; and because it snows; and because the office-boy hasn't been for the keys; and because the newspaper hasn't come; and because they smoked too many cigars _by one dozen_, the night before; and because they lost _that_ bet, and can't pay the _Scot-t_; and because there's an omelet instead of a chicken-leg for breakfast; and because they are out of sorts and shaving-soap; and out of cigars and credit; and can't _any how_ 'get their temper on,' till they get some money and a mint julap!

"Any time 'before 10 o'clock,' is the time to 'choose' a husband--_perhaps_!"