Chapter XCIV: Letter I: found that Will was fallen off from his former Gayety, having (3)

When I have been present in Assemblies where my Paper has been talked of, I have been very well pleased to hear those who would detract from the Author of it observe, that the Letters which are sent to the _Spectator_ are as good, if not better than any of his Works. Upon this Occasion many Letters of Mirth are usually mentioned, which some think the _Spectator_ writ to himself, and which others commend because they fancy he received them from his Correspondents: Such are those from the _Valetudinarian;_ the Inspector of the Sign-Posts; the Master of the Fan-Exercise: with that of the Hoop'd Petticoat; that of _Nicholas Hart_ the annual Sleeper; that from Sir _John Envill;_ that upon the _London_ Cries; with multitudes of the same nature. As I love nothing more than to mortify the Ill-natured, that I may do it effectually, I must acquaint them, they have very often praised me when they did not design it, and that they have approved my Writings when they thought they had derogated from them. I have heard several of these unhappy Gentlemen proving, by undeniable Arguments, that I was not able to pen a Letter which I had written the Day before. Nay, I have heard some of them throwing out ambiguous Expressions, and giving the Company reason to suspect that they themselves did me the Honour to send me such or such a particular Epistle, which happened to be talked of with the Esteem or Approbation of those who were present. These rigid Criticks are so afraid of allowing me any thing which does not belong to me, that they will not be positive whether the Lion, the wild Boar, and the Flower-pots in the Play-house, did not actually write those Letters which came to me in their Names. I must therefore inform these Gentlemen, that I often chuse this way of casting my Thoughts into a Letter, for the following Reasons; First, out of the Policy of those who try their Jest upon another, before they own it themselves. Secondly, because I would extort a little Praise from such who will never applaud any thing whose Author is known and certain. Thirdly, because it gave me an Opportunity of introducing a great variety of Characters into my Work, which could not have been done, had I always written in the Person of the _Spectator_. Fourthly, because the Dignity Spectatorial would have suffered, had I published as from my self those several ludicrous Compositions which I have ascribed to fictitious Names and Characters. And lastly, because they often serve to bring in, more naturally, such additional Reflections as have been placed at the End of them.

There are others who have likewise done me a very particular Honour, though undesignedly. These are such who will needs have it, that I have translated or borrowed many of my Thoughts out of Books which are written in other Languages. I have heard of a Person, who is more famous for his Library than his Learning, that has asserted this more than once in his private Conversation. Were it true, I am sure he could not speak it from his own Knowledge; but had he read the Books which he has collected, he would find this Accusation to be wholly groundless. Those who are truly learned will acquit me in this Point, in which I have been so far from offending, that I have been scrupulous perhaps to a Fault in quoting the Authors of several Passages which I might have made my own. But as this Assertion is in reality an Encomium on what I have published, I ought rather to glory in it, than endeavour to confute it.

Some are so very willing to alienate from me that small Reputation which might accrue to me from any of these my Speculations, that they attribute some of the best of them to those imaginary Manuscripts with which I have introduced them. There are others, I must confess, whose Objections have given me a greater Concern, as they seem to reflect, under this Head, rather on my Morality than on my Invention. These are they who say an Author is guilty of Falshood, when he talks to the Publick of Manuscripts which he never saw, or describes Scenes of Action or Discourse in which he was never engaged. But these Gentlemen would do well to consider, there is not a Fable or Parable which ever was made use of, that is not liable to this Exception; since nothing; according to this Notion, can be related innocently, which was not once Matter of Fact. Besides, I think the most ordinary Reader may be able to discover, by my way of writing, what I deliver in these Occurrences as Truth, and what as Fiction.

Since I am unawares engaged in answering the several Objections which have been made against these my Works, I must take Notice that there are some who affirm a Paper of this Nature should always turn upon diverting Subjects, and others who find Fault with every one of them that hath not an immediate Tendency to the Advancement of Religion or Learning. I shall leave these Gentlemen to dispute it out among themselves; since I see one half of my Conduct patronized by each side. Were I serious on an improper Subject, or trifling in a serious one, I should deservedly draw upon me the Censure of my Readers; or were I conscious of any thing in my Writings that is not innocent at least, or that the greatest part of them were not sincerely designed to discountenance Vice and Ignorance, and support the Interest of true Wisdom and Virtue, I should be more severe upon my self than the Publick is disposed to be. In the mean while I desire my Reader to consider every particular Paper or Discourse as a distinct Tract by itself, and independent of every thing that goes before or after it.

I shall end this Paper with the following Letter, which was really sent me, as some others have been which I have published, and for which I must own my self indebted to their respective Writers.

SIR,

I was this Morning in a Company of your Well-wishers, when we read
over, with great Satisfaction, _Tully's_ Observations on Action
adapted to the _British_ Theatre: Though, by the way, we were very
sorry to find that you have disposed of another Member of your Club.
Poor Sir _Roger_ is dead, and the worthy Clergyman dying. Captain
_Sentry_ has taken Possession of a fair Estate; _Will. Honeycomb_ has
married a Farmer's Daughter; and the _Templar_ withdraws himself into
the Business of his own Profession. What will all this end in? We are
afraid it portends no Good to the Publick. Unless you very speedily
fix a Day for the Election of new Members, we are under Apprehensions
of losing the _British Spectator_. I hear of a Party of Ladies who
intend to address you on this Subject, and question not, if you do not
give us the Slip very suddenly, that you will receive Addresses from
all Parts of the Kingdom to continue so useful a Work. Pray deliver us
out of this Perplexity, and among the Multitude of your Readers you
will particularly oblige

_Your most Sincere Friend and Servant,_

Philo-Spec.

O.

