Chapter M: Baily, Chat, D. Rat, Gammer, Hodge, Diccon (2)

SAP. The advice of Aristippus have in your mind,
Which willed me to seek such things as be permanent,
And not such as are of a vanishing kind,
For the one with the other is not equivalent.
Be circumspect, therefore, foreseeing and sapient,
For treasures here gotten are uncertain and vain,
But treasures of the mind do continually remain.

JUST. This is the mind of Musonus, also I remember,
Like as presently you have advertised me,
For the which I cannot but thankfully render
Such commendations as is requisite to be;
And as your name is Sapience, thus much I see,
That on heavenly wisdom you do depend,
And not on as time doth bring to an end.

SAP. Truth indeed, and therefore, your name being Just,
With me and my documents must be associate;
Where, contrary, such as are led by their lust,
To incline evil are always appropriate:
They have not, as you have, battle and combat
Against the cogitations that inwardly spring,
But rather are obedient unto the same thing:
And this is the occasion that men are so ambitious
And so foolish, led by the lust of their brain:
Sometime to covet, sometime to be vicious;
Sometime the counsel of the wise to disdain;
Sometime to climb till they fall down again;
Sometime to usurp the possessions of other;
Sometime to disobey both father and mother.

JUST. Alas, what availeth it riches to enjoy,
Though as much in comparison as Croesus the king?
What helpeth it to have Helen in Troy,
If the conscience of man continually sting?
Elation and Pride no commodity doth bring,
But is often known the forerunner of shame,
And the blot of immortal memory and fame.

_Enter_ INCLINATION, _the Vice_.

INC. Now, by my halidom, it is alone a:
Better sport in my life I never saw,
It is trim, I tell you, to dance with John and Jone a,
We pass not a point for God nor his law:
But Lust is lusty, and full of porridge:
Cogitation and he in one bed doth lie.
When here is Master Just, with his cank'red courage,
What, and old doting Sapience! then I am dressed, I.
So often already Just hath me restrained,
That I dare not entice him any more,
For through Sapience he hath me clearly disdained,
That my courage is spent, and I have no more.
[_Make as going back._

SAP. Nay, soft, sir, we must talk with you, ere ye go.

INC. I cannot tarry at this time, the truth is so.

JUST. Nay, there is no remedy; with you we must talk.

INC. By the body of me, I hold best that I walk,
Or else learn to speak language another while,
And so I may happen the knaves to beguile.

JUST. Turn back, ere you go, we have somewhat to say.

INC. Non point parle françois, non, par ma foy.

SAP. To deceive us now himself he doth prepare.

INC. Ick en can ghene english spreken von waer.
Body of me, let me go, or else I shall piss:
I-wis, Master Just, you have loved me ere this;
Therefore now be ruled after my counsel,
And godly things for your commodity I shall you tell.

SAP. Let him that is just not lightly ensue
His vile inclination and carnal concupiscence,
But let him rather contend the same to subdue;
And chiefly those that have knowledge of Sapience:
Therefore to bridle this lust do your diligence,
His crafty provocations utterly to restrain,
That Just may live, while life doth remain.

INC. Goodman Hobal, speak you in earnest?
What dost thou say, shall the Just bridle me?
No, no, brother Snaps, do the worst and thy best
I will not be bridled of him nor of thee.

JUST. Seeing Sapience consisteth in heavenly document,
And that heavenly document consisteth in Sapience,
To bridle this wretch I cannot but consent,
Sith I of his purpose have had oft intelligence.

INC. Yet again [to] bridle it doth not prevail;
I will not be bridled of the best of you both.
See you this gear? here's one will make you to quail;
Stand back! to kill you, Master Just, I would be loth!
You have been so burned and fried of late,
That it were pity to hurt you any more.
Back, I say, or my dagger shall about your pate,
By the mass, but I will, sir, I'll make your bones sore.
[_Struggle two or three times._

JUST. I will bridle thee, beast, for all thy bragging.

INC. In faith, goodman Just, I'll hold ye wagging;
Nay, brother, ye shall find me a curst colt to bridle,
Nay, in faith, better yet I will make thee to struggle.

SAP. Never leave him, but ensue the counsel of Sapience.

JUST. Lo, now, I have brought him under obedience.
[_Bridle him._

INC. Not so obedient as thou thinkest me to have;
Nay, brother, ye shall find me a coltish knave:
We-he-he, it is good for you to hold fast,
For I will kick and winch, while the life doth last.

SAP. Thou shalt kick indeed, but no victory win;
Neither to conquer the Just to ungodliness nor sin.

INC. O yes, O yes, I will make a proclamation.

JUST. What shall that be?

INC. If ye will give me leave, then you shall see.
O yes! is there any man or woman that hath lost
A gambolling gelding with a grey tail?
Let him come to the crier, and pay for his cost,
And he will tell him tidings without any fail.

SAP. To the intent that you may him sharply restrain,
Let him not enjoy so much of the rein. [_Bridle him shorter._

INC. Cock's soul, now the snaffle cutteth my lip,
I would this lubberly knave had the pip!
I shall leap no hedges while this bridle is on,
Out, alas! I think it will fret me to the bone.

SAP. Thus should every man, that will be called Just,
Bridle and subdue his beastly inclination,
That he in the end may obtain perfect trust,
The messenger of God to give sight to salvation.

JUST. That trust to obtain with him I have struggled.

SAP. Then let us depart, and leave this beast bridled.
[_Go out both._

INC. May the devil go with you and his dun dame!
Such horse-masters will make a colt quickly tame;
I would he were hanged that this snaffle did make,
It maketh my chaps so shamefully to ache;
Ye have no pity on me, you, I see, by your laughing;
I care not greatly, if I fall to gambolling;
We-he-he-he-he-he, come aloft, I say,
Beware the horse-heels, I advise you stand away;
The rein of my bridle is tied so short,
That I cannot make you any more sport.
But though I be bridled now of the Just,
I doubt not but I shall be unbridled by Lust,
And let not Just think but I will rebel,
Although he bridle me ten times all well;
Though Nature saith one doom with a croch,
It will not lie long, but incontinent approach;
Even so, though that I be bridled a while,
The colt will at length the courser beguile.

