Chapter LXXVIII: Act V: SCENE Ia.2761

_Enter_ BILIOSO _and_ PASSARELLO.

_Bil._ Fool, how dost thou like my calf in a long stocking?

_Pass._ An excellent calf, my lord.

_Bil._ This calf hath been a reveller this twenty year. When Monsieur
Gundi lay here ambassador, (5) I could have carried a lady up and
down at arm’s end in a platter; and I can tell you, there were those
at that time who, to try the strength of a man’s back and his arm,
would be coistered.[2762] I have measured calves with (10) most of
the palace, and they come nothing near me; besides, I think there
be not many armours in the arsenal will fit me, especially for the
headpiece. I’ll tell thee—

_Pass._ What, my lord? 15

_Bil._ I can eat stewed broth as it comes seething off the fire; or
a custard as it comes reeking out of the oven; and I think there are
not many lords can do it. A good pomander,[2763] a little decayed in
the scent; but six grains of musk, (20) ground with rose-water, and
tempered with a little civet, shall fetch her again presently.

_Pass._ O, ay, as a bawd with aqua-vitae.

_Bil._ And, what, dost thou rail upon the ladies as thou wert wont? 25

_Pass._ I were better roast a live cat, and might do it with more
safety. I am as secret to [the] thieves as their painting. There ’s
Maquerelle, oldest bawd and a perpetual beggar—did you never hear of
her trick to be known in the (30) city?

_Bil._ Never.

_Pass._ Why, she gets all the picture-makers to draw her picture;
when they have done, she most courtly finds fault with them one after
(35) another, and never fetcheth them. They, in revenge of this,
execute her in pictures as they do in Germany, and hang her in their
shops. By this means is she better known to the stinkards[2764] than
if she had been five times carted. 40

_Bil._ ’Fore God, an excellent policy.

_Pass._ Are there any revels to-night, my lord?

_Bil._ Yes.

_Pass._ Good my lord, give me leave to break a fellow’s pate that
hath abused me. 45

_Bil._ Whose pate?

_Pass._ Young Ferrardo, my lord.

_Bil._ Take heed, he’s very valiant; I have known him fight eight
quarrels in five days, believe it. 50

_Pass._ O, is he so great a quarreller? Why, then, he’s an arrant
coward.

_Bil._ How prove you that?

_Pass._ Why, thus. He that quarrels seeks to fight; and he that seeks
to fight seeks to (55) die; and he that seeks to die seeks never to
fight more; and he that will quarrel, and seeks means never to answer
a man more, I think he ’s a coward.

_Bil._ Thou canst prove anything. 60

_Pass._ Anything but a rich knave; for I can flatter no man.

_Bil._ Well, be not drunk, good fool: I shall see you anon in the
presence. _Exeunt._]

SCENE I.[2765]

_Enter, from opposite sides_, MALEVOLE _and_ MAQUERELLE, _singing_.

_Mal._ “The Dutchman for a drunkard,”—

_Maq._ “The Dane for golden locks,”—

_Mal._ “The Irishman for usquebaugh,”—

_Maq._ “The Frenchman for the ( ).”

_Mal._ O, thou art a blessed creature! Had (5) I a modest woman to
conceal, I would put her to thy custody; for no reasonable creature
would ever suspect her to be in thy company. Ah, thou art a melodious
Maquerelle,—thou picture of a woman, and substance of a beast!

[[2766] _Enter_ PASSARELLO _with wine_.

_Maq._ O fool, will ye be ready anon to go (11) with me to the
revels? The hall will be so pestered[2767] anon.

_Pass._ Ay, as the country is with attorneys.

_Mal._ What hast thou there, fool? 15

_Pass._ Wine; I have learned to drink since I went with my lord
ambassador: I ’ll drink to the health of Madam Maquerelle,

_Mal._ Why, thou wast wont to rail upon her.

_Pass._ Ay; but since I borrowed money of (20) her, I ’ll drink
to her health now; as gentlemen visit brokers, or as knights send
venison to the city, either to take up more money, or to procure
longer forbearance.