* * * * *

No. 543. Saturday, November 22, 1712. Addison.

'--Facies non omnibus una
Nec diversa tamen--'

Ov.

Those who were skillful in Anatomy among the Ancients, concluded from the outward and inward Make of an Human Body, that it was the Work of a Being transcendently Wise and Powerful. As the World grew more enlightened in this Art, their Discoveries gave them fresh Opportunities of admiring the Conduct of Providence in the Formation of an Human Body. _Galen_ was converted by his Dissections, and could not but own a Supreme Being upon a Survey of this his Handy-work. There were, indeed, many Parts of which the old Anatomists did not know the certain Use; but as they saw that most of those which they examined were adapted with admirable Art to their several Functions, they did not question but those, whose Uses they could not determine, were contrived with the same Wisdom for respective Ends and Purposes. Since the Circulation of the Blood has been found out, and many other great Discoveries have been made by our modern Anatomists, we see new Wonders in the Human Frame, and discern several important Uses for those Parts, which Uses the Ancients knew nothing of. In short, the Body of Man is such a Subject as stands the utmost Test of Examination. Though it appears formed with the nicest Wisdom, upon the most superficial Survey of it, it still mends upon the Search, and produces our Surprize and Amazement in proportion as we pry into it. What I have here said of an Human Body, may be applied to the Body of every Animal which has been the Subject of Anatomical Observations.

The Body of an Animal is an Object adequate to our Senses. It is a particular System of Providence, that lies in a narrow Compass. The Eye is able to command it, and by successive Enquiries can search into all its Parts. Could the Body of the whole Earth, or indeed the whole Universe, be thus submitted to the Examination of our Senses, were it not too big and disproportioned for our Enquiries, too unwieldy for the Management of the Eye and Hand, there is no question but it would appear to us as curious and well-contrived a Frame as that of an Human Body. We should see the same Concatenation and Subserviency, the same Necessity and Usefulness, the same Beauty and Harmony in all and every of its Parts, as what we discover in the Body of every single Animal.

The more extended our Reason is, and the more able to grapple with immense Objects, the greater still are those Discoveries which it makes of Wisdom and Providence in the Work of the Creation. A Sir _Isaac Newton_, who stands up as the Miracle of the Present Age, can look through a whole Planetary System; consider it in its Weight, Number, and Measure; and draw from it as many Demonstrations of infinite Power and Wisdom, as a more confined Understanding is able to deduce from the System of an Human Body.

But to return to our Speculations on Anatomy. I shall here consider the Fabrick and Texture of the Bodies of Animals in one particular View; which, in my Opinion, shews the Hand of a thinking and all-wise Being in their Formation, with the Evidence of a thousand Demonstrations. I think we may lay this down as an incontested Principle, that Chance never acts in a perpetual Uniformity and Consistence with it self. If one should always fling the same number with ten thousand Dice, or see every Throw just five times less, or five times more in Number than the Throw which immediately preceded it, who would not imagine there is some invisible Power which directs the Cast? This is the Proceeding which we find in the Operations of Nature. Every kind of Animal is diversified by different Magnitudes, each of which gives rise to a different Species. Let a Man trace the Dog or Lion-Kind, and he will observe how many of the Works of Nature are published, if I may use the Expression, in a variety of Editions. If we look into the Reptile World, or into those different Kinds of Animals that fill the Element of Water, we meet with the same Repetitions among several Species, that differ very little from one another, but in Size and Bulk. You find the same Creature that is drawn at large, copied out in several Proportions, and ending in Miniature. It would be tedious to produce Instances of this regular Conduct in Providence, as it would be superfluous to those who are versed in the natural History of Animals. The magnificent Harmony of the Universe is such, that we may observe innumerable _Divisions_ running upon the same _Ground_. I might also extend this Speculation to the dead Parts of Nature, in which we may find Matter disposed into many _similar_ Systems, as well in our Survey of Stars and Planets, as of Stones, Vegetables, and other sublunary Parts of the Creation. In a Word, Providence has shewn the Richness of its Goodness and Wisdom, not only in the Production of many Original Species, but in the Multiplicity of Descants which it has made on every Original Species in particular.

But to pursue this Thought still farther; Every living Creature, considered in it self, has many very complicated Parts, that are exact copies of some other Parts which it possesses, and which are complicated in the same Manner. One _Eye_ would have been sufficient for the Subsistence and Preservation of an Animal; but in order to better his Condition, we see another placed with a Mathematical Exactness in the same most advantageous Situation, and in every particular of the same Size and Texture. Is it possible for Chance to be thus delicate and uniform in her Operations? Should a Million of Dice turn up twice together the same Number, the Wonder would be nothing in comparison with this. But when we see this Similitude and Resemblance in the Arm, the Hand, the Fingers; when we see one half of the Body entirely correspond with the other in all those minute Strokes, without which a Man might have very well subsisted; nay, when we often see a single Part repeated an hundred times in the same Body, notwithstanding it consists of the most intricate weaving of numberless Fibres, and these Parts differing still in Magnitude, as the Convenience of their particular Situation requires; sure a Man must have a strange Cast of Understanding, who does not discover the Finger of God in so wonderful a Work. These Duplicates in those Parts of the Body, without which a Man might have very well subsisted, though not so well as with them, are a plain Demonstration of an all-wise Contriver; as those more numerous Copyings, which are found among the Vessels of the same Body, are evident Demonstrations that they could not be the Work of Chance. This Argument receives additional Strength, if we apply it to every Animal and Insect within our Knowledge, as well as to those numberless living Creatures that are Objects too minute for a Human Eye; and if we consider how the several Species in this whole World of Life resemble one another in very many Particulars, so far as is convenient for their respective States of Existence; it is much more probable that an hundred Million of Dice should be casually thrown a hundred Million of Times in the same number, than that the Body of any single Animal should be produced by the fortuitous Concourse of Matter. And that the like Chance should arise in innumerable Instances, requires a degree of Credulity that is not under the direction of Common Sense. [We may carry this Consideration yet further, if we reflect on the two Sexes in every living Species, with their Resemblances to each other, and those particular Distinctions that were necessary for the keeping up of this great World of Life.]