_Enter_ GREEDY-GUT _running, and catch a fall_.

GRE. Chill run, I, as fast as I can,
Zurs, did none of you zee a man?
Cham zent in haste from my Master Lust,
So that Inclination needs come to him must.

INC. Where is he now? I pray thee, tell me.

GRE. Why, what have we here? Jesus, benedicite!
I hold twenty pound it is Balaam's ass!
Nay 'tis a colt, I see his tail, by the mass!

INC. Am I a colt? nay, thou liest like a knave,
Somewhat for thy labour now shalt thou have.

GRE. Hobal, ho, lousy jade, must ye kick?

INC. Whoever saw such a desperate Dick?
Why Greedy-gut, do'st thou not know Inclination?

GRE. Body of me, who hath drest thee of that fashion?
Thou art bridled for biting now indeed,
Sirrah, Master Lust would have thee make speed.

INC. I am bridled, I, even as thou do'st see,
Therefore desire him to come and help me.
But what is the matter, that he for me sent?

GRE. Marry, together with Greediness now he is bent;
He hath had long talk with Carnal Cogitation,
And is set on fire by the means of Elation,
So that he is so lusty, he cannot abide,
Therefore one or other for him must be spied.

INC. Well, Greedy-gut, I pray thee, go and make haste.

GRE. Tush, fear not, chill spend no time in waste.

INC. I had rather than forty pence that he were come;
If I be bridled long, I shall be undone.
So sharp is this snaffle, called Restraint,
That it maketh me sweat I am so faint:
Hark! I hear the voice of my Master Lust;
Now I shall be unbridled shortly, I trust.

_Enter_ LUST.

LUST. Cock's precious wounds, here hath been villainy.

INC. Eh, they have used me with too much villainy,
That old knave Sapience so counselled Just;
But let me be unbridled, good Master Lust. [_Unbridle him._

LUST. Lo, now thou art unbridled, be of good cheer.

INC. By'r Lady, I am glad I have gotten thus clear.
But hark you, Master Lust, if I may do you pleasure,
Whisper, whisper.

LUST. She is called Treasure.[324]
O, my heart is on fire, till she come in place.

INC. O Master Lust, she hath an amiable face;[325]
A tricker, a trimmer, in faith that she is,
The goddess of wealth, prosperity, and bliss.

LUST. But think you that this minion long endure shall?

INC. For ever and ever, man, she is immortal.
There be many other; but she exceedeth them all.

LUST. What be they, have you their names in store?

INC. Yea, hark, in your ear [_whispers_], and many other more.

LUST. Sith that the apple of Paris before me is cast,
And that I may deliver the same where I will,
I would Prometheus were here to help me hold fast,
That I might have a fore-wit with me ever still.
Pallas, I consider, in science hath skill,
But Juno and Venus good will do I bear;
Therefore to give the apple I know not where.

INC. Be counsell'd by me, and give it Lady Treasure.
It shall be for your commodity in the end without measure,
For having the company of this minion lass,
You shall never want the society of Pallas;
Juno, nor yet the armipotent Mars,
Can not resist your strength, be they never so fierce;
And as for Venus, you shall have [her] at pleasure,
For she is bought and sold always with Treasure;
She of her power hath whole countries conquered,
The most noble champions by her hath been murthered;
Acon for her sake was stoned to death.
Tush, innumerable at this day spend their breath,
Some hang or be hanged, they love her so well,
She is the great goddess, it is true that I tell.

LUST. Which way should I work of her to have a sight?

INC. I, Inclination, will lead you thither right;
But we must have Greedy-gut and also Elation.

LUST. They are at the house of Carnal Cogitation.

INC. Whither I would wish that we might depart;
I will lead you thither with all my heart.

_Enter_ JUST, TRUST, _and_ CONTENTATION.

TRUST, _a woman plainly [apparelled,] and_ CONTENTATION _kneel down and sing, she have a crown_.

_So happy is the state of those
That walk upright and just,
That thou, Lord, dost thy face disclose
By perfect hope and trust.
Their inclination thou dost stay,
And sendeth them Sapience,
That they should serve, and eke obey,
Thy high magnificence.
And sendest Contentation,
That we in thee may rest.
Therefore all adoration
To thee pertaineth best._

JUST. God careth for his, as the prophet doth say,
And preserveth them under his merciful wings;
Namely the just, that his will do obey,
Observing his holy commandment in all things;
Not for our sake or for our deservings,
But for his own sake openly to declare,
That all men on earth ought to live in his fear.

TRUST. How God hath blessed you, all men may see;
For first at your entrance you conquered Lust,
Not by your power, but by might of the deity,
As all persons ought to do that be just.
Then through Sapience, which God did you send,
You bridled that brutish beast Inclination,
And also ordered you with Contentation.

CONT. Those that are contented with their vocation
Be thankful to God; this is a true consequent;
And those that be thankful in their conversation,
Cannot but please the Lord God omnipotent;
But those that be sturdy, proud, and disobedient,
The Ruler of all rulers will them confound,
And rot their remembrance off from the ground.

JUST. When Solon was asked of Croesus the king,
What man was most happy in this vale terrestrial,
To the end he seemeth to attribute that thing
When men be associate with treasures celestial,
Before the end can no man judge, he doth say,
That any man is happy that here beareth breath,
But then by his end prettily judge we may.
Thus true happiness consisteth, saith he, after death.
If this be a truth, as undoubtedly it is,
What men are more foolish, wretched, and miserable,
Than those that in these treasures accompt their whole bliss?
Being infect with ambition, that sickness incurable;
Ah, wicked Adrastia, thou goddess deceivable,
Thus to pluck from men the sense of their mind,
So that no contentation therein they can find.