_Mal._ Give me the bowl. I drink a health (25) to Altofront, our
deposed duke. [_Drinks._]

_Pass._ I’ll take it [_drinks_]:—so. Now I ’ll begin a health to
Madam Maquerelle. [_Drinks._]

_Mal._ Pooh! I will not pledge her.

_Pass._ Why, I pledged your lord. 30

_Mal._ I care not.

_Pass._ Not pledge Madam Maquerelle! Why, then, will I spew up your
lord again with this fool’s finger.

_Mal._ Hold; I ’ll take it. [_Drinks._]

_Maq._ Now thou hast drunk my health, (36) fool, I am friends with
thee.

_Pass._ Art? art?
When Griffon[2768] saw the reconciled quean
Offering about his neck her arms to cast, 40
He threw off sword and heart’s malignant spleen,[2769]
And lovely her below the loins embrac’d.—
Adieu, Madam Maquerelle. _Exit._]

_Mal._ And how dost thou think o’ this transformation of state now? 45

_Maq._ Verily, very well; for we women always note, the falling of
the one is the rising of the other; some must be fat, some must
be lean; some must be fools, and some must be lords; some must be
knaves, and some must be officers; some (50) must be beggars, some
must be knights; some must be cuckolds, and some must be citizens. As
for example, I have two court-dogs, the most fawning curs, the one
called Watch, the other Catch: now I, like Lady Fortune, sometimes
love this dog, sometimes raise that (56) dog, sometimes favour Watch,
most commonly fancy Catch. Now, that dog which I favour I feed; and
he ’s so ravenous, that what I give he never chaws it, gulps it down
whole, without any relish of what he has, but with a greedy 61
expectation of what he shall have. The other dog now—

_Mal._ No more dog, sweet Maquerelle, no more dog. And what hope hast
thou of the (65) Duchess Maria? Will she stoop to the duke’s lure?
Will she come, thinkest?

_Maq._ Let me see, where ’s the sign now? Ha’ ye e’er a calendar?
Where ’s the sign, trow you? 70

_Mal._ Sign! why is there any moment in that?

_Maq._ O, believe me, a most secret power: look ye, a Chaldean or an
Assyrian, I am sure ’t was a most sweet Jew, told me, court any woman
in the right sign, you shall not miss. But you must take her in the
right vein (76) then; as, when the sign is in Pisces, a fishmonger’s
wife is very sociable; in Cancer, a precisian’s wife is very
flexible; in Capricorn, a merchant’s wife hardly holds out; in Libra,
a lawyer’s wife is very tractable, especially if (81) her husband be
at the term; only in Scorpio ’t is very dangerous meddling. Has the
duke sent any jewel, any rich stones?

_Enter_ CAPTAIN.

_Mal._ Ay, I think those are the best signs to (85) take a lady
in. By your favour, signior, I must discourse with the Lady Maria,
Altofront’s duchess; I must enter for the duke.

_Capt._ She here shall give you interview. I (89) received the
guardship of this citadel from the good Altofront, and for his use
I’ll keep ’t, till I am of no use.

_Mal._ Wilt thou? O heavens, that a Christian should be found in
a buff-jerkin! Captain Conscience, I love thee, captain. (_Exit_
Captain.) (95) We attend. And what hope hast thou of this duchess’
easiness?

_Maq._ ’T will go hard, she was a cold creature ever; she hated
monkeys, fools, jesters, (99) and gentlemen-ushers extremely; she
had the vile trick on ’t, not only to be truly modestly honourable
in her own conscience, but she would avoid the least wanton carriage
that might incur suspect; as, God bless me, she had almost brought
bed-pressing out of fashion; I (105) could scarce get a fine for the
lease of a lady’s favour once in a fortnight.

_Mal._ Now, in the name of immodesty, how many maidenheads has thou
brought to the block? 110

_Maq._ Let me see: heaven forgive us our misdeeds!—Here’s the
duchess.

SCENE II.[2770]

[_To them_] _enter_ MARIA _with_ Captain.

_Mal._ God bless thee, lady!

_Maria._ Out of thy company!

_Mal._ We have brought thee tender of a husband.