There are many more Demonstrations of a Supreme Being, and of his transcendent Wisdom, Power, and Goodness in the Formation of the Body of a living Creature, for which I refer my Reader to other Writings, particularly to the Sixth Book of the Poem, entitled Creation, [1] where the Anatomy of the human Body is described with great Perspicuity and Elegance. I have been particular on the Thought which runs through this Speculation, because I have not seen it enlarged upon by others.

O.

[Footnote 1: Blackmore's.]

* * * * *

No. 544. Monday, November 24, 1712. Steele.

'Nunquam ita quisquam bene subducta ratione ad vitam fuit
Quia res, Ætas usus semper aliquid apportet novi
Aliquid moneat, ut illa, quæ te scire credas, nescias
Et, quæ tibi putaris prima, in experiundo ut repudies.'

Ter.

There are, I think, Sentiments in the following Letter from my Friend Captain SENTRY, which discover a rational and equal Frame of Mind, as well prepared for an advantageous as an unfortunate Change of Condition.

_Coverley-Hall, Nov._ 15, _Worcestershire._

_SIR_,

'I am come to the Succession of the Estate of my honoured Kinsman Sir
ROGER DE COVERLEY; and I assure you I find it no easy Task to keep up
the Figure of Master of the Fortune which was so handsomely enjoyed by
that honest plain Man. I cannot (with respect to the great Obligations
I have, be it spoken) reflect upon his Character, but I am confirmed
in the Truth which I have, I think, heard spoken at the Club, to wit,
That a Man of a warm and well-disposed Heart with a very small
Capacity, is highly superior in human Society to him who with the
greatest Talents is cold and languid in his Affections. But, alas! why
do I make a difficulty in speaking of my worthy Ancestor's Failings?
His little Absurdities and Incapacity for the Conversation of the
politest Men are dead with him, and his greater Qualities are even now
useful to him. I know not whether by naming those Disabilities I do
not enhance his Merit, since he has left behind him a Reputation in
his Country which would be worth the Pains of the wisest Man's whole
Life to arrive at. By the way I must observe to you, that many of your
Readers have mistook that Passage in your Writings, wherein Sir ROGER
is reported to have enquired into the private Character of the young
Woman at the Tavern. I know you mentioned that Circumstance as an
Instance of the Simplicity and Innocence of his Mind, which made him
imagine it a very easy thing to reclaim one of those Criminals, and
not as an Inclination in him to be guilty with her. The less
discerning of your Readers cannot enter into that Delicacy of
Description in the Character: But indeed my chief Business at this
time is to represent to you my present State of Mind, and the
Satisfactions I promise to my self in the Possession of my new
Fortune. I have continued all Sir ROGER'S Servants, except such as it
was a Relief to dismiss into little Beings within my Manor: Those who
are in a List of the good Knight's own Hand to be taken care of by me,
I have quartered upon such as have taken new Leases of me, and added
so many Advantages during the Lives of the Persons so quartered, that
it is the Interest of those whom they are joined with, to cherish and
befriend them upon all Occasions. I find a considerable Sum of ready
Money, which I am laying out among my Dependants at the common
Interest, but with a Design to lend it according to their Merit,
rather than according to their Ability. I shall lay a Tax upon such as
I have highly obliged, to become Security to me for such of their own
poor Youth, whether Male or Female, as want Help towards getting into
some Being in the World. I hope I shall be able to manage my Affairs
so, as to improve my Fortune every Year, by doing Acts of Kindness. I
will lend my Money to the Use of none but indigent Men, secured by
such as have ceased to be indigent by the Favour of my Family or my
self. What makes this the more practicable, is, that if they will do
any one Good with my Money, they are welcome to it upon their own
Security: And I make no Exception against it, because the Persons who
enter into the Obligations, do it for their own Family. I have laid
out four thousand Pounds this way, and it is not to be imagined what a
Crowd of People are obliged by it. In Cases where Sir ROGER has
recommended, I have lent Money to put out Children, with a Clause
which makes void the Obligation, in case the Infant dies before he is
out of his Apprenticeship; by which means the Kindred and Masters are
extremely careful of breeding him to Industry, that he may repay it
himself by his Labour, in three Years Journeywork after his Time is
out, for the Use of his Securities. Opportunities of this kind are all
that have occurred since I came to my Estate; but I assure you I will
preserve a constant Disposition to catch at all the Occasions I can to
promote the Good and Happiness of my Neighbourhood.

'But give me leave to lay before you a little Establishment which has
grown out of my past Life, that I doubt not, will administer great
Satisfaction to me in that Part of it, whatever that is, which is to
come.