TRUST. The treasure of this world we may well compare
To Circes the witch with her crafty cautility,
Wherewith many men's minds so poisoned are,
That quite they are carried into all fidelity;
They are conjured indeed, and bewitched so sore,
That treasure is their trust, joy and delight.
True trust is expelled, they pass not therefore,
And against contentation they continually fight.
But though wicked men follow their lust,
Crying, on earth is our felicity and pleasure,
Yet God doth so guide the hearts of the just,
That they respect chiefly the celestial treasure.

CONT. Alas! should we not have that estimation
Which God hath prepared for his dear elect?
Should not our minds rest in full contentation,
Having trust in this treasure, most high in respect?
St Paul, whom the Lord so high did erect,
Saith: It passeth the sense of our memory and mind,
Much less can our outward eyes the same find,
And as for treasures which men possess here,
Through fickleness of fortune soon fadeth away;
The greatest of renown and most worthy peer
Sometime falleth in the end to misery and decay.
Record of Dionysius, a king of much fame,
Of the valiant Alexander and Cæsar the strong.
Record of Tarquinius, which Superbus had to name,
And of Heliogabalus, that ministered with wrong;
If I should recite all, I should stand very long,
But these be sufficient plainly to approve,
How soon by uncertainty this treasure doth remove.

JUST. It is true; therefore a mind well content
Is great riches, as the wise King Solomon doth say.
We have seen of late days this canker pestilent
Corrupting our realm to our great decay--
Ambition, I mean, which chiefly did reign
Among those that should be examples to others;
We saw how their brethren they did disdain,
And burned with fire the child with the mother;
It is often seen that such monsters ambitious,
As spare not to spill the blood of the innocent,
Will not greatly stick to become seditious,
The determination of God thereby to prevent.
God grant every one of us earnestly to repent,
And not to set our minds on this fading treasure,
But rather wish and will to do the Lord's pleasure.

TRUST. O ye emperors, potentates, and princes of renown,
Learn of Just with Trust yourselves to associate.
That like as your vocation by right doth ask the crown,
And also due obedience, being the appointed magistrate,
So rule that at the last you may be resuscitate,
And reign with the Almighty with perfect continuance,
Receiving double crowns for your godly governance.
Ye noblemen, whom God hath furnished with fame,
Be mindful to walk in the ways of the Just,
Add virtue evermore to your honourable name,
And be not overcome of concupiscence or lust.
Flee from love of treasure, catch hold of me, Trust;
And then double felicity at the last you shall possess,
And in all earthly doings God shall give you success.
Ye poor men and commons, walk well in your vocation,
Banish lust and desire, which is not convenient;
Let trust work in you a full contentation,
Considering that it leadeth to treasures more excellent,
For these are uncertain, but they are most permanent.
Your necessity supply with virtue and trust,
And then shall you enjoy your crown among the just.

JUST. As I, being properly nominate Just,
Am here associate with Contentation,
So have I my whole felicity in Trust,
Who illumineth mine eyes to see my salvation.

TRUST. Fear ye not, shortly you shall have consolation,
If I were once grown in you to perfection,
Even thus goeth it always with the children of election.

JUST. I will depart now; will ye go with me, Trust?

TRUST. Yea, I must always associate the Just.

CONT. A psalm of thanksgiving first let us sing,
To the laud and praise of the immortal King.
[_Here, if you will, sing "the man is blest
that feareth God," &c.--Go out._

_Enter_ INCLINATION, _laughing_.

INC. Lust (quod he); now in faith he is lusty,
Lady Treasure and he hath made a match;
He thinketh that I were marvellous trusty,
Because I teach him to claw and to catch,
And nowadays amity doth therein consist;
He that can flatter shall be well beloved;
But he that saith, _thus_ and _thus, saith Christ_,
Shall as an enemy be openly reproved.
Friendship, yea, friendship consisteth now in adulation;
Speak fair and please the lust of thy lord,
I warrant thee be had in great estimation,
When those that tell truth shall be abhorr'd.
Ah, unhappy Lingua, whither wilt thou ren?
Take heed, I advise thee, lest thou be shent;
If ye chance to tell any tales of these gentlewomen,
With flesh-hooks and nails you are like to be rent;
Nay, for the passion of me be not so moved,
And I will please you incontinent again.
Above all treasures you are worthy to be loved,
Because you do no men deride nor disdain;
You do not contemn the simple and poor;
You be not high-minded, proud, and presumptuous,
Neither wanton nor wily you be nevermore,
But gentle, loving modesty, and virtuous,
Behold how a lie can please some folks' diet,
O[r] pacify their minds marvellous well!
All hist, I warrant ye, so they [be] in quiet.
How to please you hereafter now I can tell:
Hark, I hear Lust and my Lady Treasure,
They are given to solace, singing and pleasure.

_Enter_ LUST _and_ TREASURE, _a woman finely appareled_.

LUST. Ah, amorous lady, of beautiful face,
Thou art heartily welcome into this place;
My heart is inclined to thee, Lady Treasure,
My love is insatiate, it keepeth no measure.

TREAS. It is I, Master Lust, that will you advance;
Treasure it is that things doth enhance:
Upon me set your whole affection and lust,
And pass not a point for the ways of the Just.
Treasure is a pleasure, bear that in mind;
Both trusty and true ye shall me always find.

INC. As trusty as is a quick eel by the tail! [_Aside._
What, Lady Treasure, welcome without fail;
To be better acquainted with you once I trust,
But I dare not in the presence of my Master Lust.

[TREAS.] Ye are welcome, sir, heartily; what! be of good courage;
Drawer, let us have a pint of white wine and borage.

LUST. Wherefore, I pray thee tell?

INC. Marry, methink you are not well.

LUST. Not well? who can a better life crave,
Than to possess such a lady as I have?
Is there any wealth not contained in Treasure
Ah, lady, I love thee, in faith, out of measure.