_Maria._ I hope I have one already. 5

_Maq._ Nay, by mine honour, madam, as good ha’ ne’er a husband as a
banished husband; he’s in another world now. I ’ll tell ye, lady, I
have heard of a sect that maintained, when the husband was asleep the
wife might lawfully (10) entertain another man, for then her husband
was as dead; much more when he is banished.

_Maria._ Unhonest creature! 14

_Maq._ Pish, honesty is but an art to seem so:
Pray ye, what ’s honesty, what ’s constancy,
But fables feign’d, odd old fools’ chat, devis’d
By jealous fools to wrong our liberty?

_Mal._ Molly, he that loves thee is a duke, Mendoza; he will maintain
thee royally, love (20) thee ardently, defend thee powerfully, marry
thee sumptuously, and keep thee in despite of Rosicleer[2771] or
Donzel del Phebo. There’s jewels: if thou wilt, so; if not, so.

_Maria._ Captain, for God’s love, save poor wretchedness 25
From tyranny of lustful insolence!
Enforce me in the deepest dungeon dwell,
Rather than here; here round about is hell.—
O my dear’st Altofront! where’er thou breathe,
Let my soul sink into the shades beneath, 30
Before I stain thine honour! ’T is[2772] thou has ’t,
And long as I can die, I will live chaste.

_Mal._ ’Gainst him that can enforce how vain is strife!

_Maria._ She that can be enforc’d has ne’er a knife:
She that through force her limbs with lust enrolls, 35
Wants Cleopatra’s asps and Portia’s coals.
God amend you! _Exit with_ Captain.

_Mal._ Now, the fear of the devil for ever go with thee!—Maquerelle,
I tell thee, I have found an honest woman: faith, I perceive, 40
when all is done, there is of women, as of all other things, some
good, most bad; some saints, some sinners, for as nowadays no
courtier but has his mistress, no captain but has his cockatrice, 44
no cuckold but has his horns, and no fool but has his feather;
even so, no woman but has her weakness and feather too, no sex but
has his—I can hunt the letter no farther.—(_Aside._) O God, how
loathsome this toying is to me! That (49) a duke should be forced to
fool it! Well, _stultorum plena sunt omnia:_[2773] better play the
fool lord than be the fool lord.—Now, where’s your sleights, Madam
Maquerelle?

_Maq._ Why, are ye ignorant that ’t is said a squeamish affected
niceness is natural to (55) women, and that the excuse of their
yielding is only, forsooth, the difficult obtaining? You must put her
to ’t: women are flax, and will fire in a moment.

_Mal._ Why, was the flax put into thy mouth, and yet thou— 60
Thou set fire, thou inflame her!

_Maq._ Marry, but I’ll tell ye now, you were too hot.

_Mal._ The fitter to have inflamed the flax, woman. 65

_Maq._ You were too boisterous, spleeny, for, indeed—

_Mal._ Go, go, thou art a weak pandress; now I see,
Sooner earth’s fire heaven itself shall waste, 69
Than all with heat can melt a mind that’s chaste.
Go; thou the duke’s lime-twig! I’ll make the duke turn thee out of
thine office: what, not get one touch of hope, and had her at such
advantage! 74

_Maq._ Now, o’ my conscience, now I think in my discretion, we did
not take her in the right sign; the blood was not in the true vein,
sure. _Exit._

SCENE III.

[_Enter_[2774] BILIOSO.

_Bil._ Make way there! The duke returns from the
enthronement.—Malevole—

_Mal._ Out, rogue!

_Bil._ Malevole,—

_Mal._ “Hence, ye gross-jawed, peasantly (5)—out, go!”[2775]

_Bil._ Nay, sweet Malevole, since my return I hear you are become
the thing I always prophesied would be,—an advanced virtue, a
worthily-employed faithfulness, a man o’ grace, (10) dear friend.
Come; what! _Si quoties peccant homines_[2776]—if as often as
courtiers play the knaves, honest men should be angry—why, look ye,
we must collogue[2777] sometimes, forswear sometimes. 15

_Mal._ Be damned sometimes.

_Bil._ Right: _nemo omnibus horis sapit_; “no man can be honest at
all hours:” necessity often depraves virtue.

