Chapter LXXXIII: Prologue: 2947

Where the bee can suck no honey, she leaves her sting behind; and where the bear cannot find origanum[2948] to heal his grief, he blasteth all other leaves with his breath. We fear it is like to fare so with us; that, seeing you cannot draw from our labours sweet content, you leave behind you a sour mislike,[2949] and with open reproach blame our good meaning, because you cannot reap the wonted mirth. Our intent was at this time to move inward delight, not outward lightness; and (5) to breed (if it might be) soft smiling, not loud laughing; knowing it, to the wise, to be a great pleasure to hear counsel mixed with wit, as to the foolish, to have sport mingled with rudeness. They were banished the theatre of Athens, and from Rome hissed, that brought parasites on the stage with apish actions, or fools with uncivil habits, or courtesans with immodest words. We have endeavoured to be as far from unseemly speeches, to make your ears glow, as we hope you (10) will be free from unkind reports, or mistaking the authors’[2950] intention, (who never aimed at any one particular in this play,) to make our cheeks blush. And thus I leave it, and thee to thine own censure, to like or dislike.—VALE.

[INDUCTION]

[_Several_ Gentlemen _sitting on Stools upon the Stage. The_ Citizen, _his_ Wife, _and_ RALPH _sitting below among the Audience_.]

_Enter_ PROLOGUE.

[_Prol._] “From all that’s near the court, from all that’s great,
Within the compass of the city-walls,
We now have brought our scene——”

Citizen [_leaps on the stage_].

_Cit._ Hold your peace, goodman boy!

_Prol._ What do you mean, sir? 5

_Cit._ That you have no good meaning: this seven years there hath
been plays at this house,[2951] I have observed it, you have still
girds[2952] at citizens; and now you call your play “The London
Merchant.” Down with your title,[2953] boy! down with your title! 11

_Prol._ Are you a member of the noble city?

_Cit._ I am.

_Prol._ And a freeman?

_Cit._ Yea, and a grocer.[2954] 15

_Prol._ So, grocer, then, by your sweet favour, we intend no abuse to
the city.

_Cit._ No, sir! yes, sir. If you were not resolv’d to play the
Jacks,[2955] what need you study for new subjects, purposely to abuse
your betters? (20) Why could not you be contented, as well as others,
with “The legend of Whittington,”[2956] or “The Life and Death of Sir
Thomas Gresham, with the building of the Royal Exchange,”[2957] or
“The story of Queen Eleanor, (25) with the rearing of London Bridge
upon woolsacks?”[2958]

_Prol._ You seem to be an understanding man: what would you have us
do, sir? 29

_Cit._ Why present something notably in honour of the commons of the
city.

_Prol._ Why, what do you say to “The Life and Death of fat Drake, or
the Repairing of Fleet-privies?” 34

_Cit._ I do not like that; but I will have a citizen, and he shall be
of my own trade.

_Prol._ Oh, you should have told us your mind a month since; our play
is ready to begin now.

_Cit._ ’T is all one for that; I will have a grocer, and he shall do
admirable[2959] things. 40

_Prol._ What will you have him do?

_Cit._ Marry, I will have him——

_Wife._ (_below._) Husband, husband!

_Ralph._ (_below._) Peace, mistress. 44

_Wife._ [_below._] Hold thy peace, Ralph; I know what I do, I warrant
’ee.—Husband, husband!

_Cit._ What sayst thou, cony?[2960]

_Wife._ [_below._] Let him kill a lion with a (49) pestle, husband!
Let him kill a lion with a pestle!

_Cit._ So he shall.—I’ll have him kill a lion with a pestle.

_Wife._ [_below._] Husband! shall I come up, husband? 55

_Cit._ Ay, cony.—Ralph, help your mistress this way.—Pray,
gentlemen, make her a little room.—I pray you, sir, lend me your
hand to help up my wife: I thank you, sir.—So.

[Wife _comes on the stage_.]

_Wife._ By your leave, gentlemen all; I’m (60) something troublesome.
I’m a stranger here; I was ne’er at one of these plays, as they say,
before; but I should have seen[2961] “Jane Shore”[2962] once; and my
husband hath promised me, any time this twelvemonth, to carry me 65
to “The Bold Beauchamps,”[2963] but in truth he did not. I pray you,
bear with me.