INC. It is out of measure indeed, as you say,
And even so most men love her at this day;
O, she is a minion of amorous hue,
Her peer in my days yet I never knew.
Old (quod you): I am an old knave, I tell ye,
Nay, never laugh at the matter, for doubtless I smell ye;
She passeth Juno, Ceres, and Pallas,
More beautiful than ever dame Venus was,
Othea in sapience she doth exceed,
And Diana in dignity, of whom we do read;
What should fair Helen once named be,
She excelleth all these, Master Lust, believe me.

LUST. How say you, is not this an eloquent lad?

TREAS. That you have such a servant, truly I am glad.

INC. Ha, ha, now indeed I can you not blame,
For women of all degrees are glad of the same;
They that flatter and speak them fair,
Shall be their sons, and peradventure their heir.

LUST. You told me of a brother you had, Lady Treasure.

TREAS. Yea, sir, that I have; his name is called Pleasure;
And seeing you enjoy me now at your will,
Right soon, I am sure, he will come you until.

LUST. Truly of him I would fain have a sight,
For because that in pleasure I have marvellous delight.

INC. Then honesty and profit you may bid good night. [_Aside._

LUST. What say'st thou?

INC. I say he will shortly appear in sight;
I know by his singing the same is he,
[_Aside_] The misbegotten Orpheus I think that he be.

_Enter_ PLEASURE, _singing this song_.

_O happy days and pleasant plays,
Wherein I do delight-a;
I do pretend, till my life's end,
To live still in such plight-a._

INC. Master Pleasure, I perceive you be of good cheer.

PLEAS. What, Inclination, old lad, art thou here?

INC. Yea, sir, and Lady Treasure your sister, also.

PLEAS. Body of me, then unto her I will go.
What, sister, I am glad to meet with you here.

TREAS. Welcome unto me, mine own brother dear.
Master Lust, this is my brother, of whom I told;
He is pleasant and lusty, as you may behold.

LUST. Gentleman (I pray you), is your name Master Pleasure?

PLEAS. Yea, sir, and I am brother to Lady Treasure.

LUST. And are you contented to accompany me?

PLEAS. Whereas she is resident, I must needs be;
Treasure doth Pleasure commonly precede.[326]
But the one is with the other, they have both so decreed.

INC. Marry, now you are well indeed, Master Lust;
This is better, I trow, than the life of the just:
They be compelled to possess contentation,
Having no treasure but trust of salvation.
But my lady your mistress--my mistress, I would say,
She worketh, you may see, to keep you from decay.

LUST. O, madam, in you is all my delight,
And in your brother Pleasure, both day and night.
The _Trial of Treasure_ this is indeed,
I perceive that she is a true friend at need;
For I have proved her, according as Thales doth say,
And I perceive that her beauty cannot decay.

TREAS. Always with you I will be resident,
So that your life shall be most excellent.

PLEAS. Yea, sir, and me Pleasure also you shall have,
So that none other thing there needeth to crave;
I will replenish your heart with delight,
And I will be always with Treasure in sight.
But if you desire to enjoy me at your will,
My sister you must have in reputation still;
And then, as her treasure is certain and excellent,
My pleasure shall be both perfect and permanent.
Credit not those, sir, that talk that and this,
Saying that in two consisteth no bliss.
But let experience your mind ever move,
And see if all men us two do not love.

INC. [_aside._] Love? yes, they love you indeed, without a doubt,
Which shutteth some of them God's kingdom without.
They love you so well, that their God they do hate,
As time hath declared to us even of late.
But he that on such things his study doth cast,
Shall be sure to be deceived at the last.

LUST. What dost thou say?

INC. Of Treasure, forsooth, ye must ever hold fast,
For if you should chance to lose Lady Treasure,
Then farewell in post this gentleman Pleasure.

LUST. My love to them both cannot be express'd,
And especially, my lady, you I love best.

TREAS. If you love me, as you do profess,
Be sure you shall want no kind of wealthiness.

PLEAS. And if you have wealthiness at your own will,
Then will I Pleasure remain with you still.

INC. [_aside._] You are both as constant as snow in the sun,
Which from snow to water through melting doth run;
But worldly-wise men cannot conceive that:
To hunt for such mice they learn of the cat.

LUST. My lady is amorous, and full of favour.

INC. [_aside._] I may say to you she hath an ill-favoured savour.

LUST. What sayest thou?

INC. I say she is loving and of gentle behaviour.

TREAS. And so I will continue still, be you sure.

PLEAS. And I in like case, while your life doth endure.

LUST. Ah trusty Treasure! ah pleasant Pleasure!
All wealth I possess now without measure;
And seeing that the same shall firmly remain,
To help me sing a song will you take the pain?

TREAS. Even with all my heart, begin when ye will.

INC. [_aside._] To it, and I will either help or stand still.

_Sing this Song._

_Am I not in blessed case,
Treasure and Pleasure to possess?
I would not wish no better place,
If I may still have wealthiness:
And to enjoy in perfect peace
My lady, lady.
My pleasant pleasure shall increase,
My dear lady._

_Helen may not compared be,
Nor Cressida that was so bright;
These cannot stain the shine of thee,
Nor yet Minerva of great might.
Thou passest Venus far away,
Lady, lady,
Love thee, I will both night and day,
My dear lady._

_My mouse, my nobs, and coney sweet,
My hope and joy, my whole delight;
Dame Nature may fall at thy feet,
And may yield to thee her crown of right.
I will thy body now embrace,
Lady, lady;
And kiss thy sweet and pleasant face,
My dear lady._

_Enter_ GOD'S VISITATION.