_Mal._ I will commend thee to the duke. 20

_Bil._ Do: let us be friends, man.

_Mal._ And knaves, man.

_Bil._ Right: let us prosper and purchase: our lordships shall live,
and our knavery be forgotten. 25

_Mal._ He that by any ways gets riches, his means never shames him.

_Bil._ True.

_Mal._ For impudency and faithlessness are the main stays to
greatness. 30

_Bil._ By the Lord, thou art a profound lad.

_Mal._ By the Lord, thou art a perfect knave: out, ye ancient
damnation!

_Bil._ Peace, peace! and thou wilt not be a friend to me as I am a
knave, be not a knave to me as I am thy friend, and disclose me.
Peace! cornets!] 37

_Enter_ PREPASSO _and_ FERRARDO, two Pages _with lights_, CELSO _and_ EQUATO, MENDOZA _in duke’s robes_, _and_ GUERRINO.

_Men._ On, on; leave us, leave us.
_Exeunt all saving_ MALEVOLE [_and_ MENDOZA].
Stay, where is the hermit?

_Mal._ With Duke Pietro, with Duke Pietro. 40

_Men._ Is he dead? Is he poisoned?

_Mal._ Dead, as the duke is.

_Men._ Good, excellent: he will not blab: secureness lives in
secrecy. Come hither, come hither. 45

_Mal._ Thou hast a certain strong villainous scent about thee my
nature cannot endure.

_Men._ Scent, man! What returns Maria, what answer to our suit?

_Mal._ Cold, frosty; she is obstinate. 50

_Men._ Then she’s but dead; ’t is resolute, she dies:
“Black deed only through black deed safely flies.”

_Mal._ Pooh! _per scelera semper sceleribus tutum est iter_.[2778]

_Men._ What, art a scholar? Art a politician? Sure, thou art an
arrant knave. 56

_Mal._ Who, I? I ha’ been twice an under-sheriff, man.[2779]
[Well, I will go rail upon some great man, that I may purchase the
bastinado, or else go marry some rich Genoan lady, and instantly go
travel.

_Men._ Travel, when thou art married? 62

_Mal._ Ay, ’t is your young lord’s fashion to do so, though he was
so lazy, being a bachelor, that he would never travel so far as the
university: (65) yet, when he married her, tales off, and, Catso, for
England!

_Men._ And why for England?

_Mal._ Because there is no brothel-houses there.

_Men._ Nor courtesans? 70

_Mal._ Neither; your whore went down with the stews, and your punk
came up with your puritan.]

_Men._ Canst thou empoison? Canst thou empoison? 75

_Mal._ Excellently; no Jew, ’pothecary, or politician better. Look
ye, here’s a box: whom wouldst thou empoison? Here’s a box (_giving
it_), which, opened and the fume ta’en up in conduits thorough which
the brain purges itself, (80) doth instantly for twelve hours’ space
bind up all show of life in a deep senseless sleep: here’s another
(_giving it_), which, being opened under the sleeper’s nose, chokes
all the pores of life, kills him suddenly. 85

_Men._ I’ll try experiments; ’t is good not to be deceived.—So, so;
catso!
_Seems to poison_ MALEVOLE [_who falls_].
Who would fear that may destroy?
Death hath no teeth nor tongue;
And he that’s great, to him are slaves, 90
Shame, murder, fame, and wrong.—
Celso!

_Enter Celso_.

_Celso._ My honour’d lord?

_Men._ The good Malevole, that plain-tongu’d man,
Alas, is dead on sudden, wondrous strangely!
He held in our esteem good place. Celso, 96
See him buried, see him buried.

_Celso._ I shall observe ye.

_Men._ And, Celso, prithee, let it be thy care to-night
To have some pretty show, to solemnize 100
Our high instalment; some music, masquery.
We’ll give fair entertain unto Maria,
The duchess to the banish’d Altofront:
Thou shalt conduct her from the citadel
Unto the palace. Think on some masquery. 105

_Celso._ Of what shape, sweet lord?