'There is a Prejudice in favour of the Way of Life to which a Man has
been educated, which I know not whether it would not be faulty to
overcome: It is like a Partiality to the Interest of one's own Country
before that of any other Nation. It is from an Habit of Thinking,
grown upon me from my Youth spent in Arms, that I have ever held
Gentlemen, who have preserved Modesty, Good-nature, Justice, and
Humanity in a Soldier's Life, to be the most valuable and worthy
Persons of the human Race. To pass through imminent Dangers, suffer
painful Watchings, frightful Alarms, and laborious Marches for the
greater part of a Man's Time, and pass the rest in a Sobriety
conformable to the Rules of the most virtuous civil Life, is a Merit
too great to deserve the Treatment it usually meets with among the
other part of the World. But I assure you, Sir, were there not very
many who have this Worth, we could never have seen the glorious Events
which we have in our Days. I need not say more to illustrate the
Character of a Soldier, than to tell you he is the very contrary to
him you observe loud, sawcy, and over-bearing in a red Coat about
Town. But I was going to tell you, that in Honour of the Profession of
Arms, I have set apart a certain Sum of Money for a Table for such
Gentlemen as have served their Country in the Army, and will please
from Time to Time to sojourn all, or any Part of the Year, at
_Coverley_. Such of them as will do me that Honour, shall find Horses,
Servants, and all things necessary for their Accommodation and
Enjoyment of all the Conveniences of Life in a pleasant various
Country. If Colonel _Camperfelt_ be in Town, and his Abilities are not
employ'd another way in the Service, there is no Man would be more
welcome here. That Gentleman's thorough Knowledge in his Profession,
together with the Simplicity of his Manners, and Goodness of his
Heart, would induce others like him to honour my Abode; and I should
be glad my Acquaintance would take themselves to be invited or not, as
their Characters have an Affinity to his.

'I would have all my Friends know, that they need not fear (though I
am become a Country Gentleman) I will trespass against their
Temperance and Sobriety. No, Sir, I shall retain so much of the good
Sentiments for the Conduct of Life, which we cultivated in each other
at our Club, as to contemn all inordinate Pleasures: But particularly
remember, with our beloved _Tully_, that the Delight in Food consists
in Desire, not Satiety. They who most passionately pursue Pleasure,
seldomest arrive at it. Now I am writing to a Philosopher, I cannot
forbear mentioning the Satisfaction I took in the Passage I read
Yesterday in the same _Tully_. A Nobleman of _Athens_ made a
Compliment to _Plato_ the Morning after he had supped at his House,
_Your Entertainments do not only please when you give them, but also
the Day after_.

_I am, My worthy Friend,

Your most obedient humble Servant,_

WILLIAM SENTRY.

* * * * *

No. 545. Tuesday, November 25, 1712. Steele.

'Quin potius Pacem Æternam pactosque Hymenæos
Exercemus--'

Virg.

I cannot but think the following Letter from the Emperor of _China_ to the Pope of _Rome_, proposing a Coalition of the _Chinese_ and _Roman_ Churches, will be acceptable to the Curious. I must confess I my self being of opinion that the Emperor has as much Authority to be Interpreter to him he pretends to expound, as the Pope has to be Vicar to the Sacred Person he takes upon him to represent, I was not a little pleased with their Treaty of Alliance. What Progress the Negotiation between his Majesty of _Rome_, and his Holiness of _China_ makes (as we daily Writers say upon Subjects where we are at a Loss) Time will let us know. In the mean time, since they agree in the Fundamentals of Power and Authority, and differ only in Matters of Faith, we may expect the Matter will go on without Difficulty.

Copia di Littera del Re della China al Papa, interpretata dal Padre
Segretario dell' India della Compagna di Giesu. [1]

_A Voi Benedetto sopra i benedetti PP, ed interpretatore grande de
Pontifici e Pastore Xmo dispensatore dell' oglio de i Rè d' Europe
Clemente XI._

'Il Favorite amico di Dio Gionata 7° Potentissimo sopra tutti i
potentissimi della terra, Altissmo sopra tutti gl' Altissmi sotto il
sole e la luna, che sede nella sede di smeraldo della China sopra
cento scalini d'oro, ad interpretare la lingua di Dio a tutti i
descendenti fedeli d'Abramo, che da la vita e la morte a cento
quindici regni, ed a cento settante Isole, scrive con la penna dello
Struzzo vergine, e manda salute ed accresimento di vecchiezza.

'Essendo arrivato il tempo in cui il fiore della reale nostro gioventu
deve maturare i Frutti della nostra vecchiezza, e confortare con quell
i desiderii dei populi nostri divoti, e propogare il seme di quella
pianta che deve proteggerli, habbiamo Stabilito d'accompagnarci con
una virgine eccelsa ed amorosa allattata alia mammella della leonessa
forte e dell' Agnella mansueta. Percio essendo ci stato figurato
sempre il vostro populo Europeo Romano par paese di donne invitte, i
forte, e caste; allongiamo la nostra mano potente, a stringere una di
loro, e questa sara una vostra nipote, o nipote di qualche altro gran
Sacerdote Latino, che sia guardata dall' occhio dritto di Dio. Sara
seminata in lei l'Autorita di Sarra, la Fedelta d'Esther, e la
Sapienza di Abba; la vogliamo con l'occhio della colomba che guarda il
cielo, e la terra e con la bocca dello Conchiglia che si pasce della
ruggiada del matino. La sua eta non passi ducento corsi della Luna, la
sua statura sia alta quanto la spicca dritta del grano verde, e la sua
grossezza quanto un manipolo di grano secco. Noi la mandaremmo a
vestire per li nostri mandatici Ambasciadori, e chi la conduranno a
noi, e noi incontraremmo alla riva del fiume grande facendola salire
su nostro cocchio. Ella potra adorare appresso di noi il suo Dio, con
venti quatro altre vergini a sua ellezzione, e potra cantare con loro
come la Tortora alla Primavera.