VISIT. I am God's minister, called Visitation,
Which divers and many ways you may understand;
Sometime I bring sickness; sometime perturbation;
Sometime trouble and misery throughout the land;
Sometime I signify God's wrath to be at hand;
Sometime a forerunner of destruction imminent,
But an executor of pain I am at this present.
Thou insipient fool, that hast followed thy lust,
Disdaining the doctrine declared by Sapience,
In Treasure and Pleasure hath been thy trust,
Which thou thoughtest should remain ever in thy presence:
Thou never rememb'red'st Thales his sentence,
Who willeth men in all things to keep a measure,
Especially in love to uncertainty of treasure;
Even now I am come from visiting the Just,
Because God beginneth first with his elect;
But he is so associated and comforted with Trust,
That no kind of impatience his soul can infect.
Contentation in such sort his race doth direct,
That he is contented with God's operation,
Comfortably embracing me his Visitation;
But now I am come to vex thee with pain,
Which makest Treasure thy castle and rock:
Thou shall know that both she and Pleasure is vain,
And that the Almighty thou canst not mock.
Anguish and grief into thee I do cast,
With pain in thy members continually.
Now thou hast pain, thy pleasure cannot last,
But I will expel him incontinently.

LUST. O Cock's heart! what a pestilence is this!
Depart from me, I say, hence, God's Visitation!
Help, help, Lady Treasure, thou goddess of bliss!
At thy hands let me have some consolation.

TREAS. I will remain with you, be out of doubt.

INC. Will ye be packing, you ill-favoured lout?

VISIT. Presently, indeed from him thou shalt not go,
And why? because God's will hath not determined so;
But in time thou, Treasure, shalt be turned to rust.
And as for Pleasure he shall now attend on the Just.

LUST. Gog's wounds! these pangs increase evermore.

INC. And my little finger is spitefully sore;
You will not believe how my heel doth ache.

TREAS. (_to_ VISITATION). Nay, let me alone, your part I will take.
(_To_ LUST) Be of good comfort, while I here remain;
For Pleasure and he shall be parted in twain.

VISIT. It is not meet that he should be participate with Lust,
But rather virtuous, godly and just.

LUST. Remain with me still, Master Pleasure, I say.

PLEAS. Nay, there is no remedy; I must away;
For where God doth punition and pain,
I Pleasure in no case cannot remain.

VISIT. I could in like case separate thy treasure,
But God doth admonish thee by losing thy pleasure.
[_Go out_ VISITATION _and_ PLEASURE.

INC. Farewell, in the devil's name, old lousy lout,
That my master will die I stand in great doubt.
Ho, ho, ho, how is it with you, Master Lust?

LUST. By the flesh of Goliah, yet Treasure is my trust,
Though Pleasure be gone, and I live in pain,
I doubt not but Treasure will fetch him again.

TREAS. Yea, that I will, fear not, and with you remain.

INC. The property of rich men undoubtedly he hath,
Which think with money to pacify God's wrath,
And health at their pleasure to buy and to sell.
How is Master Lust, are you anything well?

LUST. Against this Visitation my heart doth rebel.
Gog's wounds! shall I still in these pangs remain?

TREAS. Fear you not, Master Lust, I will help you again,
Treasure in physic exceedeth Galenus:
Tush! there is no physician but we shall have with us;
To the ease of your body they will you bring,
And therefore I pray you despair in no thing;
Put your trust always in me Lady Treasure,
And I will restore you again unto Pleasure,
For I am the goddess that therein hath power,
Which shall remain perfect unto the last hour.

INC. Yea, yea, Master Lust, be as merry as you may;
Let Treasure be your trust, whosoever say nay.

_Enter_ TIME.

TIME. The ancient Greeks have called me Chronos,
Which in our vulgar tongue signifieth Time;
I am ent'red in presently for a certain purpose--
Even to turn Treasure to rust and to slime,
And Lust, which hath long disdained the Just,
Ensuing his filthy and vile inclination,
Shall immediately be turned to dust,
To the example of all the whole congregation;
For Time bringeth both these matters to pass,
As experience hath taught in every age,
And you shall behold the same in this glass,
As a document both profitable and sage.
Both Lust and Treasure come forth with speed
Into the shop of the most mighty God,
There shall you be beaten to powder indeed,
And for your abusion feel his scourge and rod.

INC. By Saint Mary! then they have made a wise match,
I pretend therefore to leap over the hatch:
Nay, let me depart, sirs; stop me not, I say,
For I must remain, though both these decay. [_Go out._

LUST. Lust from the beginning frequented hath been,
And shall I now turn to nothing for thee?

TREAS. Treasure in all ages hath been beloved,
And shall she from the earth by thee be removed?

TIME. You know that all such things are subject to time;
Therefore me to withstand is no reason nor rhyme;
For like as all things in time their beginning had,
So must all things in time vanish and fade.

LUST. Gog's wounds, let Treasure remain still with me.

TREAS. Yea, let me continue still in my dignity.

TIME. Nay, I must carry you into Vulcan's fire,
Where you shall be tried unto the uttermost.
Seeing Lust against Trust did daily conspire,
To dust he shall turn for all his great boast!
Both of you shall have one rigorous host;
Come therefore with speed, Time cannot tarry:
To the end of your felicity I will you carry.

TREAS. If there be no remedy, then there is no shift.

LUST. He must needs go, that is driven by the devil's drift;
Ah! Cock's precious sides, what fortune is this!
Whither go I now, to misery or bliss? [_Go out._

_Enter_ JUST, _leading_ INCLINATION _in his bridle shackled_.

INC. We--he, he, he, he! ware the horse-heels, I say;
I would the rein were loose, that I might run away.

JUST. Nay, sith thou wilt not spare against me to rebel,
I will not spare, by God's grace, thee to bridle;
All men may see how vile Inclination
Spareth not to put the just to vexation;
Even so may all men learn of me again,
Thy beastly desires to bridle and restrain.

INC. Marry, sir, I am bridled indeed, as you say,
And shackled, I think, for running away;
This snaffle is sharp indeed for the nonce,
And these shackles do chafe my legs to the bones;
And yet will I provoke, spurn and prick,
Rebel, repugn, lash out and kick.
We-he!--

JUST. In the jade's name, are ye so fresh?
This gear, I suppose, will pluck down your flesh.
Nay, soft, thou shalt have a little more pain,
For somewhat shorter now I will tie thy rein.

_Enter_ TRUST _and_ CONSOLATION.

TRUST. Most blessed and happy, I say, are the just,
Even because they restrain their own inclination;
Thou, therefore, that hast made thy treasure of trust,
Behold, I have brought thee here Consolation.