_Men._ What[2780] shape! Why, any quick-done fiction;
As some brave spirits of the Genoan dukes,
To come out of Elysium, forsooth,
Led in by Mercury, to gratulate 110
Our happy fortune; some such anything,
Some far-fet trick good for ladies, some stale toy
Or other, no matter, so ’t be of our devising.
Do thou prepare ’t; ’t is but for fashion sake.
Fear not, it shall be grac’d, man, it shall take.

_Celso._ All service. 116

_Men._ All thanks; our hand shall not be close[2781] to thee; farewell.
(_Aside._) Now is my treachery secure, nor can we fall:
Mischief that prospers, men do virtue call.
I’ll trust no man: he that by tricks gets wreaths 120
Keeps them with steel; no man securely breathes
Out of deserved ranks; the crowd will mutter, “fool!”
Who cannot bear with spite, he cannot rule.
The chiefest secret for a man of state
Is, to live senseless of a strengthless hate. _Exit._

_Mal._ (_starts up and speaks._) Death of the (126) damned thief!
I’ll make one i’ the masque; thou shalt ha’ some brave spirits of the
antique dukes.

_Celso._ My lord, what strange delusion? 130

_Mal._ Most happy, dear Celso, poisoned with an empty box: I’ll give
thee all, anon. My lady comes to court; there is a whirl of fate
comes tumbling on; the castle’s captain stands for me, the people
pray for me, and the (135) great leader of the just stands for me:
then courage, Celso;
For no disastrous chance can ever move him
That leaveth[2782] nothing but a God above him. _Exeunt._

[SCENE IV.][2783]

_Enter_ BILIOSO _and_ PREPASSO, two Pages _before them_; MAQUERELLE, BIANCA, _and_ EMILIA.

_Bil._ Make room there, room for the ladies! Why, gentlemen, will
not ye suffer the ladies to be entered in the great chamber? Why,
gallants! and you, sir, to drop your torch where the beauties must
sit too? 5

_Pre._ And there’s a great fellow plays the knave; why dost not
strike him?

_Bil._ Let him play the knave, o’ God’s name; thinkest thou I have no
more wit than to strike a great fellow?—The music! more lights! 10
revelling-scaffolds! do you hear? Let there be oaths enow ready at
the door, swear out the devil himself. Let’s leave the ladies, and go
see if the lords be ready for them.

_Exeunt_ BILIOSO, PREPASSO, _and_ Pages.

_Maq._ And, by my troth, beauties, why do (15) you not put you into
the fashion? This is a stale cut; you must come in fashion: look
ye, you must be all felt, felt and feather, a felt upon your bare
hair. Look ye, these tiring things[2784] are justly out of request
now: and, do ye (20) hear? you must wear falling-bands,[2785] you
must come into the falling fashion: there is such a deal o’ pinning
these ruffs, when the fine clean fall is worth all: and again, if ye
should chance to take a nap in the afternoon, your falling-band 25
requires no poting-stick[2786] to recover his form: believe me, no
fashion to the falling, I say.

_Bian._ And is not Signior St. Andrew a gallant fellow now. 30

_Maq._ By my maidenhead, la, honour and he agree as well together as
a satin suit and woollen stockings.

_Emilia._ But is not Marshal Make-room, my servant in reversion, a
proper gentleman? 35

_Maq._ Yes, in reversion, as he had his office; as, in truth, he
hath all things in reversion: he has his mistress in reversion, his
clothes in reversion, his wit in reversion; and, indeed, is a suitor
to me for my dog in reversion: but, (40) in good verity, la, he is as
proper a gentleman in reversion as—and, indeed, as fine a man as may
be, having a red beard and a pair of warpt legs.

_Bian._ But, i’ faith, I am most monstrously in love with Count
Quidlibet-in-quodlibet: (45) is he not a pretty, dapper, unidle[2787]
gallant?

_Maq._ He is even one of the most busy-fingered lords: he will put
the beauties to the squeak most hideously.

_Re-enter_ BILIOSO.

_Bil._ Room! make a lane there! the duke (50) is entering: stand
handsomely for beauty’s sake, take up the ladies there! So, cornets,
cornets!

SCENE V.