'Sodisfando O Padre e amico nostro questa nostro brama, sarete
caggione di unire in perpetua amicitia cotesti vostri Regni d'Europa
al nostro dominante Imperio, e si abbracciranno le vostri leggi come
l'edera abbraccia la pianta, e noi medesemi Spargeremo del nostro seme
reale in coteste Provinci, riscaldando i letti di vostri Principi con
il fuoco amoroso delle nostre Amazoni, d'alcune delle quali i nostri
mandatici Ambasciadori vi porteranno le Somiglianze depinte. Vi
Confirmiamo di tenere in pace le due buone religiose famiglie delli
Missionarii gli' Figlioli d'Ignazio, e li bianchi e neri figlioli di
Dominico; il cui consiglio degl' uni e degl' altri ci serve di scorta
nel nostro regimento e di lume ad interpretare le divine Legge come
appuncto fa lume l'oglio che si getta in Mare. In tanto Alzandoci dal
nostro Trono per Abbracciarvi, vi dichiariamo nostro congiunto e
Confederato; ed ordiniamo che questo foglio sia segnato col nostro
Segno Imperiale dalla nostra Citta, Capo del Mondo, il quinto giorno
della terza lunatione l'anno quarto del nostro Imperio.

'Sigillo e un sole nelle cui faccia e anche quella della Luna ed
intorno tra i Raggi vi sono traposte alcune Spade.

'Dico il Traduttore che secondo il Ceremonial di questo Lettere e
recedentissimo specialmente Fessere scritto con la penna della Struzzo
vergine con la quella non soglionsi scrivere quei Re che le pregiere a
Dio e scrivendo a qualche altro Principe del Mondo, la maggior Finezza
che usino, e scrivergli con la penna del Pavone.

A Letter from the Emperor of _China_ to the Pope, interpreted by a
Father Jesuit, Secretary to the _Indies_.

_To you blessed above the Blessed, great Emperor of Bishops, and
Pastor of Christians, Dispenser of the Oil of the Kings of Europe_,
Clement XI.

"The Favourite Friend of God _Gionnata_ the VIIth, most Powerful above
the most Powerful of the Earth, Highest above the Highest under the
Sun and Moon, who sits on a Throne of Emerald of _China_, above 100
Steps of Gold, to interpret the Language of God to the faithful, and
who gives Life and Death to 115 Kingdoms, and 170 Islands; he writes
with the Quill of a Virgin _Ostrich_, and sends Health and Increase of
old Age.

"Being arrived at the time of our Age, in which the Flower of our
Royal Youth ought to ripen into Fruit towards old Age, to comfort
therewith the Desire of our devoted People, and to propagate the Seed
of that Plant which must protect them; We have determined to accompany
our selves with an high Amorous Virgin, suckled at the Breast of a
wild Lioness, and a meek Lamb; and imagining with our selves that your
_European Roman_ People is the Father of many unconquerable and chaste
Ladies: We stretch out our powerful Arm to embrace one of them, and
she shall be one of your Neices, or the Neice of some other great
_Latin_ Priest, the Darling of God's Right Eye. Let the Authority of
_Sarah_ be sown in her, the Fidelity of _Esther_, and the Wisdom of
_Abba_. We would have her Eye like that of a _Dove_, which may look
upon Heaven and Earth, with the Mouth of a Shell-Fish to feed upon the
Dew of the Morning; Her Age must not exceed 200 Courses of the Moon;
let her Stature be equal to that of an Ear of green Corn, and her
Girth a Handful.

"We will send our _Mandarine's_ Embassadors to clothe her, and to
conduct her to us, and we will meet her on the Bank of the great
River, making her to leap up into our Chariot. She may with us worship
her own God; together with twenty four Virgins of her own chusing; and
she may sing with them, as the _Turtle_ in the Spring. You, O Father
and Friend, complying with this our Desire, maybe an occasion of
uniting in perpetual Friendship our high Empire with your _European_
Kingdoms, and we may embrace your Laws, as the _Ivy_ embraces the
Tree; and we our selves may scatter our Royal Blood into your
Provinces, warming the chief of your Princes with the amorous Fire of
our _Amazons_, the resembling Pictures of some of which our said
_Mandarine's_ Embassadors shall convey to you.

"We exhort you to keep in Peace two good Religious Families of
_Missionaries_, the black Sons of _Ignatius_, and the white and black
Sons of _Dominicus_; that the Counsel, both of the one and the other,
may serve as a Guide to us in our Government, and a Light to interpret
the Divine Law, as the Oil cast into the Sea produces Light.

"To conclude, we rising up in our Throne to embrace you, we declare
you our Ally and Confederate; and have ordered this Leaf to be sealed
with our Imperial Signet, in our Royal City the Head of the World, the
8th Day of the third Lunation, and the 4th Year of our Reign."

Letters from _Rome_ say, the whole Conversation both among Gentlemen and Ladies has turned upon the Subject of this Epistle, ever since it arrived. The Jesuit who translated it says, it loses much of the Majesty of the Original in the _Italian_. It seems there was an Offer of the same nature made by a Predecessor of the present Emperor to _Lewis_ the XIIIth of France, but no Lady of that Court would take the Voyage, that Sex not being at that time so much used in politick Negotiations. The manner of treating the Pope is, according to the _Chinese_ Ceremonial, very respectful: For the Emperor writes to him with the Quill of a Virgin _Ostrich_, which was never used before but in Writing Prayers. Instructions are preparing for the Lady who shall have so much Zeal as to undertake this Pilgrimage, and be an Empress for the sake of her Religion. The Principal of the _Indian_ Missionaries has given in a List of the reigning Sins in _China_, in order to prepay the Indulgences necessary to this Lady and her Retinue, in advancing the Interests of the _Roman Catholic Religion_ in those Kingdoms.

_To the_ SPECTATOR-GENERAL.

_May it please your Honour_,

'I have of late seen _French_ Hats, of a prodigious Magnitude, pass by
my Observatory.