JUST. Now blessed be God of his mercy and grace,
With all my heart and soul I do you embrace.

CON. Consolation is my name, even as Trust hath said,
Which is joy or comfort in this life transitory;
He that possesseth me is of nothing afraid,
But hath a most quiet and peaceable memory.
For I, through Trust, doth show thee the glory
That God hath prepared for them beforehand.
Wherein at the last they shall perfectly stand.

TRUST. Receive this crown of felicity now at this space,
Which shall be made richer at the celestial place.

INC. By'r lady, I would I had such a gay crown.

JUST. Now praised be God for this riches of renown;
Felicity, in this world, the just doth enjoy.

[INC. _aside_.] Namely, when the devil can them not annoy.

[JUST.] The Lord's work this is, who be praised for ever,
Who grant us in his laws still to persever.

CON. Amen, amen!--God give us delight
In his holy covenant both day and night.

TRUST. Our matter is almost brought to an end,
Saving that Inclination in prison must be shut.
Just, carry him forth, that useth to contend,
And see that surely enough he be put.

JUST. That shall be done shortly, by God's grace.

INC. What, soft, I say, me-think ye go a shameful pace;
Was there ever poor colt thus handled before?
Fie upon it, my legs be unreasonably sore;
Well, yet I will rebel, yea, and rebel again,
And though a thousand times you shouldest me restrain.
[_Lead him out._

_Enter_ TIME, _with a similitude of dust and rust_.

TIME. Behold here, how Lust is converted into dust;
This is his image, his wealth and prosperity;
And Treasure in like case is turned to rust,
Whereof this example showeth the verity.
The _Trial of Treasure_ this is, no doubt,
Let all men take heed that trust in the same,
Considering what things I Time bring about,
And quench out the ungodly, their memory and fame.

_Enter_ JUST.

JUST. Why, and is Lust and Treasure converted to this?

TIME. Yea, forsooth.

JUST. What foolish man in them would put trust,
If this be the final end of their bliss?
Much better I commend the life of the just.

CON. So it is, no doubt, for they have consolation,
Possessing felicity even in this place;
I mean, through trust and hope of salvation,
Which setteth out to us God's mercy and grace.

JUST. Let all men consider this good erudition,
And not to put confidence in Lust nor Treasure;
By these two examples receive admonition,
And also of the sudden banishment of Pleasure.

TIME. Remember that Time turneth all things about:
Time is the touchstone the just for to try.
But whereas Lust and Treasure in time is come to nought,
Just, possessing Trust, remaineth constantly.
So that as I Time have revealed their infamy,
So have I showed the consolation and gain,
That the just shall receive that justly do reign.

CON. We will now no longer trouble this audience,
Sith somewhat tedious to you we have been;
Beseeching you to bear all things with patience,
And remember the examples that you have seen.
God grant them to flourish lively and green,
That some of us the better therefore may be,
Amen, amen! I beseech the blessed Trinity.

* * * * *

_Pray for all Estates._

Take heed in time, and note this well,
Be ruled always by counsel.

Learn of the just to lead thy life,
Being free from envy, wrath, and strife:
Presumption, pride, and covetousness,
With all other ungodliness.

Learn of them always to obey
The Lord's precepts, from day to day,
That thou mayest walk, as he doth will,
And labour thy fond affects to kill.

Always subdue thy beastly lust,
And in the Lord put hope and trust;
Bridle thine inclination
By godly conversation.

The counsel of the wise embrace,
The fool's advice do then deface.
Which fast and pray with good delight,
That Adam may be killed quite.

That joy in us may still increase,
That God the Lord may give us peace,
That we may be content with Trust
To have our crown among the just.

FOOTNOTES:

[317] [Probably for the sake of the rhyme, instead of _entendu_,
understood.]

[318] [Following.]

[319] [_i.e._, God's wounds and hearts; the orig. has _hartes_.]

[320] [Intend.]

[321] [Conquer.]

[322] [Samians.]

[323] [Original has Crassus.]

[324] [In the original the hemistich, _She is called Treasure_, is
assigned to Inclination.]

[325] This speech is not assigned to _Inclination_ in the
original.--_Halliwell_ (_Additional Notes_).

[326] [Original has _proceed_.]

LIKE WILL TO LIKE

_EDITIONS._

_An Enterlude Intituled Like wil to like quod the Deuel to the
Colier, very godly and ful of pleasant mirth. Wherin is declared
not onely what punishment followeth those that wil rather followe
licentious liuing, then to esteeme & followe good councel: and what
great benefits and commodities they receiue that apply them vnto
vertuous liuing and good exercises. Made by Vlpian Fulwel.
Imprinted at Lǒdon at the long shop adioyning vnto S. Mildreds
Churche in the Pultrie by Iohn Allde. Anno Domini 1568. 4º. Black
letter._

_A Pleasant Interlude, &c. London. Printed by Edward Allde, &c.
1587. 4º. Black letter._

A copy of the latter is among Garrick's books at the Museum.

Of another production by this writer, not of a dramatic character, an account will be found in Mr Collier's "Bibliographical Catalogue," 1865. "Like will to Like" was Fulwell's only performance in this direction, and is now first reprinted from a copy of the 4to of 1568 in the Malone collection at Oxford. Both editions are of the highest rarity.

THE NAMES OF THE PLAYERS.

_Five may easily play this Interlude._

THE PROLOGUE, }
TOM TOSSPOT, } _For one._
HANKIN HANGMAN, }
TOM COLLIER. }

HANCE, }
VIRTUOUS LIFE, } _For one._
GOD'S PROMISE, }
CUTHBERT CUTPURSE. }

LUCIFER, }
RALPH ROISTER, } _For one._
GOOD FAME, }
SEVERITY. }

PHILIP FLEMING, }
PIERCE PICKPURSE, } _For another._
HONOUR. }

NICHOL NEWFANGLE, _the Vice_.

THE PROLOGUE.