_Re-enter_ PREPASSO, _joins to_ BILIOSO; _then enter_ two Pages _with lights_, FERRARDO, MENDOZA; _at the other door_, two Pages _with lights_, _and the_ Captain _leading in_ MARIA; MENDOZA _meets_ MARIA _and closeth with her_; _the rest fall back_.

_Men._ Madam, with gentle ear receive my suit;
A kingdom’s safety should o’er-peise[2788] slight rites;
Marriage is merely nature’s policy:
Then, since unless our royal beds be join’d,
Danger and civil tumults fright the state, 5
Be wise as you are fair, give way to fate.

_Maria._ What wouldst thou, thou affliction to our house?
Thou ever-devil, ’t was thou that banished’st
My truly noble lord!

_Men._ I! 10

_Maria._ Ay, by thy plots, by thy black stratagems.
Twelve moons have suffer’d change since I beheld
The loved presence of my dearest lord.
O thou far worse than Death! he parts but soul
From a weak body; but thou soul from soul 15
Dissever’st, that which God’s own hand did knit;
Thou scant of honour, full of devilish wit!

_Men._ We’ll check your too-intemperate lavishness:
I can and will.

_Maria._ What canst? 20

_Men._ Go to; in banishment thy husband dies.

_Maria._ He ever is at home that’s ever wise.

_Men._ You ’st ne’er meet more: reason should love control.

_Maria._ Not meet! 24
She that dear loves, her love ’s still in her soul.

_Men._ You are but a woman, lady, you must yield.

_Maria._ O, save me, thou innated bashfulness,
Thou only ornament of woman’s modesty!

_Men._ Modesty! death, I’ll torment thee. 29

_Maria._ Do, urge all torments, all afflictions try;
I’ll die my lord’s as long as I can die.

_Men._ Thou obstinate, thou shall die.—Captain, that lady’s life
Is forfeited to justice: we have examin’d her,
And we do find she hath empoisoned 34
The reverend hermit; therefore we command
Severest custody.—Nay, if you’ll do ’s no good,
You ’st do ’s no harm: a tyrant’s peace is blood.

_Maria._ O, thou art merciful; O gracious devil,
Rather by much let me condemned be 39
For seeming murder than be damn’d for thee!
I’ll mourn no more; come, girt my brows with flowers:
Revel and dance, soul, now thy wish thou hast;
Die like a bride, poor heart, thou shalt die chaste.

_Enter_ AURELIA _in mourning habit_.

_Aur._ “Life is a frost of cold felicity,[2789]
And death the thaw of all our vanity:”[2790] 45
Was’t not an honest priest that wrote so?

_Men._ Who let her in?

_Bil._ Forbear!

_Pre._ Forbear!

_Aur._ Alas, calamity is everywhere: 50
Sad misery, despite your double doors,
Will enter even in court.

_Bil._ Peace!

_Aur._ I ha’ done.

_Bil._[2791] One word,—take heed! 55

_Aur._ I ha’ done.

_Enter_ MERCURY _with loud music_.

_Mer._ Cyllenian Mercury, the god of ghosts,
From gloomy shades that spread the lower coasts,[2792]
Calls four high-famed Genoan dukes to come,
And make this presence their Elysium, 60
To pass away this high triumphal night
With song and dances, court’s more soft delight.

_Aur._ Are you god of ghosts? I have a suit pending in hell betwixt
me and my conscience; would fain have thee help me to an advocate.

_Bil._ Mercury shall be your lawyer, lady. 66

_Aur._ Nay, faith. Mercury has too good a face to be a right lawyer.

_Pre._ Peace, forbear! Mercury presents the masque.

_Cornets_: _the song to the cornets, which playing, the masque enters_; MALEVOLE, PIETRO, FERNEZE, _and_ CELSO, _in white robes, with duke’s crowns upon laurel wreaths, pistolets and short swords under their robes_.

_Men._ Celso, Celso, court Maria for our love.—
Lady, be gracious, yet grace. 71

_Maria._ With me, sir?
MALEVOLE _takes_ MARIA _to dance_.

_Mal._ Yes, more loved than my breath;
With you I’ll dance.