_John Sly._

T.

[Footnote 1: No suggestion has been made as to the authorship of this squib on the Jesuits in China.]

* * * * *

No. 546. Wednesday, November 26, 1712. Steele.

'Omnia patefacienda ut ne quid omnino quod venditor norit, emptor
ignoret.'

Tull.

It gives me very great Scandal to observe, where-ever I go, how much Skill, in buying all manner of Goods, there is necessary to defend yourself from being cheated in whatever you see exposed to Sale. My Reading makes such a strong impression upon me, that I should think my self a Cheat in my Way, if I should translate any thing from another Tongue, and not acknowledge it to my Readers. I understood from common Report, that Mr. _Cibber_ was introducing a _French_ Play upon our Stage, and thought my self concerned to let the Town know what was his, and what foreign. [1] When I came to the Rehearsal, I found the House so partial to one of their own Fraternity, that they gave every thing which was said such Grace, Emphasis, and Force in their Action, that it was no easy matter to make any Judgment of the Performance. Mrs. _Oldfield_, who, it seems, is the Heroick Daughter, had so just a Conception of her Part, that her Action made what she spoke appear decent, just, and noble. The Passions of Terrour and Compassion, they made me believe were very artfully raised, and the whole Conduct of the Play artful and surprizing. We Authors do not much relish the Endeavours of Players in this kind; but have the same Disdain as Physicians and Lawyers have when Attorneys and Apothecaries give Advice. _Cibber_ himself took the liberty to tell me, that he expected I would do him Justice, and allow the Play well-prepared for his Spectators, whatever it was for his Readers. He added very many Particulars not uncurious concerning the manner of taking an Audience, and laying wait not only for their superficial Applause, but also for insinuating into their Affections and Passions, by the artful Management of the Look, Voice, and Gesture of the Speaker. I could not but consent that the Heroick Daughter appeared in the Rehearsal a moving Entertainment wrought out of a great and exemplary Virtue.

The Advantages of Action, Show, and Dress on these Occasions are allowable, because the Merit consists in being capable of imposing upon us to our Advantage and Entertainment. All that I was going to say about the Honesty of an Author in the Sale of his Ware, was that he ought to own all that he had borrowed from others, and lay in a clear light all that he gives his Spectators for their Money, with an Account of the first Manufacturers. But I intended to give the Lecture of this Day upon the common and prostituted Behaviour of Traders in ordinary Commerce. The Philosopher made it a Rule of Trade, that your Profit ought to be the common Profit; and it is unjust to make any Step towards Gain, wherein the Gain of even those to whom you sell is not also consulted. A Man may deceive himself if he thinks fit, but he is no better than a Cheat who sells any thing without telling the Exceptions against it, as well as what is to be said to its Advantage. The scandalous abuse of Language and hardening of Conscience, which may be observed every Day in going from one Place to another, is what makes a whole City to an unprejudiced Eye a Den of Thieves. It was no small pleasure to me for this reason to remark, as I passed by _Cornhill_, that the Shop of that worthy, honest, tho' lately unfortunate, Citizen, Mr. _John Moreton_, [2] so well known in the Linnen Trade, is fitting up a-new. Since a Man has been in a distressed Condition, it ought to be a great Satisfaction to have passed thro' it in such a Manner as not to have lost the Friendship of those who suffered with him, but to receive an honourable Acknowledgment of his Honesty from those very Persons to whom the Law had consigned his Estate.

The Misfortune of this Citizen is like to prove of a very general Advantage to those who shall deal with him hereafter: For the Stock with which he now sets up being the Loan of his Friends, he cannot expose that to the Hazard of giving Credit, but enters into a Ready-Money Trade, by which Means he will both buy and sell the best and cheapest. He imposes upon himself a Rule of affixing the Value of each Piece he sells to the Piece it self; so that the most ignorant Servant or Child will be as good a Buyer at his Shop as the most skilful in the Trade. For all which, you have all his Hopes and Fortune for your Security. To encourage Dealing after this Way, there is not only the avoiding the most infamous Guilt in ordinary Bartering; but this Observation, That he who buys with ready Money saves as much to his Family, as the State exacts out of his Land for the Security and Service of his Country; that is to say, in plain _English_, Sixteen will do as much as Twenty Shillings.

_Mr._ SPECTATOR,

'My Heart is so swelled with grateful Sentiments on account of some
Favours which I have lately received, that I must beg leave to give
them Utterance amongst the Croud of other anonymous Correspondents;
and writing, I hope, will be as great a Relief to my forced Silence,
as it is to your natural Taciturnity--My generous Benefactor will not
suffer me to speak to him in any Terms of Acknowledgment, but ever
treats me as if he had the greatest Obligations, and uses me with a
Distinction that is not to be expected from one so much my Superiour
in Fortune, Years, and Understanding. He insinuates, as if I had a
certain Right to his Favours from some Merit, which his particular
Indulgence to me has discovered but that is only a beautiful Artifice
to lessen the Pain an honest Mind feels in receiving Obligations, when
there is no probability of returning them.

'A gift is doubled when accompanied with such a Delicacy of Address;
but what to me gives it an inexpressible Value, is its coming from the
Man I most esteem in the World. It pleases me indeed, as it is an
Advantage and Addition to my Fortune; but when I consider it is an
Instance of that good Man's Friendship, it overjoys, it transports me;
I look on it with a Lover's Eye, and no longer regard the Gift, but
the Hand that gave it. For my Friendship is so entirely void of any
gainful Views, that it often gives me Pain to think it should have
been chargeable to him; and I cannot at some melancholy Hours help
doing his Generosity the Injury of fearing it should cool on this
account, and that the last Favour might be a sort of Legacy of a
departing Friendship.