Cicero in his book _De Amicitia_, these words doth express,
Saying nothing is more desirous than like is unto like;
Whose words are most true and of a certainty doubtless:
For the virtuous do not the virtuous' company mislike.
But the vicious do the virtuous' company eschew:
And like will unto like, this is most true.
It is not my meaning your ears for to weary,
With hearkening what is the 'ffect of our matter:
But our pretence[327] is to move you to be merry,
Merrily to speak, meaning no man to flatter.
The name of this matter, as I said whilere,
Is, Like will to Like, quoth the Devil to the Collier.
Sith pithy proverbs in our English tongue doth abound,
Our author thought good such a one for to choose,
As may show good example, and mirth may eke be found,
But no lascivious toys he purposeth for to use.
Herein, as it were in a glass, see you may
The advancement of virtue, of vice the decay:
To what ruin ruffians and roisters are brought;
You may here see of them the final end:
Begging is the best, though that end be nought;
But hanging is worse, if they do not amend.
The virtuous life is brought to honour and dignity:
And at the last to everlasting eternity.
And because divers men of divers minds be,
Some do matters of mirth and pastime require:
Other some are delighted with matters of gravity,
To please all men is our author's chief desire.
Wherefore mirth with measure to sadness[328] is annexed:
Desiring that none here at our matter will be perplexed.
Thus, as I said, I will be short and brief,
Because from this dump you shall relieved be:
And the Devil with the collier, the thief that seeks the thief,
Shall soon make you merry, so shortly you shall see;
And sith mirth for sadness is a sauce most sweet,
Take mirth then with measure, that best sauceth it.

FOOTNOTES:

[327] [Intention.]

[328] [Seriousness.]

LIKE WILL TO LIKE.

[_Here entereth_ NICHOL NEWFANGLE _the Vice, laughing, and hath a
knave of clubs in his hand which, as soon as he speaketh, he
offereth unto one of the men or boys standing by_.

NEW. Ha, ha, ha, ha! now like unto like: it will be none other,
Stoop, gentle knave, and take up your brother.
Why, is it so? and is it even so indeed?
Why then may I say God send us good speed!
And is every one here so greatly unkind,
That I am no sooner out of sight, but quite out of mind?
Marry, this will make a man even weep for woe,
That on such a sudden no man will let me know,
Sith men be so dangerous[329] now at this day:
Yet are women kind worms, I dare well say.
How say you, woman? you that stand in the angle,
Were you never acquainted with Nichol Newfangle?
Then I see Nichol Newfangle is quite forgot,
Yet you will know me anon, I dare jeopard a groat.
Nichol Newfangle is my name, do you not me know?
My whole education to you I shall show.
For first, before I was born, I remember very well,
That my grandsire and I made a journey into hell;
Where I was bound prentice before my nativity
To Lucifer himself, such was my agility.
All kinds of sciences he taught unto me:
That unto the maintenances of pride might best agree.
I learn'd to make gowns with long sleeves and wings:
I learn'd to make ruffs like calves' chitterlings,
Caps, hats, coats, with all kind of apparels,
And especially breeches as big as good barrels.
Shoes, boots, buskins, with many pretty toys:
All kind of garments for men, women, and boys.
Know you me now? I thought that at the last!
All acquaintance from Nichol Newfangle is not pass'd.
Nichol Newfangle was and is, and ever shall be:
And there are but few that are not acquainted with me.
For so soon as my prenticehood was once come out,
I went by and by the whole world about.

[_Here the_ DEVIL _entereth in, but he speaketh not yet_.

_Sancte benedicite_, whom have we here?
Tom Tumbler, or else some dancing bear?
Body of me, it were best go no near:[330]
For ought that I see, it is my godfather Lucifer,
Whose prentice I have been this many a day:
But no more words but mum: you shall hear what he will say.

[_This name_ LUCIFER _must be written on his back and in his breast_.

LU. Ho! mine own boy, I am glad that thou art here!

NEW. He speaketh to you, sir, I pray you come near.
[_Pointing to one standing by._

LU. Nay, thou art even he, of whom I am well apaid.

NEW. Then speak aloof,[331] for to come nigh I am afraid.

LU. Why so, my boy? as though thou diddest never see me.

NEW. Yes, godfather, but I am afraid it is now, as ofttimes it is
with thee;
For if my dame and thou hast been tumbling by the ears,
As oftentimes you do, like a couple of great bears,
Thou carest not whom thou killest in thy raging mind.
Dost thou not remember, since thou didst bruise me behind?
This hole in thy fury didst thou disclose,
That now may a tent be put in, so big as thy nose.
This was, when my dame called thee bottle-nosed knave,
But I am like to carry the mark to my grave.

LU. O my good boy, be not afraid,
For no such thing hath happened, as thou hast said.
But come to me, my boy, and bless thee I will,
And see that my precepts thou do fulfil.

NEW. Well, godfather, if you will say ought to me in this case,
Speak, for in faith I mean not to kneel to that ill face.
If our Lady of Walsingham had no fairer nose and visage,
By the mass, they were fools that would go to her on pilgrimage.

LU. Well, boy, it shall not greatly skill,
Whether thou stand, or whether thou kneel:
Thou knowest what sciences I have thee taught,
Which are able to bring the world to naught.
For thou knowest that through pride from heaven I was cast,
Even unto hell, wherefore see thou make haste.
Such pride through new fashions in men's hearts to show
That those, that use it, may have the like overthrow.
From virtue procure men to set their minds aside,
And wholly employ it to all sin and pride.
Let thy new-fangled fashions bear such a sway,
That a rascal [may] be so proud as he that best may.

NEW. Tush, tush, that is already brought to pass,
For a very skipjack[332] is prouder, I swear by the mass,
And seeketh to go more gayer and more brave,
Than doth a lord, though himself be a knave.

LU. I can thee thank,[333] that so well thou hast play'd the part;
Such as do so, shall soon feel the smart.
Sith thou hast thus done, there remaineth behind,
That thou in another thing show thy right kind.[334]

NEW. Then, good godfather, let me hear thy mind.