_Maria._ Why, then, you dance with death.
But, come, sir, I was ne’er more apt for mirth.
Death gives eternity a glorious breath: 75
O, to die honour’d, who would fear to die?

_Mal._ They die in fear who live in villainy.

_Men._ Yes, believe him, lady, and be rul’d by him.

_Pietro._ Madam, with me.
PIETRO _takes_ AURELIA _to dance_.

_Aur._ Wouldst, then, be miserable? 80

_Pietro._ I need not wish.

_Aur._ O, yet forbear my hand! away! fly! fly!
O, seek not her that only seeks to die!

_Pietro._ Poor loved soul!

_Aur._ What, wouldst court misery? 85

_Pietro._ Yes.

_Aur._ She’ll come too soon:—O my grieved heart!

_Pietro._ Lady, ha’ done, ha’ done:
Come, let us dance: be once from sorrow free.

_Aur._ Art a sad man? 90

_Pietro._ Yes, sweet.

_Aur._ Then we’ll agree.

FERNEZE _takes_ MAQUERELLE _and_ CELSO, BIANCA: _then the cornets sound the measure, one change and rest._

_Fer._ (_to_ BIANCA.) Believe it, lady; shall I swear? Let me enjoy
you in private, and I’ll marry you, by my soul. 95

_Bian._ I had rather you would swear by your body: I think that would
prove the more regarded oath with you.

_Fer._ I’ll swear by them both, to please you.

_Bian._ O, damn them not both to please (100) me, for God’s sake!

_Fer._ Faith, sweet creature, let me enjoy you to-night, and I’ll
marry you to-morrow fortnight, by my troth, la.

_Maq._ On his troth, la! believe him not; (105) that kind of
cony-catching[2793] is as stale as Sir Oliver Anchovy’s perfumed
jerkin: promise of matrimony by a young gallant, to bring a virgin
lady into a fool’s paradise; make her a great woman, and then cast
her off;—’t is as common (110) [and][2794] natural to a courtier, as
jealousy to a citizen, gluttony to a puritan, wisdom to an alderman,
pride to a tailor, or an empty hand-basket to one of these six-penny
damnations: of his troth, la! believe him not; traps to (115) catch
pole-cats.

_Mal._ (_to_ MARIA.) Keep your face constant, let no sudden passion
Speak in your eyes.

_Maria._ O my Altofront!

_Pietro._ (_to_ AURELIA.) A tyrant’s jealousies
Are very nimble: you receive it all? 121

_Aur._ My heart, though not my knees, doth humbly fall
Low as the earth, to thee.

[_Mal._][2795] Peace! next change; no words.

_Maria._ Speech to such, ay, O, what will affords! 125
_Cornets sound the measure over again; which danced, they unmask._

_Men._ Malevole!
_They environ_ MENDOZA, _bending their pistols on him_.

_Mal._ No.

_Men._ Altofront! Duke Pietro! Ferneze! ha!

_All._ Duke Altofront! Duke Altofront!
_Cornets, a flourish._—_They seize upon_ MENDOZA.

_Men._ Are we surpris’d? What strange delusions mock 130
Our senses? Do I dream? or have I dreamt
This two days’ space? Where am I?

_Mal._ Where an arch-villain is.

_Men._ O, lend me breath till I am fit to die!
For peace with heaven, for your own souls’ sake,
Vouchsafe me life! 136

_Pietro._ Ignoble villain! whom neither heaven nor hell,
Goodness of God or man, could once make good!

_Mal._ Base, treacherous wretch! what grace canst thou expect,
That hast grown impudent in gracelessness? 140

_Men._ O, life!

_Mal._ Slave, take thy life.
Wert thou defenced, th(o)rough blood and wounds,
The sternest horror of a civil fight, 144
Would I achieve thee; but prostrate at my feet,
I scorn to hurt thee: ’t is the heart of slaves
That deigns to triumph over peasants’ graves;
For such thou art, since birth doth ne’er enroll
A man ’mong monarchs, but a glorious soul.
[[2796] O, I have seen strange accidents of state! 150
The flatterer, like the ivy, clip the oak,
And waste it to the heart; lust so confirm’d,
That the black act of sin itself not sham’d
To be term’d courtship.
O, they that are as great as be their sins, 155
Let them remember that th’ inconstant people
Love many princes merely for their faces
And outward shows; and they do covet more
To have a sight of these than of their virtues.
Yet thus much let the great ones still conceive,[2797]
When they observe not heaven’s impos’d conditions, 161
They are no kings, but forfeit their commissions.