_Cit._ Boy, let my wife and I have a couple of stools and then begin;
and let the grocer do rare things. [_Stools are brought._] 70

_Prol._ But, sir, we have never a boy[2964] to play him: every one
hath a part already.

_Wife._ Husband, husband, for God’s sake, let Ralph play him! Beshrew
me, if I do not think he will go beyond them all. 75

_Cit._ Well rememb’red, wife.—Come up, _Ralph._—I’ll tell you,
gentlemen; let them but lend him a suit of reparel[2965] and
necessaries, and, by gad, if any of them all blow wind in the tail on
him,[2966] I’ll be hang’d. 80

[RALPH _comes on the stage_.]

_Wife._ I pray you, youth, let him have a suit of reparel!—I’ll
be sworn, gentlemen, my husband tells you true. He will act you
sometimes at our house, that all the neighbours (84) cry out on
him; he will fetch you up a couraging part so in the garret, that
we are all as fear’d, I warrant you, that we quake again: we’ll
fear our children with him; if they be never so unruly, do but cry,
“Ralph comes, Ralph comes!” to them, and they’ll be as (90) quiet as
lambs.—Hold up thy head, Ralph; show the gentlemen what thou canst
do; speak a huffing[2967] part; I warrant you, the gentlemen will
accept of it.

_Cit._ Do, Ralph, do. 95

_Ralph._ “By Heaven, methinks, it were an easy leap
To pluck bright honour from the pale-fac’d moon;
Or dive into the bottom of the sea,
Where never fathom-line toucht any ground,
And pluck up drowned honour from the lake of hell.”[2968] 100

_Cit._ How say you, gentlemen, is it not as I told you?

_Wife._ Nay, gentlemen, he hath play’d before, my husband says,
“Mucedorus,”[2969] before the wardens of our company. 105

_Cit._ Ay, and he should have play’d Jeronimo[2970] with a shoemaker
for a wager.

_Prol._ He shall have a suit of apparel, if he will go in.

_Cit._ In, Ralph, in, Ralph; and set out the grocery in their kind,
if thou lov’st me. 111
[_Exit_ RALPH.]

_Wife._ I warrant, our Ralph will look finely when he’s drest.

_Prol._ But what will you have it call’d?

_Cit._ “The Grocer’s Honour.” 115

_Prol._ Methinks “The Knight of the Burning Pestle” were better.

_Wife._ I’ll be sworn, husband, that’s as good a name as can be.

_Cit._ Let it be so.—Begin, begin; my wife and I will sit down. 121

_Prol._ I pray you, do.

_Cit._ What stately music have you? You have shawms?[2971]

_Prol._ Shawms? No.

_Cit._ No! I’m a thief if my mind did not (126) give me so. Ralph
plays a stately part, and he must needs have shawms. I’ll be at the
charge of them myself, rather than we’ll be without them. 130

_Prol._ So you are like to be.

_Cit._ Why, and so I will be: there’s two shillings;—[_Gives
money._]—let’s have the waits of Southwark—they are as rare fellows
as any are in England; and that will fetch them all o’er the water
with a vengeance, as if they (136) were mad.

_Prol._ You shall have them. Will you sit down then?

_Cit._ Ay.—Come, wife. 140

_Wife._ Sit you merry all, gentlemen; I’m bold to sit amongst you for
my ease.
[Citizen _and_ Wife _sit down._]

_Prol._ “From all that’s near the court, from all that’s great,
Within the compass of the city-walls,
We now have brought our scene. Fly far from hence 145
All private taxes,[2972] immodest phrases,
Whatever may but show like vicious!
For wicked mirth never true pleasure brings,
But honest minds are pleas’d with honest things.”—
Thus much for that we do; but for Ralph’s
part you must answer for yourself. 151

_Cit._ Take you no care for Ralph; he’ll discharge himself, I warrant
you. [_Exit_ PROLOGUE.]

_Wife._ I’ faith, gentlemen, I’ll give my word for Ralph. 155