'I Confess these Fears seem very groundless and unjust, but you must
forgive them to the Apprehension of one possessed of a great Treasure,
who is frighted at the most distant Shadow of Danger.

'Since I have thus far open'd my Heart to you, I will not conceal the
secret Satisfaction I feel there of knowing the Goodness of my Friend
will not be unrewarded. I am pleased with thinking the Providence of
the Almighty hath sufficient Blessings in store for him, and will
certainly discharge the Debt, though I am not made the happy
Instrument of doing it.

'However, nothing in my power shall be wanting to shew my Gratitude; I
will make it the Business of my Life to thank him, and shall esteem
(next to him) those my best Friends, who give me greatest Assistance
in this good Work. Printing this Letter would be some little Instance
of my Gratitude; and your Favour herein will very much oblige

_Your most humble Servant, &c._

W. C.

Nov. 24th.

T.

[Footnote 1: _Ximena_, or the _Heroic Daughter_, a Tragedy taken from the _Cid_ of Corneille, by Colley Gibber. The play was not published until after Steele's pamphlet, 'The Crisis,' had exposed him to political and (as it necessarily followed in those days) personal detraction. Cibber then dedicated his play to Steele, referring to the custom of his calumniators, since they could not deny his literary services, to transfer all the merit of them to Addison, upon whom he had so generously heaped more than the half of his own fame, and said:

"Your Enemies therefore, thus knowing that your own consent had partly
justified their insinuations, saved a great deal of their malice from
being ridiculous, and fairly left you to apply to such your singular
conduct what Mark Antony says of Octavius in the play:

'Fool that I was! upon my Eagle's wings
I bore this Wren, 'till I was tired with soaring,
And now, he mounts above me.'"

True-hearted Steele never read his relation to his friend in this fashion. With how fine a disregard of conventional dignity is the latter part of this paper given by Steele to the kind effort to help in setting a fallen man upon his legs again!]

[Footnote 2: See No. 248. To this Mr. Moreton was addressed the letter signed W. S., from Sir William Scawen.]

* * * * *

No. 547. Thursday, November 27, 1712. Addison.

'Si vulnus tibi monstratâ radice vel herbâ
Non fieret levius, fugeres radice vel herbâ
Proficiente nihil curarier--'

Hor.

It is very difficult to praise a Man without putting him out of Countenance. My following Correspondent has found out this uncommon Art, and, together with his Friends, has celebrated some of my Speculations after such a concealed but diverting manner, that if any of my Readers think I am to blame in Publishing my own Commendations, they will allow I should have deserved their Censure as much, had I suppressed the Humour in which they are convey'd to me.

_SIR,_

'I am often in a private Assembly of Wits of both Sexes, where we
generally descant upon your Speculations, or upon the Subjects on
which you have treated. We were last _Tuesday_ talking of those two
Volumes which you have lately published. Some were commending one of
your Papers, and some another; and there was scarce a single Person in
the Company that had not a favourite Speculation. Upon this a Man of
Wit and Learning told us, he thought it would not be amiss if we paid
the _Spectator_ the same Compliment that is often made in our publick
Prints to Sir _William Read_, Dr. _Grant_, Mr. _Moor_ the Apothecary;
[1] and other eminent Physicians, where it is usual for the Patients
to publish the Cures which have been made upon them, and the several
Distempers under which they laboured. The Proposal took, and the Lady
where we visited having the two last Volumes in large Paper
interleav'd for her own private use, ordered them to be brought down,
and laid in the Window, whither every one in the Company retired, and
writ down a particular Advertisement in the Style and Phrase of the
like ingenious Compositions which we frequently meet with at the end
of our News-Papers. When we had finish'd our Work, we read them with a
great deal of Mirth at the Fire-side, and agreed, _Nemine
contradicente_, to get them transcrib'd, and sent to the _Spectator_.
The Gentleman who made the Proposal enter'd the following
Advertisement before the Title-Page, after which the rest succeeded in
order.

_Remedium efficax et universum_; or, An effectual Remedy adapted to
all Capacities; shewing how any Person may Cure himself of
Ill-Nature, Pride, Party-Spleen, or any other Distemper incident to
the human System, with an easie way to know when the Infection is
upon him. This Panacea is as innocent as Bread, agreeable to the
Taste, and requires no Confinement. It has not its Equal in the
Universe, as Abundance of the Nobility and Gentry throughout the
Kingdom have experienced.

N. B. 'No Family ought to be without it.

_Over the two_ Spectators _on Jealousy, being the two first in the
third Volume._

I _William Crazy_, aged Threescore and seven, having been for
several Years afflicted with uneasie Doubts, Fears and Vapours,
occasion'd by the Youth and Beauty of _Mary_ my Wife, aged twenty
five, do hereby for the Benefit of the Publick give Notice, that I
have found great Relief from the two following Doses, having taken
them two Mornings together with a Dish of Chocolate. Witness my
Hand, &c.

_For the Benefit of the Poor._

'In charity to such as are troubled with the Disease of Levee-
Haunting, and are forced to seek their Bread every Morning at the
Chamber Doors of great Men, I _A. B._ do testifie, that for many
Years past I laboured under this fashionable Distemper, but was
cured of it by a Remedy which I bought of Mrs. _Baldwin_, contain'd
in an Half-Sheet of Paper, marked No. 193. where any one may be
provided with the same Remedy at the price of a single Penny.

An infallible Cure for _Hypocondriack Melancholys_.

No. 173. 184. 191. 203. 209. 221. 233. 235. 239. 245. 247. 251.

Probatum est. _Charles Easy_.