_Maq._ O good my lord. I have lived in the court this twenty year:
they that have been old courtiers, and come to live in the city, they
(165) are spited at, and thrust to the walls like apricocks, good my
lord.

_Bil._ My lord, I did know your lordship in this disguise; you heard
me ever say, if Altofront did return, I would stand for him: 170
besides, ’t was your lordship’s pleasure to call me wittol and
cuckold: you must not think, but that I knew you, I would have put it
up so patiently.]

_Mal._ You o’er-joy’d spirits, wipe your long-wet eyes.
_To_ PIETRO _and_ AURELIA.
Hence with this man (_kicks out_ MENDOZA): an eagle takes not
flies. 176
You to your vows (_to_ PIETRO _and_ AURELIA):
and thou into the suburbs.[2798] _To_ MAQUERELLE.
You to my worst friend I would hardly give;
Thou art a perfect old knave (_to_ BILIOSO): all-pleas’d live
You two unto my breast (_to_ CELSO _and the_ Captain): thou to my
heart. (_To_ MARIA.) The rest of idle actors idly part: 181
And as for me, I here assume my right.
To which I hope all’s pleas’d: to all, goodnight.
_Cornets, a flourish. Exeunt omnes._

AN IMPERFECT ODE, BEING BUT ONE STAFF

SPOKEN BY THE PROLOGUE.

To wrest each hurtless thought to private sense
Is the foul use of ill-bred impudence:
Immodest censure now grows wild,
All over-running.
Let innocence be ne’er so chaste, 5
Yet to the last
She is defil’d
With too nice-brained cunning.
O you of fairer soul,
Control 10
With an Herculean arm
This harm;
And once teach all old freedom of a pen,
Which still must write of fools, whiles ’t writes of men!

EPILOGUS

Your modest silence, full of heedy stillness,
Makes me thus speak: a voluntary illness
Is merely[2799] senseless; but unwilling error,
Such as proceeds from too rash youthful fervour,
May well be call’d a fault, but not a sin: 5
Rivers take names from founts where they begin.
Then let not too severe an eye peruse
The slighter brakes[2800] of our reformed Muse,
Who could herself herself of faults detect,
But that she knows ’t is easy to correct, 10
Though some men’s labour: troth, to err is fit,
As long as wisdom’s not profess’d, but wit.
Then till another’s[2801] happier Muse appears,
Till his Thalia feast your learned ears,
To whose desertful lamps pleased Fates impart
Art above nature, judgment above art, 16
Receive this piece, which hope nor fear yet daunteth:
He that knows most knows most how much he wanteth.

A WOMAN KILLED WITH KINDNESS

BY THOMAS HEYWOOD

[DRAMATIS PERSONAE

SIR FRANCIS ACTON, Brother to Mistress Frankford.
SIR CHARLES MOUNTFORD.
MASTER JOHN FRANKFORD.
MASTER MALBY, friend to Sir Francis.
MASTER WENDOLL, friend to Frankford.
MASTER CRANWELL.
MASTER SHAFTON, false friend to Sir Charles.
OLD MOUNTFORD, Uncle to Sir Charles.
MASTER SANDY.
MASTER RODER.
MASTER TIDY, Cousin to Sir Charles.
NICHOLAS, ROGER BRICKBAT, } Household Servants to
JENKIN, JACK SLIME, } Frankford.
SPIGOT, Butler, }
Sheriff.
Keeper of Prison.
Sheriff’s Officers, Serjeant, Huntsmen, Falconers,
Coachmen, Carters, Servants, Musicians.

MISTRESS ANNE FRANKFORD.
SUSAN, Sister to Sir Charles Mountford.
CICELY, Maid to Mistress Frankford.
Women Servants in Master Frankford’s household.]