LU. Thou knowest I am both proud and arrogant,
And with the proud I will ever be conversant;
I cannot abide to see men, that are vicious,
Accompany themselves with such as be virtuous
Wherefore my mind is, sith thou thy part canst play,
That thou adjoin like to like alway.

NEW. I never loved that well, I swear by this day.

LU. What, my boy?

NEW. Your mind is, sith I fast three meals every Good Friday,
That I eat nothing but onions and leeks alway.

LU. Nay, my mind is, sith thou thy part canst play,
That thou adjoin like to like alway.

NEW. Tush, tush, godfather Devil, for that have thou no care:
Thou knowest that like will to like, quoth the Devil to the Collier.
And thou shalt see, that such match I shall make anon,
That thou shalt say I am thy good-good sweet-sweet godson.

Lu. I will give thee thanks, when thou hast so done.

_Here entereth in the_ COLLIER.

NEW. Well, godfather, no mo words but mum!
For yonder comes the Collier, as seemeth me.
By the mass, he will make a good mate for thee.
[_The_ DEVIL _walketh aside_.
What, old acquaintance, small remembrance?
Welcome to town with a very vengeance!
Now welcome, Tom Collier, give me thy hand:
As very a knave as any in England.

COLL. By mass, god-a-marsy, my vreend Nichol!

NEW. By God, and welcome, gentle Tom Lick-hole!

COLL. Cham glad to zee thee merry, my vreend Nichol.
And how dost nowadays, good Nichol?

NEW. And nothing else but even plain Nichol?

COLL. I pray thee, tell me how dost, good vreend Lick-hole?

NEW. It is turn'd from Nichol to Lick-hole with Tom Collier.
I say no more, Tom, but hold thy nose there.

COLL. Nay, hold thy tongue, Nichol, till my nose doth come,
So thou shalt take part, and I shall take some.

NEW. Well, Tom Collier, let these things pass away;
Tell me what market thou hast made of thy coal to-day?

COLL. To every bushel cha zold but three peck:
Lo, here be the empty zacks on my neck.
Cha beguil'd the whoresons, that of me ha' bought;
But to beguile me was their whole thought.

NEW. But hast thou no conscience in beguiling thy neighbour?

COLL. No, marry, so ich may gain vor my labour,
It is a common trade nowadays, this is plain,
To cut one another's throat for lucre and gain.
A small vau't[335] as the world is now brought to pass.

NEW. Thou art a good fellow, I swear by the mass:
As fit a companion for the devil as may be.
Lo, godfather Devil, this fellow will match with thee.
[_He taketh him by the hand._

LU. And good Tom Collier thou art welcome to me.

COLL. God amarsy, good Devil, cham glad of thy company.

LU. Like will to like, I see very well.

NEW. Godfather, wilt thou dance a little, before thee go home to hell?

LU. I am content, so that Tom Collier do agree.

COLL. I will never refuse (Devil) to dance with thee.

NEW. Then, godfather, name what the dance shall be.

LU. _Tom Collier of Croydon hath sold his coal._

NEW. Why then have at it, by my father's soul!

[NICHOL NEWFANGLE _must have a gittern or some other instrument (if
it may be); but if he have not, they must dance about the place all
three, and sing this song that followeth, which must be done also,
although they have an instrument_.

_The Song._

_Tom Collier of Croydon hath sold his coals,
And made his market to-day;
And now he danceth with the Devil,
For like will to like alway._

_Wherefore let us rejoice and sing,
Let us be merry and glad;
Sith that the Collier and the Devil
This match and dance hath made._

_Now of this dance we make an end
With mirth and eke with joy:
The Collier and the Devil will be
Much like to like alway._

NEW. Ha, ha! marry, this is trim singing,
I had not thought the Devil to be so cunning;
And, by the mass, Tom Collier [is] as good as he:
I see that like with like will ever agree.

COLL. Farewell, Master Devil, vor ich must be gone. [_Exit._

LU. Why, then, farewell my gentle friend Tom.

NEW. Farewell, Tom Collier, a knave be thy comfort!
[_Exit_ TOM COLLIER.
How say'st thou, godfather? is not this trim sport?

LU. Thou art mine own boy; my blessing thou shalt have.

NEW. By my truth, godfather, that blessing I do not crave;
But if you go your way, I will do my diligence
As well in your absence as in your presence.

LU. But thou shalt salute me, ere I go doubtless,
That in thy doings thou may'st have the better success.
Wherefore kneel down and say after me: [_He kneeleth down._
When the devil will have it so, it must needs so be.

NEW. What shall I say, bottle-nosed godfather, canst thou tell?

LU. All hail, O noble prince of hell!

NEW. All my dame's cows' tail[s] fell down in the well.

LU. I will exalt thee above the clouds.

NEW. I will salt thee, and hang thee in the shrouds.

LU. Thou art the enhancer of my renown.

NEW. Thou art Hance, the hangman of Calais town.

LU. To thee be honour alone.

NEW. To thee shall come our hobbling Jone.

LU. Amen.

NEW. Amen.

LU. Now farewell, my boy, farewell heartily,
Is there never a knave here will keep the Devil company?

NEW. Farewell, godfather, for thou must go alone:
I pray thee come hither again anon. [_Exit_ LUCIFER.
Marry, here was a benediction of the Devil's good grace:
Body of me, I was so afraid, I was like to bestench the place!
My buttocks made buttons of the new fashion,
While the whoreson Devil was making his salutation.
But, by mass, I am so glad as ever was madge mare,
That the whoreson Devil is joined with the knave Collier.
As fit a match as ever could be pick'd out,
What sayst thou to it, Jone with the long snout?
[TOM TOSSPOT _cometh in with a feather in his hat_.

But who comes yonder puffing, as hot as a black pudding.
I hold twenty pound it is a ruffian, if a goose go a-gooding.

TOM. Gog's heart and his guts, is not this too bad?
Blood, wounds, and nails! it will make a man mad.