'I _Christopher Query_ having been troubled with a certain Distemper
in my Tongue, which shewed it self in impertinent and superfluous
Interrogatories, have not asked one unnecessary Question since my
Perusal of the Prescription marked No. 228.

'The _Britannick Beautifyer_, being an Essay on Modesty, No. 231.
which gives such a delightful Blushing Colour to the Cheeks of those
that are White or Pale, that it is not to be distinguished from a
natural fine Complection, nor perceived to be artificial by the
nearest Friend: Is nothing of Paint, or in the least hurtful. It
renders the Face delightfully handsome; is not subject to be rubbed
off, and cannot be parallelled by either Wash, Powder, Cosmetick,
&c. It is certainly the best Beautifier in the World.

_Martha Gloworm._

'I _Samuel Self_, of the Parish of _St. James's_, having a
Constitution which naturally abounds with Acids, made use of a Paper
of Directions marked No. 177. recommending a healthful Exercise
called _Good-Nature_, and have found it a most excellent Sweetner of
the Blood.

'Whereas I, _Elizabeth Rainbow_, was troubled with that Distemper in
my Head, which about a Year ago was pretty Epidemical among the
Ladies, and discover'd it self in the Colour of their Hoods, having
made use of the Doctor's Cephalick Tincture, which he exhibited to
the Publick in one of his last Year's Papers, I recover'd in a very
few Days.

'I _George Gloom_ have for a long time been troubled with the
Spleen, and being advis'd by my Friends to put my self into a Course
of Steele, did for that end make use of Remedies convey'd to me
several Mornings, in short Letters, from the Hands of the invisible
Doctor. They were marked at the bottom _Nathaniel Henroost, Alice
Threadneedle, Rebecca Nettletop, Tom. Loveless, Mary Meanwell,
Thomas Smoaky, Anthony Freeman, Tom Meggot, Rustick Sprightly,_ &c.
which have had so good an Effect upon me, that I now find my self
chearful, lightsome and easie; and therefore do recommend them to
all such as labour under the same Distemper.

Not having room to insert all the Advertisements which were sent me, I have only picked out some few from the Third Volume, reserving the Fourth for another Opportunity.

O.

[Footnote 1: Sir William Read, a doctor who could hardly read, was one of the most pertinacious advertisers of his time. He advertised in the _Tatler_ that he had been 35 years in the practice of

'couching cataracts, taking off all sorts of wens, curing wry necks
and _hair_ lips without blemish, though never so deformed.'

His wife assisted him, and after his death carried on his business, advertising that,

'The Lady Read, in Durham Yard, in the Strand, having obtained a
peculiar method of couching cataracts and curing all diseases of the
eyes, by Sir William Read's method and medicines, and having had above
15 years' experience ... Note. Sir William Read has left only with his
lady the true receipt of his Styptich Water,' &c., &c.

Dr. Grant was another advertising oculist, illiterate and celebrated, originally a tinker or cobbler, afterwards a Baptist preacher in Southwark.

Mr. Moore sold a powder which, according to his advertisements, brought off worms of incredible length.]

* * * * *

No. 548. Friday, November 28, 1712. [1]

'--Vitiis nemo sine nascitur, optimus illo
Qui minimis urgetur--'

Hor.

_Nov._ 27, 1712.

_Mr._ SPECTATOR,

'I have read this Day's Paper with a great deal of Pleasure, and could
send you an Account of several Elixirs and Antidotes in your third
Volume, which your Correspondents have not taken Notice of in their
Advertisements; and at the same time must own to you, that I have
seldom seen a Shop furnished with such a Variety of Medicaments, and
in which there are fewer Soporifics. The several Vehicles you have
invented for conveying your unacceptable Truths to us, are what I most
particularly admire, as I am afraid they are Secrets which will die
with you. I do not find that any of your Critical Essays are taken
Notice of in this Paper, notwithstanding I look upon them to be
excellent Cleansers of the Brain, and could venture to superscribe
them with an Advertisement which I have lately seen in one of our
News-Papers, wherein there is an Account given of a Sovereign Remedy
for restoring the Taste of all such Persons whose Palates have been
vitiated by Distempers, unwholesome Food, or any the like Occasions.
But to let fall the Allusion, notwithstanding your Criticisms, and
particularly the Candour which you have discovered in them, are not
the least taking Part of your Works, I find your Opinion concerning
_Poetical Justice_, as it is expressed in the first Part of your
Fortieth _Spectator_, is controverted by some eminent Criticks; and as
you now seem, to our great Grief of Heart, to be winding up your
Bottoms, I hoped you would have enlarged a little upon that Subject.
It is indeed but a single Paragraph in your Works, and I believe those
who have read it with the same Attention I have done, will think there
is nothing to be objected against it. I have however drawn up some
additional Arguments to strengthen the Opinion which you have there
delivered, having endeavoured to go to the Bottom of that Matter,
which you may either publish or suppress as you think fit.

'_Horace_ in my Motto says, that all Men are vicious, and that they
differ from one another, only as they are more or less so. _Boileau_
has given the same Account of our Wisdom, as _Horace_ has of our
Virtue.

'Tous les homines sont fous, et, malgré tous leurs soins,
Ne different entre eux, que du plus et du moins.'

All Men, says he, are Fools, and, in spite of their Endeavours to the
contrary, differ from one another only as they are more or less so.

'Two or three of the old _Greek_ Poets have given the same turn to a
Sentence which describes the Happiness of Man in this Life;

[Greek: Tò zaen alypôs, andrós esti eutuchous]

'That Man is most happy who is the least miserable.

'It will not perhaps be unentertaining to the Polite Reader to observe
how these three beautiful Sentences are formed upon different Subjects
by the same way of thinking; but I shall return to the first of them.